“Um, no, it’s his sister,” Dylan said, trying to ignore Brittany’s characterization of Sabrina. “Why don’t you order dessert? I’ll be right back.”

  “Sure,” she said, reaching for the dessert menu. “That chocolate lava cake sounds amazing.”

  “It is.” He winked at her. “Make sure you ask for two forks. I intend to share.” Flirting used to come as naturally to him as breathing, but ever since Sabrina, it felt fake and forced.

  “You got it, sexy,” she said, reaching for his hand.

  He brought her hand to his lips before releasing her. He was pretty sure Sabrina had witnessed the whole exchange, but he couldn’t care less if she was mad. She was the one who’d cheated on and dumped him. Did she expect him to remain single and celibate and pining away for her for the rest of his life? Okay, that was sort of what he’d been doing for the past month, but she didn’t have to know that.

  Sabrina’s eyes widened when Dylan approached their table and slapped Dalton on the back. “Hey, buddy, how’s life treatin’ ya?”

  Dalton grinned before offering Dylan his hand. Obviously Sabrina hadn’t filled her brother in on their relationship. If she had, Dalton wouldn’t be so friendly.

  “I can’t complain. You?” Dalton said.

  Dylan had one reason to complain, and she was sitting across from him looking even more beautiful than he remembered. Only when his eyes scanned her more carefully did he notice she’d lost a little weight and there were faint smudges under her beautiful hazel eyes. Maybe he wasn’t the only one losing sleep since they’d split. Good. He hoped she was as miserable as she’d made him.

  “Things are good,” he lied.

  “I can see that.” Dalton laughed. “Who’s the little hottie you’re sittin’ with, and why didn’t you introduce us?”

  “’Cause I trust you about as far as I can throw you, man.”

  “New girlfriend?” Sabrina asked, peeling the label off her beer bottle.

  “First date,” Dylan said, locking eyes with her. “Who knows where it’ll end up?”

  “I have a pretty good idea where it’ll end up,” Dalton said, backhanding Dylan’s stomach. “In your bed.”

  “Excuse me,” Sabrina said, avoiding Dylan’s gaze as she stood. “I have to use the ladies’ room.”

  Dylan couldn’t resist watching her walk away.

  Dalton said, “I don’t know what the hell’s wrong with her. She seems so withdrawn. My mother called me earlier and asked if I’d seen her. Apparently it’s been a month since she stopped by their place, which is weird. You know how close she and my folks are.”

  “Yeah.” Dylan hated concealing the truth from his friend, but if Sabrina didn’t want to share the intimate details of her life with her family, it wasn’t his place to fill them in.

  “Has she been in here much?” Dalton asked.

  “Uh no, I don’t think so.” Dylan knew she hadn’t been in because, though he was too embarrassed to admit it, he’d been hanging out there more than usual, hoping she’d show up. “At least, I haven’t seen her.”

  “I ran into a few of her girlfriends downtown last night. They said she’s been avoiding them too. Don’t you think that’s strange? You know my sister, she loves to socialize.” He grinned. “A homebody she’s not.”

  “No, I guess she isn’t.” But when they had been together, Sabrina seemed content to order in and curl up on the couch with a movie and a glass of wine. God, he missed nights like that.

  “You think some guy did a number on her?”

  His mind flashed to the baseball player she’d all but admitted she’d slept with. Maybe she had feelings for him and he didn’t reciprocate… or maybe she was missing him as much as he was missing her? “I can’t say.” I’d like to, but I can’t.

  “Could you talk to her for me?” Dalton said, looking hopeful. “Y’all are good friends. Maybe she’d open up to you about what’s bothering her?”

  Oh, hell no. “Uh, I don’t think I should pry.”

  “You wouldn’t be prying.” Dalton slid out of the booth when he spotted his sister coming out of the restroom. “You’d be helping out a friend.” He gripped Dylan’s shoulder. “I’ll go keep your date company while you talk to Sabina. Thanks, man. Seriously, it means a lot to me.”

  Dylan watched his friend walk away and cursed under his breath as he realized he didn’t have a choice. He had to talk to Sabrina, to tell her that she was worrying her family and friends. Whatever was bothering her, she’d better get her act together before they staged an intervention.

  “What’s going on?” Sabrina asked as she approached the table. She glanced at her brother, who was busy entertaining Brittany. “What’s he doing with her?”

  “He wanted me to talk to you. He’s worried about you.” He gestured to the bench seat. “Sit down. We need to make it look like we’re having a heart-to-heart, or he’ll be suspicious.”

  She cast a longing look at the door. “Maybe I should just leave. I’m kind of tired, and I have an early morning meeting.”

  “You must know Dalton’s not going to let this go.” Dylan slid into the booth, waiting for her to follow suit. “So we either do this, or he’ll keep hounding you about what’s bothering you.”

  She expelled a deep breath before sinking in across from him.

  “How’ve you been? Really?’

  She shrugged. “Okay, I guess.” When he shot her a skeptical look, she said, “I’m surviving.”

  “Me too. Barely.”

  She raised an eyebrow before looking at his date. “Looks to me like you’ve already moved on.”

  “I’m trying to. It’s not easy.” He shouldn’t feel guilty for being out with another woman, but he did. He couldn’t shake the feeling he belonged with Sabrina.

  Sabrina’s eyes were downcast as she whispered, “I miss our friendship, D.”

  “I miss that too.” But he missed so much more than that.

  He missed the look in her eyes when he was making love to her. He missed the feel of her warm back pressed against his chest while he slept. He missed the scent of her perfume on his pillow. He missed the sound of her laughter when she watched her favorite sit-com. He missed breakfast in bed and long drives in the country. And… he missed every damn thing about her.

  “This is killing me,” he said. “I had no idea it would be this hard.” Seeing her again, the pain he’d felt when he learned of her infidelity came flooding back.

  “I’m so sorry.” She reached for his hand. “I never meant to hurt you. You’re a great guy.”

  “Just not the guy for you, huh?” He didn’t know why he was torturing himself this way. She’d already made it clear he wasn’t man enough to keep her happy, in or out of bed. If he had been, she wouldn’t have turned to someone else. “It’s okay.” He withdrew his hand. “You don’t have to say anything.”

  “There’s so much I need to say,” she argued. “Things I should have said before I let you leave that night. But I was too much of a wreck to even think straight.”

  “Fine,” he said, crossing his arms. “Say what you need to say.” He should just walk away, but if he did, he’d always wonder if she might have said something that would have changed everything. He couldn’t live with any more ‘what ifs’.

  “When I first met you…” She played with her sapphire-and-diamond ring. “I was so nervous. I’d had a crush on you forever.” She smiled faintly, as though recalling that night. “I was so sure I wouldn’t be able to string two words together.”

  “You had a thing for me?” She’d never told him that. All these years, and he’d had no idea? “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  Sabrina blushed. “I don’t know. It’s not the kind of thing a girl likes to admit, I guess.”

  “Since when are you shy?”

  “I’m not, but I have my pride.” She rested her chin in her cupped hand and looked into his eyes. “You were the sexiest man I’d ever laid eyes on. I wanted you so bad, and the fact I couldn’t have you only made me want you more.”

  “Why are telling me this now?” He didn’t know if he should be flattered, annoyed, or frustrated.

  “I just want you to know it wasn’t one-sided. It may have seemed like you were the one doing the chasing, but I was as crazy about you as you were about me. I need you to know that.”

  “Why?”

  She looked ravaged. “Because I know I hurt you, and I hate that. I can’t take back what happened, but maybe telling you the truth about this will give you some peace of mind.”

  “If you were so crazy about me, how could you do what you did? Were you drinking?” He knew it didn’t matter anymore. It was too late to pretend it hadn’t happened, but he had to know.

  “No.” She shook her head emphatically. “I was stone cold sober when I was… with him.”

  It obviously killed her to talk about it, but not as much as it hurt him to hear about it. “Are you still seeing him?”

  She paled before her eyes darted to his. “No, absolutely not.”

  “What about your policy about sleeping with clients?” he asked, feeling a resurgence of the anger that always seemed close to the surface these days. “You broke your rules for him, but wouldn’t for me. Why?”

  Tears sprung to her eyes. “I can’t do this. I’m sorry.” She slid off the bench before throwing a few bills on the table. “Please tell my brother I grabbed a cab and headed home. I’ll talk to him tomorrow.”

  Dylan knew he should say something, try to convince her to stay, but he couldn’t find the words. Watching her leave, the wound that had started to heal tore open and bled all over again.

  Chapter Five

  Dylan was visiting his parents for the first time since his last visit with Sabrina. He knew it would be hard because he’d have to confront his mother about what she’d said to Sabrina. He hated to argue with her, but it had been eating away at him, and if he didn’t say something, it may do irreparable damage to their relationship.

  When Dylan got there, his father was in the family room watching a football game with Dylan’s younger sister, Ellie, so it seemed like the perfect time to lay his cards on the table. He hovered in the kitchen doorway for a few minutes before his mother looked up, smiling when she saw him.

  “I’m so glad you could come, honey. We’ve missed you.”

  “I needed some time.” He pushed off the wall and claimed a seat at the table in the middle of the spacious room. “I knew if I’d come sooner, I would have let you have it for meddling in my life.”

  “Oh, I see.” She didn’t even pretend she didn’t know what he was talking about. “So Sabrina told you about our chat? I’m not surprised.”

  “Would it surprise you to know she dumped me because of what you said to her?” It wasn’t fair to lay all the blame on his mother, but she deserved to feel guilty for her hand in their breakup. Maybe they could have gotten past the infidelity if Sabrina had been willing to work on their relationship.

  “She did?” His mother pursed her lips before she said, “Hmm, maybe she’s not as selfish as I thought.”

  “How could you do this?” Dylan asked, slamming his fist on the table. “It was none of your goddamn business!” He couldn’t remember the last time he’d yelled at his mother. Probably when he was an insolent teenager and couldn’t hold his temper.

  She looked toward the ceiling before facing him. “I’ve been watching you make a fool of yourself over that girl for years. I was sick of it. I had to do something!”

  “Making a fool of myself?” Dylan couldn’t deny that hurt his pride, in addition to pissing him off. Was that how everyone else saw it too? “Sabrina and I were friends long before we started dating. I was dating other people. It wasn’t like I was stalking the girl!”

  His mother sat next to him, obviously weighing her words carefully. “I never meant to imply you were stalking her. I know you’d never do something like that. But it was obvious you weren’t satisfied with just being friends. You’ve always wanted more than she’s been willing or able to give, and I think it’s time for you to face facts. If you had stayed with her, you would never get married or have the family I know you want.”

  Dylan knew his mother was only looking out for him, but he was incensed that she assumed she had the right to dictate who he should and shouldn’t date. “It’s up to me to decide when and if I get married. That’s not your call.”

  She folded her hands on the table and looked him in the eye. “Just answer one question. Is she the girl you want to marry?” When Dylan refused to respond, she sighed. “Just admit it—you’d put a ring on her finger tomorrow if she’d accept it. But she won’t. And therein lies the problem.”

  Dylan leaned forward, lowering his voice. “Do you think I need you to remind me that the woman I love doesn’t love me back? I wake up every goddamn morning with this ache.” He clutched his chest. “That’s the only reminder I need. It never goes away. Not when I’m with someone else, trying to distract myself with work, or with my friends. It never goes away. I’m beginning to think it never will.” It scared him to acknowledge that he may have to deal with that feeling forever. It seemed he had no escape from the way he felt.

  She covered his forearm with her hand. “Oh honey, I know it hurts now, but it will get better. It’ll get easier. You’ll see. Just give it time.”

  “I’ve given it eight years. Eight long years of waiting to feel for someone else the way I do about Sabrina, and guess what? No one has even come close. Being with her made me happier than I’ve ever been in my life. Why couldn’t you see that?” He withdrew his arm, ignoring the flash of hurt that crossed his mother’s face. “Why couldn’t you just trust that I knew what I was doing?”

  “I’m sorry,” she said, crossing her arms. “I was only trying to help. I was afraid if you stayed with her, you’d wind up settling for so much less than you deserve and want. I didn’t want to see that happen to you because of some woman who—”

  “She’s not just some woman,” Dylan said, feeling defensive on Sabrina’s behalf. “She’s the only woman I’ve ever loved. If I can’t have kids with her, I’m not sure I want them at all. If I can’t come home to her, I think maybe I’d rather come home to an empty house.”

  “You don’t mean that.” She looked alarmed. “You’re still reeling from the breakup. Just give it some time. You’ll feel differently after a few months.”

  “You used to tell me when I met the right girl, I’d know. You said when you met Dad, there wasn’t a doubt in your mind he was the one. You broke up with your boyfriend on the spot so you could be with him. That’s how sure you were.”

  “So?”

  “That’s how I felt the first time I saw Sabrina.” He’d never admitted that to anyone, but his mother needed to understand the depth of his feelings for her. “You know what I told Brett the first time I laid eyes on her?” He didn’t wait for a response before he said, “I told him I was gonna marry that girl someday.”

  “But she doesn’t want that,” she said, sounding frustrated. “How many times does she have to tell you that?”

  “Maybe I’d have been willing to settle for what we had.” Had he not learned about what had happened with Bell, he probably would have continued their relationship without complaint for years before he’d pressured her about a commitment. “What I had with her was better than anything I’ve had with any other woman in my life. She wasn’t just my girlfriend. She was my best friend. She understands me better than anyone ever has, and now that she’s gone, there’s this hole.” He rubbed over his heart, trying to ease the ache. “No matter what I do, it just won’t go away.”

  “Oh, sweetheart, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”

  Dylan didn’t need her to apologize. He needed her to understand. “You may see it as settling, but I see it as compromising, Mama,” he said, his voice softer and gentler. “You’ve always told me good relationships are built on compromise, right?”

  “Yes, I did.” She looked close to tears as she pursed her lips. “We raised a smart, mature, competent son. I don’t know how I could have forgotten that. I truly am sorry.”

  He knew she was sincere, which helped him release some of his anger and frustration over her interference. “It wasn’t entirely your fault. There were other issues that led to our breakup.” He would never tell his mother that Sabrina had cheated on him. If he did, her claws would come out for sure.

  “Maybe if I talk to her—”

  “No, don’t do that,” Dylan said, patting her hand. “It may be too late for us to work things out—I don’t know. I just need you to understand that you can’t weigh in on the girls I date. I’m not eighteen anymore. I’m a grown-ass man, and I’m gonna date anyone I choose, regardless of how you feel about it.” He kissed her cheek to soften his words. “Not because I don’t love you and respect your opinion. You know I do. But you raised me to have a mind of my own and good judgment. Now you just have to trust me.”

  She patted his cheek with a sigh. “And that, my dear, is the hardest part of being a parent. But I promise, I won’t interfere anymore. From now on, you’re on your own.”

  Dylan kissed his mother’s hand. “Good. Now to make it up to me, why don’t you bring a plate of those peanut butter swirls over here? You know they’re my favorite.”

  “But we haven’t even had dinner yet,” she said, trying to look stern but failing. A smile broke through.

  “I won’t tell if you won’t,” he said, winking.

  ***

  Dylan walked into High Rollers a week later to find Sabrina partying it up with her girlfriends in the cigar bar. She was the only woman he’d ever known who appreciated a good stogie and a glass of scotch almost as much as he did. Damn. He still felt as if the big man upstairs had made her just for him. Too bad she didn’t feel the same way.

  Jaxon walked up behind him and threw his arm around Dylan’s shoulders. “She’s been here for the last four or five nights partying like that. You know what that’s about?”