“I was there a month. Only a month, but in that time, my foster brother tried to get into my pants nightly. And one time, he succeeded.”

  “Arlo, sugar,” I whisper again, reaching for her, but this time, it’s she who moves out of my grip.

  “No,” she snaps, standing and taking a few steps away. “I’ve never told anybody this, besides my therapist. And I’m only going to say it once, and then I’ll never repeat it again.” Her fingers swipe against her cheeks, wiping away the tears. “I fought him off for days and days, but then I got the flu. I was weak, and he knew it. He was the predator, and I was the prey, but I was helpless against his strength with my fever. He forced himself on me, Carmello. He stole something from me that I could never get back.”

  “I’m sorry,” I whisper, watching the girl I’ve fallen for come apart, telling me her most private and darkest secret. “I’m so, so sorry, Arlo.”

  “Don’t,” she bites out. “It wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t my fault. I know that now, but it took me a long time to realize it wasn’t my fault.”

  I stay silent, letting her talk.

  “After that, I decided I’d never give a man that part of me again unless I planned on being with him forever. It took me a lot of therapy and a lot of years before I could do anything more than kiss another human being. Although I’m not technically a virgin, in my head, I am. I didn’t consent to him forcing himself on me. I didn’t ask for him to have sex with me. I didn’t want any of it. But when I do give myself to someone, I want it to be because it was my choice and what I wanted and for no other reason. It’s easier to tell people I’m a virgin and have them mock the absurdity of that at my age than to tell them the truth.”

  “You are a virgin, Arlo. You were forced to do something against your will. Virginity isn’t taken. It’s offered, and you didn’t give it to him or anyone.”

  She crumples to her knees in front of me, finally touching my arm to hold herself up. “Do you hate me?” she whispers, her tears falling harder and faster than before.

  I wipe them away, and more replace them before my hand has a chance to move back to the apple of her cheek. “Sugar, no one will ever hurt you again. I promise you that. I’d rather die than let another soul make you cry. Even if you don’t want me anymore, I’ll always look out for you and protect you. I give you my word that I’ll always be there.”

  She stares at me, the faint glow of the sunset reflecting in her tears, her green eyes somehow greener and more vibrant. “If I want you?” she whispers.

  I nod. “Maybe this is going too fast for you.”

  “If I want you?” she repeats again, her eyes still sad and brimming with tears. “Carmello, I wouldn’t have told you if I didn’t want you.”

  “But…” I swallow, hating myself.

  She shakes her head. “No.” She moves her hands up my arms, bringing them to a rest on my biceps. “I want you. I want what we talked about. I want the five years. I want the kids. I want your family. I want all of it, but I need to know you want me. I need to know you can deal with the reality that’s been my life, when you’ve had the fairy tale every kid dreams about having. I’m damaged, Carmello. Maybe too damaged to be in your life.”

  “Don’t say that.” I grab her face, cradling her cheeks gently in my hands. “I’m falling in love with you, Arlo. I want you in my life. I want the five years, the kids, the fairy tale that we create. If anyone’s damaged, it’s me, babe. I’m the one who’s fucked up, not you. I want the forever. The happily ever after. I want to keep every bit of you to myself and only for myself.”

  “You’re falling in love with me?” she whispers, her eyes locked on mine, shining bright in the final remnants of the sunlight.

  “I fell, babe. I already fell,” I whisper back.

  “But we barely know each other.”

  “My dad always said I’d know when I met the person I was meant to be with, and he was right. We can dance around the fact that we were made for each other, or we can jump in and start living our lives, building the happiness we both want and deserve. It’s okay if you don’t feel the same, but—”

  I don’t get the words out before her mouth is on mine, kissing me deep and hard. I kiss her back, losing myself in the taste of her lips and the smell of her skin until the air cools, the sky darkens, and time no longer matters.

  I officially have Arlo, and nothing else matters, including our pasts.

  22

  I take the envelope my father gave me from the side table, watching Arlo as she grabs a bottle of water from my fridge.

  She spent the entire day writing, while I drew a few custom designs I’ve been putting off for clients I have booked later this week.

  If I had told her about the contents earlier, she would’ve pushed her work aside and come over right away. But I didn’t do that, because I knew she was already behind and starting to stress out.

  And after yesterday, I wanted her to focus on something happy, and her writing gives her that. I’m not sure what is inside the envelope, only knowing it is information about her parents.

  She glances over her shoulder like she can feel my eyes on her. “What?” she asks as she turns around with the water in her hand.

  “Come here, sugar,” I tell her, patting the couch next to me.

  She doesn’t move at first, staring at me, and her gaze dips to the envelope. Finally, she heads my way, her footsteps slow as she makes her way to the couch. “What’s wrong?”

  Yesterday at my grandparents’, Arlo had spoken to my father about possibly finding her parents for her. But Dad being Dad, he hadn’t waited for her to give the go-ahead before he’d started digging.

  “My dad stopped by earlier and dropped this off for you.” I hold out the envelope to her, but she doesn’t take it.

  Her eyes are locked on the big brown envelope as she sits. “What’s in it?” she whispers.

  “My dad said he found info on your parents and wanted you to have it ASAP.”

  Arlo’s eyebrows rise, and I expect her to snatch the envelope from my grip, but instead, she’s completely still. “He did?”

  Arlo had given him as many facts about her early childhood as she could remember, but she couldn’t remember much.

  “Yeah, Ar.” I push the envelope closer to her. “Here.”

  “What’s it say?” she asks, finally reaching out and taking it from my hands.

  “I didn’t read it, sugar. It’s not my business.”

  She runs her hand down the outside of the envelope like she’s trying to feel if the news is good or bad without having to open it. “Your dad didn’t tell you?”

  I shake my head.

  She chews on the side of her bottom lip, holding the envelope with both hands. “I don’t know if I want to know. What if it’s bad news, Mello? I can’t take more bad in my life.”

  I place my hand on her knee, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Dad didn’t say, but I’m sure if it were bad news, he would’ve given me a hint so I could be prepared.”

  “I always dreamed of this day, but now I’m scared.” She pushes the envelope back my way. “You open it.”

  My eyebrows furrow. “Me?”

  She nods. “Yeah. If it’s bad news, you can break it to me in that sweet way you have, instead of me reading the words in black-and-white.”

  Fucking great. I understand what she’s saying, but I don’t want to possibly deliver news that would break her heart forever.

  “You sure?” I ask, praying she’ll change her mind.

  “Please.” She retracts her hands like the paper burned her, shaking her head slowly. “I can’t.”

  I stare at her, studying her green eyes. “Whatever you want,” I tell her, but my stomach knots at the very possibility that the news I’m going to have to deliver to her will be devastating.

  She’s had a relatively shitty life—at least, her childhood had been.

  She hugs herself, running her hands up and down her upper arms. “Thank you,” she whispers.

  I undo the metal clasps, peeling back the flap and sliding out the few sheets of white paper inside.

  As I scan the first sheet, the second line jumps out at me. “They’re alive.”

  “Oh, thank God.” She exhales the breath she’s been holding, and then her shoulders slump forward.

  I keep reading, skipping over bits and skimming the document before reading the words to her.

  Mother: Alena Costas

  Location: Chicago, IL

  Alena Costas married David Howell twenty years ago and has resided in the Chicago area since birth. She’s a nurse at Rush Memorial, working in the ICU for the last ten years. Alena and David have no children together, and there’s only one birth on record for Alena. She gave birth to a female child by the name of Karisa Delizonas.

  I peer up to find Arlo barely breathing and clutching her chest.

  “My name’s Karisa?”

  “That’s what she put on your birth certificate, baby.”

  “Is there more?”

  I squeeze her hand and continue.

  Father: Adrian Delizonas

  Location: Chicago, IL

  Adrian Delizonas has been married to Karen Black for the last seventeen years. They live near Greektown and run a successful restaurant that has been passed down in the family for the last fifty years. Adrian and Karen have two children, both under the age of ten.

  It’s unclear the relationship Adrian and Alena had in their youth, but both were under the age of eighteen when Arlo was born.

  When contacted, the adoption agency in Chicago provided a note left in the file, stating both the mother and father had contacted the agency, trying to find any information they could about the baby they gave up almost three decades ago.

  The agency had very little information to give the birth parents due to the adoption and later death of baby Karisa’s parents. They did leave a letter sent by the birth parents inside the file in case Karisa ever contacted the agency. Letter is enclosed.

  Arlo’s fingers are wrapped around my hand so tightly, my fingertips are tingling. “You okay?” I ask her.

  “I don’t know what I am.”

  “Do you want to read the letter?”

  She stares at me with those striking green eyes. I see so much fear mingled with curiosity behind them. If I were in the same situation, I don’t know what I’d do.

  “I don’t know,” she whispers as I hold the envelope with the name Karisa written on the outside in the most beautiful cursive. She moves closer, placing her head against my shoulder, and stares at the envelope. “What if they never want to see me?”

  “But what if they do?” I tell her, kissing the top of her dark-brown hair.

  She sucks in a deep breath before relaxing. “I don’t know if I’m ready for more.”

  My phone vibrates on the armrest next to me.

  “Answer it,” she says as she takes the few sheets of paper from my hands.

  I glance at the screen, letting Arlo read the file for herself.

  Gigi: Mello, you ever going to fess up about what really happened with my sisters yesterday?

  Me: I don’t know what you mean.

  Pike: Wrong move, brother.

  Gigi: They didn’t sleep over at your place for no reason. I’m not stupid. My parents may believe their bullshit, but I don’t.

  Me: They were fine. They were responsible.

  Gigi: Meaning they were white-girl wasted?

  Me: No. They were not.

  Gigi: One of them was.

  Me: I’ll talk to you about it next time I see you.

  Gigi: I expect answers, but they’re not talking.

  Me: Some things are better left unsaid, Gigi.

  Gigi: Not in my world.

  Pike: That shit’s the truth.

  Mammoth:

  Gigi: Shut it.

  Jett: Pike doesn’t want to get laid for a long, long time.

  Nick: Cold, brother. Ice fucking cold.

  Gigi: I’m done with y’all.

  Tamara: Sit on his face and suffocate him to death.

  Pike: Is that supposed to be punishment?

  Arlo takes my phone, placing the papers on the couch next to her, and scrolls through the messages after I start laughing. “I love your family,” she says with a sigh.

  “Why? They’re messed up. Can’t you see that?”

  “That’s what makes them so great. You have a group chat. Do you know how amazingly lucky you are to have that?”

  “Do you know how hard it is to get any sleep with them chattering all hours of the day and night?”

  “I’d give up some sleep to have a tribe.”

  I bend my head, placing my face in her neck. “My tribe is your tribe now, sugar.”

  “I’ll know I’ve made it once I’m in the chat.”

  “I’ll add you now.”

  “No,” she says immediately. “I don’t want a pity add.”

  “What the hell is a pity add?” I ask her, confused.

  “I want to be added because people want me there, not because my big mouth said something.”

  “They want you.”

  “No, they don’t.”

  “The girls will want you. They’re outnumbered right now.”

  “Does everyone keep gender score in your family?”

  “Basically,” I murmur against her skin. “And I’m the only one not married in this chat. They took pity on me and allowed me in the chat because Rocco’s my twin or else I wouldn’t even be in it. It sucks when there’s no one to have my back.”

  She turns and sits up, facing me. “Your brother always has your back.”

  “Not when Rebel’s involved and thinks differently from me. Wife trumps brother.”

  Arlo laughs. “I’ll never make you choose.”

  “You will, and I’ll happily take your side over his.”

  She blinks, her laughter dying. “Why?”

  “Because he isn’t the one who will be sleeping next to me, sugar.”

  She smiles and my heart flutters, the same feeling Arlo’s given me since I laid eyes on her. “You’re silly. There’re no sides if we’re all family.”

  I pull her forward, bringing her lips close to mine. “You have so much to learn, Arlo. So much to learn. But don’t worry, babe. I’ll teach you all the things.”

  “What kinds of things?” she asks playfully, batting her beautiful dark eyelashes.

  “Anything you want, including all the dirty things.” I waggle my eyebrows, pulling her in closer, going for a kiss.

  “Will you show me how to do that thing with your mouth?”

  “What thing would that be?” I raise an eyebrow, liking where she’s going with this.

  “The one where you put your lips on me and make my toes curl.” She smirks, staring into my eyes with nothing but mischief.

  “Does my girl want her world rocked?”

  “Your girl wants an orgasm,” she answers honestly.

  I move forward, pushing her back into the couch and covering her with my body. “Whatever my girl wants, she gets,” I tell her before I take her mouth with mine.

  Her fingers slide up my biceps and glide under the sleeves of my T-shirt, anchoring herself to me. She kisses me back, moaning into my mouth as I press my dick against her middle, knowing how much she loves to have her pussy touched.

  I ache for her, wanting nothing more than to plunge my dick deep inside her. But I also know it won’t happen until she is emotionally ready, and I am okay with that too.

  Our tongues move together until I pull my head back, pushing myself down her body and taking her pants with me, leaving her bottom bare.

  I don’t go in for the kill right away. I kiss her stomach, sweeping my lips across her abdomen, worshiping every inch of her body I can until she’s squirming underneath me.

  Using my hands, I push her legs apart, opening her to me. Her knees fall to the sides, and she lifts her bottom off the cushion, wanting more than I’ve given.

  Even with her open, I don’t go straight for her clit. I kiss around her legs, nipping at the skin that makes her moan until she chases my mouth, looking for more.

  “Mello,” she breathes, reaching down and sliding her fingers into my hair. “Stop teasing me.”

  I bury my face in her pussy, sucking and licking every inch of her, teasing her clit and making her ass rise and fall with each stroke.

  It doesn’t take long before her muscles seize, and her breathing grows harsher as the orgasm starts to build. Her thighs clamp shut against my face, suffocating me in her pussy, and if I die now, I’ll die a happy man. I don’t stop. I don’t let up. I suck harder, taking her clit into my mouth and flicking it with my tongue until she’s screaming my name, twisting her body through the pleasure.

  I pull myself up, curling her into my side as she lies there, spent. She sags into me, still breathing heavy.

  “Do you want to talk about…”

  “No. I just want to lie here in your arms.”

  “Whatever you want, babe. Whatever you want.”

  A few minutes later, Arlo’s body stills and her breathing deepens. I pick up my phone and continue the conversation with my family.

  Me: What do you think about adding Arlo to the conversation?

  Lily: Yes!

  Gigi: Fuck yeah.

  Tamara: Abso-fucking-lutely

  Jo: Do it.

  Rebel: Balance of power is shifting.

  Pike: It’s always been shifted.

  Mammoth: Pussy always rules.

  Tamara: Smart man.

  Rocco: The man finally has his head out of his ass. When’s the date?

  Me: The date?

  Rocco: For the wedding, dumbass.

  Me: There’s no wedding.

  Rocco: There better be. Do not let that one get away.

  Me: It’s been weeks, brother. Weeks.

  Pike: Time is irrelevant when it comes to love.

  Me: Weeks.

  Mammoth: You want any other women?

  Me: No.

  Jett: Put a ring on it.

  Me: But what if it’s too early?

  Gigi: Half of marriages end in divorce no matter how soon you get married. Stop being a pussy and just do it, cousin.

  Me: You’re really inspirational, Gigi.