“Why have you been drinking?” he asked somberly.

  Uh oh. She’d been afraid he’d ask that. “It helps me sleep.”

  “Why are you having trouble sleeping?” When she gave him the duh look, he asked, “Are you having nightmares? Are you afraid? What is it?”

  She’d never lied to Dylan. Sure, she’d let him believe what had happened between her and Bell was consensual, but she’d never outright lied. She couldn’t. He knew her well enough to see right through her. “Yes and yes.” She raised her chin as she forced herself to look him in the eye.

  “Hmm, then consider me your elixir.”

  She frowned. “What are you talking about?”

  “I’m staying here until you’re not afraid anymore.”

  “What? You can’t do that. You have your own life.” A life that included women and dating and sex, not that she’d let him know how much that hurt her. “You can’t stay here and babysit me.”

  “Think of it this way—if I’m here, I can’t be on a Florida-bound jet to pulverize a man.”

  She smiled. Only Dylan could make her smile through her tears. “You’re the best friend I’ve ever had. Well, you and Kiara.”

  “And that’s why we’re both going to help you through this.” He flexed his huge biceps, grinning. “But since Kiara doesn’t have guns like this, I’m clearly the better choice as a bodyguard.”

  I love you. That was what she wanted to say, instead she whispered, “Thank you,” as she reached for his hand.

  He kissed the back of her hand, closing his eyes. “Thank you.”

  “For what?”

  “For not hating me.”

  “I could never hate you, D.”

  He stood, squeezing her hand before releasing it. “I’m going to make my way to the guest room. You sure you don’t want something before bed?”

  “What I want is…” Her eyes scanned his chest. He was wearing a tight pale blue T-shirt and low-rise faded jeans. She hadn’t been aroused since the attack, but the thought of feeling his strong arms wrapped around her filled her with hope, that maybe she would be okay again. Someday.

  “Tell me,” he said softly. “What do you want? Anything. Just name it, and it’s yours.”

  “Could you maybe sleep in here with me tonight?” Her cheeks flamed when he appeared shocked. “I’m not proposing…” She shrugged. “It just might be nice… I mean, it might help me to… you know… sleep.” She wasn’t one to babble, yet there she was, running off at the mouth.

  “Sure, whatever makes you happy.” He gave her a lopsided grin. “I left an overnight bag in the foyer. Just let me go grab it.”

  He came back a few minutes later wearing the same blue T-shirt and a pair of running shorts.

  She knew he preferred to sleep in boxer briefs, but she couldn’t go there. Not yet. “Um, you can take your shirt off, if you’d be more comfortable.”

  He frowned. “Are you sure? I don’t mind keeping it on.”

  Simply because he was considerate enough to offer, she heard herself say, “I don’t mind at all.”

  She watched him peel off the shirt and thought about how powerful he looked. He had a few inches and at least forty pounds on Bell, who’d easily out-muscled her, yet how could she feel so safe with Dylan?

  “If this is too much for you,” he said, looking uncertain, “I really don’t mind sleeping in the guest room.”

  “You took my elixir away, remember?” she said, trying to make light of it. She pulled the blanket back on the other side of the bed and patted it gently. “The least you can do is see me through the night.”

  He grimaced at her torn shirt before he reached for his own discarded T-shirt at the foot of the bed. “Here, put this on.”

  She had planned to change when she got up for her drink, but she had barely been able to summon the energy to crawl back to bed. “Thanks.” She tossed the torn garment aside before pulling his shirt over her head. “Could you get the light?”

  “Sure.” He flipped the switch before crawling into bed beside her, keeping a respectable distance in the king-sized bed.

  In the dark, she found the courage to whisper, “Come closer, D. I need to feel your arms around me.” Within seconds of feeling his muscled heat envelope her, sleep claimed her.

  ***

  Dylan woke with a start as Sabrina thrashed and sobbed next to him, flailing and begging it to stop.

  “Baby, it’s okay,” he whispered, careful not to restrain her. “It’s me. It’s Dylan. No one’s going to hurt you, sweetheart. I’m right here.”

  The urge to destroy that guy came back with a vengeance, especially when he turned on the bedside lamp and saw the tears staining her pillow.

  Touching her shoulder gently, he said, “Wake up, baby. It was just a bad dream.” Except it wasn’t. It had really happened, and nothing he could say or do could take it back. He had been her lover, her boyfriend. He should have protected her, yet he hadn’t, and he’d never felt more inept.

  “Oh God.” She woke with a start, her eyes wide and frantic. “Oh, D, it’s you. I had the worst dream. I thought… I dreamed…” Her eyes drifted to his shorts, and she covered her mouth with one hand, her silent sobs tearing out his heart. “It wasn’t a nightmare, was it? It really happened, didn’t it?”

  “Yeah, I’m afraid it did, baby.” He opened his arms, giving her the choice to settle into them or not. Thankfully, she did. He stroked her, whispering, “It’s gonna be okay, sweetheart.” Of course he had no way of knowing that, but he desperately wanted it to be true.

  “I almost believe you.” Her sobs finally subsided. “Normally I’d wake up like this and pour a drink to calm my nerves. This is so much better.”

  “Good.” He kissed the top of her head. He never thought the day would come when he’d share a bed with the sexiest woman on the planet and not want to make love to her, but the only thoughts racing through his head were what he could say or do to give her a moment’s peace.

  She sighed. “I have a long day tomorrow.” Turning away from him, she fluffed her down pillow before sinking into it. “You can get the light now. I’m okay.”

  He did as she asked, but he didn’t wait for an invitation to hold her. He couldn’t keep his distance, knowing she was trying so hard to be brave. “How the hell have you been able to go into work every day and pretend everything is fine?” He thought he’d admired her strength and courage before, but she’d proved that she was more resilient than he ever gave her credit for.

  “I didn’t have a choice.” She gripped his forearm. “It’s worse when I don’t have anything to distract me. Work is good for me. It gives me something to think about, something to focus on.”

  He didn’t want to push the issue of pressing charges, but he felt compelled to ask, “Have you thought of talking to someone about this, a counselor, maybe?”

  “Kiara asked me the same thing. I think that might be a good idea.”

  “Jaxon was seeing someone,” he said, knowing his friend wouldn’t mind him sharing that bit of news with her. Jaxon considered Sabrina one of his closest friends. “Would you like me to get his therapist’s name for you?”

  “Um maybe, let me think about it a bit more.”

  He knew he couldn’t force her to do it before she was ready, but he hated the thought of her keeping her pain all bottled up inside. “Sweetheart, if you want to talk about what happened that night, I’m willing to listen.” Hearing the graphic details would ruin him, but offering was the least he could do.

  She rolled onto her back, sliding their joined hands down to her stomach. “I never had reason to believe he was like that. Sure, he flirted with me, but—”

  “He flirted with you?” Dylan tried to mask his annoyance. “Why didn’t you tell me that? I would’ve taken the trip with you if I’d known he was into you. That would have at least sent him the message that you weren’t available.” And this never would have happened. He didn’t have to say it to know she was already thinking about how things could have turned out so differently.

  She released a slow, almost soundless breath. “In my line of work, you get used to guys hitting on you. It’s no big deal.”

  “It’s a big deal to me,” he said, feeling frustration overtake him. “Why didn’t you ever tell me that your clients hit on you?” He shouldn’t be surprised. She was a stunning woman who exuded sex, strength, and sass. Any man with a pulse would want her.

  She moved her hand up to stroke his bicep. “I didn’t want to upset you. I know how jealous you are, and it meant nothing. I just laughed it off. When they stepped out of line, I told them our agency has a policy about agents dating their clients, and that was enough to deter them.”

  “Why the hell didn’t you tell them you had a boyfriend?”

  “Some guys see that as a challenge.”

  He knew she was right. A lot of teammates had felt that way back in the day. “Just tell me what happened with Bell.” When he heard how terse he sounded, he said, “I’m sorry. If you want to talk about it, feel free. If not, I’m okay with that too.”

  She was silent for so long, he thought maybe she’d fallen asleep.

  She finally said, “I invited him to my hotel room. God, why did I do that?” She didn’t wait for Dylan to respond before she added, “I thought we’d have more privacy to talk strategy there. It never occurred to me that he’d come on to me again and refuse to take no for an answer.”

  Dylan forced himself to relax when he realized she could probably feel the tension in his body. “Go on.”

  “I told him no.” Her voice broke. “I tried to fight him off. I tried to scream but—”

  Dylan hauled her against his chest, massaging her scalp as he let her cry. He felt as if days passed as he lay in the dark, absorbing her tears, holding her tight, and promising her it would be okay. She tipped her head up to look at him, and through the sliver of light coming through the drapes, he could see that she looked ravaged.

  “Thank you for being here,” she said softly. “I needed you. I didn’t realize how much.”

  He kissed her forehead. He wanted to taste her lips, but any move he made could be misconstrued as sexual. “I’ll be here as long as you need me, baby.” Which he hoped would be forever.

  She surprised him by pressing her lips to his in a brief but tender kiss. “You’re an amazing man, D. I’m so lucky to have you in my life.”

  “Not as lucky as I am to have you.” Closing his arms around her, he inhaled the smell of her hair when her face found the crook of his neck. His emotions had run the gamut from fear to outrage to shame, but with her in his arms, he felt a sense of peace he hadn’t felt since he’d left her. No matter what happened from then on out, he had to believe they’d find a way to get through it together.

  Chapter Eight

  “Are you still speaking to me?” Kiara asked, standing in the doorway of Sabrina’s office. “Or do you hate me for sending Dylan over to your place last night?”

  “I could never hate you, you know that.” Sabrina had been angry at first, but she couldn’t deny that was the best night’s sleep she’d had in months. Waking up to breakfast in bed had made it the most pleasant morning she’d had… since the last time he made her breakfast in bed.

  Of course, that breakfast had been followed by some of the most amazing sex of her life. This time was different. Dylan had barely been able to look her in the eye this morning, not that she could blame him. She was a different person now, irrevocably changed by one night.

  Kiara came into her boss’s office and closed the door. “So don’t keep me in suspense. How did it go? Did you guys talk? Did he stay?”

  “Yeah, we talked.” Sabrina slid her chair away from her computer, giving her friend her undivided attention. “And yes, he stayed the night. It seems he intends to spend the night for the foreseeable future.”

  Kiara raised an arched brow. “And how do you feel about that?”

  “I…” Would she sound too needy if she admitted she was relieved to know he’d be there when she got home? “I’m okay with it. Dylan’s a good friend. He wants to be there for me, to help me through this, and I’m grateful to have him.”

  Kiara rolled her eyes. “This is me you’re talking to, remember? You told me not so long ago that Dylan was the only man you’d ever loved, so don’t play the ‘friend’ card and expect me to pretend you aren’t bluffing.”

  That was the only problem with having a best friend who knew your deepest, darkest secrets and wasn’t afraid to call you out. “Since you have such a good memory, you should also recall the reasons I told you it would never work between us. Sure, what happened with Bell may have caused our breakup, but we would have eventually broken up anyways.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “He was willing to have a baby with Carly,” Sabrina said, rolling a pencil between her fingers as she considered snapping it in two. She was relieved he’d given up on that ridiculous notion. She loved him too much to see him settle for a woman who was clearly in love with someone else. “That should tell you how serious he is about having a family.”

  “I know you said you don’t want the whole white picket fence deal, but—”

  “Don’t,” Sabrina said, raising her hand. “I’m not in the mood to go there today. Did you want something else? Something business related, maybe?”

  Kiara pulled a business card from the pocket of her fitted black blazer. “I took the liberty of making an appointment for you at four o’clock today. I had Louise check your schedule and you’re free, so don’t even think about making excuses.”

  Sabrina’s stomach clenched when she read the card: Ellen Hunt, Family Therapist. “What the hell is this? If I see a therapist, shouldn’t it be someone who deals with…” She cleared her throat. “My specific issue?”

  “My father recommended her,” Kiara said.

  Since Kiara’s father was a well-respected psychiatrist, Sabrina had to trust he knew what he was talking about. “You didn’t tell him what happened to me, did you?” She couldn’t stand the thought of anyone else knowing. She was afraid that people would see her differently and treat her as a victim instead of the strong, capable woman she’d always been.

  “Of course not,” Kiara said, sounding indignant. “I simply told him I was asking for a friend who’d been the victim of a sexual assault. I also told him that my friend could use some help sorting out her commitment issues.”

  Sabrina cringed. She hated thinking of herself as a victim. “I do not have commitment issues.”

  “Like hell you don’t. Come on, Dylan is the only guy you’ve ever really given your heart to, and as much as you love him, you’re not willing to consider a future with him. What does that tell you?”

  “That I know who I am and what I want. Marriage and kids aren’t for everyone, Kiara. Just because you’re convinced your Prince Charming is out there somewhere waiting for you doesn’t mean we all feel the need to be rescued. Some of us can take care of ourselves.” She winced when she realized how harsh she sounded. “I’m sorry, I know you can take care of yourself, but you have to admit you’re a hopeless romantic. You’ve dated a lot of losers, given your heart to the wrong men over and over again—”

  “Okay,” Kiara said, looking more amused than annoyed, “ask Dr. Hunt if she can give us the two-for-one special. Maybe you’re not the only one who needs help.”

  Sabrina grinned, relieved that her friend hadn’t taken her remarks too seriously. “I’ll let you know what she says.”

  “Come on,” Kiara said, reaching into the bottom drawer of Sabrina’s desk to grab her friend’s purse. “We have a date at the gym, then lunch before your appointment.”

  “What are you talking about?” Sabrina gestured toward her computer screen. “I can’t leave. I have work to do.”

  “You’ve been working too many hours, especially lately. It won’t kill you to take half a day off.”

  “If we’re going to play hooky, we could at least go to the spa. Why the gym?” she grumbled, letting Kiara haul her to her feet.

  Kiara gripped her shoulders, looking her in the eye. “Because you seem to have forgotten how fierce you feel when you’re in that weight room. You are tough, Sabrina. Just because that bastard overpowered you doesn’t make you weak or defenseless, and that’s the way you’ve been acting lately.”

  Sabrina sucked in a breath, stunned by the vehemence in her friend’s words. Ouch. If only she could pretend they weren’t true.

  “So we’re going to build you back up. Dr. Hunt will take care of the emotional, I’ll take care of the physical, and Dylan will take care of the”—Kiara winked—“rest.”

  “I can’t even think about going there yet.” She was still attracted to Dylan, probably always would be, but the prospect of sex, even with him, was terrifying.

  “I know that.” Kiara slung an arm over Sabrina’s shoulder as she led her to the elevator. “I’m not suggesting you hop into bed with Dylan tonight. I’m just saying he’ll be there when you’re ready to take the next step.”

  “You don’t know that.” Sabrina felt the ever-present knot of apprehension tightening in her stomach. “Dylan is a sexy, charismatic, successful guy. I can’t expect him to waste his time waiting for me to feel… normal again.”

  “Has he… uh… been with anyone since y’all broke up?” Kiara asked, punching the button on the elevator instead of meeting Sabrina’s gaze.

  “How should I know? It’s not the kind of information he’d volunteer, and I’m in no position to ask.” Though she would like to know if there was someone special he called when he felt amorous. She was well acquainted with his sex drive—no way was he going without.

  “I doubt he’d hook up with someone else while he’s staying with you,” Kiara said, clenching her phone. “He’s not like that.”

  “It’s not like we’re in a relationship anymore. We’re just—”

  “Friends, I know.” Kiara rolled her eyes. “I saw the way he reacted when he found out what had happened to you. You don’t react that strongly about a friend.”