“It takes time to learn, but if you are willing it’s worth it in the end.”

  “So why not just go into construction?” Dean asked. Dean was the most talkative of the group that was there today. Or in terms of asking personal questions. He supposed it was being the youngest of the group.

  “The men in our family are in law enforcement,” he said without thought.

  “Your brother is a trooper. Was your father?”

  “My father is a captain for Glens Falls PD.”

  “So it was expected?” Dean asked as they pulled out of the development.

  “I guess. I suppose it’s what I always wanted too. I went into the Army first, then got here and started right up.”

  “I didn’t know you were in the Army.”

  Too late Nathan found himself saying more than he normally did. “Not much to say. I did a few tours and decided to come home. I never thought it’d be a career for me.”

  No, it’d been an escape. One that he found didn’t work as well as he would have liked.

  The rest of the fifteen-minute drive was spent talking about shop and nothing personal after Nathan changed the subject. When he got in his house he went right to the bathroom, stripped, and jumped in the shower.

  He’d had the air conditioning on in the house while they demo’d everything, but with the windows opened and walking in and out of doors it hadn’t been much help. Just enough to take the edge of the heat off a touch.

  Once he was cleaned and in a pair of shorts, he grabbed a beer and plopped down on his sectional, snagging the remote. He knew there wasn’t much on TV, but he needed to chill.

  Most of the guys were complaining how sore they were going to be tomorrow, but not him. He was used to working himself to the bone for all his waking hours.

  When his beer was halfway gone, he’d heard his phone go off and figured it was just his father or Dylan verifying their time tomorrow. Or reminding him it was Cassie’s birthday.

  He didn’t need the reminding. He worked as hard as he had today to push it from his mind...hoping some physical pain would dull the emotional one.

  It never did.

  The biggest shock was the message though. It wasn’t his father or Dylan, but Brina asking if he got everything done he wanted today.

  He thought of the house. He thought of them exchanging numbers. And he thought of seeing her again.

  I did. There is only one thing left.

  What’s that? she asked back.

  Setting up a time to take you to dinner.

  The bubbles were flashing as he waited for her to reply back. It seems you’ve got two full- time jobs. Pick a time and I’ll try to make it work.

  He smiled. Tomorrow night.

  Text me details when you’ve got them.

  Will do. He tossed his phone next to him and picked his beer up. He knew his father and brother wouldn’t stay long. They’d walk around the house. They’d work out some plans. They’d say a few things about Cassie so they weren’t alone and could remember her together and then they’d be on their way.

  It was their routine, and as much as Nathan hated it, he always did it for them. They needed it and he’d do anything for his family while he tried to absolve the guilt of not being there for Cassie when she needed him.

  Why he never saw the signs.

  He was the older brother and it was his job to watch out for her. To make sure she was fine.

  He’d failed and he’d never be able to forgive himself for that.

  9

  A Curse and A Blessing

  Brina didn’t know what possessed her to send that text to Nathan.

  She’d spent the day at Blair’s with her sister and Livi. Philip had come over a little later and she’d witnessed how much love was between the newly engaged couple.

  No, she wasn’t romantic. She gave up on that years ago.

  But maybe she was a tad bit lonely. And wouldn’t it be nice to just have someone she could go out on a few dates with now and again? Nothing had to come of it. She wasn’t thinking of white roses, gowns, and diamond rings.

  She’d rather just have a hot body cuddled up to hers now and again.

  It’d been way too long since she’d had that.

  The text to Nathan had been testing the waters. Nothing more than that.

  He didn’t need to respond. She actually didn’t expect him to, at least not right away.

  She wouldn’t deny she was thrilled he did and that he asked her out.

  Of course, here she was nervous for some reason. They were just meeting at a restaurant in an hour. He’d texted about two hours ago and said he’d be done soon, he only needed to go home and shower and change.

  She’d showered herself and done her hair and makeup a few minutes ago and now she was trying to figure out what the heck she was going to wear.

  It was over ninety outside and she wanted to be comfortable. They were going somewhere that had outdoor seating and she had no idea if he’d want that or not. She was open for anything, but didn’t want to look like she’d finished two hours at the gym by the time the date was over.

  She finally settled on a sleeveless sundress. It wasn’t something she’d wear to work; it was definitely a weekend or night thing. A pair of thong sandals would dress it down enough to be casual.

  As an afterthought, she pulled her hair back and shoved it into a messy bun on her head. She twisted and turned in the mirror and realized she looked pretty damn good. Not so much like a stuffy lawyer.

  She didn’t want Nathan to see her as her profession and felt she’d accomplished it.

  She pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant behind a big silver truck and ended up parking two down from it. She shouldn’t have been shocked to see Nathan step out of it.

  “Good timing,” she said.

  “You look nice.”

  Still no smile on his face, but there was a little bit of lightness in his eyes, even if there might be a touch of sadness too. Or maybe it was tiredness.

  She had to stop trying to analyze it.

  “Thank you,” she said. “I know they have outdoor seating and I wasn’t sure what you wanted to do.”

  “Indoor if you’re okay with it. Or if there are any available. I’ve been sweating my ass off all day so I’d like to cool down a little.”

  She was heating up herself looking at him. Short hair, strong features, light brown eyes looking her over from head to toe. A nice snug navy T-shirt and gray cargo shorts with sneakers.

  “I’m pretty flexible,” she said.

  He smirked. “Said no lawyer ever.”

  She let out a little laugh. “I’m not on the clock tonight. How about you?”

  “No.”

  They were shown a booth in the back that suited her just fine. It gave them a bit of privacy to talk and relax. “So I’m guessing you worked on your house today.”

  “I did. My father and brother came to town and we walked through it together. They are both handy but don’t do the work like me. My brother isn’t disciplined enough. His words, not mine.”

  “What does your brother do?”

  “Dylan is a trooper too. He’s stationed in Queensbury. He tinkers on the side but really just likes to go out and have fun. He has no desire to work another job.”

  “It’s not like being a trooper pays bad,” she said. “Are you just one of those people that can’t sit still?”

  “I don’t know if it’s that. I’m just used to always running.”

  “Then the answer is yes, you can’t sit still. So just you and your brother? Or do you have any other siblings? What do your parents do?”

  “Curious or nosy?”

  “Am I mistaken this is a date? Maybe I’m rusty, but I thought that is what people asked when they get to know each other more. Or am I jumping the gun here?”

  “What are you looking for?” he asked.

  “Nothing serious. A distraction from life maybe? A friendly face to have some fun with. My job is my life. I love what I do. I love helping people and it takes priority for me. But it’s been pointed out I don’t have much of a personal life. I’m not looking for fairytales, princes, or castles.”

  He laughed this time and his face softened just a touch. “Good to know. I suppose that is exactly what I’m looking for too. We seem to be on the same page. My father is a captain with the Glens Fall PD. My mother works in sales, at least last I knew. I had a sister, Cassie, but she passed away.”

  “I’m sorry,” she said, reaching her hand forward. There was that sadness she thought she’d seen earlier when he mentioned his sister. “I’ve got a sister too. Hannah. She’s two years younger than me. My parents are married still, my mother is a teacher and my father works for the state. Don’t ask me what he does, I’m not even sure.”

  “It was a long time ago,” he said. “It’s never forgotten though.”

  “Can I ask what happened? Or is that too personal for what we might be getting into? If we get into anything because here I am jumping the gun again over one date.”

  Nathan shouldn’t have been shocked they were getting into this so fast. Didn’t all lawyers always find a way to get what they wanted at some point? Some just faster than others.

  Though he had to tell himself Brina wasn’t like other lawyers he’d come in contact with before.

  “It’s fine. She committed suicide when she was thirteen. It was my senior year of high school. Dylan, my brother, was a sophomore. I graduated and enlisted in the Army.”

  “So young,” Brina said, her eyes getting a little glossy.

  It was better than hearing things like “What a waste” or “Nothing should be that bad” or “Didn’t anyone see the signs?” His family had heard it all and were sick of it.

  “She was. She was being bullied.”

  There was a fire that just lit in Brina’s eyes. “I feel like I’m going to be sick hearing that.”

  The waitress came over and took their drink and food orders. He needed the beer more desperately than he thought he would. Brina ordered one too.

  The day with his father and brother was longer than he wanted it to be.

  They both came over with forced smiles on their faces. His father had three vanilla cupcakes with white frosting he’d picked up somewhere. It was Cassie’s favorite and every year on her birthday—or as soon as the three of them could get together—they had a cupcake in her honor. Fourteen years didn’t change the routine and it didn’t make it any easier for him either.

  “That’s how we all felt too. I guess we should have seen what was going on, but we didn’t. The internet makes things a lot harder to discover when it comes to bullying. Back then cyberbullying was just starting and not as easily caught or identified. It’s much more magnified now than people whispering behind someone’s back.”

  “What was she being bullied about or for? I hope the kids doing it paid the price.”

  He snorted. “She was different than most her age. So happy, so sweet. She saw the good in everyone. She was kind of naive and wanted to be liked.”

  “Which means some girls or boys would take advantage of that,” she said.

  “Yes. It was middle school, which is a hard age. There was a group of girls that just went around targeting different ones for no specific reason other than they got off on it. She thought they all liked her but behind her back they were starting rumors about her. Nothing that was true, but everyone just jumped on it. There were so many things said about her or to her.”

  He couldn’t keep track. By the time everyone realized it was worse than normal catty girls, it was too late.

  “Middle school was the worst few years of my life,” she said.

  “I think most would agree. Anyway, one night when everyone was in bed, she took a handful of my mother’s sleeping pills and chased them with a half a bottle of vodka. She went to sleep and never woke up. We were all in the house and didn’t know.”

  Which would haunt him until the day he took his last breath. The only person who never blamed herself was his mother, who didn’t even notice her pills were missing that night when she went to bed.

  His father never blamed his mother, but she had no problem saying that he, his father, or Dylan should have seen it. That us boys were kids and knew the signs. That his father should have seen it as a law enforcement officer.

  But his mother, the one who was closest to Cassie as the other female in the house, didn’t see it and didn’t think twice with the bottle missing next to her toothbrush that night.

  “That’s so awful. I don’t know how you move on from that,” she said.

  “You don’t,” he said. “Not like you think.”

  “What happened to those kids that were bullying her?”

  “Nothing,” he said. “Cassie left a note. She wrote it all out. Once things settled down, my parents went to the school, to the principal, to the counselors. They even went to the board of education. The parents were all called in of the kids that were named, but when it was all said and done, nothing happened.”

  “They would have said it was Cassie’s word or interpretation of things, right?”

  “That’s what all the lawyers said.”

  “And you have a horrible opinion of lawyers, don’t you? Why are you out with me then?”

  “My opinion of lawyers is way down on the bottom of the barrel with the sludge leftover from thirty-day-old milk sitting out in the sun. But you, you aren’t like other lawyers, are you?”

  “No,” she said. “A curse and a blessing.”

  He smiled. “A curse because it might hinder your career in some people’s eyes. A blessing for me or we wouldn’t even have gotten to this dinner.”

  10

  Day By Day

  “Dinner was good,” Brina said when they were in the parking lot.

  “Sorry about the depressing conversation starter,” he said. “You handled it like a champ. After half the words were out of my mouth I thought for sure you were going to sneak to the bathroom and not return.”

  “I’ve never snuck out on a date before. I’m stronger than that. I’ve got a sharp tongue and have no problem giving someone crap if they get on my nerves. I noticed when you got out of your truck you seemed sad. Something had to have caused it.”

  “Here I was all proud of myself for changing the subject at dinner to anything other than our families.”

  He had maneuvered everything to current events, local entertainment, even what he was going to do with his house. She’d taken the hint and steered away herself not wanting to ruin what she was hoping would have been a good date.

  She reached for his hand and patted it again. “You did a good job. My guess is you are pretty flexible when it comes to getting out of awkward or slippery situations.”

  “I’m not sure about that. But yesterday was Cassie’s birthday. My father, brother, and I always have a cupcake to celebrate it as if she were still here. Then we don’t talk about it again until the following year.”

  She wasn’t sure that was healthy but knew not to say that either. It wasn’t her business. Each person dealt with crisis or emotions their own way.

  “Then it’s been a pretty taxing weekend for you. All that work on your house and then this with your family. We could have done dinner another time.”

  “No. I needed it. I wanted to see you again.”

  “Why?” she asked. Call her selfish, but she wanted to feel good about this date and wasn’t sure what she felt at the moment.

  “I guess I needed to know if you were what I really thought?”

  “And what is that?”

  “Different but like me at the same time.”

  “That we both go for the underdog. That we both know right and wrong and want to see those pay that are wrong and those be rewarded that are right?”

  “Yeah,” he said, his hand going into her hair. “And you were right so do I get to reward you?”

  “I was hoping you would,” she said just before his mouth touched hers. Before his tongue nudged her lips open and slid in. She clung to him as his mouth moved over hers with a skill and precision of someone who knew exactly what he was doing and what he wanted in life.

  She liked confident men like that. She had to say she liked just about everything about Nathan Randal.

  Her hands slid up his back, and she wished they weren’t in a parking lot so she could get her fingers under his shirt and feel those muscles that were teasing her.

  When he lifted his head, most of the sadness was gone and he was even smiling.

  “Wow,” she said.

  “What was that for?” he asked.

  “Aside from the fact you sure know how to kiss, you should smile more often.”

  He laughed. “I’ve never been one that smiled often.”

  “You did when you gave me my ticket. Or you gave me somewhat of a grin or smirk. Other than that you haven’t really. Did you think it was funny to make me late for court?”

  He stepped back and leaned against his truck. “No. I thought it was funny that you didn’t even try to talk yourself out of the ticket. You had everything ready to hand over like you wanted me to get my ass in gear. It made me laugh.”

  “That is exactly what I was thinking.”

  “I guess I know you pretty well.”

  “Then what am I thinking right now?” she asked.

  “You’re wishing we weren’t in a public place.”

  She poked him in the arm. “That’s you wishing it.”

  “But you didn’t deny it either.”

  She felt her face flush and it didn’t have anything to do with the heat in the parking lot. “I don’t lie. But I’m not admitting that.”

  He laughed. “What’s your schedule look like this week?”

  “Are you asking me on another date? You aren’t even going to make me go home and stare at my phone wondering if it was going to ring or not?”

  “I don’t play those games. If you’d rather not, then tell me so and we can both go on our merry way.”