“Don’t judge me.”

  “Oh, I’m not. Just one note: the apartment isn’t as soundproof as the practice room, so don’t be too loud unless you’re looking forward to snarky comments from Nora and Raul in the morning.” He lifted the comforter and climbed under it.

  I turned over and lay on my back. The blanket rose like a tent as Sebastian made his way to my dick. Without waiting for anything, he pulled my sleeping shorts down and wrapped his lips around my glans. The warmth of his mouth was instant and welcome. The sound of him sucking me was music to my ears.

  His head bobbed up and down, taking only short breaks to lick my balls before going straight back to work. After five minutes, I was already getting close. In our online conversations, we hadn’t held anything back, which meant I had been jerking off at least once a day. So after two days of abstinence, my balls felt like they were going to explode if he didn’t empty them. As much as I wanted to cum while being sucked, though, this wasn’t how I wanted the night to end. After all, I wasn’t the only one in this room with blue balls.

  I lifted the comforter, catching a glimpse of Sebastian licking up my shaft.

  “Welcome,” he chuckled. He was hunched over, his ass raised up high so he wouldn’t fall off the bed—which gave me an idea.

  “Stay like this,” I said, pulling my legs up.

  He grumbled but did as I asked while I climbed out of bed, moved to his feet, and lifted the blanket. Instantly, I was rewarded with the best view of his ass. I pulled down his slip, spread his cheeks, and buried my mouth between them, licking up his crack.

  “Oh, so that’s where this is going.” He moaned, just loud enough for me to hear how much he was enjoying this change of pace. “This feels so good. But now that you’re down there, I have to tell you—just licking won’t be enough.”

  “What would be enough?”

  “Your dick inside me, taking full advantage.” He looked back at me between his legs. “There’s lube on my desk.”

  I followed his instructions and found a suspicious-looking brown paper bag with the promised bottle inside.

  Seconds later, I poured some lube onto my rock-hard cock and onto him. I worked it in carefully, making sure he was ready. Just as I was about to slide a finger inside to stretch him out, he grunted.

  “No fingers,” he whispered. “Give me the real thing. I can take it.”

  Encouraged by his plea, I lined myself up and slowly pushed in, watching the head of my dick disappear.

  “Fuck yeah,” he gasped. “All the way.”

  His voice put me in a trance, and I obeyed, pushing in until I was fully inside him. I shoved the rest of the blanket off his upper body. After giving him five seconds to breathe, I started moving, slowly thrusting in and out until the only thing on my mind was the sensation of his hole engulfing my cock. We sank into it—the sound of our bodies meeting, our stifled cries, our breaths falling into the same rhythm.

  “Fill me up,” Sebastian whispered. “I want your load. Please. I’ve waited so long.”

  Out of reflex, I slapped his ass, pulling a moan from him.

  “Yes. Like that.” He jerked himself off. “Give it to me.”

  This was exactly what we needed—the reward for all our waiting and hard work.

  “I’m getting close,” I whispered.

  “Me too.”

  After three more thrusts, I was there. I drove into him one more time and erupted as if it was my first orgasm in years. His hand sped up, and seconds later, his body twitched as he came onto the bed.

  I collapsed against his back, my body still shuddering. He gave way under my weight and sank down onto the mattress.

  We both panted for a while before Sebastian’s chuckles broke the silence. “This… wow. Who would’ve thought one of my fantasies would actually come true?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “My whole load ended up on the bed,” he said with a laugh. “It was one of the things I told you on the phone.”

  “Oh, I remember. The night our crowdfunding ended. That was so hot.”

  “Hotter than this?”

  “Different kind of hot.” I climbed off him and pulled out.

  Sebastian lay there for a moment before pushing himself up, revealing the mess on the sheets. “Fuck,” he chuckled. “We probably should change those.”

  “I can do that,” I said, taking it in. “Did you always… come that much?”

  “I kind of saved it up,” he said. “It’s been four days.”

  “I promise, we won’t wait that long to do it again.”

  TWENTY-FOUR

  THE SONG OF DOING IT TOGETHER

  SEBASTIAN

  The night before our concert, I dreamed that Alex and I were performing on a massive stage in front of thousands of people—but when I opened my mouth to sing, nothing came out. Not even a croak. The crowd grew unsettled in no time, and the calls for me to start singing got louder and louder. No matter how hard I tried, though, my voice was completely gone, and soon, everyone was booing me off the stage.

  Clinging to my guitar, I turned and ran, but then a hand grabbed my wrist. “Sebastian,” said a voice that could only belong to Alex.

  I tried to get a good look at his face, but it was distorted like the rest of the stage. Tears welled in my eyes, but even though I couldn’t see him, just knowing he was with me eased my pain.

  “Sebastian,” the voice said again. “Sing for me.”

  Just then, Alex’s face came into focus. He smiled softly, wrapping his hands around my back and pulling me against his chest.

  Suddenly, the stadium was empty, and it was only the two of us at center stage. The spotlights above us snapped off with a dull, echoing thud. I knew our career was over after this, yet my body felt light. I didn’t want to run anymore; I just wanted to be in his arms.

  “Sing for me,” he said again.

  I opened my mouth, but instead of singing one of our songs, I improvised. I wanted to express how I felt about Alex, how he had saved me from a shame I couldn’t name or explain. The melody that came out felt so warm and familiar, yet unlike anything I had ever heard before. For some reason, I knew I was dreaming. I kept singing, repeating the phrases, trying to memorize the melody so I could sing it again when I woke up.

  “Sebastian,” someone else called from far away.

  Drums kicked in from the back of the stage, but the tempo was far too fast for what I was singing. They grew louder and faster by the second, drowning out my voice.

  “Sebastian,” it called again, louder this time.

  I couldn’t stop, though; I still hadn’t memorized the whole song.

  “Sebastian!”

  I opened my eyes.

  Morning sunlight streaked across the ceiling. Light knocks on the door echoed through the room. Alex was sitting next to me in bed, the comforter draped over his bent legs. He was still naked from last night, a deep sleep crease pressed into the back of his left shoulder. His hair was disheveled, and he wore a sly, sleepy smile.

  “How late is it?” I asked.

  He held out his phone to show me. It was half past five.

  More knocking at my door.

  “Yeah, we’re awake,” I shouted. Why was Nora so adamant about waking us up this early? Yesterday, we had decided not to go to the practice room until nine, since everything had gone so well, and we didn’t want to jinx it by overpracticing.

  “I am now, too,” Nora yelled through the door. “What’s with the singing?”

  “Singing?” My eyes darted to Alex, searching for an answer.

  He pulled the corners of his mouth up, scrunching his nose and eyebrows together. “I’ve heard of people speaking in their sleep before, but never singing.”

  It had only been seconds ago, but I had already forgotten. I had sung a song for Alex in my dream. Wait. What was the melody again? I had tried so hard to remember it, but now it was gone.

  “Well, I’m going back to bed now,” Nora said from the other side of the door. “You should get some more rest, too. It’s going to be a long night. You’ll be fine. They’ll love you. No need to overpractice.” She shuffled away.

  Alex tucked his phone under his pillow, turned to me, and draped his arms around my shoulders. “Are you okay?”

  “Was I really singing in my sleep?”

  “It was beautiful.”

  “I know. I could feel the song and the words flowing out of me. In my dream, I even realized I was dreaming and tried to remember it, but now it’s gone.”

  “It’s not,” he said with a chuckle. “At least not all of it.” He pulled his phone back out. “When I woke up to your voice and realized that you were fast asleep, even though you were using the full capacity of your lungs, I was somehow awake enough to record it. Wanna hear it?”

  My whole body tingled as I watched him navigate to the voice memo app. I leaned my head against his shoulder, pressing a soft kiss on his skin. “I probably don’t say it often enough, but I love you so freaking much.”

  After listening to the recording, we snuggled so close that I dozed off again until my alarm went off. It took me a few seconds to silence it, but once I did, I saw that Alex was already on his phone, doing his thing—he probably had been the whole time. Having seen it once during spring break, I immediately knew what was going on.

  When I came back from the bathroom after showering, he was still on his phone. Throughout breakfast, during Nora’s entire speech about everything we had to do today, and even on the drive to the rehearsal room, Alex was glued to the little screen in his hands.

  We had been in the rehearsal room for about ten minutes when Nora noticed that I was setting things up for our last practice alone while he kept staring at his phone.

  “Did something happen, Alex?” she asked.

  He was so engrossed in what he was doing that he didn’t hear her.

  “Leave him alone. This is normal,” I told her. “He’ll be ready and focused once I’m done here.”

  “Are you sure?” She waved her hands to get his attention.

  It took him a good fifteen seconds to finally look up. “Sorry—what?” Alex said, his eyes widening. He sat up and looked around the room as if he didn’t know where he was or how he had gotten there.

  I burst out laughing. “Nora, would it be okay if we had an hour to ourselves?”

  “An hour?” Her eyebrows shot to the ceiling. “I was planning to take more pictures and videos for your social media, so we have enough to post over the next few weeks.”

  “I know.” I set my guitar down. “But there’ll be plenty of time before we have to get ready.”

  She clutched her phone to her chest, looking at the ceiling with a sigh. “Okay. One hour. Sixty minutes. Una hora, no más. I’ll get us some water and an early lunch. But don’t make me regret it. I don’t want to find out you two have been doing everything but practicing.”

  “You won’t regret it. I promise.”

  Alex’s eyes darted between us as he tried to figure out what was going on.

  “Fine. I’ll see you then,” Nora snapped. She grabbed her jacket and purse from the couch and stomped out of the room, closing the door behind her.

  “What was that about?” Alex asked.

  “That was about what you’re up to.” I walked over, plopped down on the couch next to him, and tried to get a look at his phone. “I’ve seen you like this before.”

  “Sorry. I couldn’t help it. It also took my mind off the concert, which was actually kind of nice. I’ll stop now. I’m almost done, anyway.”

  “Stop now? No way. You’re going to show me what you’ve been working on.” I pointed to the mixing console. “Full volume, please.”

  Alex glanced at his phone, lips pursed, then jumped up and made his way to his laptop. After a few clicks, he tapped the spacebar to start the playback.

  My voice echoed quietly and alone from the PA system—until it hit a high note, and the roar of a whole orchestra joined it. Every hair on my body stood on end. The sound pressed me into the couch. I held my breath, unable to fathom the power of the hymn I was hearing. After the chorus that opened the song repeated, a guitar took over the melody as it always did in his demos.

  “This verse is missing because I hadn’t pressed record yet,” Alex said, cupping his ear toward the PA. His eyes stared into the void, as if he had shut the world out entirely.

  For the next three minutes, we listened to the song. It hammered itself into my head as if it had been there all along—which wasn’t far from the truth. It had come from my mind after all. I had just forgotten it. The song ended with my voice on a high note, echoing through the silence after the orchestra faded out. It mirrored the opening in a way that made me want to play it from the beginning again right away.

  Alex let the silence linger for a moment before speaking. “What do you think?”

  I only had one thought. It was crazy, and if he said no, that would be fine, but I had to say it. “I was wondering… would it be possible to add this to our setlist?”

  Alex made a face, his eyes dropping to his laptop. “It’s not as polished as the others, but I think it could work in a live setting. With live music, it’s better not to have too many fills. They tend to get lost in the room anyway. So…” He pursed his lips.

  “It might be a nice surprise for everyone, right?”

  “Most definitely.”

  By the time Nora came back, we had barely played the song all the way through twice. It had taken a while to tweak the orchestra and for me to come up with lyrics for the first verse. I begged her to leave us alone for another half hour, and after some complaining and persuading, she agreed. We focused entirely on this one song, and only when she returned did we move on to the rest of the setlist.

  After rehearsing, we ate the sandwiches Nora had bought, then packed up our things. The bar where we were playing that evening was kind enough to let us practice one last time at the venue before they opened.

  Raul, who was still hired as our driver by Nora—not that he had much say in the matter—picked us up again.

  The bar was a five-minute walk from Fremont Street, the historic entertainment district of Las Vegas. It wasn’t anything fancy, but it was big enough to have its own small stage. They hosted live music every other night to attract both locals and tourists, though most people came for drinks since all the musicians were unknown artists, like us. Admission was free, but we could ask for donations afterward.

  We spent the afternoon setting up our equipment and going through the setlist one last time with their sound engineer, Drake—a lovely dude with dreadlocks who wasn’t very talkative. But he asked the right questions to make sure we sounded as good as possible and was open to assisting Raul with the livestream.

  After we played through the entire setlist, the tiny audience—Drake, Nora, Raul, and the owner of the bar, who was restocking the fridges for the evening—applauded.

  “I’m happy,” Nora said after we finished the last song. “We’re ahead of schedule, the livestream test worked perfectly, and now that we’re done⁠—”

  “Actually,” I said into the microphone, abruptly interrupting her as it was still on. I leaned to the side to speak with her at a normal volume. “Actually, there’s one more song we’d like to practice.”

  “Guys, we talked about this. No need to overpractice.”

  “No,” I said into the microphone again. “This is a new one. We’d like to know if you think it’s okay to play it as well.”

  “A new one? This late? Oh, that’s why you made me leave this morning!” She turned to Drake and Raul, her mouth agape, as if hoping they would talk us out of it.

  But Raul just shrugged, and Drake gave us a thumbs-up.

  “We’ve got plenty of time to try out whatever you want,” Drake said, and Raul nodded in agreement.

  “All of you are driving me crazy.” Nora flopped into a chair, leaned back, and threw her arms up.

  “I thought you liked our songs.”

  “I do. I also like to be prepared.”

  “Then how about this? We play it once, and if you don’t think it’s ready, we won’t play it tonight.”

  “I get the final say?”

  “Yup.”

  “Okay. Deal,” she said instantly, her face like a stone wall, as if she was already set on saying no and just letting us play so we got that ridiculous idea out of our system.

  “You might want to get your camera out for this one.” I looked at Alex, who was standing behind me, half-hidden behind his laptop and piano keyboard. He clicked a few buttons, then nodded at me. I brought my mouth back to the microphone. “This song is called… wait. It doesn’t even have a name yet. So, here goes nothing.”

  The in-ear monitor I had gotten used to by now started playing a faint click that only I could hear. We used it to synchronize the live components with the pre-recorded parts. I counted to four, then opened my mouth.

  “They were calling out my name / Then they turned and cursed it / Booed me like a hurricane / Tore me from the surface.”

  On the last word, the orchestra came in. I closed my eyes because I couldn’t bear to look at the faces in front of me. Every other song we had played so far had been approved by enough people to make me feel confident, but with this one, I felt completely naked. The lyrics came from my subconscious. The melody had existed within me before I even realized it. This song was so much me it was scary.

  As we played, a new energy filled the room. We hadn’t had enough time to fill in the gaps in the first verse, so I played the melody on the guitar there and only sang the rest of the song. It was a magical yet frightening experience, and I was grateful to have this trial run with people I trusted before a room full of strangers, a thousand people online, and—worst of all—my family would hear it.

  When the last chord struck, I held the final note until it was the only sound left in the room. I opened my eyes as the silence left behind by my voice stretched on.