His massive paw took a step forward and he sniffed the air around me. I was only inches from him now. He smelled like sulfur and tar, and he towered at least six feet over me.

  I stared up at him, hoping my power toward animals was in high gear. “What do you think about Bear? I feel like it suits you. You’re pretty big and furry, like a bear.”

  He bent all three heads down until I was looking directly into six eyes. They all scanned me, and with the head in the center, he pressed his forehead against my chest, nearly knocking me over. I lowered my hand to the back of his neck, stroking the fur.

  “Okay, Bear. I think this is a great start.”

  With Bear in my corner, I had to try one more thing. It was time to astral project to Zander.

  Chapter 14

  * * *

  The one question I was able to get answered was if I had my abilities. The white haired Nephilim informed me that I could use my powers, but I’d regret it. Bear was supposed to harm me anytime I tried to call on energy.

  I was really banking on him liking me enough for it not to matter. As far as I was aware, none of the fallen knew that I had power over animals. It was an ace in my pocket, and I was sure as hell using it.

  I settled on the hard ground beside Bear, stroking each of his snouts. I had no clue if he had separate consciences in each head, but I didn’t want to risk making one jealous of the other.

  “Okay, big guy. I need you to let me do something. I really like you, but I can’t stay in this place. I have a family and friends. Do you understand that?”

  He rolled onto his side, getting more comfortable and his big tongue rolled out of one of his mouths. I smiled. His breath was rancid, but dang he was adorable somehow. “Please don’t kill me, okay?”

  I closed my eyes, relaxing against Bear’s warmth. I tried pulling energy from him, and I could feel the power he held. It fueled my power to an amazing extreme. If I had looked, I’d have likely seen my body glowing, but I tried to stay focused on my destination in my mind.

  In a whisper, I said his name. “Zander.”

  I felt my soul begin to separate from my physical self. I pictured the green of Zander’s eyes and the clean cotton and musk smell that was only his. I had the weightless feeling, and when I opened my eyes I was floating above myself.

  I willed myself to return back to earth, and my soul did all of the work, pulling me at lightning speed until I was looking down at Zander. It was dark, and he was sitting alone in the same place that I left him.

  Dad’s truck was gone, but Zander sat on the ground, shirtless, and his white wings hung limp on his back as he looked out over the city. I pushed myself to stand behind him, my heart racing at seeing him alive and well.

  “Zander. I’m here.”

  He jumped from the ground and spun with a speed that blurred to my eyes. He looked exhausted, and his brown hair was a mess of curls. He looked me up and down, and a new sadness filled him.

  “Angel. You’re not really here, though.”

  He stepped closer to me, and his hands moved to stroke my cheeks. They passed through me, and it made my soul actually hurt. I belonged to him, and it had been too long without his touch.

  “I’m sorry. I don’t know how to leave. This was the only way I could talk to you.” I moved closer until our chests would have been touching.

  “Just tell me where you are. I’ll come find you.” He looked into my eyes, and even without my body, I could feel his determination.

  I shook my head. “I’m in the Underworld, Zander. My birth father took me to his home and won’t let me leave.”

  His eyes closed tightly. “Dammit! We can’t enter the Underworld, Erin.” His voice was nearly a growl.

  “That’s what I figured. But listen. I may be new to this angel thing, but no matter what it takes, I will come back to you.”

  I wanted to soothe the worried wrinkle on his forehead. He had no way of helping me, and if I had been in his place, I’d want to tear the world down to find him. His eyes opened again and his fingers came up to trace the outline of my lips.

  He sighed. “It’s ironic, isn’t it? For so long I couldn’t touch you, and then you were finally mine. And now, after all we’ve been through, we’re back to square one.”

  I licked my lips, wishing I could taste his touch there. “When I am able to bring my body back to earth, just promise me you’ll find me.”

  He nodded. “I promise. Just hurry that little butt up. I believe in you, angel.”

  I felt a warm tug on my body. Bear was trying to wake me. “I have to go, but please tell me if everyone else is okay. Last I saw Pen, she was being attacked.” Please be okay.

  “Everyone survived the ambush, though I about burned the city down when I lost you.”

  A heavy weight pressed into my body and I felt myself returning. “I love you, Zander.”

  I didn’t hear his response as I was pulled instantly back to myself. My eyes flew open to see Bear’s heavy paw pressing into my chest. I gasped against the weight of it, and when he saw me awake, he stepped away and began wagging his black tail.

  His tongue came out to lick my face and when I looked past him, far in the distance the brunette Nephilim was returning to check in. I realized then that Bear was only trying to get my attention, and I immediately ran back into the house, narrowly making it before getting caught.

  “Thank you,” I whispered back to the furry beast, and I swear one of his massive heads smiled.

  ⬨⬨⬨

  I was lost in thoughts of how to create a portal without wings when Joey showed up to the house. I had been wracking my brain, snuggled up to Bear in the front yard. He always seemed to be in higher spirits when I pet him, but I could only do it when the Nephilim were gone.

  I jumped away from Bear when Joey landed outside the main gate. “Crap,” I muttered under my breath. I was supposed to have at least another hour before anyone came by.

  Joey smirked at me, walking past Bear and standing above me. “You should really be more careful about hiding that ability, Erin. If they see you befriending the cerberus, you’re screwed.”

  He reached a hand down to help me up but I waved him away. Of course he knew what I was capable of with animals. He saw my love for them when we were “together.” I stood from the hard ground and brushed my black skirt off.

  I had been layering the outfits that were left for me, trying to cover my skin as well as I could. Still, the short skirts could only be worn a handful of ways and Joey was staring at my bare legs with a hunger in his eyes. I knew that look.

  “Stop looking at me like that!” I yelled at him and his smile grew. “And why do you care if I’m careful out here? You’re the one who dropped me off without a word, abandoning me.”

  Joey’s smile fell and he crossed his arms. “You are so hot headed!”

  I stepped back. “Me? Are you serious right now? You’re the Nephilim, Joey, born in the worst place in existence! Or should I call you Jairon?” The name didn’t suit him.

  He scoffed. “It doesn’t matter what you call me. Soon you’ll have the right to have me killed, so I imagine I won’t be around much longer.”

  My eyebrows scrunched together. Why would he think I’d have him killed? “I don’t want you dead. Is that what you think of me?”

  “It’s said that you were created to be the evil above all others, ruling the Underworld and mercilessly killing those who so much as look at you the wrong way. After how I lied to you for so long, I can’t imagine I’ll be spared from your wrath.”

  Even as he said the ridiculous words, he didn’t look scared of me. He didn’t believe what Kieran claimed I was, and neither did I.

  “Do you think I'm really going to be that monster?”

  He shrugged, running long fingers through his black silky hair. “Honestly? At the risk of securing my future death, no. I don’t see that darkness in you.”

  I sighed, more relieved than I thought I could possibly feel. “My birth mother said I was created by God, to be pure and good.” His eyes flicked to the ground, but I caught something there. “What are you hiding from me, Joey?”

  He groaned and rolled his eyes. “You know, I hate that you know me so well.”

  I blew out a very sarcastic sounding puff of air. “I don’t know you at all, remember?”

  He shook his head, finally making eye contact with me. I couldn’t deny that he always had a way of making my heart sigh at how handsome he was. But he wasn’t my eternal mate, and never would be.

  He chewed on his bottom lip. “Well, you know me well enough to see that I’m hiding something. I would die for saying this, but your father is wrong about you. I believe one hundred percent that you are made from God.” His nose scrunched when he said God. He clearly wasn’t a fan. “Believe it or not, I see only goodness in you. Somebody involved in your creation was lied to, and I don’t think it was your mother.”

  His words hung heavy on my chest. I did believe it, but I hadn’t realized the likelihood of it until now. My parents meeting, my mother having me and dying so I could be raised by good humans, and Kieran’s belief that I was the Underworld’s leader. It was all orchestrated by God himself. It had to be.

  I reached out and grabbed Joey’s hands. He froze and his eyes turned black. “Joey, if you really believe this, can I assume that you never wanted to hurt me?”

  “I never wanted to hurt you, Erin. I struggled keeping my darkness in check throughout our relationship and I failed on multiple occasions. I don’t deserve to have your forgiveness, even if you ever chose to give it. I’m incapable of love, and I know this.”

  My heart broke for him. He tried to love me, even though it went against his nature. “For what it’s worth, I do forgive you.”

  His mouth opened slightly and his eyes fell to our hands. His voice was a whisper when he spoke. “I know how to get you out of here.”

  Chapter 15

  * * *

  My heart fluttered. Joey was going to help me leave. Maybe he was capable of love after all. My hopes were up, and I wasn’t waiting another minute.

  “Are you serious? Let’s go then!”

  His smile was back and he turned toward the black gate, pulling me along with him as we walked out into the dry ground beyond the property. Bear followed us quietly, staying directly behind me.

  Joey stopped walking and let go of my hand. The spot was no different than any other spot on the land, but he stared at the ground like this was the perfect picnic location. “Here,” he said, and plucked a black feather from his wing.

  “You can create a portal here? Isn’t there a special portal location?”

  He looked at me like I was an idiot. “Not in the Underworld. There is an entrance, but when it’s time to leave, all you need to find is an area with an abundance of energy, like this one.”

  I focused on the spot he stopped at, and he was right. It felt… powerful. Like a heat pocket was just below the surface. I nodded, ready to go. Hell, I was ready to leave on day one.

  He took my nod as a go ahead and sliced his wrist with the feather quill. I flinched. I will never get used to seeing that.

  He began writing like I had seen the other angels do in the air. His lettering was quick and flawless. He had done this a lot, but it made sense since he was placed on earth to keep tabs on me. He had to travel a lot to relay what he learned.

  The portal began forming, the blackness growing in a swirling black hole. I took a deep breath, ready to step through, but a low growl came from behind me. Right, Bear.

  I turned to Bear and ran my hand through the fur on his chest. All three of his heads watched me with a sad look and I wanted to cry. “I’m so sorry, Bear. You can’t come with me to earth. You’d cause a huge panic.”

  His center head, that I assumed was the main one, if that were a thing, bent down and pressed against my chest. His eyes closed and he licked my cheek, his huge tongue covering half my face. I giggled and wiped at the wetness.

  “I’m finally going home to the ones I love, but know that I will always love you too.”

  He grunted and backed away from me. I turned back to Joey, ready to leave, but the look on his face was too sad. “What’s wrong?”

  Joey twisted his hands together and I noticed the slice on his wrist already healing. “I can’t let you go, Erin.”

  My heart dropped. “No. I have to go.” I started to panic. He has to let me go.

  Joey looked at the portal and back at me, speaking above the storm sound that came from it. “You said you’re going home to your loved ones. Where exactly do I fit into that life?”

  I was silent. He didn’t fit into that life, and he knew it as well as I did. My silence answered his question.

  “I can’t let you leave me. I know I said I can’t love you, but what I do feel is the closest a creature like me can come. I can’t be with you there.” He pointed to the portal. “But maybe here, we could have a future.”

  I shook my head, tears forming in my eyes. This wasn’t happening. I had so much hope that I’d be going home today. I looked into his eyes and saw only resolve there. He wasn’t going to allow me to leave, and I wasn’t going to allow myself to stay.

  I stepped closer to him where he stood just beside the open portal. “Joey,” I said softly, trying to hide my betrayal. I needed him distracted.

  I reached my hand up to his jaw, and his eyes closed against my touch. I quickly looked at Bear, pleading with my eyes. This was the true test of my power over animals. Please, Bear. Help me.

  Joey’s eyes opened and in a flash, his lips were on mine. His hands dove into my hair, and a tear fell down my cheek. Bear, now! I shouted in my mind and amazingly, Joey was ripped from me.

  I didn’t hesitate as I saw Bear throw Joey to the ground. Joey’s eyes were round and full of hurt when I jumped, and the space around me went dark as I was pulled home.

  ⬨⬨⬨

  Nobody told me how exactly you traveled inside of a portal, and I hated all of them for it. I was pulled in what felt like a dozen different directions inside the black hole.

  It felt like I had no true destination as thoughts filled my head of safe locations I wanted to be. I thought of Zander’s arms, my parent’s house, the field I played soccer on as a kid, the home in the mountains that Pen bought for me, and the beach in California that my parents took me to when I begged to see the ocean at the age of seven.

  I imagined the feel of the sand in my toes and the crashing waves on the shore, and in seconds I was lying on my back on hot sand while the sun set over the ocean. The portal was gone, and as far as I could tell, I was back on earth.

  The smell of the ocean hit my nose and tears immediately began to fall down my face. Even though it was nearly as warm out as it had been in the Underworld, the heat was welcoming and felt like heaven. I cried until I was hiccuping.

  I was all alone on the beach in who-knows-where. There were no buildings or boats in sight. No people walked around, and when I looked toward the land it was all trees and mountains. I wasn’t on the same beach I had been on years before, so where in the world was I?

  My only indication of location was the fact that the sun set out on the water, though that did me no good. I sat criss-cross on the ground, breathing away my tears, and closed my eyes. I was an angel, dang it! It was about time I acted like it.

  I pulled in the energy around me, from the setting sun on me, and the force of the crashing waves. My body filled with power, and just when I tried to teleport myself to Zander, a stabbing pain spread through my back.

  “Gah!” I shouted and doubled over onto the sand.

  I stopped breathing and wanted to scream at the top of my lungs. I had never felt such pain before, it was crippling. No sound came from my throat as I opened my mouth to yell, and bones in my back started to crack.

  I’m dying!

  After another loud crack, an immense pressure left me and I was able to breathe again. I looked over my shoulder and my teary eyes about sprung from my head.

  Wings, I have flippin wings!

  Chapter 16

  * * *

  Something was wrong. As far as I knew as I stared at the feathered wings on my back, I was officially an angel… but not any type that I knew of. I was a freak after all.

  Instead of one set of wings, I had two! On my back sat four freakin’ wings, and I could not stop staring at them. “What in all that is freaky am I?”

  Kieran was right when he told me I’d have black wings, but he was wrong too. The top set of wings were white, a pure and flawless white, just like Zander’s, but the bottom wings were raven black, and the feathers were silky smooth just like the Nephilim.

  Yup, half-thing was right.

  I looked out at the ocean, wishing I knew how to use my super weird wings to fly home, wherever that was. I wiggled my shoulders, trying to connect with the appendages. My wings fluttered, but I couldn’t get them to work in tandem.

  “Ouch!” Another pain came from behind me, but this time it felt like the bottom of my white wings touched a hot fire poker. The burning ended quickly and I was catching my breath again.

  I looked up to the sky and yelled at whoever was causing this torture. “What the hell? What next, huh?”

  “Erin!” A warm and masculine voice called my name, and my heart squeezed at the beautiful sound.

  I snapped my head from the darkening sky and my eyes landed on Zander, his white wings spread wide across his bare back and his green eyes watching me with a wildness. He’s here.

  I gasped, and it only took me a second to reach him and wrap my arms around his neck. His pure white aura enveloped me and I could feel the ache he carried in him for me. He lifted me off the ground and I buried my face in his warm neck, inhaling his perfect scent. “I can’t believe you found me,” I whispered against his skin.