I had no doubt it was the same way for Hudson and Jax.

  Hudson shrugged. “I’m not sure it’s possible to comprehend until it happens to you. How can any guy imagine that they’d wake up one day and one woman would become their everything? That one single female could make or break their entire life.”

  “Fuck!” I cursed. “How in the hell is a guy supposed to live through this? It’s torture.”

  Jax grinned. “It gets better. It’s only difficult until you realize that having the right woman can make you the happiest bastard in the world, too. It might be painful and confusing in the beginning, but it’s worth it.”

  “Definitely worth it,” Hudson agreed.

  I slammed my fist down on the table as I growled, “You better tell me how to get through the hard part of this first, because I feel like I’m losing my shit.”

  I wasn’t comforted as Hudson and Jax exchanged a knowing look before Jax said, “I can make things easy for you, but I doubt you’ll listen.”

  “Tell me,” I insisted.

  “Number one. Admit from the very beginning that you have absolutely no control,” Jax said as he held up a single finger.

  “Number two,” he continued as he held up a second finger. “Don’t try to fight any of it.”

  “And number three,” he said as he held up a third finger. “Nail her ass down to a committed relationship as soon as possible. It helps when you know she’s already yours. After that, it’s just a matter of working out the details.”

  I eyed Jax suspiciously before I looked at Hudson.

  “He’s right,” Hudson confirmed. “Half the pain is not knowing how to make her yours or how to make her happy.”

  I snorted. “Fuck! If I had those things figured out, I wouldn’t be asking for your help. I have no idea how she really feels about me. The chemistry between the two of us has always been there, but I need a hell of a lot more than to just get laid. Technically, we’re still casually dating.”

  Hudson shook his head adamantly. “Oh, hell no. That shit is dangerous.”

  “We’re friends, too,” I added.

  “Even worse,” Jax said with a frown. “You can’t really believe that being relegated to the friend zone is going to work in this situation, right? Because I can already tell that it will make you completely insane.”

  “Tried that?” I guessed.

  “And failed miserably,” Jax finished.

  “I’ve been waiting for her to decide when she’s ready to move to something more serious,” I groaned.

  “I have a feeling she’s already tried to tell you what she wants but you probably weren’t listening,” Jax mused. “Most likely, she’s clueless.”

  “That’s not possible,” I said through gritted teeth.

  “Nah. It’s definitely possible,” Hudson assured me. “Somewhere you two got your wires crossed. Look, Coop, you have to go after what you want. I’m not saying to run her ass over, but be clear about what you want and in what time frame you see that happening. She’s the one who’s still trying to get over her issues. Don’t confuse the crap out of her.”

  “I’m not,” I informed him. “At least, I don’t think that I am.”

  “If you’re not sure, she probably isn’t, either,” Jax said thoughtfully. “Check in with her. Make sure you know what she wants. No pressure, but if you screw this one up, you probably won’t get another chance. We all waited over thirty years to feel this way the first time.”

  “Glad there’s no pressure,” I said in an ornery tone.

  “Neither one of us is trying to be a smart-ass,” Hudson told me. “We’re just telling you the truth. And as far as helping her goes, there isn’t a whole lot you can do, Cooper. Listen to her when she wants to talk, and just be with her when she doesn’t. Jax and I both know that shit eats your guts out. When you care that much about someone, their pain really does become yours.”

  “All I want is to make her happy,” I confessed, feeling helplessly inept.

  “The stakes are a lot higher for you than they were a year ago with Fiona,” Hudson drawled.

  “Do you think I don’t know that?” I asked tightly. “I never expected to meet someone like Torie. I didn’t know it was possible for a woman to turn my whole life upside down. I’ve tried every mind trick I can think of to keep from making a total ass of myself in front of her. To slow things down just in case she doesn’t want the same things I do. I don’t know how to fucking keep that shit up.”

  We slept in the same goddamn bed every night and I was running out of patience and excuses as to why we shouldn’t be burning up the sheets every damn night.

  She wanted me.

  Fuck knew I wanted her.

  Wouldn’t we both feel better if we let ourselves drown in carnal bliss?

  “Jesus, Coop, you need to really talk to her. Does it really matter if you make an ass out of yourself if the end result is Torie being yours?” Hudson asked firmly.

  “No. It doesn’t matter,” I told him, being completely honest with him. “I’d make myself an idiot to the entire world if I thought it would bring the two of us closer. I guess I’m afraid that…it won’t.”

  “But it might,” Jax countered. “You’ve spent your entire life being the rational brother, Cooper. Your scholastic gifts have always been your reasoning ability, that lightning fast skill to evaluate every outcome and come up with the right answer. Things have always had to make sense to you. Love just doesn’t work that way, little brother. There’s rarely a correct answer, and taking a leap of faith quite frequently involves some pain along the way because you don’t always get a soft landing.”

  Hudson nodded. “You’ll probably have to take some risks that will never make sense to your reasonable brain.”

  “I’ve never been a risk taker. You know that,” I reminded them. “I’ve never had to be. I’m not saying that I’m not willing when it comes to Torie. There isn’t much I wouldn’t do to make her happy.”

  “That’s all you really need to know,” Jax explained. “It’s trial and error from here to figure out what will make her happy. She cares about you, Coop. It’s obvious whenever I see you two together. I know what it feels like to want to make all of her pain go away, and I know how frustrating it is when you can’t sometimes. Try to be patient. You’re helping just by being there for her, even though it doesn’t feel like it.”

  I nodded, eager to change the subject as I looked at Hudson and asked, “Do you think they have your wedding planned yet?”

  “Christ! I hope so,” he answered adamantly. “These have been the longest months of my life. I was ready to get married the minute I proposed.”

  Jax snickered, but for once, I knew exactly how Hudson felt.

  Torie

  “I think it’s going to be a beautiful wedding,” I told Taylor and Harlow in a wistful voice. “It doesn’t matter which venue you pick.”

  The three of us had spent much of the morning surfing through possible venues and gathering as much info as possible so Taylor could make a final choice.

  We’d finally taken a break, the three of us simply taking up space on Jax’s living room floor now that our work was done.

  Taylor smiled radiantly. “Hudson will be relieved when I finally set a date and get our venue. It’s hard to believe he actually thinks I’ll dump him before the wedding or something.”

  “He’s insecure?” I questioned.

  She nodded. “Can you imagine?”

  “Jax is, too,” Harlow shared. “I’ll never understand why a guy like Jax has any insecurities.”

  I cocked my head as I looked at Harlow and Taylor. “You don’t think they should be insecure because they’re rich and powerful guys?”

  They both nodded as Harlow added, “Not to mention the fact that they’re both incredibly hot.”

  “Being rich doesn’t give a person a pass in the insecurity department,” I said drily. “I can attest to that personally. We’re as human as the next person.”

  “How are things going with you and Cooper?” Harlow asked curiously. “Are the nightmares still bothering you?”

  I’d gotten to know both of these women better since we’d first met for happy hour. I talked to them both by phone and text, and seeing them at Hudson’s barbecue had felt like greeting old friends, even though we weren’t.

  The more I got to know them, the more I felt comfortable talking to them.

  Maybe we’d bonded over the fact that we were all former captives in a kidnapping, but we had a lot more in common than that.

  “The nightmares are better,” I shared. “And I’m not sure how things are going with Cooper. I’m not always sure what he’s thinking sometimes, and it’s still not all that easy to sleep with a man like him and not think about doing more than sleeping. But I wouldn’t trade our relationship for anything. He the most incredible guy I’ve ever known.”

  “He can be a hard man to read sometimes,” Harlow agreed. “I was a little intimated by him when we first met.”

  “Ditto,” Taylor said. “He’s so damn smart that he’s scary sometimes. He’s the only person, male or female, that can completely kick my ass at chess. Not that I’ve given up trying, but Cooper is always several steps ahead of me, and I was taught by a world champion. Honestly, I think Cooper could take any of the current champions, but he doesn’t seem to care about besting anyone. He just likes to play the game.”

  I shook my head. “I didn’t know he played that well.”

  “I’m not surprised,” Taylor remarked. “Cooper isn’t exactly the kind of guy who brags about his talents.”

  No, he wasn’t, which just made him that much more intriguing.

  He’d asked me if I played once, but he’d never suggested a game when I’d said that I did play a game occasionally with my brothers.

  No doubt our chess game would be over in a heartbeat if Cooper was as good as Taylor said. My chess skills were mediocre at best.

  “Cooper is cautious,” Harlow mused. “But once you get to know him, he’s also incredibly kind. He’s crazy about you, Torie. I can tell by the way he looks at you. Even when he’s talking to someone else, his gaze is never far away from you.”

  I shook my head. “I’m not sure what to think. I essentially threw myself at him a couple of times, and he backed off. We both did, actually, and things have never gotten quite that hot and heavy again. Maybe that’s a good thing since we’re still just casually dating. It’s not like we’re an exclusive item.”

  “No way,” Harlow said softly. “He never looks ready to back away when I see the two of you together. He looks like he wants to swallow you whole.”

  “I wish,” I said quietly.

  “No,” Taylor said. “She’s right. What makes you think he doesn’t want you?”

  “We sleep in the same bed every night and things have never gone further than kissing,” I said drily.

  Harlow frowned. “But don’t you think he’s doing that for you? Because you’re still having nightmares and some other issues from your kidnapping.”

  Harlow, Taylor, and Riley all knew that I’d been sexually assaulted during my kidnapping. In fact, it had really helped to have some conversations with Taylor since she’d gone through the same thing.

  “I’m not sure,” I replied uncertainly. “I’ve done everything but get naked in front of him to give Cooper the green light. I’m ready. God, I couldn’t even think about another man. Not when I’ve got someone like Cooper right there in front of me. I’d have to be crazy not to want him.”

  “Wouldn’t be the first time,” Taylor considered. “He’s been dumped before.”

  Wait. She was right. Cooper has been dumped before.

  “By someone who only wanted his money,” I agreed. “A female that ridiculous doesn’t count.”

  “But it hurts just as much,” Harlow said. “He’s insecure, just like Hudson and Jax can be. I don’t think it’s that he doesn’t want you, Torie. I think he’s more afraid that you don’t want him. Or that he’ll do something that will ruin your relationship. More than likely, he doesn’t want to rush you because of all the abuse you took in the Amazon.”

  “That’s crazy,” I sputtered. “Not even possible. Cooper Montgomery is every woman’s fantasy. But you might be right about his fear of rushing me. Although I have no idea how he could have missed about a thousand green lights from me lately.”

  Taylor lifted a brow. “Obviously, he isn’t every woman’s fantasy if he’s been dumped in the past. I think you need to seduce him.”

  I actually giggled at the thought. “I missed every single one of my seductress lessons.”

  “Believe me,” Harlow said drily. “I doubt it would take much judging by the way he looks at you when you’re together.”

  “Do you really think it’s possible that he thinks I’m still hesitant?”

  “Absolutely,” Harlow and Taylor said at the same time.

  Taylor continued, “He knows you’ve been through a lot, and if he’s anything like his brothers, he’s going to be afraid to push too hard. I think you should make it clear that you aren’t interested in dating other guys. Tell him you’re okay with making that commitment, because I’ll tell you right now that once Cooper falls, he won’t even know any other woman exists.”

  “The questions is,” Harlow chimed in. “Are you ready for Cooper and that kind of relationship? The Montgomery men can be a little…intense.”

  Taylor snorted. “That’s putting it mildly. They love hard, Torie, and I don’t think Cooper is an exception.”

  “He’s not in love with me,” I answered. “But I’m crazy about him. If he thinks I’m the one who isn’t ready to take this relationship to another level, he’s wrong.”

  “Then be bold,” Harlow suggested. “I think he’s going to be cautious because of your history if you don’t.”

  “I’m…okay. None of us can heal overnight from a kidnapping, right? Dr. Romero is helping me. I think it’s just going to take time. There are still some things that I haven’t managed to get over.”

  Harlow nodded. “I still struggle with some things, but it gets easier every day. Your situation was a little different, Torie. Taylor and I were deprived, but we didn’t have to go through the same physical recuperation that you did. Your injuries were pretty intense. I doubt you were really able to think about your emotional wellbeing for months.”

  I nodded. “I was in and out of surgery and physical therapy for months. I think because my physical injuries had to take priority, my mental health went on the back burner. I didn’t have anything left in the tank to deal with that for a long time.”

  “You’ll deal with your issues one by one as they pop up,” Harlow said. “They won’t all go away overnight, but putting them out there instead of burying them helps a lot. You know I’m always there for you if you want to talk, Torie. I might not have all the answers, but I’m always there to listen.”

  “Me, too,” Taylor said adamantly.

  I blinked back the spontaneous tears that welled up in my eyes.

  These women were so damn willing to treat me like a cherished friend, even though they didn’t know me very well.

  “I’m here for you guys, too,” I told them. “Thank you.”

  “No thanks necessary,” Harlow said sincerely. “Taylor and I had each other, which made things easier once I got my head on straight. You went through your ordeal all alone.”

  “My brothers are supportive, but it’s not always easy for me to talk to them about this. It’s hard for them to hear about what happened. They feel guilty, even though they have no reason to feel that way,” I explained.

  “Neither one of us has siblings,” Harlow said. “But every woman needs other woman to talk to sometimes. We understand each other.” She paused before she added, “It looks as though you have another male admirer.”

  I smiled at her as I rubbed the belly of Jax’s golden retriever, Tango. “He’s such a sweet boy.”

  Harlow stroked Molly, Jax’s adorable Lhasa Apso as she answered, “Both of these monsters are sweet when they want to be. Molly here helped with my nightmares a lot. Maybe you should take her home with you for a while.”

  I shook my head. “No way. She’d be crying for you and Jax, and my nightmares aren’t really that bad anymore. I do find it amazing that she can actually sense your nightmares, though.”

  “She’s a pretty amazing girl,” Harlow agreed.

  “The center and the whole program is wonderful,” I told her. “I think I’d be in trouble if I visited there more often. I think I’d get extremely attached. I’m not sure how Cooper has managed to stay dogless.”

  Harlow rolled her eyes. “He’s not. He just says that he is. That man is attached to every single dog at the center. He’s just never singled one of them out. He usually spends more time there than Jax does, and he takes as many canines as he can manage out running as often as he can.”

  “So, they’re essentially all his dogs,” I considered out loud. “He just keeps them all at the same place.”

  “Exactly,” Harlow answered emphatically. “You probably haven’t seen it yet, but Cooper practically goes into mourning when one of the trained dogs goes to a new owner. Don’t let him tell you he doesn’t get attached.”

  I smiled as I kept stroking Tango’s silky fur, not at all surprised by what Harlow had just revealed.

  Cooper might be the quiet one, but the man’s emotions obviously ran a lot deeper than he wanted anyone to believe.

  Cooper

  “Was it really necessary for you to go back to sleeping at your condo?” I asked Torie as I watched her play with one of the puppies at the training center the following Friday.

  I’d just finished taking several dogs for a run while Torie had taken a group of unruly puppies out for a walk.

  We’d followed this same routine for the last several days, ever since Torie had decided that her dreams were under control enough for her to sleep alone.