Brina snorted. “Did she try to say the men were her escape?”

  “She did. I didn’t buy it. I get it, I ran too, or in some people’s eyes, but I didn’t hurt anyone in the process. I’d never do that to my family. I’d never do that to anyone I cared for. My mother, she doesn’t exist in my eyes anymore.”

  Since he’d moved away from her, she started to walk out. “Show me where the boxes are for your kitchen stuff.”

  “I’m sorry,” he said. “I feel like I say that to you a lot. I guess this wasn’t a great conversation to have.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I understand why you don’t believe in romance and love and all that froo froo stuff. I don’t either.”

  “Then tell me why.”

  She supposed she had that coming since she started the conversation. “My cousin Blair is all about love and romance and just had horrible luck with men until she found Philip. That’s a long story in itself. My sister Hannah is kind of the same way. She at least tries.”

  “But not you?” he asked. “You don’t try?”

  “Not anymore. I’ve had boyfriends over the years. Nothing really serious. When I was in law school though I met someone in class. Let’s just say everything you hate about lawyers he ended up being.”

  “And you don’t want to talk about it,” he said.

  “I feel I should say a few things so you understand me.”

  “You don’t have to.”

  “But I want to,” she said back. “Everything was good for a year or so, but then after a job at a law firm during school he saw where the money was. He was doing work with defense attorneys. He knew what I wanted to do. I’d never kept that a secret.”

  “It’s not about the money for you,” he said.

  “It never has been. But he saw where he could make his mark, or so he said. He got greedy and didn’t care who got hurt in the end. You will hear a lot of lawyers say everyone has a right to representation and they do. Don’t get me wrong. But money buys people’s way a lot in life. If you don’t have the money you can get screwed.”

  “I can see where having two different ideals made it hard to get along.”

  “Especially when I was originally drawn to the fact we both believed in the same things. That we both were out for justice, not money. The other is I don’t really feel a man defines a woman. That she has to have one in her life to do things for her. He knew that. He didn’t like it though. I had said multiple times if I ever got married I’d keep my own name if it was after I’d already been established.”

  “Makes complete sense.”

  “That wouldn’t bother you? Not that I’m asking because I want to get married or anything. I mean, we said fun, and we are only talking,” she rushed out to say.

  “A name is only a name. How many people don’t even get married anymore but just live together? I don’t have a lot of thoughts on it one way or another. Especially since my parents’ marriage was just such a lovely walk in the garden. If they weren’t married, they could have both just left and been done with it.”

  “Even with kids?” she asked.

  “If I get to that point, I’ll deal with it. I’m not saying I don’t want kids. I actually do.”

  “Okay. I do too. But here’s the deal. I said if I didn’t have a child by the time I was thirty-five and I didn’t have a man in my life, then I’d take care of it myself.”

  He started to laugh at her. “Meaning, you’d ask someone to be the father?”

  “No. I’d never do that. I’d just go buy the sperm. That’s what Blair’s mother did.”

  “I didn’t expect to hear that.”

  “And now that does bother you?” she said, wondering if this was why she never ended up in relationships anymore.

  “No. It’s your life and your body. But I’ll be honest with you, if we’re together by the time you’re thirty-five don’t think you are buying any anonymous man’s sperm.”

  She opened her mouth and then shut it. What the hell was she supposed to say to that?

  18

  Gold Mine

  The minute that statement was out of Nathan’s mouth he wished he could have thrown the car in reverse and slammed on the gas.

  For a man that said he didn’t care about love and romance, he’d just admitted he wanted kids someday and then started talking about three years into the future when they just said they were both out for fun.

  “So you’d want a kid with me?” she asked.

  “That came out wrong,” he said.

  “I don’t think it did. I think it showed some possessiveness.”

  “And you don’t like that in men, do you? Your ex wanted you to take his name. It sounds like possessiveness right there and it set you off.”

  “I don’t understand the whole name thing. I mean I do, but I don’t either. It’s just a name. It doesn’t mean you love anyone any less or more.”

  “No, it doesn’t. I feel the same way,” he said.

  “But not about buying sperm.”

  He had no clue how this conversation turned into this. “I’m just saying, if we are still together three years from now, why would you buy it when I’d consider the fact we were in a serious relationship.”

  “Oh. I get it now.”

  “Do you?” Because he sure the hell didn’t even though he was talking about it.

  “Yeah. You’ve got nothing against a woman doing that though, right?”

  “No. It’s their life. It’d be your life. If that is what makes you happy, then so be it.”

  “So if I did do that and we’d met after the fact. Would you have had a problem knowing I had a kid that way?”

  “We are talking about a lot of what ifs. I already know you. You didn’t do it, so it doesn’t matter, but I think it matters to you. The short answer is no. It’d mean there’d be no ex in your life that could make things messy.”

  She moved into his arms. “This is the craziest conversation. I never expected us to have it, but in a way I’m glad we did.”

  “Why’s that?”

  “Because you said I’m not like any other lawyer you know and I can say you aren’t like a lot of men I know either.”

  “In a good way?”

  “Yeah. Because the truth is, I’m not opposed to marriage or kids the traditional way if it happened. I’m just not looking for it. I’ve got other things on my plate. But it’s nice to know you aren’t judging me on my thoughts either.”

  “I’m not. And we are really talking in the future when all I care about right now is getting this house packed up, stripping you naked, and then moving into my new house tomorrow.”

  “I can get on board with that,” she said.

  When she moved out of his arms again to turn into the kitchen he found the most irresistible urge to slap her ass. He couldn’t even hold back. She yelped and turned. “That’s not possessive,” he said. “That’s just me not being able to keep my hands off of you.”

  She narrowed her eyes, a smirk on her face, and he had a feeling they weren’t going to get any packing done. “Take your clothes off.”

  “What?”

  “You heard me. Take your clothes off. Packing can wait. If you’re going to tell me things like that then you are going to have to show me you really mean it.”

  “There are boxes everywhere,” he halfheartedly argued.

  “We had sex for the first time on a shower bench in an empty house. This place is a gold mine of opportunity compared to that and you know it.”

  “I suppose we could do it one last time before the new owners take it over.”

  And the truth is, he had to change their train of thought after that serious conversation.

  He pulled his shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor, then went for the button of his shorts while he toed his sneakers off.

  She moved toward him, put her hands on his chest and gave him a bit of a shove in the direction of the couch until his knees hit the back and he was forced to sit.

  “I’m going to show you possessiveness.”

  “Don’t hurt me.”

  “I want to say you won’t feel a thing, but I know you will. That’s the plan. It just won’t be painful.”

  He wasn’t so sure about that when her mouth lowered over his dick, her nails running up his inner thighs, then cupping his balls.

  She started to bob her head up and down, taking him deep, sucking and then releasing, licking. He started to think he might be a Popsicle on a hot summer day with the way she was going and not leaving any part of him untouched.

  “Brina,” he said, his teeth clenched.

  She lifted her eyes up but kept going. He figured that was answer enough and didn’t say another word.

  Her hand covered him as her mouth moved out of the way, her lips just over the tip, the most sensitive part of him.

  She was stroking up and down, her tongue licked around the dew pebbling out, then she closed over him again and his hips bucked up sending himself deep in her mouth, almost down her throat and she swallowed everything he had to give her.

  He felt her pull away but couldn’t see her because his eyes were closed while he tried to gather his breath. “Condoms packed up or in a bedside drawer?” she asked.

  “Drawer,” he said back, knowing he couldn’t move.

  He stayed there with his eyes closed for a minute wondering what she was doing or what was taking so long.

  He opened them when she came back, but she was now naked in front of him, her hands behind her back.

  “Close your eyes again,” she said.

  Why not? The last time proved worth it.

  He felt her slide onto his thighs, then pick his hand up and put it on her lap, his other next to it. “Keep them closed,” she told him.

  “I will.”

  Then he felt something cold close over his wrists moments before the click. She’d handcuffed his hands in front of him. “Now this is going to be fun.”

  “I can’t do much like this.”

  “Exactly,” she said. “Stay just like that.”

  She picked up the condom, opened it, rolled it on him, and moved his hands over her head and behind her back pretty much locking her in close to him.

  Then she lifted her hips and lowered herself onto his already hard cock again.

  “Has this been a little fantasy of yours?” he asked.

  “Nope. I just saw them in the drawer next to your gun and thought it’d be exciting. We said we were all about fun and you were sorry packing wasn’t. I decided to put something entertaining in before we got to work.”

  He snorted over her “entertaining” comment. “This is fun,” he said as she rose up and down. He couldn’t do much other than sit back and enjoy with his hands cuffed in front of him.

  “It’s more than fun. You don’t feel weak being locked up like that?”

  He laughed. “Sweetie, I could pick you up and get away from you like this and get to my key before you could stop me. This isn’t weak. This is sexy. How about I get to use them on you next?”

  Her eyes turned a lighter shade of blue, her pupils dilated. “I might let you do that. Maybe lock me to your bed one night. Oh man, the things we could do.”

  Her breathing was coming in short and fast as she talked. “That turns you on just thinking about it, doesn’t it?”

  “It does. Having you inside of me helps too.”

  “Glad to be of help,” he said. She stopped moving and started to squeeze him tight with her inner muscles and he thought for sure his eyes were going to cross.

  “I guess I’m not so weak either, am I?” she asked, knowing she had some control of him. He wouldn’t admit she had a hell of a lot more than what she was doing right now.

  “There isn’t one weak part of you. I’ve always known that,” he said.

  “Good. I like strong confident men. I guess my biggest problem is I never ended up with them. But being with you makes me realize I can almost let my guard down...if I wanted to.”

  Which was another thing that made him feel strong and powerful. “I’d never hurt you, Brina. You need to know that.”

  “No one wants to hurt another person, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen.”

  Which meant her ex did one hell of a number on her that she wasn’t saying or confessing to. “Stop talking and just show me the power you like having.”

  “I love that you are okay giving it over to me.”

  “If any man wasn’t okay with this then he wasn’t a man,” he said letting out a laugh.

  Her mouth closed over his, she got on her knees and just started to ride him like he was a bucking bronco. He was slamming up and meeting her, the two of them racing to an end of the game she started.

  In his mind, neither wanted to be the winner, but they could cross the finish line at the same time.

  And when they did, when he was throbbing so hard, and he felt her muscles constricting around him, he knew beyond a doubt that all those things he wasn’t looking for in life might be sitting on his lap right now.

  19

  Just Payback

  “I’ll be back in about twenty minutes,” Nathan said, then leaned down to kiss her.

  “Are you sure you don’t want me to bring you to get the moving truck?” she asked. She almost didn’t want this weekend to end.

  She’d had a rollercoaster of emotions in the past twelve hours. Between their serious conversation, to the explosive sex on the couch, then the laughter while she got to the key before him and then made him chase her naked around the house to get it.

  He was right, he got to her pretty fast and had her on her back on the floor tickling her enough that she was begging for mercy and handing the key over for him to uncuff himself.

  Then they packed up his kitchen together after she’d run to get some subs. When everything was finished, they fell into an exhausted slumber on his mattress that was on the floor.

  Now it was barely eight in the morning and he was going to get the moving truck.

  “Nope. This way I can bring it back later this afternoon and drive my truck to the new house. I shouldn’t have to come back here again other than to sweep and mop the floors, even just wash the counters down.”

  “Why don’t I do that while you and Josh are moving everything out of the truck. It won’t take long and then you won’t have to come back to do anything other than look things over after I lock up.”

  “I can’t ask you to do that,” he said.

  “You didn’t ask. I offered. I’m sure I’ll be in the way with you two carrying things in. Most of it is probably going to sit in the empty rooms or your garage.”

  “That’s true. Plus I’d like to put my own clothes away,” he said, laughing at her.

  “Trust me. I don’t want to do it. I’ve seen how you put things in the closet and you wouldn’t like the way I organized.”

  “Probably not. Josh should be here before nine, but I’ll be back before then. Ruby is dropping him off on her way to a showing. If he shows up, just let him in. You’ve met before.”

  “Does he know I’m here?” she asked.

  “No, but it doesn’t matter.”

  “Does he know we are dating?”

  “I’m pretty private about my life.”

  “Which means no one knows about me?”

  Why was she so annoyed over hearing that? Why was she making such a big deal about things when she’d been saying all along she only wanted fun?

  Yet did she really want no more than that with him?

  She wasn’t so sure what she wanted anymore after their talk last night. After finding out he was nothing like she’d been exposed to with other men.

  After finding someone that maybe could accept her the way she was.

  And why did her heart race so much when he’d talked about three years in the future? Or having a child with him?

  Thoughts that she didn’t need right now or didn’t have time for.

  “He’s going to know today,” he said, smiling at her. “It’s not like I’m hiding you in the closet.”

  “That’s true.”

  “Do your friends or family know about me?”

  “My family does,” she said. “Blair saw my car at your place that first time.”

  “So you didn’t volunteer the information but were more or less caught?”

  He had her there. “Sort of. Then she asked some more and, well, it’s hard to hide when she’s seen me there. And she talks, so everyone in the family knows.” And shit, didn’t Blair make a comment about handcuffs in her dream? She was starting to get freaked out over that.

  “But again, not from your mouth to start it?”

  “No. And fine. I get where you are going with this. But everyone knows and now your friend will too.”

  “That’s right, he will. And I need to go. I’ll bring you back a coffee.”

  “Please do,” she said and then slapped his ass when he turned to leave. “Just payback.”

  “I didn’t know you’d have other help,” Josh said to Nathan when they were driving the moving truck to Paradise Place.

  “She wanted to help me lift the couch before you got there. I told her to cut the shit.”

  Josh laughed. “Ruby is like that too. Nothing wrong with independent women.”

  “No, I’m finding there isn’t.”

  “So you’ve been dating?” Josh asked.

  “Yeah,” Nathan said back. “Problem with it?”

  “No. You’ve never said a word.”

  “I don’t blab about my life like Mick does.”

  “That’s very true,” Josh said back. “I wonder if Allison is that much of a nag or Mick exaggerates.”

  “I don’t know if I even want to know. I can never figure him out.”

  “And no more talk of him or women in general. You don’t have nearly as much stuff as I thought you did.”

  “No,” he said. “I’m used to moving a lot. I live pretty light.”

  “It’s a good thing you aren’t going to stay here. You’d have to buy a lot more furniture for the place.”