Be clear with him that you have no problem with him wanting to play Halo on the weekend but that you need to have him devote some spare time to you as well. If you want to attract this vampire, I'd recommend employing the “Sit and Smile” technique. Just sit there and listen quietly, smiling and truly hearing him. You don't have to be interested in what he's talking about, just be fair enough to hear him out. It's perfectly acceptable for you to say “I'm not really into all that,” at the end of his long diatribe but he'll appreciate that you made the effort to form an opinion. Be prepared to keep listening though, as this guy is going to have a lot to say.

  Satin Cape

  The GQ vampire is your classic suave gentleman. He looks like a million bucks and that's just fine but do you really want the pressure of being his girlfriend? This type of vampire requires a woman that's just as put together as he is and really, it's hard to argue with him when he puts so much effort into looking good.

  If you want this man's attention, you must be as perfectly dressed as possible, wear make-up always, and get your hair done regularly. I know, I know, you thought I was going to tell you ways to deal with him, well I am. You want this type of vampire? You have to put in some hard work. Just as opposites attract, the saying “like attracts like” is also true and it comes into play here. This type of man expects the best out of himself and out of his mate. If this is too much for you, find a different vampire.

  However, if you happen to be a woman who loves looking her best, this can be the perfect man for you. Primp to your heart's content knowing that your man will be sitting at the mirror right beside you. Do not let him walk all over you though. This guy is a strong character and he needs a strong woman to compliment him. He may find enjoyment out of molding you for a little while but eventually he's going to get bored and start looking for a mate that doesn't need his help looking good.

  If he tries to suggest what you should wear or what color your hair should be, don't immediately fly off the handle with him but don't acquiesce either. Ask him to explain why he feels this would be good for you and then decide if you agree. If you don't, tell him why you like the way you've done things so far and if he doesn't, he can buy himself a doll and dress her.

  No Reflection

  The thinker, the tortured artist, the poet. Oh he's my favorite I must admit, and I'm drawn to this vampire type like a moth to flame, which is a good analogy because this guy will burn you up if you're not careful. Ever heard the saying fight fire with fire? This guy is passionate and he's looking for a woman just as passionate.

  You don't have to be an artist yourself, you just have to appreciate the type of work he does, and let him know it. In fact, compliments on this vampire's chosen artform will take you much farther than complimenting his physical appeal. I'd go as far as to say you should act as if his looks have very little to do with your attraction to him. He wants to be consumed and you must be voracious about your consumption if you want to get through to this monster.

  Listen to what he has to say but be sure to add a lot to the conversation, with a lot of drama. Now I should note here that whatever you show passion about should actually be something your interested in because this vamp will scent inauthenticity like blood on the wind. Find something you love and then relate it to what he loves, this way you're not compromising yourself.

  Want him to write poetry about you? Then make sure you're worth writing about. When I write, I look for interesting people to inspire my characters. No one's inspired by a boring woman who has no interests, loves, or drive. Find out who you really are and run with it, follow your dreams, and live everyday as if it's a chance to experience the things you love. This is what will attract the Reflection-less vampire, for he needs you to give him the proper reflection of himself. You have to be his mirror and to do that, I recommend you start polishing yourself so you can be the best mirror you can be.

  Wrangling the Werewolf

  Werewolves are the men who are less evolved in all the best ways. This guy still retains the instinct to throw you over his shoulder and carry you back to his cave. He is however, man enough to refrain from doing that... mostly. If you encourage him enough, he'll happily indulge any abduction fantasies you have.

  On the whole, the way to a werewolf's heart is through his senses. Eyes, ears, nose, and mouth, you want to make sure that everything going into these places is good for him. Let me clarify. You should look nice, this doesn't me you have to be model perfect, just look as attractive as you can so you can stimulate his eyes. Wear flattering clothing and brush your hair. Put on some lip gloss. It doesn't have to be a lot, just make an effort. You should sound sexy. Werewolf men don't like high-pitched sounds, so if you have a very girly voice, I'd recommend you lower it an octave when speaking with them. Practice it in private, I promise it will work wonders. I've actually seen werewolf men cover their ears when a woman with a high-pitched voice is speaking. Think dogs with whistles. Ouch.

  You should smell nice, I recommend a perfume with either a vanilla or cinnamon base, both of which has been shown to make men think about love upon smelling them. The werewolf man is big about smells. You should sound nice so he can repeatedly bury his face in your neck a huff warmly on you. “You smell good enough to eat,” he'll say. Which brings me to my last tip. You should taste good. Now taste, this applies to both yourself and your cooking and yes, women libbers you should cook for this man. As far as your body goes, make sure you maintain good hygiene down there, I cannot stress this enough. This should really be a rule no matter what man you want but especially for the wolves. I can't tell you how many werewolf men have complained to me about women who don't smell good down there. You can forget about oral sex, the wolfman won't perform if he doesn't think your clean and honestly, why would you want him to? He's going to kiss you afterward. So keep yourself clean and reap the benefits because when this guy does enjoy your taste, he will spend quite awhile eating you up.

  The cooking part is pretty self-explanatory but I'll go over it anyway. Cook for him but make sure you do it well. If you can't cook, buy something to reheat at home and feed him that until you learn, but do learn. This man will appreciate a home cooked meal almost as much as he'll appreciate that push-up bra you're wearing. Feed the wolf and he'll keep coming around.

  Hairy

  The Hairy werewolf is the man who doesn't give a lick about his appearance. This does not mean he doesn't care about yours. If you want to get this man's attention, you must be just as confident in your appearance as he is in his. For women this doesn't translate the same.

  Where he can pick up any old shirt off the floor and toss it on while still looking good, you cannot. This doesn't mean you have to be a fashion plate either, what it means is that you must dress yourself in a way that makes you feel good. This isn't about what you're wearing, it's about how what you're wearing changes the way you think about yourself.

  The Hairy werewolf may notice that your wearing a red shirt that dips enticingly toward your cleavage but ask him later what you had on and he won't have a clue. The only thing he'll remember is the way you caught his attention with your confidence after your bosom worked its magic. Oh and your body will definitely be the first thing this monster notices so if you have a hang-up about men ogling you, go pursue vampires instead. The werewolf ogles, it's in his nature, and you should be pleased if he's taken the time to give you the eye. May West said “It's better to be looked over than overlooked.” It's my favorite saying of hers and it is so true when it comes to the Hairy werewolf. So accept his ogling as your due and have the confidence to smile knowingly at him when he finally raises those eyes to your own.

  I have a line I tell men when I catch them ogling me and I'm going to share it with you. It's simple but very effective and powerful. When he looks sheepish and apologizes, or makes any kind of comment acknowledging that you caught him, say, “Well, frankly, I wore this -insert outfit- knowing full well that it displayed my assets, I'd be more offended if you didn't look.” Usually this will be met with first a chuckle and then a widening of the eyes as they realize you're not one of those women who wears a plunging neckline only to snap a man's head off for appreciating it. I've had countless men tell me how incredible it was to find a woman honest enough to admit she wants attention and confident enough to know she deserves it.

  Howls at the Moon

  This is the adventurous werewolf, the one who feels the call of the wild deeply and runs off to Nature's waiting arms as often as he can. Many women think that they have to become thrill seekers or nature lovers in order to keep this man's attention. They drive down to the nearest Sports Authority and spend hundreds of dollars on every piece of equipment they might need, then show up to go camping with him and his buddies looking like an advertisement for LL Bean. Do not do this.

  The only exception is if you truly do love these things and want to go into the wild with him. If you are that woman, I have some advice for you. Don't let your hygiene go when you're out there. Men have an easier time of keeping certain areas clean, they're not as moist as us, and when you add the great outdoors into the equation, it gets even harder for us to keep smelling like a rose. If you fail in this endeavor, your werewolf will not return from the camping trip with thoughts of how wonderful it was to spend time with a woman who likes the things he does. No, all he'll be thinking about is how the heat in that tent made the smell of unclean vagina permeate everything. I apologize for the brutal honesty but I do this for your own good. Keep it clean in the evergreens!

  Now, if you're like the rest of us who can't stand camping unless it involves a proper bed and proper bathroom, then relax. He will appreciate you sending him off with a basket full of goodies for the trip much more than he'd appreciate any of your inauthentic endeavors to enjoy something that you don't. He will sense your misery and it will smell almost as bad as your sweaty you know what. So stay home and get drunk with your girlfriends...just don't drunken dial him because he will not appreciate you interrupting his communing with Nature. Let howling wolves howl.

  Mates For Life

  Oh it sounds good doesn't it? Mates for life, a man whose fidelity can be assured. A man who will never leave you. Yes, it is fantastic but like all good things in life, you must wait for the Mate for Lifer. This is the guy women complain about taking forever to propose, or even worse, living with them for years and then leaving. Yeah, that's definitely a risk here.

  This guy is serious about commitment and so takes a really long time to decide on it. Most women can't handle this, they're internal clocks are ticking like a bomb about to explode all over the poor werewolf. They need to know and they need to know now, are you going to marry me or what? Oh, I groan and shake my head. This is not the way to handle the Lifer wolf.

  Not that I don't think you should say something to your boyfriend after a few years of dating but please tread carefully with this monster. Sit him down and speak clearly and politely about how much you love him and feel that you'd like to continue the relationship. This will not be enough usually as werewolf men can be very obtuse. You'll have to get specific and come out and say that you'd like to know where he thinks things are going between you.

  It's even okay to voice your fears to him about having a time issue as far as children go. Hopefully by this time you've talked babies with him and you should both be on the same page as far as wanting them goes. If you haven't, well then this talk is long overdue. He will answer your questions honestly and as much as that can sometimes be crushing, it's good to know now rather than ten years down the road when you can no longer have children.

  This conversation could go several different ways, he could immediately assure you that he feels very strongly that you're the one for him and he just needs a little more time to be sure -in which case you have to decide whether he's worth waiting for. Or he could say that he's not sure if you're the perfect mate for him but he likes you a lot. What he will not do is lead you on or prevaricate. He will be clear as day and so should you.

  That being said, you may think this man has been leading you on because Mate For Lifers are also what I like to call Listers. They list all the things they want in a mate and have a tendency to check them off out loud. For example, you're having dinner, which you just cooked, and after enjoying a mouthful of your amazing lasagna he says; “I've always wanted to marry a woman who makes great lasagna.” Holy cow, you're thinking, he wants to marry me. Then four months down the road with no proposal in sight, you feel misled. He was not saying he was going to propose to you, he was merely checking off that item on his mate list. Makes great lasagna, check. Unfortunately he made the mistake of saying it to you, which he probably just thought was a compliment. I'm going to tell her that she fits one thing on my list, it will make her happy, he thinks. He has no idea that this will lead to your unhappiness.

  So if you're going to be with a werewolf Lister, be very careful not to take anything he says as fact until there's a date associated with it. For example, if he follows up the lasagna statement with a proposal, then go ahead and accept, otherwise be happy that you made the list and let it go.

  Shapeshifter

  The man of diversity, the Shapeshifting werewolf. This guy is often wrongly accused of lying to or misleading women. This is not completely true. He has more than one incarnation but in them all, he still retains a little of himself.

  Like the werewolf who shifts from man to beast, his wolf self still has a smidgen of humanity and his human self still carries a little of the wolf. These are not multiple personalities and they are not masks that he hides behind, they are all versions of himself. The woman that tames this beast must be calm, sensible, and reasonable.

  When speaking to the Shapeshifter, you must not waste his time talking about your day and every little event in it. If he happens to ask how your day was, keep it short and sweet. He can't take a woman's gossip or long stories about whatever nonsense is going on in your life. Not because he doesn't care but because he's got too much crap in his own head to deal with.

  You must be focused with this man, get to the point as quickly as possible and never, ever complain to him unless you want him to fix the problem. This goes for a lot of men, they're fixers and women don't want the problem fixed, they just need to unload, so there's already an issue there. We unload and they want to help but we're not looking for help, we're looking for compassion and agreement. Your man is not who you go to for that, call up one of your girlfriends and he will love you forever for being so thoughtful as to not unburden yourself on him.

  The Shapeshifter is that guy times ten. If you complain to him, he will make faces at you, start heading for the door, and then when he grabs his keys you will finally ask him what the hell he's doing. At which time he will give you his duh face and tell you he's off to beat up your manager who badmouthed you or whatever else he feels needs to be done to address your complaint. So I stress this again, do not complain to him unless this is the result you want.

  Now, when you speak to him about anything you want him to pay attention to, make sure you have his full attention. This wolf is not a multi-tasker, he can't mow the lawn and discuss what drapes you want to get for the living room and he can't drive you anywhere when you're prattling on about how you want to see The Lion King this weekend. He is focused on the task and with all the different hats he wears, this is hard enough with just one task. He can't divert his attention to you or he'll run over your kid's toy that was left on the lawn, or run into another car if he's driving. Do not distract him. Do what I call the “Sit and Smile”. He needs to know you're okay, that he can focus on whatever he's doing without having to worry about you. So when he glances at you, which he will because other women have yelled at him for ignoring them, give him a sweet smile and look as relaxed as possible. This will work miracles with your average Shapeshifter and you may overhear him singing your praises to his friends later that day.

  As far as his different personas go, get to know them all and take it as if it were how every man acts. You will bring a sense of normalcy to his life that the Shapeshifter desperately needs and he will cling to you with all his different personalities. Be the rock in his storm, the person he shifts around.

  Moonstruck

  Now we come to the truly wild werewolf, the hunter at best, the obsessive stalker at worst. If you find your man to be at the wrong end of this scale and don't enjoy being dominated, I recommend you move on.

  However, if your man is just your typical growling, grunting, predator, then you may end up being quite a lucky woman indeed. Okay, we're dealing with very old instincts here, this man is as close to the beast as you can get. You'll need to deal with him as you would a wild animal.

  First and foremost, you must allow him to chase. I mentioned earlier that all men love the chase but none more than the Moonstruck werewolf. He is the ultimate hunter and will not find any amount of satisfaction with you unless you've given him a good run first. So strap on your jogging shoes, girls(no, not literally) and start running. Do not, and I mean do not, ever chase this man. He will be turned off in seconds.

  That doesn't mean you can't encourage him though. He'll respond well to a three-second smile, ie; you look over your shoulder at him, make eye contact, and smile while you count in your head 1, 2, 3, and then look away. Any more is considered too aggressive by the Moonstruck wolf, any less is too ambivalent. He will not respond well to you sending him a drink or approaching him though. You must sit, smile, and wait. Stop complaining, it's a hell of a lot easier to sit and look pretty than it is to work up your courage to talk to a guy.