Finn shook hands but stood staring after the older man as he walked away. What had just happened? Ryleigh’s grandad was like night and day. Hot and cold. A chameleon. Unexpected for sure. But Finn would take the warning to heart.

  The investigation might be filled with big fat questions but this one thing was crystal clear—if he couldn’t commit to a future with Ryleigh, then an honorable man would keep his feelings to himself. And he was an honorable man, wasn’t he?

  Ryleigh played a game of Uno at the kitchen island with Avery while Finn finished up the dishes. The silverware clanked as he loaded them in the basket, and the rooms still smelled like her gran’s spaghetti. Ryleigh should focus on the game, but she kept thinking about dinner. She’d enjoyed the meal. Actually, she’d loved having Finn and Avery with her family. And her grandparents had behaved. She didn’t know what her grandad had talked to Finn about at the end, but they both came out smiling, so no big deal, right? If her grandad was true to form, he’d been comparing fishing stories.

  Finn closed and started the dishwasher running. The hum filled the background as he came to the island. “Time for bed, Peanut.”

  “Aw, I don’t want to go to bed yet.” Avery’s lower lip seemed to grow ten sizes.

  Ryleigh smiled at the child. “I’ll read the Nancy Drew book with you.”

  “Okay.” Avery hopped down from the stool and bolted from the room.

  “She admires you.” Finn started to gather the cards together.

  Ryleigh looked at the doorway the child had disappeared through. “I admire her too. I guess it might seem weird to admire a child, but she’s handling one of the toughest things anyone could ever deal with. I don’t know if I could’ve done it when I was her age. Could even do it now.” She faced Finn and found him watching her, a warm smile on his face. “And I admire you for handling it when you were a kid too.”

  He waved a hand. “That was a long time ago.”

  “Still, I know it left scars, and yet you’re able to open your heart to Avery.” She rested her hand on his. “You’re a good man, Finn.”

  He jerked his hand free and busied himself with putting the cards in the box. Okay, what had she said? Done?

  Something had changed during dinner, but what?

  Avery came running into the room in bare feet and pajamas, giving Ryleigh no chance to ask. Avery flew at Finn, and her arms circled as far as she could reach. His face lit with surprise.

  She peered up at him. “I made something for you today.”

  “You did?”

  She stepped back and unfurled her hand to reveal an elastic bracelet made of multi-color beads. “It has my name in it so you don’t forget about me while you’re working.”

  She took his hand and slid the bracelet onto his wrist. The pastel beads looked out of place on the athletic man with a rugged build, but his eyes glistened with unshed tears.

  He knelt and looked her in the eyes. “This is the nicest gift I’ve ever gotten.”

  Avery’s eyes widened. “Really?”

  “Really.” Finn scooped her close for a hug, and a contented smile turned his lips up.

  It was all Ryleigh could do not to leap up to hug the pair and share their joy. But this was their moment. A milestone in their relationship and a very special one. Anything she could say or do would spoil that.

  Avery pulled back and bit her lower lip. “Promise you’ll wear it all the time.”

  “I promise. Except when I shower.”

  “Yeah.” She nodded hard. “You can take it off then. I made a matching one too, but it has your name on it. I’m going to go put it on right now.” She kissed him on the cheek. “Night, Finn.”

  “Night, Peanut.”

  She ran to Ryleigh. “I’m sorry I didn’t make one for you. I didn’t have enough time.”

  “No worries.” Ryleigh smiled. “I loved seeing the one you made for Finn.”

  Avery grabbed Ryleigh’s hand. “Let’s go get my bracelet and read.”

  Ryleigh let Avery lead her to her bedroom.

  Avery retrieved the bracelet from her top dresser drawer and slid it on her wrist. “I think Finn liked it a lot.”

  “I know he did,” Ryleigh said. “And I know he’ll wear it all the time.”

  Avery slid under her covers, and Ryleigh sat on the bed to read the book. Avery snuggled against Ryleigh’s side, and the warmth of the little body pulled at Ryleigh’s heart.

  “I like this.” Avery sighed. “You snuggle better than Finn. Gran does too. More like my mom.”

  Ryleigh thought about her mother and gran. Ryleigh was so blessed to have both women in her life, and she needed to be more thankful for them. Her gran was getting up in years, and Ryleigh had to appreciate her even more before she lost her, and she was only a memory like Avery had of her mother.

  She brushed Avery’s hair from her face. “Mom’s do have a special touch.”

  “But dads are fun,” Avery said. “I don’t know my real dad, but I think Finn’s gonna be a good one.”

  “I think so too.” Ryleigh imagined Avery and Finn’s future together and all the milestones they would share.

  Avery’s first date. Going to college. Getting engaged. Married. Becoming a mom herself.

  Trouble was, Ryleigh appeared in all the images that came to mind, and try as she might, she couldn’t scrub herself out of them.

  She had to get out of that room and clear her head. She returned to the story and read until Avery’s eyes grew heavy.

  Ryleigh closed the book. “Time for lights out.”

  “Aw,” Avery said. “I’m going to miss you when you go home.”

  “I’ll miss you too,” she said and gave Avery a squeeze, then got up. “But for now, I’ll see you in the morning.”

  “Night.” Avery grabbed Ryleigh’s hand, jumped up on the bed to give Ryleigh a butterfly-soft kiss on the cheek.

  Ryleigh hugged the little girl. “That was sweet of you, Avery. Good night.”

  Avery clung to Ryleigh, but she extracted herself from the hug and felt like she might suffocate from all the emotions flowing through her. She rushed down the hall and out through the French doors onto the wide deck that ran the width of the home. She gasped for a deep breath of the cooler night air and leaned on the railing. Fearing a panic attack, she gazed up at the clear night stars sparkling like diamonds tossed into the sky.

  She’d enjoyed dinner and tucking Avery in way too much for her own good. She started imagining meals like this all the time. Her and Finn. And that meant her as a mother. Wow! What a crazy thought to even ponder, much less pull the trigger on. Of course, Finn would have to want that too. Avery as well.

  She didn’t think he would want a relationship. Especially not now when everything was so fresh between him and Avery, and the child was just coming to trust him. No. That was a dream she had to pocket. For now. Maybe forever.

  “You sure bolted.” Finn’s voice came from behind. “Everything okay?”

  She jumped and spun. “You scared me.”

  “Sorry,” he said, searching her face. “Did something happen with Avery?”

  It did. Totally. But Ryleigh couldn’t tell Finn that she was falling for a child and wanted to help take care of her. To help heal the little girl’s heart with all the love Ryleigh’s mother once lavished on her. Because Ryleigh couldn’t be that mother for Avery. Ryleigh could never move here and leave her family. She’d never even considered such a thing.

  Finn’s gaze intensified, locking on hers. Digging. Probing.

  She started to look away, but he took her chin softly in his hand, and his gaze softened into a blush of warmth. “I shouldn’t do this. Told myself I wouldn’t do this. But I can’t help it. Not with the way you look in the moonlight. Captivating.”

  He slid his hand into her hair, cupped the back of her head, and drew her close as he lowered his head. He was going to kiss her. Right now. Right here. She should say no. Stop. But she inched toward him and wound her arms around his neck to pull him even closer. His body was rock solid and unyielding.

  Time stood still. She waited for the touch of his lips. Knew what it would feel like. But it seemed like an eternity before he settled them on hers. She pressed into him. Into the kiss. Gave into the emotions of the past few days. Deepened the kiss and clung to him.

  His arms went around her. Solid, yet he held her like she was fragile at first, then tightened his grip. She reveled in his touch. Wanted this more than anything right now. Wanted him in her life.

  She let go of her worries. Of her fears and just kissed him back as if her life depended on it.

  Her phone rang. Sounding like a mighty gong in the quiet of the night. She startled back to her senses. He jerked back. She took in long breaths. Not wanting the kiss to end, but wanting it to end at the same time.

  She’d seriously fallen for him again. The kiss told her that. Big time.

  She caught her breath and dug her phone from her pocket. “It’s Russ.”

  She expected Finn to look disappointed at the abrupt end to their kiss, but he stepped back and appeared relieved. He hadn’t wanted to kiss her. He’d said as much, but for some reason had given in. Much like her. Fighting the feelings that just wouldn’t let go. Even now as her phone continued to ring.

  She forced her attention to the call and answered. “Russ.”

  “Just thought you’d want to know,” he said. “Sierra sent techs to Eckles’s place to help look for Carla’s phone. They located it right off the bat. Nick is running an image, and then he’ll get the information to us.”

  “Did he say how long it would take?” She stole another long breath, her pulse racing.

  “Couple of hours. So keep an eye out for it and for the call logs from Gates’s phone too.”

  “Will do,” Ryleigh said, then ended the call to tell Finn about it.

  She looked at her watch.

  Eight-thirty.

  “I’m going to my room to rest so I’m fresh when the information arrives.” She didn’t wait for Finn to say anything but took off. Ran away—bolted was more like it.

  She’d probably just lied to Finn. Not intentionally. She would try to rest, but she highly doubted she could sleep with the crazy thoughts that told her to turn around and throw herself into Finn’s arms instead of putting the hunt for a killer first in her mind.

  19

  Finn sang the last line of the song in the small contemporary church he and Avery had been attending. Felicia had been a member here, and Avery was plugged into the children’s ministry. She loved it, another reason why Finn was hesitant to move her. Not that he couldn’t find another great church in another city.

  If they moved to Portland, he liked the church he’d grown up attending, but they’d never transitioned into contemporary worship, which he favored these days. He assumed wherever the Steele family attended had to be great, but didn’t mean it had his favorite form of worship either.

  But moving held another challenge.

  What job would he do? Military personnel often went into law enforcement. He thought he would like being a cop, but could he do the job while being the sole caretaker for Avery?

  Would it be too dangerous? Would the child worry?

  He couldn’t do that to her. Even if he didn’t like the job he ended up with, she took first place. Maybe he should talk to the Maddox brothers about starting his own survival business in Portland. Could he succeed at that? He would have to because, first and foremost, he had to provide for Avery.

  The pastor offered his blessing, and Finn turned to the others who’d joined him this morning. The Maddox brothers and their parents, plus Reid’s daughter Jessie and their cook, Poppy, who also belonged to this church, were there. Finn hadn’t met them as they usually attended the early service. He and Avery came to the later one. Ryleigh and her grandparents had arrived too, and she’d sat with them in the row behind him. The entire visiting Veritas team filled three rows behind everyone.

  For an hour they were able to forget about the crime awaiting them and focus on refreshing their souls. At least that was what Finn had been doing. Now he was ignoring his urge to look at Ryleigh to see if she would give him any hint of how she felt about last night’s kiss. She’d been nothing but professional with him on the ride to church, but was her usual open and warm self with Avery.

  Guess that told him what he needed to know. She might’ve liked the kiss—that wasn’t in question for either of them—but she regretted it just as he did. Nothing honorable about giving in to it. He had to do better. Be the man her grandad expected Finn to be.

  He turned the bracelet on his wrist. At least one thing wasn’t a bust from the night before. He hoped the bracelet meant things would be easier between him and Avery from now on. He could at least say from his side that the moment brought out every protective instinct in him, and he knew he would do anything to keep his little peanut safe and for her to feel loved and cherished for the rest of her life.

  Listen to him, even thinking a word like cherish. Ugh. Not a word that had ever been in his vocabulary, but it was there to stay now.

  Eloise approached him. “Nice bracelet. Avery worked so hard to make it for you, and I’m glad to see you wearing it.”

  He released the beads and smiled. “When a special little seven-year-old offers you a bracelet, you wear it for as long as she wants.”

  “I haven’t spent much time with you, young man, but as soon as I saw that bracelet on your wrist this morning, I knew you were a good man.” Eloise smiled. “Ready for some brunch? Barbie and I have everything ready and in warming dishes in the fellowship hall, so we can serve the whole group.”

  He still couldn’t get used to the fact that Barbara, the Maddox brothers’ mother, was nicknamed Barbie. All he could think of was a Barbie doll. But from what he’d seen so far this morning, the name fit her free-spirited personality far better than Barbara or even Barb would.

  “Thank you for going to all the trouble for us, but we’ll have to eat and scram for a task force meeting,” he said, his mind going to the information Nick had finally provided for the team this morning. Turned out Carla had a tough password on her phone and cracking it had taken longer than Nick had hoped, and he’d worked through the night.

  Eloise waved a hand. “No worries. I live with a family of law enforcement or former law enforcement officers, and I’m used to that.”

  How Avery might have to deal if he took a law enforcement job came to mind. “How did your children handle the worry of their father potentially getting injured on the job?”

  “When they each got old enough, we sat down and had a plain talk. Brought it out in the open and then encouraged them to talk about their feelings whenever they were afraid.” She lifted her shoulders. “Every time the news reported an officer injured or slain it would come up. We didn’t watch the news much in those days.”

  He nodded at her logic.

  Her eyebrows rose over the large blue glasses she wore that morning. “Are you thinking of going into law enforcement?”

  “Maybe in the future, but Avery’s so devastated by losing her mom that I feel like I need to do a desk job so she doesn’t have to worry about losing me.”

  “That is a concern.” Eloise rested her hand on his arm. “I can see how desperate she is for a family, but I think that existed before her mother died. She told me she didn’t know anything about her dad or blood relatives on his side.”

  Finn nodded. “She was conceived on a drunken one-night stand before Felicia came to faith. She doesn’t know much more than the guy’s name was Joe Carlisle, but she never looked him up. Told Avery that he loved her but wasn’t ready to be a dad.”

  “So someday the child will want to find him, and you’ll have to tell her the truth.”

  He nodded. “I’d do it now, but I know she either won’t believe me or won’t be able to handle it on top of losing her mom. But if I wait, will she hold it against me?”

  She tsked. “You have a real predicament there.”

  “What would you do?”

  “Me? Oh, I don’t know. I suppose I’d wait until Avery’s settled in who she is, and then if she mentions her dad, sit her down and tell her the truth.”

  “And hope she doesn’t hate me for keeping it from her.”

  Eloise squeezed his arm and let go. “But here’s the thing, Finn. You didn’t create this problem, and I know you’ll fix it in the best way possible. With God at your side as you do so, it’ll all work out, and all the worry in the world isn’t going to change things.”

  She was right. Of course she was. Worry was just bringing tomorrow’s troubles forward to today. Troubles that might never come, but was there a parent alive who didn’t worry at some time?

  He doubted it. Didn’t excuse his worry, but with having been thrust into the position of a single father, he suspected he would always be more prone to worry. He just had to overcome it.

  But he had SEAL fortitude and that would never change. He and the guys often said the only easy day was yesterday, and he had to get comfortable being uncomfortable. That’s what he had to do. After all, he was all in, all the time with Avery. He could do this.

  Would do this.

  “Let me go get Avery from the kid’s program, and we’ll meet you in the fellowship hall,” he said and turned to leave, greeting the pastor and the few people he’d connected with in his short time there on the way out.

  By the time he reached the gathering room, the kids had finished their worship, and Avery skipped his way. He’d never seen her skip, but then he’d not seen her often in her first seven years. Just occasional visits. More when she’d been a baby when Felicia needed more support, and he’d tried to provide it on his leave.

  He smiled at the sweet child. “Looks like you had a good time.”

  “It was okay, but let’s go. I promised Gran I would help serve the food.” She thrust her hand into his and tugged him down the hallway toward the fellowship hall.