Hank scratched his head. “Do you think we would have figured out it was Buford behind the Goose Juice if he hadn’t registered the LLC?”

  “With Virgil’s letter we would have. But it just proves my daddy’s point when he said, ‘Don’t sell the skin until after you’ve shot the bear.’ Buford was just in too galldern of a hurry.”

  To Hank he said, “The doctor’s gonna send over a report. Go ahead and write up what you can, and we’ll attach it when it gets here.” He watched Hank get up and start to leave. When he got to the office doorway, he stopped him. “Hank, you all right?”

  Hank turned around, his face showing he was not all right. But he said, “Right as rain, Chief. I’ll get that report wrapped up.”

  Johnny nodded. “Did you get all the evidence signed in?”

  “I sure did, Chief. And I found quite a file about Virgil on Buck’s computer. Shoot, Buck missed his calling. He shoulda worked for us as an investigator. He stalked that man and kept a log.”

  “Well I’ll be.”

  “It’s pretty much wrapped up, Chief. I sent the tennis racket off for testing. He cleaned up the handle but left the top of the racket as it was. Guess he really wanted to implicate Caledonia. All that’s left is for you to interview him even though he confessed to me.”

  “Well, I’d like to get it on record. So let’s go get it over with. Hank, make sure you handcuff him and bring him to the interrogation room.”

  “With pleasure.” He started to leave but turned back. “You mean the break room?”

  The chief waved his hand. “Whatever.”

  Johnny was eating an orange Hostess cupcake when Hank brought in Mayor Buck and shoved him into a chair opposite the chief.

  Johnny swallowed and took a deep breath. “Well, Mayor, what do you have to say for yourself?”

  Buck turned his head and stared at the ceiling.

  Hank pounced. “Mayor Buck, me and you are gonna mix if you don’t tell the chief same as you told me last night.”

  Buck propped his foot on his knee and glared at Hank.

  Johnny finished his cupcake before asking, “Sounds to me like you’re a liar and a lunatic. Is that about the size of it?”

  “Don’t forget the kidnapping charges, Chief,” Hank reminded him.

  “Holding an officer of the law against his will. Yes, that will sting. But I ‘spect the murder charge is what’s gonna hurt the most.”

  Hank said, “He followed Virgil everywhere. You ask me, he was watching when Caledonia and Mary Alice were with Virgil. He saw his opportunity to get rid of his opposition, and he took it. Then he took the murder weapon with him. Soon as the test results come back, we’ll have him. No question.”

  Velveeta had been standing in the door, and now she came into the room. “I tell you what, Buck. I always thought you were as sorry as a two-dollar watch. But this beats all.” Velveeta straightened herself to her full height and towered over the mayor.

  Buck’s eyes went from her toes to her eyes. “Yeah? Well, you’re so big you could sell shade on a summer day.”

  “Okay, you two. That’s enough.” Johnny stood, cleaned up the cupcake wrapper, and threw it away. “Buck, we’ve got you dead to rights if you’ll pardon the pun. We have the murder weapon, we have your confession to Officer Beanblossom, we have the files on your computer, and pretty soon we’ll have Virgil’s blood on that racket you tried to throw away. Your goose is cooked.” Johnny shrugged. “So don’t talk. That would just be gravy. But I’ll tell you, it’s just plain common sense to plead guilty and skip all the nonsense of a trial. Move on over to your future home and get settled in.”

  Hank scoffed. “Common sense isn’t a flower that grows in everyone’s garden.”

  Buck said, “I want a lawyer.”

  Hank pointed at the mayor. “See? I told you.”

  “We’ll have a lawyer sent to your cell. Have a nice day. Officer Witherspoon, you may escort the prisoner back to lockup. Let him talk to his attorney there. Then transport him to the detention center in Knoxville to await trial. Take Hank or Skeeter with you.”

  “My pleasure,” Velveeta said, pulling the man up under his arm and leading him off to the cells.

  Skeeter came in the door, and Johnny asked, “Where you been, Officer?”

  “Court. Your suspicions were right. Bunhead pleaded guilty. The judge sentenced him to fifty hours of community service for running an illegal still.”

  “What does that mean?”

  Hank smiled and answered the question. “Means he can go back to picking up trash everywhere he goes.”

  “That’s all?”

  Skeeter nodded. “That’s all.”

  Thursday evening, six days after Dead Virgil

  “Get your butt off your shoulders,” Junebug said to Hank, who was sitting at the diner’s counter.

  His hand propped up his head, and he straightened but didn’t smile.

  “You look lower than a doodlebug. What’s the matter? I heard y’all solved two big cases this week. I’da thought you’d be celebrating. You want pie? Pie makes everything better. Or are you all filled up with cupcakes?” Junebug’s last sentence dripped with sarcasm and jealousy.

  Hank sighed. “Looks like no more cupcakes for me unless I can figure out how to climb out of the hole I dug for myself.”

  Junebug rolled her eyes. “Men. Y’all are always messing something up. What’d you do?”

  “It’s not important. I don’t think it’s something she’s gonna forgive anytime soon.”

  Junebug put a piece of cherry pie in front of him. “Here. It’s on the house. I’m a firm believer in the powers of pie.”

  Hank picked up the fork but just picked at the flaky crust. “I don’t know, Junebug. I don’t think anything can fix this.”

  Jack and Tess came into the diner, and Hank waved them over. “Did Johnny tell you?”

  Jack tilted his head. “Tell us what?”

  “Buford and Virgil were both behind the land scheme. They hired Louis P. to represent them so they could keep their identities hidden long as possible. Turns out Buford was responsible for the methanol homicides. Buford didn’t kill Virgil, but Virgil turned him in, posthumously, because he was afraid he might kill him. He wanted to get you to sell your land for cheap.”

  “Well, I’ll be dogged.” A big smile spread over Jack’s face. “So that means I can get my land back.”

  Hank nodded. “That it does, Jackson.”

  Tess, standing with her back to the door, said, “Well if Buford didn’t kill Virgil, who did?”

  Paprika and Caledonia came up behind Tess to join the group. “What’s all the hullabaloo?” Caledonia asked.

  “Hank was just about to tell us who killed Virgil,” Jack said.

  Before Hank could answer, Martha Maye, Johnny, and Louetta came through the door.

  “So? Who was it?” Tess pressed.

  Hank let the tension build while he waited for the three to join the group. Finally, he answered. “Mayor Buck killed Virgil.”

  “Get outta town,” Jack said.

  “Oh my word!” Caledonia said, her hand covering her mouth momentarily. “My money was on Scary Mary.”

  “Nope. Buck did it. Out of love for his job or love for the town or in the heat of the moment, I’m not sure. Instead of mayor for life, he’ll be doing life.”

  Johnny raised one eyebrow at Caledonia. “He was hoping to frame you, Callie.”

  “Me? What did I ever do to him?”

  “Oh, I think saving his own hide was more of his motivation in that. But don’t worry. We’ve got enough evidence. He’s going up the river.”

  Caledonia said, “What a crying shame. And now who’s gonna be mayor?”

  Without hesitation, all eyes went to Jack.

  Jack backed up, eyes wide, hands up. “Oh, no. No no no no. I do not need that headache.”

  Johnny said, “Come on, Jack. It’ll be fun. We’ll help you. And with God’s help, you could be the best mayor we ever had.”

  Paprika quoted the Bible: “The good book says, ‘Fear not, I am the one who helps you.’”

  Hank spoke up, “You are so right, Paprika.”

  She blushed, and a look passed between the two. Behind her, the diner’s door opened and Daisy came in. Hank, sitting on a counter stool, had been hidden by the group standing around him, but when Paprika glanced over her shoulder, she moved just enough for Daisy to see him. First she took a step back like she was going to leave, and then she squared her shoulders and walked to a booth.

  The expression on Paprika’s face changed to disappointment. Hank’s face changed from shocked to brooding.

  He cleared his throat and stood, now looking resolute. “Would y’all excuse me?”

  All heads swiveled to watch Hank follow Daisy to a booth. She sat, and he stood, and after they exchanged a few words, he slid into the booth seat opposite her.

  Louetta’s eyes grew big, and she whispered, “Oh, law, she looks like she’s about to teach him just how the cow ate the cabbage.”

  “She’s not gonna tell him off, Mama. She’s too sweet.”

  “That man always could charm the birds out of the trees. Any idea what’s going on with those two?”

  “No, Mama, and it’s none of our business. C’mon, y’all, let’s get a table.”

  The group got a table in the middle of the room. Jack waved down Junebug. “Sweet tea for everybody, Junie B. And it’s on me.”

  Tess added, “And pie too.”

  In unison, they all said, “And pie too.”

  “Sweet music to my ears, Jackson. It’ll be up in a jiffy.”

  THE END

  Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright

  OTHER BOOKS IN THE SERIES

  Dedication

  Prologue

  One

  Two

  Three

  Four

  Five

  Six

  Seven

  Eight

  Nine

  Ten

  Eleven

  Twelve

  Thirteen

  Fourteen

  Fifteen

  Sixteen

  Seventeen

  Eighteen

  Nineteen

  Twenty

  Twenty-one

  Twenty-two

  Twenty-three

  Twenty-four

  Twenty-five

  Twenty-six

  Twenty-seven

  Twenty-eight

  Twenty-nine

  Thirty

  THE END

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  I am lucky to have some very kind people who helped in finishing this book. Thank you, Ellen Mansoor Collier, Sarah Mallery, Patricia Zick (writers extraordinaire), Lisa Spears (reader, proofreader, and sister extraordinaire), Liz Metz (medical expert and daughter-in-law extraordinaire), Baly Barlow McGill, DVM (veterinarian and sweetie pie extraordinaire), Jeanne Lemoine Keith (friend extraordinaire), and Logan Forshee (police officer extraordinaire). You are valued and appreciated!

  Thank you to the readers who encouraged me to keep writing and for their patience in waiting for this book. Your kind words kept me returning to my laptop when I otherwise might not have. I hope it was worth the wait.

  Last but not least, thank you to my editor, Lisa Binion (editor extraordinaire), for pouring over every word in the book more than once with loving care. I am grateful.

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Amy Metz is the author of the Goose Pimple Junction mystery series. She is a former first grade teacher and the mother of two grown sons. When not thinking about murder, her favorite place to be is with her family. Reading, photography, and baking (yes! Cupcakes!) are some of her favorite things to do. Amy lives in Louisville, Kentucky, and loves unique Southern phrases, cupcakes, and a good mystery. Connect on social media or find out more at authoramymetz.com. And if you like cupcakes (and who doesn’t?), check out Amy’s cupcake board on Pinterest.

 

 

  Amy Metz, Liars & Lunatics in Goose Pimple Junction

 

 

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