They split off, and he stepped out the french doors to the back. She set her purse on the kitchen table then went back to the laundry room. Music played somewhere in the house. Likely Avery’s room, but Ryleigh wouldn’t go see. She found some disinfecting wipes and headed out the same door Finn had gone through.

  The fenced backyard was wide and flat and had a concrete patio with a dining set and grill. A wooden play structure had been placed near the fence with mulch underneath, and a manicured green lawn filled the rest of the space.

  Finn stood at the gas grill looking very domestic. A sight she never thought she would see, but it was far more attractive than any of the dreams she’d had of this man.

  She doubted she would ever start anything with him again, but she didn’t trust her heart not to betray her and give him a second chance. Especially when they could so easily fall into the personal realm like this.

  Something she had to guard against and focus on what she needed to do. Finding and stopping the bomber before he struck again.

  Finn couldn’t decipher Ryleigh’s mood as she stared at the kitchen cabinet, an odd expression on her face. Looked almost like longing for this lifestyle, but that would be odd. She hadn’t been the settle-down kind of woman when they dated. Made her the perfect woman for him. But seemed as if that might’ve changed. If her anger at the breakup told him anything, anyway.

  She shook her head, then charged outside with a stack of plates and silverware as if needing to get away from him. She set the table with a fury. Almost like she was mad at the dishes. He was tempted to ask what was going on in that pretty head, but no reason to go there until after Avery was fast asleep and couldn’t overhear their discussion.

  He left to grab the burgers and the veggie pack from the refrigerator and to tell Avery he’d started cooking. He found her in her room, sitting at her desk, drumming the beat with her finger on the wood and reading a book.

  “Burgers on the grill for dinner.” He crossed the room to her. “And we’ll eat outside. It’ll all be ready in less than thirty minutes.”

  She peered intently at him. “I like burgers. Mom didn’t know how to grill. I like that you grill.”

  What? A compliment. That was a first. “I’m making them just for you.”

  “Doesn’t she like burgers?”

  Ouch. And a slam. “Ryleigh does too. At least she used to when I knew her before.”

  She scrunched up her face. “Before when?”

  Oops. Maybe shouldn’t have brought that up, but now that he had… “We dated a couple of years ago.”

  Avery’s eyes narrowed. “You gonna go out with her again?”

  “We’re just working together,” he said, doing his best not to reveal that he wanted to date Ryleigh.

  She curled her legs up in her purple swivel chair. “Why did you stop going out?”

  “I had to deploy all the time, and it wasn’t fair to her for me to be gone so much.”

  “I remember that. You would go away, and me and Mom would pray for you all the time.” She remained focused on him. “But you quit that for me.”

  “I did.”

  Avery tilted her head. “How come you didn’t do it for her?”

  Yeah, why didn’t I? His desire to stay with the team. The only explanation, but it sounded so selfish that he couldn’t say it. “Ryleigh’s a grown-up and didn’t need me like you do.”

  Avery blinked up at him. “Don’t grown-ups need other people?”

  “Yes, but not usually for all the basic things like a place to live and food.”

  “And love.” Her vulnerable tone touched him deeply. “We all need love.”

  “Yes, we do.”

  She clutched her book tightly. “I love you, Finn. Please don’t marry her and leave me alone.”

  He squatted by her chair and took her hand. “I’ll never leave you, Peanut. Never.”

  “You pinkie promise?” She held out her little finger.

  He quirked his finger with hers and gave her a reassuring smile. “Pinkie promise.”

  She threw her arms around his neck and held tight. “I hated it when I had to live at that foster home until you got here. I never want to do that again. I don’t want to be alone again.”

  “You never will be.” He only hoped he could keep that promise. He would never let this child down, but he couldn’t do anything to prevent a freak accident. Or a health issue like her mother succumbed to.

  He leaned back and brushed her hair from her face. “Want to help me cook the burgers?”

  “Okay, but the grill is hot. I could get hurt.”

  The little girl he’d known before her mother died had never been this fearful. He hoped he could bring her security back. “I’ll show you how to stay safe.”

  “Okay.”

  He turned to leave and saw Ryleigh at the door. She stepped forward. “Sorry to interrupt. I just came to tell you a timer is going off in the kitchen.”

  “Means the grill’s ready.” He held out his hand to Avery. “Let’s get those burgers cooking.”

  She gave Ryleigh a triumphant look, then grabbed Finn’s hand and dragged him from the room and past Ryleigh.

  Curious. Avery still saw Ryleigh as competition for his affection. No need. No need at all. He had plenty for both of them, something he was just coming to learn, thanks to Avery. Made his upcoming talk with Ryleigh even more important.

  9

  After dinner when they were relaxing around the table, Ryleigh couldn’t look at Finn without seeing him in Avery’s room. His tender look for the vulnerable child. His gentle explanations. Ryleigh’s heart had melted in so many ways. Seeing the big, tough guy being so loving and soft. The child’s obvious pain at losing her mother. Finn’s hope in making a good life for the broken child.

  Ryleigh wanted to swoop in and hug both of them. To hold them until the big bad world disappeared. Until Avery got over her loss. But Ryleigh couldn’t do a thing to help. In fact, she was a problem. Avery seemed worried Ryleigh was going to steal Finn.

  She wasn’t of course. Was she? Not steal him, but if she was with him for long, she would probably cave and let him back into her life if he asked. Did he even want that?

  “What do you say, Ryleigh?” Finn asked.

  She blinked as she had no idea what they’d been talking about. “What?”

  “Would you like to kick the soccer ball with Avery?” Finn asked.

  “Oh, soccer. Yeah. Sure.”

  “I’ll get the ball.” Avery trudged toward the storage shed as if being forced to participate.

  Ryleigh looked at Finn. “No secret that she doesn’t want to do this.”

  “No, which is odd because she loves soccer. For some reason, she sees you as competition for my affection.”

  Ryleigh needed some clarification. “I’m not putting out that vibe, am I?”

  “Quite the opposite.”

  “Then why?”

  He shrugged. “Who can know the mind of a seven-year-old, especially one who’s living with such a major hurt.”

  Avery came running back, black and white ball in hand. “Got it.”

  Ryleigh took off her boots and socks. She didn’t like the idea of playing barefoot, but she liked it better than wearing boots.

  “You start.” Avery tossed the ball to Ryleigh.

  A goal was set up at the far side of the yard so Ryleigh dropped the ball and moved it down the field and into the goal. She turned to look at Avery. “I thought maybe you would try to block me.”

  She nibbled on her lip. “Is that what you want me to do?”

  “Yeah.” Ryleigh dribbled the ball back to Avery. “It’s more fun to have a challenge.”

  “Okay. Go for it.”

  Ryleigh considered going easy on the child, but that wasn’t fair to either of them. She positioned the ball, and Avery took a defensive stance in front of her. Since Ryleigh had no one to pass it to, she would use a banana kick to curve the ball around Avery and then take control of it again. A banana kick was usually used to make a goal, but she thought it would work well here too.

  She kicked the ball. It did exactly what she hoped, spun, and curved around Avery. The child expected the ball to go straight, so she moved in that direction, but Ryleigh was ready to take control at the true location and drive the ball downfield. As she raced across the yard the blades of grass tickling her bare feet, she heard Avery struggling to catch up. Ryleigh didn’t slack off and fired the ball into the net.

  She turned to gauge the child’s reaction. Ryleigh really hoped Avery understood competition and wouldn’t be crying.

  She wasn’t. She looked up at Ryleigh in awe. “That was amazing. How did you make the ball go that way?”

  “Would you like me to show you how to do a banana kick?”

  “Yes, please!”

  Ryleigh placed the ball on the grass. “Your plant foot is next to the ball. Kicking foot. Toe up. Ankle locked. Hit the outside of the ball.”

  Ryleigh demonstrated slowly without actually kicking the ball hard.

  “I want to try.” Avery’s excitement bubbled from inside.

  Ryleigh stepped back and enjoyed seeing the child’s enthusiasm as she attacked the ball and gave it a pretty good go for her first attempt.

  “That’s a great start,” Ryleigh said. “Just remember to keep your ankle locked.”

  She ran after the ball and tried again.

  “That one was much better,” Ryleigh called out.

  Avery looked up, a big grin on her face. “Wait till they see this at practice. They’re gonna think I’m a pro.”

  “You might want to practice more before unveiling it for your friends. It’s usually used to score a goal, so especially practice it with the net.”

  “I will. Right now.” She stood at the ball and kicked, then looked up. “That was better. Now another one.”

  “Five minutes until bedtime,” Finn called out.

  Avery scowled. “Aw, do I have to? I want Ryleigh to teach me more.”

  “Maybe tomorrow,” Finn said, but he put little confidence behind his words.

  “Okay,” Avery said. “I can get some good practice in five minutes.”

  She turned her attention back to the ball, and Ryleigh jogged over to Finn.

  He leaned back in his chair and smiled. “Looks like the jealousy is gone.”

  “For now, anyway,” Ryleigh said, knowing how fickle a girl can be because she’d once been one herself. She remembered changing with every whim, so yeah, she’d broken through with Avery, but what would happen once the ball went back into the shed?

  For now, Ryleigh enjoyed sitting in the soft night air with Finn and watching the little girl do her best to make that soccer ball curve. She planted her foot, followed through, and the ball flew, then curved into the net.

  Ryleigh came to her feet. “Great job, Avery!”

  “You saw it.” She bolted across the lawn toward them. “Did you see it too, Finn?”

  “I did. It was awesome.” A broad smile crossed his face.

  “I’m gonna do it again.”

  “Sorry, Peanut. Time’s up.”

  “Aw.” She stabbed her toe into the grass, then lifted her shoulders, her joy gone. “I’ll put the ball away.”

  She ran off, and Ryleigh’s heart creased for the little girl. “She was transported beyond losing her mother for a while there and now her loss is back.”

  “Breaks my heart.”

  “Mine too.”

  Avery jogged back and looked at Ryleigh. “Can you tuck me in tonight?”

  Ryleigh worked hard to hide her surprise. “Sure.”

  “Go ahead and get your teeth brushed and your PJs on,” Finn said.

  She skipped into the house.

  “This is so very domestic,” she said to Finn. “I never imagined I’d see you in this role.”

  “Honestly, me either. But God put me here, so I know it’s the right place.”

  Ever practical, but did he really believe it? “And how do you feel about it?”

  He didn’t answer at first just stared at his hands. “I miss the team. Especially when I’m at work. The security job puts food on the table and lets me be home every night for Avery, but it doesn’t challenge me.” He looked into the distance again. “But I’m doing my best to live up to that motto—live with my pain not in it.”

  He was trying for sure, but if she was right, he was failing more often than not. She got that as she really hadn’t wanted to leave the FBI, but her family was more important.

  “Still, you’re in pain just like Avery,” she said. “You have the loss of your friend plus the loss of your life as you knew it. I kinda get that with having left the FBI. I would like a bit more excitement too, but figure I can find that in other areas of my life.”

  “Not me.” He let out a long breath and looked at her. “At least not with dangerous things. I promised Avery I would never do anything to risk my life, so no skydiving or base-jumping or anything like that.”

  “I admire the sacrifice you’re making.” Without a thought, she reached across the table to squeeze his hand, an action that just seemed right and natural between them.

  Heat flared in his eyes as he locked gazes with her. A shot of adrenaline rushed through her. Oh, man. She really did still have feelings for this man. Big time.

  “Ready.” Avery burst out the door, her cute pink pajamas covered with puppy dogs.

  Ryleigh jerked her hand away, the mood evaporating.

  Avery eyed them suspiciously. “Are you two holding hands?”

  “I just rested my hand on Finn’s for support.” Ryleigh stood. “You know like when someone hugs you or rests a hand on your shoulder when you’ve had a tough time.”

  “Like friends or moms do.” Avery’s tone held her usual cautious note.

  “Exactly.” Ryleigh started for the house. “How about that tucking in?”

  “Ready!” Avery’s suspicions vanished, and she cast a sweet smile at Finn, then ran over to him. She kissed him on the cheek. “Night, Finn.”

  His wide-eyed surprise said this hadn’t happened before or if it had, not often.

  Avery grabbed Ryleigh’s hand and dragged her to the bedroom. “Finn is reading me a story. We’re reading Nancy Drew mysteries. They’re my mom’s from when she was a kid. She got them from her mom. They loved ’em.”

  “And do you?”

  “They’re a little bit old, but yeah, because Mom loved them, I do too.” She grabbed a book from her bookshelf and flopped on her bed. “Have you read them?”

  “Yes. Every single one and I liked them too.”

  Avery chewed on her lip. “Do you have a mom?”

  “I do.”

  She dropped the book, The Secret at Shadow Ranch, on her rainbow bedspread. “Mine died. Just like that. One day she was here. Then she was gone. I miss her.”

  “I would miss my mom too.” Ryleigh sat next to Avery. “My cousin recently died, and I miss him a lot.”

  “It hurts.”

  “Yes.”

  “Real bad. Sometimes I just want to go under my covers and never come out.” She picked up her pillow and rested it on her knees.

  Ryleigh sought the right words as the child was opening up, and Ryleigh didn’t want to discourage her by saying the wrong thing. “Have you talked to Finn about it?”

  “Nah.” She pressed her face into her pillow.

  Ryleigh had to swallow down tears that were threatening to spill. “Did you know his mom and dad died when he was ten?”

  Avery’s head popped up. “They did?”

  Ryleigh nodded. “And he totally understands how you feel, and talking to him might help.”

  She squished her eyebrows together. “He didn’t tell me.”

  Maybe Ryleigh shouldn’t have said anything. “He might not want you to feel bad for him while you were already feeling so bad. Plus, he’s not a real big talker. Kind of a silent type of guy.”

  “He’s been trying though. Real hard.” She frowned. “But I’ve been mean to him.”

  “I’m sure he understands.” Ryleigh picked up the book. “A lot of people in our family talked to a counselor when my cousin Thomas died. That helped too.”

  “I’ve been going to see one, but I don’t know what to say to her.”

  “Maybe pretend she’s a friend who wants to help. Like me.”

  “You’re my friend?”

  “Sure thing.”

  She threw her arms around Ryleigh’s neck and held tight. Ryleigh hugged the skinny little girl back.

  “This is a mom hug,” Avery whispered. “Soft and squishy. Not hard and solid like Finn.”

  Ryleigh could see why this child would crave a soft mom hug, and Ryleigh was glad to provide it, but Ryleigh’s craving? One of those hard, solid hugs that Avery took a pass on. Ryleigh had to get a grip or being alone with him tonight could very well be dangerous to her heart.

  10

  Everything was riding on this talk with Ryleigh, and as the sun slowly dipped in the sky, Finn didn’t want to screw it up. But how should he handle it? He’d always struggled to convey the deep-seated attachment to his SEAL team. They were brothers. Even more than brothers. Men he trusted with his life. No questions asked. They had his back and would be there for him. Blood brothers wouldn’t always heed that call. SEAL brothers would never turn away.

  Never.

  Even now that he’d left the team, if he called, they would come running as soon as they could. But the only help he needed was with Avery accepting him. And what could the guys do with her that he hadn’t been able to do?

  They were like him. Used to attacking a problem head on. Find the solution and implement it. Sometimes in seconds. But Avery? She was a take your time and go slow situation. Feel your way as you go. No set plan. No instructions. Nothing a guy could train for. Run ops practices for. All he could do was be patient and take cues from her and pray he wasn’t screwing things up. Screwing her up.

  So far, he was failing. Or at least her response to him had said as much. But the kiss earlier?

  He rested his fingers on his cheek, feeling for the emotion again.