Nathan stretched his legs out, crossing them at the ankles. “We’ll be fine. No worries.”

  Dr. Green slowed down before entering the parking area. Nathan hopped out and went alone to the welcome center to pay for a camp spot.

  While Nathan was gone, I slid into the passenger seat where he had been sitting.

  Dr. Green stretched his arms over his head. “Well, we’re here.” He adjusted himself in the driver’s seat. “Do we want to set up camp first or go get something to eat?”

  Gabriel butted himself between me and Dr. Green, where I had been sitting before, peering out the front window at the camp around us. “Let’s take a walk around first and check out the neighborhood.”

  We waited for Nathan to get back. When he was inside the RV, he directed Dr. Green on how to get to the camp spot from a paper map he’d received.

  As we rolled deeper into the campground, there were plenty of empty camps. Our spot was a large flat patch of grass surrounded by trees. We were at the very end of the lane. It was unlikely anyone needed to go past our camping spot, so we were pretty secluded.

  Dr. Green backed the RV into place. The tires crunched loudly on gravel. He parked close to the tree line and shut off the engine. “Thank goodness,” he said. He massaged his own biceps. “Driving is fine, but I’m not used to the position this steering wheel is in. My arms ache.”

  Gabriel grabbed hold of my arm, pulling me toward the RV’s door. “Come on. Let’s look around.”

  Out in the open air, I took a deep breath, smelling the damp, cool breeze. There were no sounds other than wind rustling leaves and a couple birds chirping nearby.

  “This looks great,” Gabriel said, gazing around. He placed his hands on his hips. “A beautiful forest surrounding us, and lots of privacy, too.”

  “I think this will work,” Nathan said, coming up behind Gabriel and poking him in the shoulder. “At least you don’t need to worry about the spiders since we’re in the RV.”

  “Right.” Gabriel chuckled. “So, what do you guys want to do today?”

  “Explore first,” Nathan said. “See what’s here, and maybe find a trail or two we can hike on.”

  Dr. Green called to us from inside the RV. “Sure, don’t mind me. I’m just here with this big RV. Setting it up. Somehow...”

  “You’ve done enough already,” Luke said, laughing. “Come with us. Stretch your legs for a little while. We’ll just take a short look around, and then we’ll set up camp.”

  It took a moment for everyone to find a comfortable coat. I wore Luke’s and Gabriel had on North’s long black coat. With his punk style, it had him looking even more enigmatic. Luke ended up wearing a spare he had from a few years ago. He and I sort of matched as it was the same style. Nathan and Dr. Green came up with the thickest hoodies they could find.

  The five of us found a walking path that led to the campground’s amenities; showers, restrooms, laundry room, playground, pool, and a miniature golf course, currently closed and with dried leaves clustering over the course.

  Nathan forged on, enthusiastically getting ahead and then having to stop as the rest of us caught up.

  “We’re going to lose him,” Dr. Green whispered to me. “Just watch. He’ll be down a trail and gone.”

  I smiled to myself. We didn’t often have a lot of time for the things we loved, including Nathan wanting to be out in nature.

  Despite the chill in the air, it did feel wonderful to be outside, without pressure of the school or worries about our troubles. Crisp air. A few birds. Bare trees of winter. Plenty of time ahead of us to take advantage of.

  Nathan read the campground’s map and his blue eyes brightened. “There’s something called Sliding Rock. You can totally slide down some big, smooth rocks into a pool. We should go.”

  “Are you shitting me?” Gabriel said. “It’s fucking February. We’re out here in coats.”

  “But it’s not that bad. It probably stays the same temperature all year.” Nathan gestured to the rest of the park. “Besides, it’s not far. Come on.”

  Luke and Gabriel seemed to hesitate, but Dr. Green nudged their shoulders to keep them moving. “We can at least let him go look at it. Don’t be party poopers.”

  We all followed Nathan as he walked off. He led us through the campgrounds toward the entrance to the hiking trails. One in particular had signs indicating it would lead to Sliding Rock.

  Only within a few minutes, Nathan suddenly stopped dead. “Oh, shit.” He muttered under his breath.

  “What?” I asked him.

  He didn’t answer, and following his gaze, I didn’t see what he was looking at, at least not at first.

  Not until Gabriel behind me said, “Shi-i-it.” He extended his arm and pointed ahead of us.

  At first, it appeared there was someone standing near the edge of the path we were on. What was the big deal?

  It took me way too long to realize the black fuzzy appearance on the outside was not someone wearing a coat.

  The bear stood hunched over, nosing at plants near it, and gazing large amber eyes occasionally in our direction.

  We were still a length away. The bear didn’t move. Neither did we.

  “We should back off,” Nathan said quietly. “It’ll probably wander away.”

  I stepped backward. My heart raced. I was a little worried if we moved, that it would chase after us.

  “Let’s go back to the RV,” Dr. Green said. “Maybe we should call the rangers’ office?”

  Nathan shook his head. “We can call and let them handle it, but...” He cut himself off when the bear stood up taller, looking in our direction. It made a low hounding noise. “Run!” Nathan yelled, grabbing my hand.

  I gasped and stumbled along with everyone else. The bear didn’t take off after us. And by the time we got back to where the restrooms were, it was out of sight.

  “That was close.” Dr. Green breathed hard, combing his hands through his now wild hair sticking out all over the place.

  Gabriel pressed his palms to his forehead. “Holy shit! That thing was huge!”

  Nathan chuckled. “We were miles away. I just didn’t want to be still standing there if he got curious.”

  Luke was wide eyed and grasping at his sides. “North always said to watch out for the bears. Didn’t think we’d see one.”

  “That’s it,” Gabriel said loudly. “We’re staying in the RV. No one goes outside alone today.”

  “That’s always a camp rule,” Nathan said.

  “For a good reason,” Dr. Green said. He turned to Luke. “I don’t suppose North said how to keep bears away.”

  Luke rubbed the back of his neck with a palm. “I could ask, but we shouldn’t be calling each other if we can help it. Or we can look it up.

  Nathan crossed his arms over his chest and smirked. “I’m right here. I know a few things about the outdoors. You don’t always have to call North.”

  Luke planted his hands on his hips and leaned in to mock Nathan a little. “Okay, Mr. Outdoors. Tell us how we keep the bear away.”

  “There’s probably a bear spray in the RV,” Nathan said. “If not, we can go to town and get some. I’ll walk up to the park office in a minute to go let them know about it lingering around.”

  “Not alone,” Gabriel chided.

  We moved as a group back to the RV. “Maybe we shouldn’t have parked so far away from other people,” I said. “It might not be as interested in us if we’re around other people.”

  “Don’t worry about it.” Nathan reached to put his big hand on the small of my back as we walked across the camp. “No harm done. He’s probably gone already, and letting the park manager know, they’ll be able to do things to ward it off further. But when you’re in nature, you have to expect to meet nature. It’s kind of part of the experience.”

  Dr. Green put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed gently. With Nathan still holding my back, it was an odd experience to have them both hanging on to me. “Yeah. That was the scary part. Now’s the fun part. Let’s set up camp.”

  With the RV, it didn’t really take too long. Nathan and Luke ran off to the park management station to talk to them about the bear. I read the RV manual out loud and instructed as Dr. Green and Luke figured out how to extend the RV and hook it up for electric and sewer.

  By the time Nathan and Luke got back, the RV was set up fully.

  The inside of the RV had expanded, so when I thought of it being large before, it seemed massive now. Mostly, it gave more space in the middle, separating the two facing settees, and then in the bedroom, gave more walking space between the bed and the wall.

  Luke opened the large French door fridge. I peered in from behind him, looking inside. There were some eggs and other ingredients already. I leaned a cheek against Luke’s shoulder. “I guess we get to pick what we want for breakfast,” I said.

  “That’s the plan,” Luke said, and he tilted his head, so it was partially leaning against mine. “Chocolate chip pancakes it is. And for now, we can take it easy.” He pulled out cans of tuna fish, crackers, bread and cheese. “Are we good with grilled cheese and tuna salad on crackers?”

  Everyone seemed to agree with this except for Gabriel. He didn’t answer, lost in thought, sitting in the dining nook, gazing out the window.

  I didn’t want to bother him. This was going to be a long trip and he was going to be discovering is own family, too. As much as I was trying to get over the idea of possibly meeting my family, I needed to remember he was going through probably the same type of concerns I was feeling.

  I was a bit embarrassed about earlier when he’d been asking me questions. The first one I hadn’t even heard correctly, or so I thought, but I didn’t want to appear like I wasn’t paying attention. I just reacted.

  Too distracted by thinking so deeply about what might happen. Worrying about everything.

  Is that why he was asking me if anything was bothering me earlier? I suddenly realized maybe he’d needed to talk to me. I should have asked him what he was feeling.

  I kept thinking of what to say way too late.

  Dr. Green came up behind me and nudged me gently. “Hey, come help me with something outside. I want to set up some bear defense.”

  I followed Dr. Green out of the RV. The grass around our campground was a little tall but manageable. There was a barren firepit and some big rocks and logs had been placed around it for seating. Otherwise, it was just a flat, open field with a narrow spot of gravel for the RV to sit on.

  He opened a side panel, revealing storage underneath the RV. Inside were a couple rows of neatly organized bins that held a lot of supplies.

  The Academy was always ready.

  Dr. Green, despite having driven all day, seemed cheerful. He adjusted the hoodie he was wearing, a light blue color. It seemed a great color on him. He pulled one tub out, trying to read the list that had been taped to the top of what was inside, and then searched through the contents. “How are you holding up, Sang?” he asked me.

  “I’m okay. A little nervous. But excited, too. Meeting family... I mean, I know I maybe won’t talk to them directly.”

  His green eyes sparked with amusement and he curled a finger to push away some of his wavy, blond locks that fell into his face. “You always have a choice, you know. In fact, in your case, I like Owen’s plan to send someone else in first. If you go to visit, we can still disguise you if you want to meet them without them recognizing you, but I recommend we do that after an initial meeting by someone else.”

  That plan sounded much better to me, at least from where we were standing. Gabriel’s family was simpler to navigate. They already knew Gabriel, knew he was alive. From what I understood, he simply hadn’t seen them in years and with Academy initiation, he had to complete the process to graduate.

  Since I needed to recover information, but my relatives hadn’t had contact and there was a slim chance they didn’t even know if I was alive, or even existed, there was no way to simply walk in and reintroduce myself. To keep myself a secret for my ghost bird status, I couldn’t allow myself to be discovered.

  Dr Green continued, “You can meet them at any point, and as yourself, if you’d like...”

  I shuffled my feet where I stood, swallowing once before I spoke again. “I need to protect my identity,” I said. “It’s why we’re on this trip, isn’t it?”

  “Of course.” He redirected his full attention to me, wrapping an arm around my shoulder supportively, holding me near him. “But it’s not the only option. I’m with you no matter what, Sang. And family... I mean, it’s your family. And Academy supports whatever choices you want to make for yourself. There’s no wrong answer here, except not following your heart.”

  I swallowed a couple of times, trying to picture my mother’s face. As far as I knew, she was the only one I wanted to learn about.

  What really happened to her?

  How exactly did she die?

  And why was I given to my father?

  “I feel like I know what I want,” I said gently, shifting my eyes as I deeply considered what I wanted to say. “If they had wanted me before now, they would have reached out, wouldn’t they?” I was too nervous to even consider meeting anyone at this point.

  When North became concerned that the possibility of me being a ghost bird meant I’d have to face off with cults, I felt more confident about that than I did about meeting my own family.

  Dr. Green massaged my shoulder soothingly. “I’m not worried about what they want. I just want to know what you want. And it’s okay not to know yet. Or maybe you’re right, and we hide who you are and we only collect documents.” He squeezed me closer to him, and his voice came to me in more of a whisper. “Pookie, I just wanted you to know, we’re here for you. So you can tell us what you want to do here. You’re in charge.”

  My eyes watered a little at his kindness. “I don’t have an answer. I want to get it over with and I want to avoid it all at the same time.”

  “We have time before we get there, and even when we get to Kentucky and we actually find out where they live, we can still hold back and make decisions. We can’t expect you to know the answers without seeing it for yourself.” He leaned his head in until the top of his forehead touched mine. “I’m here for you, Pookie.”

  My fingertips twitched. He was sensing I was getting nervous. I suspected that’s why he asked me to come out here with him, for this pep talk.

  He knew. I didn’t spend as much time with him as the others, but his awareness of me and my feelings warmed my heart.

  His smile widened. He kissed me lightly on the lips, lingering a moment longer before pulling away.

  “All right.” Dr. Green straightened up, putting his hands behind his back again. “Now, these tubs of supplies should have some... spray to ward off bears...?”

  He picked up one of the spray bottles from one of the bins and examined it closely. Then he handed it to me. “Here. Take this.”

  It wasn’t the one we were looking for, and we were careful to pull out items a few at a time and then put them back in the right bins so we didn’t mess up the inventory sheets.

  Eventually, he found one and handed it to me.

  I took the bottle from him carefully, examining it. The label read bear defense and pictured a bear running away. I summarized the directions on the back. “Spray this on trees and bushes to deter bears... Keep children away during application... Don’t spray directly on skin or eyes. And don’t spray directly at a bear.”

  “You heard the bottle,” Dr. Green said. He took the spray from me. “You go keep the kids inside. I’ll spray the perimeter.”

  I went back to the RV with a bit more confidence about this trip. I didn’t have to do anything I didn’t want to and going up didn’t have to mean I meet anyone at all. I just needed to see for myself.

  Going to Kentucky was one thing, but we had to survive our way up there first. I hoped the spray worked.

  ♥♥♥

  That evening, after several games of cards, a quick dinner, and some cleaning up and reorganizing, I fell into the queen bed, exhausted. I’d changed into shorts and a T-shirt, and I just wanted to get under blankets and make a cocoon.

  I was half asleep when I smelled cypress and felt Nathan sliding into bed next to me. His leather scent faded now that he’d moved out of his father’s house.

  And I realized as I was drifting that Nathan didn’t have a similar issue like this, where he was off to visit extended family like Gabriel.

  He never mentioned.

  Nathan’s hand drifted over my cheek. It surprised me and I breathed in sharply, blinking. I’d been in deep thought staring in his direction but not actually looking at him.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  I breathed in deeply and out slowly again in an effort to gain a bit of energy to be able to express my thoughts. “Why did you not go look for your mom? After joining the Academy?” I wished there was a gentler way to ask. His mother had left after she had enough of his father’s abuse, but she hadn’t taken Nathan with her. If he joined the Academy since, he’d have to do the same thing Gabriel was doing, wouldn’t he?

  In the dark, Nathan rolled onto his back, and pressed his palms up against his forehead, elbows up. Slowly the palms drifted down to cover his eyes. “I’ve thought about it. And I know the Academy is taking care of her. I suspect Mr. Blackbourne has the address and is just waiting for me to say something.” He dropped his arms to his sides and turned his head to look at me. “I’m not ready. She left, I think, because she thought my dad wouldn’t abuse me like he did her. And she was penniless and homeless, so taking a kid with her would make it harder.”

  “And you can adopt people even if you don’t go to see them?” I whispered.

  “From a distance, yes. I wouldn’t get progress reports like some people in the Academy do. Because... I think the longer she’s doing well and she doesn’t come back to look for me, I think... there has to be a reason she doesn’t. Maybe she will when she’s ready. Maybe I’ll go talk to her one day.” His gaze shifted so he was looking at the ceiling. His voice deepened in tone. “Maybe I’m worried I’ll find out another reason and it isn’t what I think it is. And maybe I haven’t forgiven her for leaving me behind yet.”