He looks down and, for a second, he looks like a fallen angel with steam swirling around his chest. “The king beat Rhodes and me senseless. Anthony and Rochelle looked after us both, making sure we would live through it. Rhodes was thankful, but he saw that I had found my friends. I was pretending with Finnegan, Aleksander and Onyx at that point, but I hated lying. Anthony knew what I was, and he didn’t judge me, neither did Rochelle. For a while, it was just the three of us.” He gulps once. “But I was lonely and foolish.”

  He doesn’t carry on, not until I take one more fateful step down towards him. I can see he doesn’t want to tell me this. I need to hear it though. “Rochelle’s older sister came to Starlight City to visit her one weekend, when things were bad for me. The king was growing increasingly angry, and he had hurt Rhodes for it, leaving him with so many broken bones… I spent over twenty hours awake and putting them back for him so he would survive. When it was clear he would live, I met up with Anthony, Rochelle, and her sister, Lacey. It was one night that I barely remember. Between the lack of sleep, the whiskey I drank to forget, and the pills she dropped into my drink to cheer me up…it was all a blur. I don’t want Franklin to ever know this, but it was not what I wanted. I never once looked at anyone and wanted them, not after I knew you existed.”

  “Hollis…” I breathe. “That’s assault. Not a choice.”

  “And it stays between us. Please,” he asks.

  “Gods, I would never say a word.” I shake my head. “This stays between us.”

  “Another step, mate.” He softly orders me. I take a step, the warm water moving to my knees. I’m scared, but his story is everything I needed to hear. “A few months later, Lacey told me she was pregnant and was planning to come back to give me the child to raise. She didn’t want it. I did not know what to say. Only that I had to do the responsible thing and take my child. Anthony and Rhodes talked me through it and promised to be there. Even though you had rejected us, we were still looking for you, and I felt like I had betrayed you.” My heart cracks. “And it was fine for a while until she gave birth. She died in childbirth from complications, and Rochelle was left with no other family other than the baby and Anthony. I was just handed a small baby and told to care for him. He didn’t even have a name. She never thought to give one to him, and Rochelle was in mourning, Anthony with her. So, I named him.”

  I feel tears filling my eyes. He must have felt so alone. “Did you know my father’s middle name was Franklin?”

  “Yes. I admired your father for raising a child that wasn’t even his. For loving you, and I secretly wanted to show you that even though I was holding another woman’s child, I was thinking of you always.” A sob catches in my throat. “I did not know about the drowning at that point.”

  Another step down, I’m half in a trance the entire time. “Things were okay for a while. Anthony and Rochelle…we all got along well and focused on raising Franklin. Rhodes helped out too, but he was making sure the king didn’t know of Franklin. We weren’t sure the king wouldn’t take Franklin to be a new commander or kill him outright. Franklin wasn’t part of our orders.”

  I wondered when they stopped following the Vian king’s orders, and it must have been around the time they found out about me. The decision was firm when Franklin came into the world. One more step and the water hovers at my upper thighs.

  “Then, two years ago, everything changed. I was out with Anthony, and we got into a human car crash of all things, just outside Edinburgh. Something easy that we could have walked away from. This one we did not. We were attacked by Vian, sent by the king as revenge for Franklin. He found out. I fought them as hard as I could, but one of them was a top commander, and he had a power that nullified other powers. This man was brutal, and he killed Anthony in front of me, and there was nothing I could do. I barely escaped with my life. I had to leave his body there with them to get back to Franklin and make sure he was safe. Thankfully, Rhodes overheard the king’s plans and went for Franklin to hide him. He didn’t know the king had also sent people after me and Anthony.”

  “I know who you mean, I think. He came into Starlight City looking for me at one point,” I whisper.

  “You’ll find he’s not alive anymore.”

  “Good.” Another step and tension skips in the air.

  “Rochelle thought she’d lost everything and it was my fault. She wouldn’t listen to reason, and she wanted me to suffer for Anthony. She took Franklin back to the Vian city, where I could not go often because I was ordered to stay in Starlight. She knew that I was under the king’s orders never to leave, never to be suspicious, and to never show any of my Vian side. If I’d gone into that city and taken Franklin, then I couldn’t have come back for you. Rochelle got close to the king, claiming she was controlling me, and got the king’s blessing to bring Franklin up in the city, to train him, and when he is old enough, make him a commander like his father. I was livid, but I knew if I took Franklin, everything would be over. We’d all end up dead. Rhodes would have been killed too, and then you, when you were found. She knew this, and so she blackmailed me. She made it very clear that she wanted you to suffer and for me to suffer. For both of us to know what the pain of not having our mates was like. She commanded everything that I did, using my son as leverage, and only allowed me to see him if I played a part in her schemes.”

  That bitch is dead. He looks down still, like he doesn’t want to see my reaction. “Hollis,” I breathe. “Look at me.”

  He slowly lifts his head, his eyes wet with tears, and his face kills me. Gods, he hates himself. “You don’t need forgiveness, but for what it might be worth, I give it to you. I am so sorry for what you lost, for what you suffered and… Can I ask a question?” The water’s up to my chest now, and I’m so close to him. God, I’m scared, but he’s very much distracting me. “Do you love me? Are you in love with me, Hollis?”

  “I’ve been in love with you since I first saw you, mate,” he whispers, and my heart warms. “I may have kissed her, but I felt nothing, absolutely nothing, yet one touch from you and it was like I was burning alive, and I hated it. I hated that I could not have you. I pushed you away because I know I’m not deserving of you, and you could do so much better. I was being torn fucking apart with how I feel, and I’m done with that. I have my son and he’s safe. I don’t expect you to accept him or want anything to do with him⁠—”

  “Hollis, I want to know him.” I stop him from going further with that thought. Franklin is part of my mate, and he will be part of my life. “And I love you too. You’re infuriating and maddening, but you’re mine. I liked being your rival because it was as close as I could get to you. Now, there is nothing in the world that’s going to stop us from being together.”

  “Nothing.” He comes closer. “Are you sure, mate? I’m a possessive bastard, and if you say you’re mine, I’m never letting you go.”

  “You did a good job of making me think you hate me.” I move closer. “That’s the thing, Hollis.” I wrap my arms around his neck. “I always trusted you, and I never understood why until right this moment. I’m yours. We still have things to discuss with Rhodes and Georgina, but it won’t break us.” His body tenses as the water moves around us. I’m shaking as he grips me to him, holding me close. “You got me in the pool. It’s the first time I’ve been in a pool and not been terrified.”

  “Then let me fully distract you.” He slams his lips onto mine, and it’s like coming home, and I can finally taste him. Hollis groans against me, and I gasp, wanting so much more. I sink into the kiss as he deepens it, pulling as close as I can get, and I moan as I feel how hard he is between my legs.

  The lift clicks open, and we both turn, seeing Finnegan running in with Aleksander behind him. “Gwen, I need to leave. The Vian king has my sister and father in Starlight City. He found them.”

  Chapter

  Fourteen

  Once my aunt learnt of the threat, she immediately got things ready for us to leave, while I told Finnegan about my dream. It wasn’t just a dream, and I should have said something to him. But, as he pointed out, what difference would it have made? We wouldn’t have known where to find them, and it would have left us in the same position we are in right now. At least my dream told me one thing the Vian king didn’t—Severi has Franklin and Nibbles. There is no way he would have left a kid and my dog in the forest alone. Why didn’t Georgina take them for the king as leverage? I shake my head and focus on the now, on what I’m going to be walking into.

  Six huge army helicopters wait for us in the pouring rain, the propellers spinning loud and wild against the downfall. There is one for my mates and me. The others are full of soldiers that have volunteered to go into Starlight City to help who they can get out while we make a good distraction. It’s a trap, I know it is, but the king has Finnegan’s family, and there isn’t a world where I wouldn’t go to any lengths to help him. It made me feel like I was part of a new family today when we all started making plans for Starlight, and not one of my mates or I even thought about not going. I could see it meant a lot to Finnegan.

  My aunt stops at my side as Onyx moves aside for her. Her umbrella briefly keeps the downfall of rain off me, and I miss it. I need the icy rain right now to cool how I’m feeling inside. “Each helicopter can take around twenty to forty people back, niece. They are reporting to you and your mates, and they are on orders to help you however they can.”

  “The plan is rescue, not to do anything else. I’m not sure what is going to happen, but I’m going to be okay because I have them.” I nod at my mates. I feel them all watching me in the way they always do, just in case I need help or backup.

  “Come back. It’s been nice having family around.” It’s the most vulnerable she is willing to show me, and I appreciate it. The helicopters are growing in noise, and it’s getting so loud it’s vibrating against my chest. “It’s a bit of a ride from here. Whatever happens, I am praying for you.”

  “Wait.” I stop her from leaving. “Why did my sister never trust you and come here? I have to know. It’s been burning in my mind. My mother always said we couldn’t trust anybody, and we always had to run. My father was never quite on board with that, but you sound like you loved her. You’ve offered a sanctuary in this amazing city, and yet she didn’t come. You’re sending me with soldiers to rescue a city that you owe nothing to either, so I’m thinking you’re not all that bad. So why? She never called Starlight City her home, and she hated it there.”

  “We were born in Starlight City, and that’s the very reason she hated it and its people. We were orphans, and we don’t know what happened to our parents. I searched for any records of us, but the time we were born was not good for Starlight City after a recent Vian attack. I was a year older than my sister at the time, but she would have been days old. Many were killed over that weekend of attacks; several hospitals were the targets, and if our parents had Elly there and brought me to visit, it’s likely they are dead and we were lucky to survive. There was just us, our awful foster parents, and our plan to escape Starlight City the moment we could. I loved my sister so very, very much. Even though I was slightly older, she was always in charge and told me as much when it came to any decision making.”

  She smiles softly at the memory. “Her hatred of Nexus, of Starlight, was the only thing we disagreed on. Just because we grew up with most of our kind and had the scars to prove it, did not mean all Nexus were cursed or evil. When she got a mate at the ceremony, she wasn’t happy. Your father did everything he could to make her happy, but it was a fight, and in the end, he lost. What happened to my sister warped her mind so much that paranoia and darkness were all she saw. After losing a child, that was it for her. The trauma cracked her open, and there was no fixing it. It was like she was a ghost, walking in the body of my sister, and I didn’t know how to get through to her. Your father was so scared of her running off with you alone that he didn’t dare say anything. I do believe if she had made a slightly different choice and brought both of you here together, then perhaps it wouldn’t have ended badly and her mind wouldn’t have been lost. I look at you now and I see that you probably ended up with the childhood we both once swore our eventual children would not have.” She touches my arm as so much clicks into place about my childhood, about what my mother was like and why my father always did what she asked. “Promises made by kids who wanted a good world, and only one of us kept that vow. I didn’t have children because this city became my promise. Do you understand?”

  “I’m beginning to.” I nod, covering her hand with mine. “Thank you for telling me all of that. My parents died before I could ask them these questions, and they never got to see the me that I am now. They only ever saw me scared and on the run.”

  “Do you forgive them?” she quietly asks.

  I think back to the mirrors, and I know deep down in my heart I do. They made every bad decision and fucked everything up for me over and over, but I truly believe that they were trying to protect me. They did something wrong, but they were trying their best in the only way they knew. The mating ceremony should never have happened the way it did, and the drownings should never have happened. The life on the run, the hunger of missed meals, and the coldness of the floors I slept on. The life that I did not ask for and that the parents I loved were meant to protect me from. But holding onto this hate, this bitterness, will only end up turning me into the parents I don’t want to be like. I’m choosing to forgive them for myself, for the peaceful life with my own soul that I want in order to thrive. That’s enough for me to forgive them. What’s the point in hating the dead when hate only taints your own soul? “They know I do.”

  Her eyes well up as she lowers her hand. “Will you consider spending some more time here when you can? I’d like to think of a future where I can spend time getting to know you and seeing you grow. I want you to have hobbies that don’t involve death and darkness.”

  “I’m sorry, those two are quite attached to my soul,” I joke. “But yes, I’d like to spend time here too.” With her. My aunt. I have some family left…and she isn’t all that bad.

  “Good. It’s likely everything’s going to be destroyed in the near future.” She smiles.

  “That’s a bit of a morbid joke, isn’t it?” I laugh.

  “You’ll learn that I like making them the more you get to know me. Where do you think you got your dark humour from?” She glances at Finnegan, who has moved away. “I best speak with your mate before I go. May the Gods be with you.”

  May they not. I want to pray to the stars now; I might have more hope from them. Annie comes over when my aunt has left, dressed in purple ranger clothes and a sword on her back. They match my own, and I much prefer the black on us. “You okay?” she asks.

  “Not really,” I admit to her, because there aren’t many I would tell it to. “I don’t want to take my mates there when the Vian king could hurt them. I feel like something bad is going to happen.”

  “But you’re still going to go for Finnegan.” She hugs my side. “Whatever happens, it will be okay.” I rest my head on hers, looking across to see Onyx watching us. I know he hasn’t told her yet, and it’s not my place to either. I know it will be hard for Annie to hear the truth about who her father was, when she really didn’t like him and he kept trying to kill her best friend. He was also creepy as fuck. I’m glad both Onyx and Annie seem to have inherited everything from their mothers.

  Issan walks up to us and Annie goes tense, moving to straighten up. “Go away⁠—”

  “I’m coming with you and wanted to make our leader aware.” Issan cuts her off. “The decision is not yours to make, Annie.”

  She narrows her eyes and clenches her fists. “Fuck off.”

  He smirks. “No.”

  The tension between them makes me want to step back, but Annie’s hand is tight on my arm. My aunt comes to stand in front of us both. “Ah, I’m glad you decided to go with them, Issan. He might be some kind of defence as he can shield extremely well against attacks.”

  “It’s not a choice. I am leading the soldiers going in. I’ll meet you there, Miss Autumn.” He goes and gets into one of the other helicopters, and Annie glares at his back until he is out of sight. I look between the two of them, realising something that I probably should have noticed before. There’s something there, and I make a mental note to ask Annie about him later. I have to be nosy.

  “GWEN!” Finn shouts, holding open the door of the helicopter we are using. I smile at my aunt before jogging over to Finnegan with Annie. We both climb in and Aleksander hands us headphones, which we slide on to stop the loud whooshing from deafening us. Annie takes the solo seat near the front, and I go to sit in the back seat, and Hollis quickly slides into the seat next to me before Finn can get there, so it’s just us two alone. Finn glares at him, and Hollis winks back. A low growl echoes through the headphones, and I shake my head at them both.

  Aleksander sits next to Finnegan, and Onyx sits in the seat alone by the door. Winking, smiling, this is all new for Hollis, and I like it. Everything changed between us in that pool, and I wonder exactly how he is going to distract me for the next swimming lesson. I shiver at the thought.

  When the helicopter goes up into the air and begins our long journey, I pull out Rhodes’s letter. I know I need to read it, and I need a distraction right now. Hollis doesn’t say a word as I open it up next to him, light pouring in from the dying sun outside. I’m glad it’s him sitting next to me as I read this. The truth is, I’m desperate for something from Rhodes and to know what he is doing. I can’t trust him, and I’m not sure where it leaves us, but this separation is hard because the Rhodes before the betrayal had a hold on my heart. That hold is still there, and I can’t erase him completely. He’s written quite a bit.