The casebook of sidney z.., p.35
The Casebook of Sidney Zoom,
p.35
Samson tried the door. It was locked.
Zoom nodded a signal. The men crashed their shoulders against the door, which splintered free of the lock, shivered on its hinges.
A man with his legs tied to a heavy chair waved his arms and snarled irascibly. “It certainly is time you rescued me. A hell of a fine bunch of police you are! Or,
I suppose you call yourselves detectives, since you don’t wear uniforms, but I’m a taxpayer and a big taxpayer. I’m entitled to better protection than this. I’ve been a prisoner for days and you are just now getting here …”
Sidney Zoom’s grin was malicious.
“You’re wrong,” he interrupted. “We’re not just getting here, we’re just leaving.”
With a nod to Samson, he slammed the door shut in the face of the expostulating prisoner.
CHAPTER VII
Curious Accounting
SIDNEY ZOOM sprawled at long-legged ease on the deck of his yacht, watched the sun glint on the sparkling waves, felt the swing of the craft as it rolled to the long, lazy swells. Seated opposite him, his lips chewing nervously at a cigar, was a hatchet-faced individual from whose spectacles dangled a long black ribbon which from time to
time was swung gently by the warm breeze.
“As your attorney,” he said, “I would say that you had not violated the law. A forgery is not a criminal act unless it is perpetrated with the intention to deceive, and the fact that you advised the bank at the time you presented the check to be cashed that it was forged probably constitutes a defense.
“It is, moreover, apparent that you did not profit in any way by any of the forgeries.
You used them to detect crime, instead of to perpetrate crime.”
Zoom smiled, elevated his long legs and placed his feet on the rail of the yacht. “On the other hand,” said the attorney, “the police are making a widespread inquiry
for the purpose of ascertaining the identity of the tall individual who entered into the case. They have a very good description of you.”
“Description,” said Sidney Zoom, “don’t mean anything. I’m on the point of taking a month’s cruise to tropical waters, anyway.”
The attorney nodded his head slowly.
“As between Finley Carter and the bank, however,” he said, “there is a very peculiar legal problem. Carter received most of the money that had been withdrawn from his account when the police nabbed Harry Exter and his confederates. The man who posed as Finley Carter was an actor who had spent some time studying Carter’s voice until he could mimic it perfectly. Of course, Exter got the idea when he learned that Carter was in the habit of signing blank checks drawn on his housekeeping account, and leaving them in the hands of his secretary. Carter, of course, thought he was protected by the fact that he never kept over five hundred dollars in that bank. He didn’t realize what would happen if some crooks got possession of all of his mail and made deposits in the account. It only required a rubber stamp to deposit the money to Carter’s account.
“On the other hand, the checks that made the withdrawals were genuine checks, with the exception of the forged check which cleaned out the account. But, as I have stated, the bank was advised at the time that check was presented that it was probably a forgery. Nevertheless, the check was cashed and the money deposited to the account of Nell Benton.”
Sidney Zoom stretched his arms above his head, took a deep inhalation of the fresh ocean air.
“Well,” he said, “that was what I wanted to see you about particularly. I don’t know just how repentant Carter will be for the wrong that he did Nell Benton, or just how grateful he will be to Burt Samson for the part Samson played in rescuing him from the crooks. I want you, therefore, to represent the interests of Miss Benton.”
“You mean in asking a reward?” the lawyer inquired.
“No,” said Sidney Zoom, “in tactfully explaining to Mr. Finley Carter that she has a very good cause of action against him for defamation of character.
“You might further explain to all parties concerned that there is quite a question as to the legality of the deposit in Miss Benton’s name, inasmuch as the legal questions seem somewhat confused. In other words, what I want you to do is to add confusion to the legal question.”
“To what end?” inquired the attorney.
“To the end,” said Sidney Zoom, “of securing a very good cash settlement from Mr. Finley Carter—a settlement which will take care of Burt Samson, as well as Nell Benton.”
“You had some figure in mind?” inquired the attorney cautiously.
“Yes,” said Sidney Zoom, “I thought that after the legal questions had been properly confused, a settlement might be made for ten thousand dollars. That could be effected by having Nell Benton execute a complete release and make a check in favor of Finley Carter for two hundred and ninety-one dollars and fifteen cents, because, you see, the ten thousand has already been deposited to her account.”
The attorney blinked his eyes at Sidney Zoom.
“Well, by heaven,” he said, “you’re the coolest customer I ever had to deal with!
Someday I’m going to see you on your road to jail.”
“In the meantime,” said Sidney Zoom, “I will have derived a lot of amusement from life, and have, perhaps, done some good.”
“You’ve got all the money you want,” the attorney rasped. “You’ve got nothing to do except cruise around and enjoy life. Why the devil do you mess around the big cities, mixing into crime?”
“For the same reason,” said Sidney Zoom, “that I am going into tropical waters and fish for swordfish with light tackle—because I like it. When it gets dark I’ll swing in close to the shore, put you in a launch and see that you’re landed—just like the rum-runners used to land their cargo. And, of course, you’ll add to my bill fair compensation for whatever inconvenience is caused you.”
The lawyer sighed.
“Well,” he said, “I guess it’s all right. You saved Carter’s life. They probably would have killed him when they got ready to take it ‘on the lam,’ as the crooks express it. But you certainly skated on thin ice yourself. You stole some of the crooks’ thunder.”
Zoom lit a cigarette.
“Yes,” he said, as he sent twin streamers of smoke through his satisfied nostrils, “I stole some of the crooks’ thunder, and, all in all, it was a very satisfactory job of larceny.”
THE CASES OF SIDNEY ZOOM
“The Higher Court.” Detective Fiction Weekly, March 8, 1930.
“Willie the Weeper.” Detective Fiction Weekly, March 8, 1930. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
“ ‘My Name Is Zoom’.” Detective Fiction Weekly, April 12, 1930. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
“Time in for Tucker.” Detective Fiction Weekly, September 13, 1930. “Stranger’s Silk.” Detective Fiction Weekly, January 3, 1931.
“The Death Penalty.” Detective Fiction Weekly, January 17, 1931.
“Borrowed Bullets.” Detective Fiction Weekly, March 21, 1931. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
“The Vanishing Corpse.” Detective Fiction Weekly, August 15, 1931.
“Higher Up.” Detective Fiction Weekly, September 19, 1931. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
“The First Stone.” Detective Fiction Weekly, October 24, 1931. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
“It Takes a Crook.” Detective Fiction Weekly, October 24, 1931.
“The Green Door.” Detective Fiction Weekly, August 20, 1932. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
“Cheating the Chair.” Detective Fiction Weekly, September 17, 1932. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
“Inside Job.” Detective Fiction Weekly, January 7, 1933. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
“Lifted Bait.” Detective Fiction Weekly, October 21, 1933. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
“Stolen Thunder.” Detective Fiction Weekly, March 19, 1934. Collected in The Casebook of Sidney Zoom.
247
THE CASES OF SIDNEY ZOOM
The Casebook of Sidney Zoom by Erle Stanley Gardner, edited by Bill Pronzini, is set in Garamond and printed on 60-pound Natural acid-free paper. The cover is by Juha Lindroos, and the Lost Classsics design is by Deborah Miller. The Casebook of Sidney Zoom was published in January 2006 by Crippen & Landru Publishers, Norfolk, Virginia.
CRIPPEN & LANDRU, PUBLISHERS
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Cincinnati, OH 45253
E-mail: info@crippenlandru.com;
toll-free 844 622-6656
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LOST CLASSICS
Crippen & Landru is proud to publish a series of new short-story collections by great authors who specialized in traditional mysteries. Each book collects stories from crumbling pages of old pulp, digest, and slick magazines, and most of the stories have been “lost” since their first publication. The following books are in print:
The Newtonian Egg and Other Cases of Rolf le Roux by Peter Godfrey, introduction by Ronald Godfrey. 2002.
Murder, Mystery and Malone by Craig Rice, edited by Jeffrey A. Marks. 2002.
The Sleuth of Baghdad: The Inspector Chafik Stories, by Charles B. Child. 2002.
Hildegarde Withers: Uncollected Riddles by Stuart Palmer, introduction by Mrs. Stuart Palmer. 2002.
The Spotted Cat and Other Mysteries from Inspector Cockrill’s Casebook by Christianna Brand, edited by Tony Medawar. 2002.
Marksman and Other Stories by William Campbell Gault, edited by Bill Pronzini; afterword by Shelley Gault. 2003.
Karmesin: The World’s Greatest Criminal – Or Most Outrageous Liar by Gerald Kersh, edited by Paul Duncan. 2003.
The Complete Curious Mr. Tarrant by C. Daly King, introduction by Edward D. Hoch. 2003.
The Pleasant Assassin and Other Cases of Dr. Basil Willing by Helen McCloy, introduction by B.A. Pike. 2003.
Murder – All Kinds by William L. DeAndrea, introduction by Jane Haddam. 2003.
The Avenging Chance and Other Mysteries from Roger Sheringham’s Casebook by Anthony Berkeley, edited by Tony Medawar and Arthur Robinson. 2004.
Banner Deadlines: The Impossible Files of Senator Brooks U. Banner by Joseph Commings, edited by Robert Adey; memoir by Edward D. Hoch. 2004.
The Danger Zone and Other Stories by Erle Stanley Gardner, edited by Bill Pronzini. 2004.
Dr. Poggioli: Criminologist by T.S. Stribling, edited by Arthur Vidro. 2004.
The Couple Next Door: Collected Short Mysteries by Margaret Millar, edited by Tom Nolan. 2004.
Sleuth’s Alchemy: Cases of Mrs. Bradley and Others by Gladys Mitchell, edited by Nicholas Fuller. 2005.
Who Was Guilty? Two Dime Novels by Philip S. Warne/Howard W. Macy, edited by Marlena E. Bremseth. 2005.
Slot-Machine Kelly: The Collected Cases of the One-Armed Bandit by Dennis Lynds writing as Michael Collins, introduction by Robert J. Randisi. 2005.
Rafael Sabatini, The Evidence of the Sword, edited by Jesse Knight. 2006.
Julian Symons, The Detections of Francis Quarles, edited by John Cooper; afterword by Kathleen Symons. 2006.
Erle Stanley Gardner, The Casebook of Sidney Zoom, edited by Bill Pronzini. 2006.
Ellis Peters (Edith Pargeter), The Trinity Cat and Other Mysteries, edited by Martin Edwards and Sue Feder.
Lloyd Biggle, Jr., The Grandfather Rastin Mysteries, introduction by Kenneth Lloyd Biggle and Donna Biggle Emerson.
Max Brand, Masquerade: Nine Crime Stories, edited by William F. Nolan, Jr.
Hugh Pentecost, The Battles of Jericho, introduction by S.T. Karnick.
Mignon G. Eberhart, Dead Yesterday and Other Mysteries, edited by Rick Cypert and Kirby McCauley.
Victor Canning, The Minerva Club, The Department of Patterns and Other Stories, edited by John Higgins.
Elizabeth Ferrars, The Casebook of Jonas P. Jonas and Others, edited by John Cooper.
Anthony Boucher and Denis Green, The Casebook of Gregory Hood, edited by Joe R. Christopher.
Philip Wylie, Ten Thousand Blunt Instruments, edited by Bill Pronzini.
SUBSCRIPTIONS
Crippen & Landru offers discounts to individuals and institutions who place Standing Order Subscriptions for its forthcoming publications, either all the Regular Series or all the Lost Classics or (preferably) both. Collectors can thereby guarantee receiving limited editions, and readers won’t miss any favorite stories. Standing Order Subscribers receive a specially commissioned story in a deluxe edition as a gift at the end of the year. Please write or e-mail for more details.
Table of Contents
INTRODUCTION
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
WILLIE THE WEEPER
MY NAME IS ZOOM!
BORROWED BULLETS
HIGHER UP
THE FIRST STONE
THE GREEN DOOR
CHEATING THE CHAIR
INSIDE JOB
LIFTED BAIT
STOLEN THUNDER
SUBSCRIPTIONS
Erle Stanley Gardner, The Casebook of Sidney Zoom
