He chuckled, and leaned down to kiss me on my head. It was such a loving gesture and I felt a swell of happiness build in my chest. As sexy as Riyon was, and that was very, he would always feel like my big brother and nothing more.

  I looked over to Zander and he had a single eyebrow raised, looking disapproving but not angry at Riyon’s quick peck. His arms were crossed and I had to make a mental note to soothe his worries as soon as we were alone.

  “Pen and I will take your animal outside. You get some rest and we can discuss some of my theories in the morning.” Riyon patted Zander on the shoulder as he headed for the bedroom door again.

  Penelope blew me a kiss, and Nala stayed by her side as the three of them left my room. Just before the door shut behind them, I caught a glimpse of Riyon’s hand as he stroked his fingers across Pen’s open palm where her hand hung by her side. It was such a simple movement that would have gone unnoticed if I hadn’t been watching them leave. I needed to ask Pen about that very soon.

  Zander’s eyes fell on me, and my insides immediately began to stir for him. He leaned into me, kissing me on the cheek sweetly. I smiled against his gentle kiss.

  “That’s nice,” I said, excited for more of his kisses.

  Zander leaned further, and just as I was about to pull him down on top of me, he reached past me, pulling my bedding open for me to climb in. “Get in there and go to sleep, angel.”

  His words were a whisper against my ear, and he pulled away to show me he was serious. I groaned, climbing into bed and snuggling into the warmth. It was actually really nice, and sleep tugged at me, wanting to pull me into its embrace.

  Zander laid beside me on top of my comforter. He pulled me into his side, and I suddenly hated my blankets. Stupid blankets keeping my Guardian from me.

  “Zander,” I said quietly against his chest. He made a sound like “mhmm” in response. I mulled over the question I had for him, not sure if I dared ask it. “Do you not want to sleep with me?”

  He squeezed me tighter. “I am sleeping with you, angel. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.” I sighed, realizing he didn’t follow my train of thought. And, dang I loved that nickname.

  I pulled my head back so I could look up at Zander’s stubbly face. He looked at me with tired eyes and I grimaced. He had no clue what I was getting at, so I’d have to elaborate. Oh boy.

  “Umm… that’s not what I meant when I said sleep with me…” I trailed off, hoping he didn’t need me to say more.

  Zander froze, and the black of his pupils grew to nearly block out the green of his irises. His hand came up to stroke my red, blushing cheek. “Erin…” he paused to carefully think about his next words, but instead of words, he flipped me onto my back and leaned his body over mine.

  Zander’s lips descended onto mine with a force like none other. It was rough and fast, and I loved it. I wrapped my hands around his neck, but he pulled away too fast for me to get ahold of him and continue the kiss.

  “Erin Porter, if you think I don’t want to claim you as mine, heart, soul, and body,” Oh dear, “then you are absolutely insane. And I have never known you to be crazy. Frustrating, yes. But you are absolutely brilliant and level headed.”

  His nose rubbed against mine and his grip on me strengthened. “Just being near you like this almost pushes me over that edge to where I want to forget my respect for you and disappear inside of your touch.”

  My mouth went dry and I forgot my own name for a good five seconds. If there was ever a time I could forget my morals and be the girl that gives it all up for one moment of lust, this was it. Keep it together, Erin.

  “What are we waiting for, then?” Did I seriously just ask him that? I was absolutely one of those girls.

  His gaze fell to my lips, but quickly flicked back to my eyes. “I don’t want to talk about him, but I think it will help you understand what goes on in my mind. Joey.” Shoot. “When you were with him, he pushed you to give yourself to him. It happened a lot. I watched as he pushed things farther than you wanted, not caring that you weren’t ready.”

  He was right about that. My ex, Joey, always wanted more of me than I was willing to give. Zander continued. “I don’t want to be that man to you, Erin.”

  I reached up and touched his cheek. I loved the feel of his skin. He wasn’t anything like Joey. He was it for me, and I needed him to know that.

  “Zander, you are nothing like him. You are my everything. I love you more than words could ever express. You’re right, I wasn’t ready with Joey. I would have never been ready to be with him in that way.”

  I kissed his lips softly, barely feeling him there. “With you though, I was ready for you to claim me from the moment you told me you loved me. My soul waited for you for a reason. It knew you were mine before I did.”

  Zander’s lips pulled up in a smile. “I love you too, angel. Forever.”

  A thought occurred to me when he said “forever.” Would we really be each other’s forever? “Are we eternal mates?”

  “Not yet.”

  “What if it turns out that we can’t be, though? I don’t have wings, and we’re not the same kind of angel as far as I know.” The stress of my words hit me hard. It was all true.

  Zander pulled me higher onto his chest, settling against the headboard. “Honestly, it’s unheard of for a Guardian and a Throne to mate. Guardians and Powers, yes, but Thrones stick with their own kind.”

  “Your words are not reassuring, Zander.” The ball of nerves in my chest grew.

  He chuckled, and I was shocked at how chill he was. “Just because it’s unheard of, doesn’t mean it’s impossible. My soul knows yours, Erin. Our relationship is not exactly the norm. I’m your Guardian, and you’re my charge, who is also this immensely powerful Throne angel of sorts.” Yup, still sounded nuts.

  “We certainly are one of a kind. It has to be fate, right?”

  “And when you get your wings, and we are marked for one another, I will claim you as mine, and you will claim me as yours, forever.”

  I sighed happily at the thought of that. My mind wanted to succumb to exhaustion, but my body wanted that moment when we became one. “What do we do until then?” Lots of cold showers?

  Zander held tightly to me, a low rumble in his chest. “For now, angel, you sleep.”

  It only took me seconds to obey his gentle command, and I was pulled into the comfort of deep sleep.

  “Erin.”

  A voice called to me but I couldn’t find the source. I looked for Zander, knowing I had been with him only moments ago.

  “Erin, I’m right here.”

  I spun toward the sound. “Zander?”

  A hand fell on my shoulder and I spun again, my heart dropping to my feet at the being standing before me.

  “I’ve missed you,” he said, his black wings stretching behind him.

  I took a step back, not wanting his touch. “I didn’t miss you at all, Joey.”

  Chapter 8

  * * *

  Joey stalked toward me. His black wings framed his body, making him look like the devil himself. At least, what I thought the devil would look like, minus the horns.

  “Get out of my dreams, Joey. You’re not welcome here.” I tried to sound strong and assertive. Joey wasn’t allowed to take from me anymore.

  He stopped moving in closer, turning to look around us with his arms spread wide. “I brought you to your favorite place, Erin. Aren’t you happy to be here with me again?”

  The scene unfolded around me, revealing the high school football stands, where Joey and I would meet up and spend hours together under the stars. I looked up, and sure enough the stars shined brightly, even brighter than I remembered.

  “This isn’t my favorite place anymore. I’ve moved on. I don’t date angels from the underworld anymore.” I glared at him, hoping he could see how little I cared for his presence.

  He shook his head, his nearly black eyes softening. The devilish, cocky Joey disappeared. “I’m sorry.”

  I froze. It wasn’t the first time Joey said sorry to me for being an idiot. Hell, it wasn’t the hundredth time. Still, it was the first time I actually believed him.

  I stared into his eyes, and he was unflinchingly honest. Well, crap.

  “Joey, as much as I hate to, I believe that you’re sorry for lying to me for so many years.” He started to smile, but I held a hand up to stop his joy. “But,” The single word was sharp as I threw it at him. “I don’t think I can ever forgive you for manipulating me, and taking so much of me for yourself when you never once gave me a look into you.”

  His almost-smile dropped hard. “Erin, you don’t understand. I’m not what you think I am.”

  I laughed a rough and angry laugh. “I know you’re not what I think you are. I never knew a single thing about you from the time we were fresh-faced teenagers, pretending to fall in love. And I still don’t know anything.”

  Joey stepped closer again, and I didn’t retreat. A sick part of me hoped he’d try to hurt me so that I could finally hurt him back.

  “You want truth? My name is Jairon. I was born in the underworld to my mother Rebecca. My father was killed in an old battle with my uncle, who ended up raising me to be a warrior for his own personal vendetta. This uncle of mine is your father, Erin. His name is Kieran and he manipulated my childhood to drop me into your life and be whatever you needed me to be.” He stepped even closer. “What you needed from me was a friend. I had no choice but to lie to you and keep watch over you all those years. We grew up together, and I could not tell you the truth no matter how badly I wanted to. I would’ve been killed if I told you, and then you’d be without someone who cared…”

  “Stop!” I’d had enough. His words shook me, like a slow torture to my soul. I refused to believe that Joey, or Jairon, needed any pity from me about his childhood. He could have tried harder. He could have been less of a jerk all those times.

  Joey just watched me, not finishing his story. I knew he had more to say but I didn’t want to hear it. I backed away from him, turning and climbing up the bleachers.

  At the top bench, I turned to him one more time. “Bye, Joey. Stay out of my head.” And then I jumped from the height, jolting myself awake.

  I heard his voice in the air as I came back to my waking mind. “I don’t know about you, Erin, but I didn’t pretend to fall in love.”

  ⬨⬨⬨

  I pushed myself harder on the homemade obstacle course, diving headfirst over the four-foot tall log, and ending in a tucked roll. In one breath, I was already back on my feet and dodging Penelope’s pinecones as she tossed them with wicked speed.

  It wasn’t enough. I needed more of a challenge. I spun to my left, toward Riyon. He stood shirtless with his red wings spread wide, ready for my attack. I had been running at him this way for two weeks, and he always took me down in five seconds.

  Not this time.

  I had a plan.

  I bent forward on my left knee, charging toward Riyon like a bull just released into the ring. His smile was cocky, knowing he had the upper hand like always.

  I smiled back, and he wasn’t expecting that. His eyebrows raised, and without hesitation, I spun left again, and slammed my shoulder into Zander’s stomach. He was usually on the sidelines of this particular training routine, dressed in workout clothes like an adorable coach, but he was my way to show what I was made of.

  As much as I loved him, I wasn’t above beating the crap out of him. He had super healing after all. I just needed the element of surprise, and I got it.

  “Oomph.” Zander’s breath pushed out of him, and he was knocked back a good few feet from my hit.

  I heard Riyon laugh behind me, and my confidence came on, full-fledged. I slid down and wrapped my arm around Zander’s knee, pulling his leg out from under him and knocking him to the ground.

  I ended up on top of him, straddling his hips, and I looked down at him, momentarily distracted by my accomplishment. He looked up at me with wide green eyes, and something else, pride. He started to smile, but I wasn’t done yet.

  The angels had taught me a lot of fighting moves over the weeks of training, but they rarely gave me a chance to use them for real. I was taking my moment.

  I spun my legs from under me, to wrap my ankles around Zander’s neck. He reached out to stop me, grabbing my wrists in one of his hands and bucking his hips to throw me off of him. In one fluid motion, he twisted my arms behind my back, and pulled me to my feet. He wrapped his free arm around my neck, pulling me into a tight choke-hold.

  His lips stroked my ear, his words coming out in a whisper. “You sure you want to fight me, angel?”

  I shook my head side to side, hopefully throwing him off. As much as I could so easily tap out, I had started this, and I wasn’t finished. Zander’s chest rumbled against my spine in a confident laugh as he released his hold on my neck.

  “Good. Now, let’s start the course again…”

  I cut his words off by pushing my head forward and then throwing it back into his face. Crap! Nobody ever told me how bad headbutts hurt.

  Zander loosened his hold on me and I took the opportunity to spin on him with my hands up in front of me in a fighting stance. My eyes found Zander holding his bleeding nose, and… smiling?

  I dropped my hands, groaning. “You’re smiling? Am I really that pathetic?”

  Laughter came from all of the angels around me. Zander gripped the bottom of his shirt and pulled it over his head, bunching it up like a rag to wipe his bloody nose. I was left staring at his chiseled abs, and all thoughts of fighting fled my mind.

  “I’m not smiling because you’re pathetic, Erin.” He pointed to his nose. “Believe it or not, you’re a lot stronger than you used to be. Here’s proof.”

  “So, what? You’re proud of me?” I tried to hold back my smile as I stood taller.

  His crooked grin was incredible and I wanted to pounce on him right then and there, broken nose and all. A throat cleared behind me and I was pulled back to reality.

  Pen had her hands on her curvy hips and a knowing grin on her porcelain face. “Stop flirting and let’s move on. The heat coming from you two is absolutely ridiculous.”

  Riyon snorted and a hot blush filled my cheeks. “Shut up, Pen!”

  Strong arms wrapped around me from behind and I fell into Zander’s touch. “Be nice to Penelope. We have a surprise for you.”

  I wiggled myself around until I was looking up at him. “What kind of surprise?” His words filled me with excitement. It had been the same routine day after day, so a change sounded heavenly.

  He looked past me toward the others. “Do you guys want to tell her?”

  “No, you say it.”

  I threw my arms in the air. “Somebody say it! I’m dying!”

  Zander placed both of his hands on the sides of my face, stopping my freak out. “Well, the three of us have decided that it’s about time we go see your parents. How does that sound?”

  I jumped out of Zander’s arms and covered my mouth with my hands. “Are you serious?”

  “Super serious!” Penelope said.

  I squealed. “When? Can we go right now? Will it be safe?”

  Penelope held her hands up to stop my incessant chatter. “We’re flying out tonight.” She and Riyon moved in closer and they both pulled me into a group hug.

  I wanted to cry, but I had work to do. “I need to pack!” I shouted, and ran toward the house with three angels laughing behind me.

  I was going to see my parents and Bruno! Nothing could have made me happier in that moment.

  Chapter 9

  * * *

  “Have you seen Joey since that night?” Penelope whispered to me as I fought sleep in my airplane seat. She insisted on sitting beside me and making the guys sit in the two seats in front of us.

  I noticed Zander sit up straighter, not looking back at us. He was listening to our conversation.

  Personally, I wanted to cuddle up to him for the five hour flight to Albuquerque, but my girl needed me. She was going through a confusing time with Riyon and she refused to be alone with him. I tried for the past week to get her to talk to him and see where he stood, but she was stubborn, saying he needed to make a move first and stop being a coward.

  I shook my head. “No. I’ve had a hard time sleeping, but he hasn’t shown up. I just feel like I’m too vulnerable when I sleep. It’s too easy for them to get to me.”

  Even though I hadn’t seen any Nephilim in my dreams since Joey, it has put me on high alert at all times. Zander flipped out when he heard about the invasion of my subconscious. He hardly sleeps as well now, worrying about me and watching over me like a good Guardian.

  “You look beat, sweetie. You should try to rest. I’ll be here the whole time, okay?”

  “But I thought we were going to have girl time.”

  Pen looked at me with the same worried eyes as Zander. “They’re angels, hon. They can literally hear every word we speak.” She widened her eyes and tilted her head toward the boys in front of us.

  I yawned, unable to stop it. “Fine. I’ll try to sleep, but if I start screaming, you’ll be the one explaining it to the other passengers.”

  She rolled her blue eyes. “I’ll just tell them you’re mental.”

  “Thanks,” I said sarcastically. “You’re a peach.”

  I closed my eyes, instantly realizing that I was more exhausted than I thought as my body sagged and I drifted into a peaceful rest.

  I was running. Nala’s heavy footfalls padded along the woods beside me as we sped through the trees. It was freeing.

  The wind whipped my long black waves around me, and caused a chill to fall over my skin. It wasn’t a dangerous chill though, like when I felt someone watching me. It felt amazing, like a fall breeze.

  My whole body could feel things deeper, and I was picking up small noises, like the sound of squirrels chattering in the treetops, and Nala’s heavy breath as she kept a steady pace beside me.