“What does this have to do with my father?” Sabrina asked.

  “A lot more than you might realize.” Jaxon smiled. “I’ve been through enough therapy to know that we all carry a lot of baggage from our childhood along with us.”

  “Yeah, but I didn’t have a bad childhood. I was always close with both of my parents.” She couldn’t tell Jaxon about her recent rift with her father.

  “Yeah, but was your old man always there when you needed him?”

  “He worked a lot.”

  “So the answer is no, he wasn’t?”

  “No, but my mother was always there. It’s not like I had no one.” Sabrina had no reason to complain. A lot of kids grew up in much worse situations than she did.

  “I’m not trying to assign blame,” Jaxon said. “I’m just trying to help you figure out how you may have come to the conclusion that you may not be a good parent.”

  Sabrina couldn’t help but smile. She’d never seen this introspective side of Jaxon. “Okay, Dr. Freud, give me your take on it.”

  He rolled his tongue in his cheek, trying to keep a straight face. “I think you saw your father putting all of his time and attention into the business he loved, and that didn’t leave a lot of time for his wife and children.”

  “That’s true, but I wasn’t resentful,” she said. “He was doing what he had to do to support his family.”

  “Sure, he was, but isn’t it possible you saw that example and subconsciously vowed you’d never be the kind of parent he was?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Come on, Sabrina, you can’t tell me there weren’t times you wished he’d been there for you when he wasn’t.”

  “Sure, but every kid feels that way from time to time,” she said.

  “So maybe you decided a long time ago that you had to choose between a career and a family, and you chose your career.”

  “I suppose so.”

  “But I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to choose.” He took her hands. “Honey, you can have it all. Millions of women do. Dylan is in a great place right now. He has five business partners to pick up any slack. We all do. That’s what makes things at our company work so well.”

  Sabrina knew what it would mean to her to have her brother on board, so she could understand that. “Yeah, but—”

  “Just hear me out. You may not be there for every dance recital or Little League game. You may not be there for every bedtime story or bath time. That just means you have to make the most of the ones you are there for.”

  Tears trickled down her cheeks when she pictured bedtime stories and bath times. She’d never thought about those things before, never thought she wanted them, but now she wasn’t sure she wanted to miss them.

  “Do you really want to miss out on every moment of your child’s life? You want to let the man you love raise your child without you?” Jaxon stood and kissed Sabrina’s forehead. “I’m going to let you rest now. I just wanted to give you something to think about, sweetheart. You know if you ever need to talk, I’m just a phone call away.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Two weeks had passed since Dylan walked out on Sabrina, and he’d never been more miserable. His lawyer had sent her the papers to relinquish her parental rights and give him full custody of the baby she was carrying, but she’d failed to respond. He was questioning what that meant. Was she having second thoughts?

  Jaxon stormed into Dylan’s office and tossed a newspaper at him. “Did you know about this?”

  Dylan gaped at the front page. Sabrina’s picture was positioned alongside Bell’s, and the caption read, Bell’s Agent Blows the Whistle. “Wow, she went through with it.”

  “Then you did know?” Jaxon paced, thrusting his hands through his hair. “And you didn’t think to say anything? You had to know we’d all want a piece of him.”

  Jaxon had been pretty reserved with Dylan lately, and Dylan had to assume it was because his friend related to Sabrina’s struggle to come to terms with her pregnancy. While Jaxon was excited about the baby Sela was carrying, he hadn’t always been so stoked about being a father. Dylan assumed he saw Sabrina as a kindred spirit.

  “It was Sabrina’s story to tell, not mine, and believe me, I got a piece of that asshole. Did you really think I’d let him get away with that?”

  “I don’t know.” Jaxon stopped pacing and settled his hands on the back of the chair facing Dylan’s desk. “I thought I knew you, but the way you’re handling this situation with Sabrina makes me wonder.”

  “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

  “You’ve been moping for the past two weeks. When you’re not biting someone’s head off, you’re sulking like a two-year-old.”

  “Don’t judge me. You don’t know what I’m going through.”

  “What you’re going through?” Jaxon shouted. “What about what the woman you supposedly love is going through? She was raped! She’s pregnant with a baby she never expected, and the man she loves walked out on her, leaving her to deal with all of it on her own!”

  Shit. When Jaxon put it that way, Dylan felt like the lowest form of life. “You don’t think this is killing me? You know how I feel about Sabrina. I’ve never felt about anyone the way I feel about her.” He swiped a hand over his mouth, trying to regain control of his emotions. “All I’ve ever wanted is to build a life with her.”

  “Yeah, but you want it on your terms. You want to marry her. You want her to have your babies. What about what she wants?”

  Dylan closed his eyes as Jaxon’s words sank in. “I hear what you’re saying, but—”

  Jaxon glared at him. “Do you? Really? I’ve known Sabrina a long time, and she’s not a selfish bitch.”

  Dylan winced every time he thought of the vile words he’d said to her the night he left her house. “I know she’s not.”

  “She’s been a good friend to me, to all of us. She was one of the people who helped us build the business by spreading the word to all of her clients and associates. There was nothing in it for her. She did it because she liked us and wanted to see us succeed. I haven’t forgotten that. I owe Sabrina a lot, and so do you.”

  Dylan sucked in a breath. As much as it hurt to admit, his friend was right. He wanted to tune Jaxon out, but Jaxon was saying what he needed to hear, whether he liked it or not.

  “You think she’s selfish? Try looking in the mirror. All I’ve heard from you for the past year is how frustrated you are that things with Sabrina aren’t where you want them to be. You already had it all, and you were just too stupid to see it. You’ve been in love with that girl since you first laid eyes on her.” Jaxon sat across from Dylan, lowering his voice. “You finally had her. She was sharing your bed. She was in love with you, talking about the possibility of spending your lives together, and you blew it.”

  “I just—”

  “Stop talking and listen.” When Jaxon seemed satisfied Dylan was going to keep his mouth shut, he said, “You wanted it all, and you wanted it on your timetable. If you ask me, you were the one being selfish.”

  “You don’t understand.” Only Dylan was afraid Jaxon understood better than anybody.

  “She’s been through hell the last few months,” Jaxon said, gesturing toward the folded newspaper on the desk. “Instead of standing by her when she needed you most, you threw a temper tantrum and stormed out, leaving her to deal with this shitstorm on her own.” Jaxon took a breath. “Can you even imagine how much courage it took for her to go to the police?”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  “No, you don’t.” Jaxon glared at him. “She’s well-respected in this town. She’s at the top of her field. If professional athletes aren’t represented by her, they want to be. You think it’s easy for a woman, especially one who looks like Sabrina, to gain a foothold in professional sports?”

  “No, I know it’s not.”

  “And you just expect her to give it all up so she can stay home and have babies?”

  “Don’t be a jackass. I never said that.” Dylan was getting pissed. “I know how hard Sabrina’s worked to get where she is. I’d never ask her to give that up.”

  “Really? Is that what you told her when you found out she was pregnant?”

  “No, but—”

  “Did you tell her that you loved her? That you knew the timing of this pregnancy was terrible, but you’d get through it together?”

  Dylan should have said all those things, because they were true, but he hadn’t. Instead, he’d lashed out and run away.

  “Did you tell her that you knew she’d been through hell and back after the rape and the last thing she’d expected was to become a mama?”

  “No.” Dylan hung his head, unable to look his friend in the eye.

  “Did you tell her that you’d help her in any way you could? Did you suggest y’all hire a nanny or maybe that she could have a daycare at her office so she wouldn’t have to be apart from the baby during the day?”

  “No.”

  “Did you try to calm her down? Did you listen to her fears? Did you even care about what she was thinking or feeling?”

  Dylan pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. “I was angry. I wanted her to want that baby as much as I do, and when she didn’t, it felt like a slap in the face. It felt like she was telling me she didn’t want me or the life I’d been so desperate to build with her.”

  “You guys are having a baby together, and that baby needs to be your number one priority. You need to decide, together, where to go from here.” Jaxon sighed. “But I don’t know if Sabrina will want anything more to do with you. Frankly, I wouldn’t blame her if she told you to go to hell.”

  Dylan tipped his head back, staring at the ceiling. “Neither would I.” He’d been so focused on what he wanted only because he’d been afraid to consider the possibility she didn’t want him or their baby.

  “She probably has reporters camped out on her doorstep right now, demanding answers about what happened with Bell. That kind of stress can’t be good for your baby.”

  “You’re right.” He clenched his fist.

  “You need to man up, get your ass over there, and tell her you’ll be there to support her through this.”

  “What if she kicks me out?”

  Jaxon smirked. “I would if I were her. You’re dealing with one tough lady, my friend. She doesn’t need you or anyone else to take care of her, but it’s your job to prove to her that her life is still better with you in it.”

  “You’re right.” Dylan jumped up, grabbing his car keys from his desk drawer. “Thanks for the kick in the ass, man. I needed it.”

  “Hey, that’s what I’m here for.”

  ***

  Sabrina was curled up in her bed, trying to ignore the commotion in her driveway. Reporters had been outside all day, making her plan to work from home pointless. Wherever she went, they would stalk her until she’d made a statement about the rape. She knew that when she’d decided to press charges against Bell, and now she had to face the music.

  She stood to look at herself in the full-length mirror. Turning to the side, she smoothed a hand over her stomach. She was only two months pregnant, but soon she would have a little bump that would only add to the questions surrounding the case. People would want to know whether the baby she was carrying was Bell’s. Thankfully, that wasn’t possible. She’d still been on the pill then, and Bell had worn a condom. There was no doubt who the father of her baby was… the one man she hoped she’d never have to see again.

  The doorbell rang, startling her. Since she knew it was probably a reporter, she opted to ignore it.

  “Sabrina!”

  She rounded the corner to see Dylan walking down the hall. “What the hell are you doing here? You have no right to walk into my house like you own the goddamn place! How did you get in?”

  “I still have my key.”

  She held out her hand. “Give it to me.” When he didn’t, she said, “Give it to me right now, or I’m calling a locksmith to have the locks changed.”

  “Look, I know you’re pissed at me—”

  “Get out.” She stormed down the hall toward her office. “But before you go, I have something for you.” She grabbed the manila envelope his lawyer had sent to her. Pulling the documents out of the envelope, she tore them in two before tearing them again. “That’s what I think of your idea to take my child away from me. It’s not going to happen!”

  “Sabrina—”

  “We can fight this out in court if you want to, but you’re not taking this baby from me. I don’t care what you say.”

  “Then you do want the baby?”

  “Yes, but not the baby’s father.” She’d been devastated for days after he left, praying he would call to try to work things out. When he didn’t, she decided she didn’t need him and neither did her baby. She knew it would be impossible to keep him out of her child’s life, but that didn’t mean she intended to let him bully her.

  “Really? Is that how it is now?”

  “I gave you my heart.” Don’t you dare let him see you cry again. Stay strong, girl. “I was willing to compromise, to figure out how to give you the kind of life you wanted, but you weren’t even willing to meet me halfway.”

  “I know that’s how it seemed, but—”

  “I told you I was scared and uncertain about having a baby, and you lashed out at me because I didn’t feel the way you thought I should.”

  “I know.”

  He wasn’t arguing, but that didn’t calm her. She’d been waiting for almost two weeks to tell him what she thought of him, and he wasn’t leaving until she’d said her piece. She walked past him, storming into the kitchen. She poured a glass of milk for herself and slid a bottled water across the counter for him. “I have a mind of my own and a right to feel any way I choose.”

  “I know you do.”

  “I was scared, and I had a right to be. I’ve had time to process it and talk to my therapist about it, and I’m still scared, but every day I’m a little less scared.” Her hand drifted to her flat stomach. “And I’m falling a little more in love with this baby every day.”

  He smiled. “Me too.”

  She took a deep breath to calm down. “I’m still mad at you, but we can’t be enemies. That’s not good for the baby. We’ll work something out, a custody arrangement that gives us equal visitation maybe.” When he didn’t respond, she said, “I know it’s not ideal, but couples do it all the time. I’ve joined some online message boards, you know, for single and working moms. It definitely won’t be easy, but it is doable.” She squared her shoulders. “I think I can do this.” When she didn’t sound as confident as she should, she amended her statement. “I am going to do this.”

  “Alone?”

  She shrugged. “For now.”

  “What does that mean?”

  She sat on a stool at the breakfast bar. “Who knows what the future holds? I might find a good man and get married someday. If this experience has taught me one thing, it’s never say never.”

  “Don’t do that,” he said, his expression pained. “Don’t talk about marrying someone else.”

  Thinking about being with someone else was difficult, but that didn’t mean it could never happen. She was determined to remain open to the possibility. “You could just as easily find someone else. Our baby may have a stepmother and stepfather down the road. We have to consider that possibility.”

  He leaned over the counter, closing in on her. “Don’t talk about letting another man raise our baby. That’s never gonna happen.”

  “I can’t do this.” She gestured toward her front door, though it couldn’t be seen from their position in the kitchen. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve got a lot going on. The last thing I need is to get into a fight with you about something that may or may not happen in the future.”

  “You’re right.” He stepped back. “All this stress can’t be good for the baby. Maybe you should think about getting away for a few days until this all blows over.”

  “It’s going to take a lot longer than that for it to blow over.” She sighed. “There’ll be a trial. I’ll have to testify.”

  “You did the right thing. I’m proud of you.”

  She knew that shouldn’t please her. She shouldn’t care what he thought, but old habits apparently died hard. “I know I did the right thing. I couldn’t let him get away with it, and I couldn’t feel safe until I knew he was locked up.”

  Dylan swore softly. “Have you been able to sleep? Any more nightmares?”

  She shrugged. “Some, but I’ve managed.” Her therapist had told her to take it one night at a time, and she’d found a relaxing bedtime ritual that helped. “Don’t worry, I’m not drinking, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

  “God, I shouldn’t have said that,” he said, paling. “I know you’d never drink while you’re pregnant. Has it been hard, giving up the booze cold turkey?”

  “No, I’m not an alcoholic.” She took a sip of her milk. “Besides, we do what we have to do, right? Giving up alcohol is a small price to pay.”

  He sat across from her on a stool. “Jaxon came to my office today. He let me have it for being a selfish jerk.”

  “It took Jaxon to make you realize that?” She bit her lip when she realized she was only making matters worse. She didn’t want to argue with him. For the sake of their baby, she wanted to find a way to get along.

  “I guess it did. He made me see things from another perspective.” He turned the water bottle in his hand and stared at the granite countertop. “I haven’t handled this well. I’ve made a lot of mistakes where you’re concerned.”

  “We all make mistakes.”

  “I’m sorry.” He looked into her eyes. “I’m sorry I was being unreasonable, that I said things I shouldn’t have. I hate that I hurt you.”

  She knew he was sincere. She wanted to put the ugliness behind them, so she said, “I forgive you. I’m sorry too.”