“Both are very good ideas, but unlikely to happen. Sorry I couldn't take you over to the big island today to get that hair straightening thing. It took so long to round up all those characters that it got too late. I have to take out some customers on a fishing trip tomorrow morning, but I'd be glad to take you there in the afternoon.”

  “That would be great,” I said. “I have to hide out from the Ringo Team anyhow. Harlan Ringo wants to sell me a time share.”

  “Harlan Ringo wants to sell everyone a time share. By the way, your hair looks good the way it is. Are you sure you want to straighten it?”

  “Yes, I need to look like a serious adult to get a good job. Curly hair in a pony tail isn't the right image.”

  “Don't you think an employer is just looking for someone who can do the job they need to fill? I'd hire you in a minute if you could filet a fish on a moving boat so I don't have to do it.”

  “Why do you have to filet a fish on a moving boat? Can't you just wait till you're back on shore?”

  “I'd prefer to, but when I take people out on an all day fishing trip they like to eat some of their catch for lunch. The boat has a little 18 inch grill and cutting board built in, so either Brody or I cook up some of the fish while we're out there. He's better at it than I am, which means he cuts himself less often than I do. Dr. Brad wasn't joking about stitching me up a few times.”

  “No offense, but I don't think I'll be applying for that job.”

  “None taken. So did your Aunt Sam tell you what Brent Maxwell's big announcements are going to be?”

  “No, I don't think she knows,” I replied. “I can only hope that he's announcing that they're all leaving right away.”

  “Too good to be true. They usually stay for a month. Can you pass the garlic butter sauce?”

  Gavin Maxwell got to up get seconds from the buffet and passed by our table. “Well, if it isn't Johnny Bravo, the beach bum,” he said.

  Nick didn't even look up, but said, “And if it isn't Gavin Maxwell, the just plain bum.”

  Gavin glared at Nick but went past without another word.

  “It looks like you and Gavin aren't exactly bosom buddies,” I said. “Have you had problems with him before?”

  “Not really,” Nick said. “Last year he tried to take my motorcycle out for a joyride. A drunk and a motorcycle seemed like a bad combination, particularly when it was my motorcycle, so I convinced him not to try it.”

  “And by 'convinced him' you mean...”

  “I punched him.”

  “Good for you,. He seems like a total jerk.”

  “Oh well, having Brent Maxwell for a father probably made him more screwed up than a power drill. Or maybe he tried reading his dad's books.”

  “That would explain all the drinking.”

  Just then I heard the sound of a fork tapping on a glass, and I saw Brent Maxwell standing up at his table and beckoning for everyone's attention. “Okay folks, I've held you in suspense long enough!” he said. “I told you that I've got a couple of big surprises in store for you, and it's time to reveal the first one! Harlan, give me a hand with this, my friend!”

  Harlan Ringo got up from the table and walked with Brent to the the table covered by the sheet. “Now, this will be no surprise to Harlan- ready, old boy?”

  “Ready when you are, Brent!”

  “Okay, on three! One, two... three!”

  They swept the sheet off the table with a dramatic gesture, revealing a scale model of what looked like a grand mansion flanked by two smaller buildings.

  “Ladies and gentlemen,” Brent announced, “allow my to introduce to you... Silvernose! My very own estate right here on Admiral Archibald Falls dedicated to the man responsible for my success, Dirk Nightshade! That's right, I've bought a terrific plot of beachfront land and I'm having a state-of-the-art complex built there. In the center is this little shack where I'll live in my retirement....” He paused for polite laughter at his joke. “And the building on this side of my house will be the Dirk Nightshade Museum and Library; a hall dedicated to the greatest name in spy fiction! It will hold first editions of all the books in the Dirk Nightshade series along with a life-sized statue of me, your humble author, as well as several pieces of art work depicting my life from the earliest years up until this time.

  “Now, in this building on the other side I am proud to announce the Brent Maxwell Theater. Not only have I commissioned a film company to do an extensive documentary of my life, but I'm also in talks with a major movie producer who wants to bring Dirk Nightshade to the silver screen!”

  Several guests began clapping, led by Charles Gleason who stood up and said, “It's about time!”

  “Way to go, Brent! We can't wait!” Harlan chimed in. Gavin sighed loudly and rolled his eyes.

  Brent Maxwell beamed proudly and held up his hands for silence. “Thank you, thank you! But there's more; in addition to being my home, the mansion will also be the new headquarters of Brent Maxwell Enterprises. The offices in New York will be closed and all business will be conducted from a suite of offices here at the estate.”

  “You surely don't mean that you expect Kristi and me to live in the house with you?” asked Vanessa.

  “Of course not,” Brent replied. “You can find suitable accommodations here on the island just like you do in Manhattan. Gavin can do the same.”

  “If you think I'm going to live on this crappy island, you're dumber than I thought,” Gavin snapped. “I'll send you the bill for my apartment in New York.”

  “I won't be paying for anything but my estate here, son, so you'll just have to get used to it,” Brent said. “Now friends, we won't have to wait longer for this vision to become reality; contracts have already been signed, all plans finalized and building is set to begin within the week. This is not only a great day for me, but a great day for all of us! I think the Mayor would agree that a famous attraction like this estate will bring in tourists from across the globe to our little island, and the whole state will benefit!”

  Mayor Croaker held up her petition gleefully. “The bridge is as good as a done deal!” she said.

  Just then I heard Dodie's voice shouting from the kitchen, “Stop, Caleb! You can't go back there!”

  “The hell I can't!” A stocky man with a grizzled gray beard and a weathered captain's hat stormed onto the patio, pointed at Brent and growled, “Brent Maxwell, prepare to die!!”

  Chapter 3

  “Get out of here, Caleb!” Harlan Ringo snapped, jumping to his feet. “You've got no right to-”

  “You ain't takin' my land, you son of a bitch! I'll see you in hell first!” the old man shouted, shaking his fist in the air.

  “Calm down, everyone, “Brent Maxwell said. “I'm sure we can talk this all out-”

  But he was wrong. The man punched him right in the nose, knocking him to the floor. Then, before anyone could stop him, he rushed to the table where the model of Brent's estate sat, and overturned it in a rage. “You ain't building nothing on my property!” he yelled. “I'll burn it down with you inside!”

  Sheriff Landon and her husband were the first to reach the old man, and they each grabbed one of his arms and wrestled him away from the table. “Ha! He got you good! He good you good!” Gavin laughed.

  “Sheriff! Do your duty and arrest this criminal!” Mayor Croaker shrieked.

  “It's not your land anymore!” Harlan Ringo cried. “You haven't paid rent in a year! I gave you plenty of warnings about what was gonna happen!”

  “Come on, Caleb,” said Sheriff Landon as she led the man away. “You can sleep it off in a nice jail cell tonight where you can't get yourself into any more trouble.”

  “Yeah, well I'll tell you all something!” Caleb hollered. “I'll kill anyone who steps foot on my property and that ain't a warning, that's a promise!”

  The Landons dragged the old man off around the side of the house while Harlan and Charles helped Brent Maxwell to his feet. “Oh, I do apologize!” Mayor Croaker said, dusting off Brent's clothes with her petition papers. “I assure you, Admiral Archibald Falls does not put up with that kind of deplorable behavior! He will be punished to the fullest extend of the law, I'm sure! Are you injured? I'll call an ambulance at once!”

  “No, I'm fine!” Brent snapped, brushing the mayor's hands away irritably. He felt his nose and winced. “I'll just go to the washroom and see if I'm bleeding.”

  “Of course; it's right at the end of the hallway,” Aunt Sam said. “I'll show you-”

  “I know the way!”

  “Let me assist you!” the mayor said. “I was the first one in my girl scout troop to receive a first-aid badge-”

  “No, thank you! Charlie, come along and give me a hand.”

  “Me?” Charles Gleason asked, looking around as if there were other Charlies in the area.

  “Yes, you! I want to have a chat with you anyway,” Brent said as he stalked inside.

  As Charles went to follow him, Mayor Croaker took him by the arm and said, “I do hope Mr. Maxwell doesn't intend to hold Admiral Archibald Falls legally responsible for the actions of this clearly deranged individual who was swiftly brought to justice by-”

  “Yes, yes, don't worry,” Charles muttered, extracting his arm from her grip and hurrying inside.

  The rest of the guests stood in awkward silence, exchanging worried glances. I felt something poke my arm. It was Nick, who hadn't moved from his chair during the whole incident.

  “Hey, are you going to finish those crab legs on your plate or can I have them?” he asked.

  “Who was that guy?” I asked.

  “Caleb Swanson,” Nick said as he helped himself to the crab legs, “better known around here as Captain Caleb. He moved here from Iowa a few years back.”

  “From Iowa? How did he become a ship captain in Iowa?”

  “Oh, he's not really a captain. I think he was an air conditioner repairman or something like that. From what I understand he was dating a woman from his lodge and then he dumped her to elope with her 22 year old daughter. The woman threatened to make her daughter a widow if she caught up with Caleb, so they fled down here to get away from her. The marriage lasted about 8 months before the young bride got fed up with Caleb's laziness and drinking, and kicked him out. Now he lives in a trailer and goes around in a captain's cap telling tourists a bunch of stories that he made up about his adventures at sea and seeing if he can bum drinks off them. Several artists have even paid him to let them paint his picture.”

  “Then what's his beef with Brent Maxwell? Something about his land?”

  “Caleb's got a big plot of land with his trailer on it over on the other side of the island. It sounds like Harlan Ringo got a lucrative offer from Brent Maxwell for the land, and Caleb's way behind on his rent, no surprise, so I guess Harlan evicted Caleb and sold the land to Brent.”

  I saw Aunt Sam beckoning for me to come over. “Excuse me, got to go,” I said.

  “I'll finish your shrimp so they don't get cold,” Nick said.

  When I reached Aunt Sam she took me aside and said quietly, “Teri, do me a favor and go get more sangria for the guests. I think everyone could use another drink about now.”

  “I think you're right,” I said. I slipped inside and went back to the kitchen. I found Dodie at the counter, muttering angrily to herself as she mixed fruit for the sangria. “I tried to stop that fool from going back there,” she said, “but he was too mad and too drunk to listen.”

  “I don't think anyone could have stopped him,” I said. “Besides, he's gone now and it doesn't seem like Brent was really hurt. I think the biggest danger was that Mayor Croaker might have a heart attack over the prospect of this hurting her bridge plans.”

  “Oh, Marcie Croaker and that bridge! Brody saw her a few days ago outside a pre-school trying to get the parents to sign her petition and she wanted them to put the pre-schoolers' names on there, too. Well, you can go ahead with those drinks while I go in the pantry and get some more crackers for the cheese tray.”

  I picked up the tray of drinks and started making my way slowly down the hall toward the patio when I heard raised voices coming from the library. The door was closed but I could still make out Brent's angry voice.

  “...missing money, jacked up numbers in your expense account---” he was saying.

  The other voice was Charlie Gleason's. “You've got the wrong end of the stick here, Brent,” he said. “We've been friends for years! You know I wouldn't cheat you!”

  “Do you think I'm a fool, Charlie?” Brent shouted. “This isn't just cheating, this is big time embezzlement.”

  “You're just tired and upset right now, buddy! Look, I can explain any questions that you have about your financial records. Let's sit down tomorrow morning and go over everything together. It's all a big mistake!”

  “Is that so? Well, I plan to hire a forensic accountant to go over all my finances and get to the bottom of this, or is that a mistake, too?”

  “Brent, old pal! I mean, of course- only there's really no reason-” Charlie spluttered. “It'll all be a big waste of time! As I said-”

  “It's my time and I'll waste it if I want to, 'old pal'! If there's any evidence of fraud I'll...”

  Just then Dodie came out of the kitchen carrying a tray of crackers and cheese. “Don't tell me they sent the drinks back!” she said when she saw me standing in the hall. “If they don't like them they can drink tap water! The kitchen is closed for tonight!”

  “I didn't take them out yet,” I said. “I, er, had to use the bathroom and--”

  “Hey, have you guys seen BM?” called a voice behind me. It was Dawn, phone in one hand, half-empty glass in the other. “Everyone's still waiting for him to come back out and make his other big announcement or whatever.”

  “Brent is on his way!” said a musical voice from the library. The door opened and Brent stepped out into the hall with a broad smile on his face, followed by Charlie, who was not smiling at all. Brent kissed Dawn on the forehead and said, “Let's follow this lovely young lady with the tray of drinks. I assume she's going back to the party but wherever the alcohol goes, I go!”

  When we got back to the patio, the guests all looked toward Brent nervously, but he grinned and said, “Sangria to the rescue, everyone!” This seemed to ease the tension, but my tray was still emptied in record time.

  As everyone began to drink and chat again, Brent walked to the center of the patio with his arm around Dawn's shoulders and raised his hand for attention. “So far it's been quite a party, eh?” he said after the crowd had been silenced. “Great food, great sangria and big news! (Not to mention a little unplanned martial arts action!)” He paused again for the scattered polite laughter. “But the best is yet to come! I won't leave you in suspense any longer; it's time to make my last and biggest announcement!”

  Brent put his hand in his pocket and drew out a small box, which he opened to reveal a gold ring bearing an enormous diamond. With that, he got down on one knee in front of Dawn and said, “My darling, would you make me the happiest man in the world?”

  “How?” Dawn asked.

  “By marrying me.”

  “Like, now? Like, you wanna get engaged?”

  “Yes, of course. That's why I bought this ring for you.”

  “Oh, okay, sure,” Dawn replied.

  I've heard people sound more excited when they've ordered a cheeseburger and fries at MacDonald's, but I applauded along with everyone else as Brent slid the ring onto Dawn's finger.

  Nick leaned over the table and whispered, “Y'know, I always heard that alcohol destroys brain cells, but I've never seen it in action before.”

  As Brent stood up, the guests gathered around to offer congratulations. “Well done, Brent! Well done!” Harlan Ringo said, pumping his hand vigorously. Mayor Croaker shouldered him aside and took Brent's hand. “Oh, congratulations, Mr. Maxwell,” she gushed. “With you bringing your famous family and business to the island, the Governor is sure to build that bridge from the mainland that we've all been hoping for. And don't worry, I'll be sure to give the credit to you!”

  Charlie clapped Brent on the back and said, “Well, congratulations, old man, and I do mean old! You're just full of surprises tonight! That ring must have cost a bundle; did you put that on your expense account under the heading of personal entertainment?”

  “Shut up, Charlie,” said Brent. “Don't make a bigger fool of yourself than you already are.” He held up his hands again to quiet the guests. “Thank you, thank you all! But, there's more I want to say. Not only is my darling Dawn my soulmate and love of my life, she will also be safeguarding the future of Dirk Nightshade! Now, I know it's a downer to talk about death at a party like this, but we all know no one lives forever, and ol' Brent Maxwell is no exception. I have to put trusted hands on the wheel of the Dirk Nightshade ship to steer it onward after I'm gone, so that's why I've updated my will to leave my new estate, my assets and the rights to my books to the future Mrs. Maxwell!”

  The applause was much quieter this time. Vanessa pushed Dawn aside and took Brent by the arm. “Excuse me, everyone, but I need to have a word with Mr. Maxwell in private,” she said.

  “Can't it wait, Vanessa?” Brent asked. “I'm in the middle of-”

  “No, it can't. Come over here.”

  Vanessa led Brent away from the other guests to the edge of the patio where they could speak in private. Well, in private other than being right next to the table where Nick and I were sitting, but apparently we didn't count.

  “Make it quick, Vanessa,” Brent snapped. “This isn't a good time for one of your lectures.”

  “What the hell is the idea of giving that brainless little bimbo the reins of the business?!” Vanessa hissed. “You said we would talk about it before you made any changes! Do you think I'd work for the likes of her? She's probably never read a book, much less sold one! I've worked hard for years to make you and this business a success and now all of a sudden you give it all to that idiot?! No way in hell, Brent! I won't stand for it!”