I glance back at Chelcie just when she looks at Olivia, thankfully stopping the onslaught of emotions being slung at me. Not sure if I can handle much more if I want to meet my man son without freaking him out.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude just then. I understand why he needs you with him. His brother, well … let’s just say those two might as well be two peas in the same pod.”

  Olivia giggles softly. “I don’t think you were rude at all.” She lets go of my hand and reaches out, pulling Chelcie forward with her hug. I want her back at my side the second she releases me. Chelcie holds my gaze over her shoulder, and her smile grows, and the sadness leaves her eyes. “I’m Olivia.” She pulls back and keeps Chelcie at arm’s length with her hands on her shoulders. “It’s really great to meet you.”

  Chelcie nods slightly. “You, too.”

  Olivia lets go and steps back to my side. When her hand is back in mine, I feel my nerves settle a little more. I’m becoming addicted to her touch.

  “Well, why don’t we go inside? They’re back in the game room. I figured that it would be good for you guys to be around manly things that can be good icebreakers and all. Would be better if we had the grill fired up already. I think men talk better around those, at least. Anyhow … it’s this way.”

  I shake my head, a small smile forming. Same old Chelcie. We follow her. I keep my eyes forward, not wanting to look around just yet. My feet and my hold of Olivia’s hand are the only things that I have some control over. My heart feels like it’s going to pound out of my chest. Chills dance across my skin, and my stomach feels as if it rolled right down to my feet.

  Fuck.

  I should have asked for a picture. Hell, I should have asked anyone in the past few days what he would look like at the very least. I should have done something to prepare myself for what I saw when we turned the corner and entered the large room.

  I vaguely see the impressive setup around me: pool table, arcade games, basketball toss, and a large bar in the corner—fully stocked if the amount of liquor is anything to go by. I can see a game on the large TV, but the only thing my eyes can focus on is the man in the room next to my brother.

  The fully grown man.

  Yeah. Should have asked for a picture.

  Olivia gasps, softly. I relax the tightness of my grip on her hand. She tightens hers, and I’m pretty sure her shock is for the same reason as mine.

  My boy looks just like me.

  Tall, taller than my brother who’s standing at his side. Blond hair, cut short and stylish, with a dusting of darker blond hair on his face that almost looks brown.

  He shifts and takes a step forward.

  When he swallows, I see his dimples.

  He reaches one hand up and runs it through his hair and down to rest on his neck, looking down and flexing his hold on his neck, taking two more steps.

  He’s still looking down. When he looks back up and eyes identical to my own look into mine, I have to clear my throat.

  Jesus.

  I take a step forward at the same time he does. Olivia pulls her hand away with a gentle squeeze.

  He reaches out.

  I reach out.

  I see my brother’s approving nod and small smile moments before my son’s body collides against my own. With a soft grunt from the impact, I hug him just as hard as he’s hugging me.

  I feel something settle deep in my soul. The warmth of it spreads out with the swiftness of a bullet, searing through all the tattered pieces of my heart and effortlessly repairing them. The few parts that hadn’t been able to be healed by just Olivia’s love. The ones that would have stayed broken without this reunion. Even with her light shining on them, there was only one way it could have been healed, and I’ve got him in my arms as the other looks at me from a few feet away with tears falling down her face without a single care.

  I left this town a dead man, and right now, I feel fully alive for the first time in longer than I can remember.

  I hug my son while he hugs me back, and thank God I’m alive. I realize I hadn’t truly felt alive once in my entire life.

  Not when I was growing up in the shitty house with an equally shitty mother.

  Not when I had joined the Marines and found my real family.

  Not even when I was screwing my way through life … searching for that feeling of being alive.

  I was as close as I could get to it when Olivia gave me her light, but it was this piece that I never knew was missing that tipped over the scales.

  We both pull back at the same time, and I look into eyes identical to my own as we both study the other silently. I was right. He’s tall, maybe a hair taller than I am. I can tell he’s got both my dimples, the nervous swallow giving them away. His hair, blond … no shock there. He kept it long on the top, styled in what I’m guessing is his fingers constantly pushing through the strands. The sides look light brown with the close cut he has.

  He looks good. He looks healthy—if the muscles on him are any indication. He looks … hopeful.

  “Not sure what to say when your dead dad comes back,” he says with a huff of laughter at the end. He shakes his head, looks down at his feet, and rubs the back of his neck.

  “Not sure what to say when I come back to life and meet my man son.”

  His lips twitch.

  “You’re happy?” I finally speak, my voice low with words meant for him only.

  “Have been. But life got a whole lot sweeter today, though.”

  He reaches out and slaps my bicep.

  “You only live once, old man,” he gruffs out, that damn deep voice of my man boy. “Or so I’ve been told that is.”

  I clear my throat. “That’s what I hear.”

  He grunts out a laugh and reaches out to give me another hug.

  Yeah, he’s taller than I thought he was.

  “Wished for you every Christmas and birthday for as long as I can remember. There’s no way I’m taking this gift for granted.”

  “I don’t deserve that. Left all of you,” I say, looking at my brother and Chelcie before focusing back on Zac. “I’m not sure I would have been the father you deserved, Zac. Looking at you, I hate that I missed your whole damn life, but I’m also thankful you were raised by two of the kindest people I know. Got their heart, I can already see that. Means the world that you want to know me. And … I can’t wait to get to know you.”

  “You, too.” He smiles, looking just like I did at his age.

  “God, it’s like looking in the mirror.” I whisper the words low, just for him.

  “Good to know I’ll still look good when I’m an old man,” he responds, a smile in his eyes. Those beautiful eyes of my boy.

  “Sound just like I did at your age too.”

  “Not always a good thing.” Chelcie giggles.

  “He seems to attract just as many female friends, too.” My brother laughs.

  And Zac, the spitting image of me, does just what I would have done at his age. He winks at me, and with a shrug, he says all I need to know.

  The apple really didn’t fall far from the tree. My boy is good looking and sounds like he has no trouble finding a date. If I had known what kind of magic was waiting for me with the right girl—my Livi—I would have been more … selective back then. It’s not my place to offer that fatherly advice, though. He either knows it or will figure out on his own.

  “I’d like to get lunch, if it’s good with you? Catch up on what I’ve missed?” I feel my awkward shrug like someone just put a spotlight on me. Why does this feel so damn scary?

  He’s quiet, looking behind him at my brother and his mom before turning around to face me again.

  “I’d really like that.”

  It took me long enough, but fuck does it feel worth all that time it took to be right here, meeting my son.

  My man son.

  We exchange numbers and make plans to meet the next day for lunch. He steps away and sits in a chair next to the two couches, the rest of us scattered about with me and Olivia with a hyper Chelcie, fretting about making sure everyone is “refreshed and hydrated” before my brother forces her to sit and calm.

  They look good together, Ash and Chelcie. He looks happy, and the way he has his wife pressed close to his side, he is also well loved. She’s spent more time bouncing her worried eyes between both Asher and Zac since we arrived. It’s good to see her relax when Zac sits down, relaxed and carefree.

  I reach my free hand over and grab Olivia’s hand that had been resting on my thigh, needing more contact. She’s been curled into my side with my left arm swung over her shoulders—keeping her close. The conversation flows easily around me. I join in when necessary, but I spend more time marveling on how life-changing this moment is for everyone. I keep my hold on Olivia and let her tether me to the ground. The more I look around at my brother and son, the more I feel my heart beating faster, growing and filling wider than I’ve felt in a long damn time. I relax the hold I have on Liv, taking a deep breath to calm my thoughts. Using her to keep me grounded.

  It’s not just this night that has my heart racing and my nerves firing like madness. It’s realizing just how much I owe the woman next to me for making this happen. For giving me back the life I had lost, the family I had left behind, and the son I have a chance to get to know now.

  She has breathed life back into me, and what do I do to repay her love?

  I keep a secret from her even larger than before. Hard to believe. I sit here with my family back, making promises together for our future now that we’ve reunited, and I’m keeping a monstrous secret from the woman who gave me the strength to take this chance I’m living right here in my brother’s home. There’s no way I could have done this without her, and for that, I owe her the truth. I can’t let us continue to grow closer to that beautiful future without her knowing it all.

  She’s given me my life back.

  I look around the room at the faces I never thought I would see again, the son I never imagined, and the woman who owns my heart.

  This is what life is about.

  Family.

  Love.

  What am I going to do if she can’t forgive me?

  I’m this fucking close to having a life I could never have dreamed of … and without her, I really would be a dead man, even with all of this.

  My son laughs at something Olivia says. The rich sound fills the room.

  I clear my throat and blink a few times. The emotions too damn thick as they war within me.

  The pressure in my chest keeps growing as the night continues and conversations flow. The whole time, I’m too afraid to move far from her, my heart not able to calm without her touch.

  Fuck me.

  If she doesn’t take what I have to tell her well and I lose her? I’m not sure my newly healed heart can handle that. It will break in a way I know not even this sweet life I’ve been given a second chance at will be able to mend it.

  My son laughs again.

  My mind goes to Riley, her sweet little giggle and crooked smile.

  Zac was that little, and I missed it all.

  Every damn step, word, and milestone.

  His laughter booms around the room. In my mind, I hear Riley’s echo in with the sound of his. I realize it was Olivia’s sweet giggles when she moves against my side with each one. I have no idea what’s so funny, having been lost in my damn thoughts for too long. It’s hard to think of Zac, easily six and a half feet tall, being as little as Riley was. She’s going to love him, too. Two giants for her to love. Thinking of Riley makes me miss her even more, which is saying a lot. In the months that I’ve been with her aunt, she’s wedged herself a giant spot in my heart.

  I look from Zac down to Olivia when her giggles become full belly laughs. I feel my lips tip as I watch her.

  Yeah, I definitely want more kids to fill this life I’m going to build with her.

  Marriage.

  Kids.

  I want to see her laugh like this with Zac. With Riley. And whoever we may add to our family there with us.

  I want to live, dammit.

  Maybe do that for the first time in my life, too.

  God, please let her forgive me.

  I look back at Zac, his eyes on me, and take a deep breath.

  I can’t have come this far to have true and honest happiness ripped from me the second I’ve found it.

  Right?

  “Faraway Tree” by Boatkeeper

  He’s been quiet.

  The whole ride back to the hotel was filled with commentary from the sports station he has on the radio. I tried to get a conversation going, but he only muttered some grunts here and there, sticking to silence while he drives. I called Ella to check on Riley, but she had fallen asleep so it was a short call that didn’t help fill the void. We had been having FaceTime calls every morning and night with our little bean, but still I missed her so much. I know Zeke does too. I saw how he was looking at all the kids that have been around our large group here in Georgia.

  When we got back, I excused myself to use the bathroom, wanting to give him a moment alone after such a highly emotional day.

  Before we left his brother’s house, Zeke made plans to go to lunch with Zac tomorrow.

  Zac.

  He’s such an incredible human. It’s uncanny to look at him and see so much of Zeke in him. Chelcie and Asher brought some pictures out a few hours into our visit. We sat there, all of us, and looked through the albums. Zeke had been hyper focused on each photo and story. I could have kissed Chelcie and Asher for giving him that. Letting him watch his son grow through the years with each album we looked through.

  After that, they pulled out the ones with a younger, wild-looking Zeke. Photo after photo of the man who I’m quickly finding has more layers than an onion.

  The “old” him, the one that he was before I knew him … aside from the initial shock of seeing the younger him and not seeing much of a difference in his son. They could have been twins. It’s mind blowing. Not just because they look so similar, but because the Zeke I know now—the one who matches the man in those photos—looks so different from the Drew I knew. Three versions of the same man all so different from the other. Sounds just as confusing as it is to me. I go between sneaking little glimpses at him to full-blown staring.

  One of these days, I might get used to how damn handsome he is, but that surely won’t be today.

  Secretly, I miss the beard. Though I will never admit that to him. Both shaved or not versions of him are simply perfection. However, I’m really going to miss that little burn I get when he kisses me deep and hard with that beard. Yeah, I’m surely going to miss that. His kisses are five star no matter what, though, so I’ll live.

  He clears his throat, and I come out of my lust-filled thoughts about him to give him my focus. I didn’t realize I was just staring at him.

  He settled in to the bed and put a basketball game on when we got back. Probably should just leave it and take the sign for what it was—that he wanted to be alone with his thoughts. Something not too easy to achieve when you’re in a shared hotel room.

  “I can go take a bath if you want some time alone to decompress, honey,” I offer, standing on the threshold of the bedroom after finishing up using the restroom.

  “I don’t need to decompress, Liv.” He doesn’t look away from the TV.

  “Maybe you don’t think you do, but honey … tonight was big for you. The adrenaline will crash soon.”

  He takes a deep breath and turns the TV off, turning his head to give me his attention. “Come here, Olivia.”

  “Maybe I’m good right here,” I smart, leaning against the doorframe of the bathroom.

  He cocks an eyebrow and gives me a playful smirk.

  “I’m just worried about you,” I tell him honestly. “Tonight was a lot. Hell, it’s all a lot, honey. More than a lot of people can handle alone. More than the average person will ever experience. I don’t know how to set aside that worry.”

  “Baby.” He sighs, patting the empty side of the bed next to him.

  “You have lunch tomorrow. You have lunch with your grown son, and you’re watching a game like today was just a normal day. Honey, I don’t know how to process the way you’re processing all of this.”

  He lets a small laugh out.

  “This isn’t funny, Zeke.”

  His eyes flash.

  His brow ticks up again.

  “No way, mister. I know that look in your eyes.”

  “Then get over here.”

  I shake my head.

  “Olivia,” he says in a deep and dark tone.

  I give a little huff that he only laughs a bit more at. My feet take me to the side of the bed regardless of the fact that he’s now finding humor in my concern for him. I look down at the handsome man lying on the bed and marvel in just how beautiful he is. Something I’ve done quite a bit since his makeover by Sway. I can see a mix of the old him and the new him blended together, something I can say for sure after seeing so many photos of a young and carefree version of him.

  “Come here.”

  “If I come over there, you’ll just try distracting me by getting me naked.”

  He grunts out a laugh but just silently pats the side of the bed next to his hip. I sigh but sit. His hand takes mine, and those stunning bright-blue eyes of his look into mine. He looks down at our hands, his thumb caressing my skin slowly.

  “I’m okay, Liv. Just taking the time to be thankful. Thanking God that he thought I deserved this second chance, and that he gave me you. No doubt, babe, I never would have gotten this gift had it not been for you.”

  I feel my brow furrow, watching his eyes when they go from mine up to them. His free hand coming out to run one finger lightly down the bridge of my nose, soothing the spot between my brows first.