“I don’t love her anymore, if that’s what you’re thinking.” When he seemed satisfied that his words had finally registered with Kristen, he admitted, “I’m not sure that I ever really did.”

  “Then why are you telling me this?” She pulled her hair away from her face.

  “Because I need you to know the truth.” He looked torn. “It would have been that easy for you… to walk out on me?”

  “What did you expect me to do?” she cried, not caring that her voice was carrying. “You just told me your ex was back and she wanted another shot with you. I assumed you were going to tell me you wanted the same thing.”

  “So you would have just given up on us?”

  Confused, she asked, “What would you expect me to do? Fight for you?” She was stunned when he seemed to contemplate the question like the idea actually had merit. “This isn’t a game to me. I’m not interested in competing for you like some stupid high school cheerleader.”

  “I guess that’s where you and I differ then,” Matt said, standing.

  Kristen got the impression she’d disappointed him, though she couldn’t say why. He claimed to want a meaningful relationship with a mature woman, yet he was upset that she hadn’t proven her love by going to war with his ex-wife? “What are you talking about?”

  “If Robert thought about trying to get you back, I’d beat him to within an inch of his miserable life.”

  Kristen gasped, shocked by the hostility she heard beneath his deceptively calm tone. As she watched him walk away, she couldn’t help but wonder what the hell just happened and where they stood.

  ***

  Matt was holed away in the manager’s office, hiding out before the party. Kristen hadn’t returned yet, and since Shell was making sure everything went smoothly, he couldn’t even be sure Kristen would come back. He knew it was totally irrational for him to want her to be jealous. She was right. They weren’t kids caught up in a game. They were mature adults trying to build a lasting relationship. It still hurt that she would have walked away from him without a backward glance.

  “There you are,” Jaxon said, poking his head in the door. “The place looks great, man. Your girlfriend really outdid herself.”

  “Yeah, she did,” Matt said, rapping his knuckles on the unforgiving wood.

  “Uh oh, I know that look. What happened?”

  “Come on in and close door.”

  Jaxon obliged before crossing the room and sinking into the chair across from Matt. “So who died?”

  “Not who, but what might be the better question.” With a heavy sigh and heavier heart, Matt said, “Potentially my relationship with Kris, but I sure as hell hope not.” Tipping his head back, he looked at the ceiling and noted the over-priced painter’s mishaps. He didn’t give a damn though. “I really believe this is the real deal, man. I think she’s the one. I didn’t realize how tired I was of being alone until she came into my life.”

  “Let’s face it, you’ve been alone as long as I’ve known you, and that includes the time you spent married to that piranha.”

  Jaxon was in no position to pass judgment—his bedroom had a revolving door—but that didn’t mean Matt wouldn’t listen to his friend’s opinion. He needed a sounding board, someone to help him put his mess into perspective. “I’ve had other relationships. A few of them lasted.” If eight or ten months qualified. “They weren’t all like Robin.”

  “Weren’t they?” Jaxon raised an eyebrow. “Seems to me they all wore same suit, just in varying sizes and colors.”

  His friend could be right. Matt didn’t know anymore. “But Kris isn’t like that. She’s—”

  “I know she’s not,” Jaxon cut in. “Anyone can see that. She’s the first sincere woman you’ve ever dated, at least that I know of.”

  “How do you know that?”

  “She’s spent a fair bit of time here planning the party. Our paths have crossed a few times, and we’ve talked.”

  “And?” Matt knew there was more to the story, and his patience was in short supply.

  “She’s amazing.” Looking Matt in the eye, he said, “I’m not the only one who thinks so. Any one of the boys would trade places with you in a heartbeat.”

  Matt clenched his jaw. He knew there would be a line of men waiting to take his place if Kristen chose to walk away from him. “You don’t think I know that?”

  “Then why the hell are you moping around in here when you should be busy worshiping the ground that woman walks on?”

  It wasn’t like Jaxon to put any woman up on a pedestal. He wasn’t disrespectful, but he never met anyone he felt was worth the effort. Apparently Kristen was an exception to the rule.

  “We got into it earlier. I don’t even know if she’s gonna be here tonight,” Matt said.

  “What the hell happened?”

  “Robin’s back in town. She showed up at my place this morning, just after Kris left.”

  Jaxon’s chiseled jaw hardened, and his eyes darkened. “What did that bitch want?”

  Matt didn’t even blanch at his friend’s characterization. “She said she made a mistake, that she wants me back.”

  Jaxon cracked his knuckles with a series of pops. “I hope you told her to go to hell.”

  “Basically.” He’d told her they had nothing left to say to each other and he never wanted to see her again.

  “Good,” Jaxon said with a decisive nod. “Does Kristen know she stopped by to see you?”

  “That’s what we got into it about.”

  “Can’t say I’m surprised. She was jealous, huh?”

  “No, that’s just it. She wasn’t. I told her Robin was back, and she barely flinched when she offered to step aside so I could go back to my ex.” Matt still felt his blood boil when he thought about how cavalier she’d been.

  “Really?” Jaxon asked, looking thoughtful.

  “If that was me and her ex-fiancé wanted her back, he’d have a hell of a fight. You think that means she’s just not that into me?” Matt couldn’t afford to get invested in a relationship with a woman who could never fully commit to him. He’d been there, done that, and still had the colorful blemish on his arm to prove it.

  “I think she’s being cautious. She’s been hurt before, and she doesn’t want to go there again.”

  “She’s talked to you about Robert?” Matt asked, unable to hide his surprise. Neither Jaxon nor Kristen had given him any indication they’d become so close.

  “Yeah, she told me what happened.” He looked a little uncomfortable. “It was no big deal. We were having coffee one day, and I asked her why an amazing girl like her was still single. That’s when she told me about him.”

  “Clearly he’s an idiot,” Matt said, feeling angry all over again.

  “You’ll get no argument from me on that one.”

  “Did you get the feeling she’s ready to put all that behind her?” Matt was a little embarrassed asking his friend to answer a question he should have been able to answer himself. “That she’s ready to move on with me?”

  “Definitely,” Jaxon said. He looked Matt in the eye. “She admitted that what she feels for you scares her, but she’s never felt this way about anyone, not even that dude she planned to marry.”

  A slow smile spread across Matt’s face as the knot in his gut eased. “She really said that?”

  “She sure did.”

  “Then why do you think she seemed so unaffected when I told her Robin was back?”

  “I think her pride’s been stomped on a time or two, and she’s trying to prevent that from happening again. I can’t say that I blame her. Trust me, no matter how she may have reacted, that woman is in love with you.”

  “Thanks,” Matt said, jumping out of his chair. He slapped Jaxon’s back as he walked past. “That’s exactly what I needed to hear.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Kristen didn’t know if she should show her face at High Rollers’ anniversary party, but she was a professional. She knew how important the event was to Matt. So even though Shell was there, Kristen forced herself to swallow her anxiety, slip into the killer heels and designer dress she’d bought especially for the event, and walk in with her head held high.

  She hadn’t even had an opportunity to ask her crew for a briefing before Matt made a beeline for her. He looked gorgeous in a black suit and dress shirt with the collar left open just enough to reveal a hint of the gold chain he always wore.

  “I was worried you wouldn’t come,” he said, stopping just short of touching her.

  Kristen’s heart twisted a little when she realized how much she wanted him to touch her… to pull her into his arms, kiss her, and whisper that everything would be fine because he loved her and that wouldn’t change no matter who tried to come between them.

  “I wanted to make sure y’all were happy—”

  “I’m not happy,” he said quietly. “In fact, I’ve been pretty miserable ever since you left.”

  “Me too,” she admitted. Her misery was probably stamped all over her face.

  “Can we slip into the office and talk for a bit?”

  With a quick glance around the room, she saw that everything was under control. The place was packed, and everyone seemed to be having a good time. Photographers and reporters were milling about, famous faces graced every corner of the room, laughter could be heard above the live music, and food and drinks were circulating.

  “Sure, I can spare a few minutes.” She didn’t want him to know that she’d been anticipating their conversation. She knew they would see each other that night and they wouldn’t be able to avoid having a conversation about their future. Her stomach clenched as she thought about where his head and heart might be.

  “Great.” Looking relieved, he took her hand and led her to the manager’s office in the back. He closed the door before facing her. “I’m sorry about what happened earlier.”

  “It’s not your fault your ex—”

  “I’m not apologizing that she stopped by. Believe me, I let her know we’re never getting back together.”

  Kristen knew the conviction in his voice should put her mind at ease, but she sensed there was more he wasn’t telling her, so before she got her hopes up, she prompted him to continue. “But?”

  “But I wanted you to feel something…” Looking frustrated, he turned his back and crossed the room. “I wanted you to care.”

  “I did care.” She was stunned he hadn’t picked up on how much she cared. She’d done her best to salvage her pride in front of him, but she never guessed he hadn’t seen right through her act. “How can you think otherwise?”

  He rounded the desk, using it as a barrier between them. “I just know that if our situations were reversed, I’d have been tearing your ex a new one.”

  “So you thought I should have hunted Robin down and what? Warned her to stay away from you?” Since the immediate threat to their relationship had passed, Kristen couldn’t help but see the humor in the situation. She was afraid of caring too much, and in the process, she’d let Matt believe she didn’t care at all.

  “No, I just…” Looking embarrassed, he sank into the swivel chair with his head down and shoulders slumped. “Damn it, I don’t know what I was expecting, but it sure as hell wasn’t the reaction I got. You were prepared to just walk away, and I’m not gonna lie. That hurt like hell.”

  Rounding the desk, she turned his chair until he faced her. Sliding into his lap as gracefully as she could, she linked her arms around his neck and locked eyes with him. “I’m in love with you.” She gave him a minute to absorb her words. “I’ve never trusted anyone enough to give my heart completely. I always held back a little, believing it would hurt less if he disappointed me, but I can see now how wrong I was.”

  He slid a hand up her thigh to rest on her hip. “I get that you’re scared, baby. I am too, but I’m more afraid of losing you than I am of taking a chance on us.”

  “I feel the same way.” She tipped her forehead to rest against his. “I went back and forth all day thinking about what I would say when I saw you, and it always came back to one thing. I love you, and I don’t want to lose you.” Kristen had never been so vulnerable, yet she didn’t feel fearful. Matt’s strong arms around her acted like an anchor, making her believe that nothing and no one could take her down with him there.

  “That’s all I needed to hear.” He placed an index finger under her chin. “I’ve wasted so many years chasing some stupid ideal. I was trying to prove something, whether to myself or the rest of the world, I don’t know. The only thing I know is that it always slipped through my fingers. I could never seem to hold on tight enough. I’m not gonna let you slip away, Kris.”

  She smiled. “I have no intention of trying to get away.”

  “I know I can’t hold on to you.” He sighed. “I get that. Holding on too tight will only make you want to leave. I have to trust that you’ll want to stay with me no matter how many temptations cross your path. I have to believe that I’ll be enough to make you want to come home to our bed at night.”

  Kristen got so caught up in his reference to their shared bed that she almost missed his reference to other men. “How can you think I would want anyone else?” His ex-wife really must have done a number on him if he questioned his ability to keep his partner satisfied. Any woman would give up everything she owned for a chance with a guy like Matt.

  “Look at you,” he said, gesturing to the dress that fit her like a second skin. “You were my fantasy girl, the one person I never thought I’d have a chance with.” He closed his eyes as though he couldn’t stand to confront the truth. “Part of me that wonders if this is too good to be true. If you’re going to wake up one day and realize this was a mistake, that you didn’t really know me at all.”

  Kristen couldn’t make sense of his reservations. She knew everything she needed to know about him. “I have a proposition for you. Let’s pretend we just met. I want to forget the past. Yours, mine, and ours.”

  “As great as that sounds, I don’t know if we can do that, baby. There are things about me, things you should probably know before you decide whether you really wanna be in this for the long haul.”

  “The only thing that matters to me is the man you are, not the man you used to be.” She knew Matt had faults just like everyone else, but she also knew he had a good heart. She could trust him, and he would never hurt her or anyone else he cared about. To her, the only things that mattered were trust and honesty, and she knew he represented both. She could count on him when it felt like the rest the world was against her.

  “I want to believe that,” he whispered as he tightened his arms around her. “You don’t know how much I want to believe that.”

  Before Kristen could respond, someone knocked on the door.

  “Come in,” Matt said, holding firm when Kristen tried to wiggle off his lap.

  A young man wearing a suit and tie with a gold nametag pinned to his lapel poked his head in the door, blushing when he saw Kristen. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I need you out front for a minute, boss.”

  “Be right there, Jer.” Matt waited for the door to close. “Can we continue this conversation later, maybe at my place?”

  Kristen knew he was asking whether they were okay, whether she would go home with him. The answer was an unequivocal yes. Whatever life threw at them, they could handle it. “Sounds like a plan.”

  ***

  Kristen was making her rounds, making sure all of the guests were having a good time, when a stunning blonde in a blue strapless dress reached for her arm.

  “You’re Kristen, right?”

  Fearing the woman may have her sights set on Matt, Kristen stiffened her back, preparing to do battle. “Yes, and you are?”

  “Rennie Foster.” She nodded toward a group of professional baseball players engaged in a spirited game of pool. “Zach’s my husband. He said y’all have met a couple of times. You’re Matt’s girlfriend, right?”

  “Yes.” Kristen relaxed into a genuine smile an extended her hand. “It’s nice to finally meet you, Rennie. I’ve heard so many wonderful things about you from both Zach and Matt.”

  “Same goes,” Rennie said, winking. “I haven’t known Matt all that long, but I’ve never seen him as happy as he’s been since you two started seeing each other.” She nudged Kristen’s elbow. “You’re obviously good for him.”

  Kristen caught Matt’s eye from across the room and felt the heat from his appreciative gaze all the way to the tips of her brightly painted toes. “He’s good for me too.”

  “Uh oh.” Rennie turned her back to the door and brought her glass of white wine to her lips.

  “What’s wrong?” Kristen expected to see the doormen doing battle with potential party crashers.

  “Have you met Matt’s brother yet?”

  Then Kristen saw him… and the exotic-looking creature on his arm who looked exactly like Matt’s tattoo. “Is that—”

  “Robin?” Rennie sighed. “I’m afraid so. I can’t imagine why he’d bring her here. He knows Matt can’t stand her.” She touched Kristen’s arm in a show of support. “It’s true, you know. He wants nothing more to do with her. No matter what she might tell you—”

  “It’s okay, I know the story.”

  “You do?” Rennie looked relieved. “I wasn’t sure if Matt would tell you, but I’m glad he did. I know it looks bad for him, but it really was her fault. If she hadn’t—” Rennie stopped suddenly. “What exactly did Matt tell you about Robin?”

  “Just that she was back in town.” Trying to force words past her dry lips, she said, “But it sounds like there’s a lot more I need to know. Care to tell me?”

  “I can’t.” She looked as if she’d just stepped into a plot of quicksand she feared may swallow her whole. “I’m sorry. I’d like to, but that’s a conversation for you to have with Matt.” She looked behind her, eyeing the group Matt had been standing with. “Speaking of Matt, where did he go? He’s going to want to deal with those two before they can do any damage.”