This brings on the empathy. Whatever happened to lead us to this very moment, it’s obvious talking about this takes a lot out of him. Am I apprehensive? Hell yes. I’m not letting my guard down, but dammit I deserve answers.

  There’s a constricting feeling in my throat as I swallow the now large lump that almost suffocates me from the inside. I keep my teeth clenched together in order to prevent my jaw from seizing. I can’t lead on that I feel threatened.

  A car passes ours going way above the speed limit. The sudden rush of air blows against the truck, rocking it a couple of times before it dissipates.

  Garver stares forward as if all of his hidden answers are waiting at the horizon. He sighs heavily then chortles to himself. “This is probably going to sound like I’m making it up.”

  “I know you aren’t,” I say with a consoling tone.

  “My mom has always had problems. Her family dynamic was old fashioned. Small town. Her family were one of the first settlers. They lived on one plantation and passed down traditions and expectations with each generation. My mom, well she was always defiant. She had two older brothers. One died when he was three. Hit by a passing truck after wandering off. The other hung himself when he was a teen. My mom was the one who found him. She started acting out after that, including seeing someone her father didn’t approve of.”

  Ugh, suddenly the posters from the nineties make sense. My room is the one that belonged to his uncle. He most likely hung himself in the same room I sleep in each night. It also explains why the room seem untouched. Most parents who lose children keep the room the same to remember them. This can’t get worse. Can it?

  I have to stay focused on one thing at a time. “Your dad?”

  “Yeah. Together they were bad. People still tell me how they’d been caught stealing and vandalizing. One time her father had to pick her up from the jail. According to Frank, her father beat her so hard with a switch she couldn’t walk for a week. He thought he could beat the devil out of her. What broke her was finding her brother the way she did. She blamed herself, saying she could have prevented it. She could have told someone about the abuse before it got so out of control. She never even talked to a doctor or counselor about what she was experiencing. Then she was shipped off to college overseas like it would fix her, and keep her away from my dad. She spent two and a half years abroad, and from what everyone says it changed her. Her father paid for the full ride, but refused to allow her to come home and visit. It was like he was determined to teach her a lesson, his way or the highway. When she came home they say she was better, resolved and together.

  She obtained a great job working at the Board of Education as a special needs assistant. My grandfather thought he’d won the battle between him and Satan.

  One day she just up and disappeared. No one knew why she left, but when she returned she was determined to be with my dad. They ran off and got married. Everything started to go downhill from there. The family discovered she been in contact with my father the entire time. They distanced themselves from my grandfather for years. Then my grandmother died. She was washing the second story windows and the ladder she was standing on collapsed. She was in her sixties and broke her hip. During surgery she got an infection and never recovered. She was dead a week later. Neither my mom nor my dad spoke to my grandfather at the funeral. As they were leaving the cemetery, he stopped my mom to tell her she wasn’t welcome at the wake, and as far as he was concerned he didn’t have any family left. That’s when she had her second breakdown. First she wouldn’t get out of bed. She stopped eating and taking care of herself. Then Mom’s father died six months later. No one even knew until someone from his church congregation showed up at the house and found him deceased. She was lost. What was worse was that my dad couldn’t fix her. He took to drinking to be able to ignore what was going on right in front of him. It got worse when they moved into her family home and she discovered she was pregnant with me. They’d always struggled. Having a home without a mortgage would seem like a blessing. Nothing improved though. After time, she’d have episodes of manic behavior. She’d be missing for days and show up like nothing happened. She started losing time altogether. There were some days where she didn’t know my name. Dad’s drinking came with his own side effects. He got violent and would often beat on mom like it would knock her out of her mental state. One night she just cracked. What’s worse is that I truly believe it was the one time where she was one-hundred percent coherent. I was too young to understand it all, too young and gullible to comprehend it wasn’t normal.” He quiets as he suddenly realizes he’s confessed so much. His head falls forward and his eyes squint, like it pains him to talk about this.

  I’m still in shock, and now I’m equally sad.

  “How horrible, Garver. Jesus, I’m so sorry. That must have been awful for you.”

  “I watched it happen. A lot of people in town even accused me of doing it instead of her.”

  “You were just a kid.”

  “Yeah. Kids have been known to kill people though. Little kids committing horrible acts and then being charged as adults.”

  His comment puts me on high alert even though it doesn’t come out in a threatening way. It’s eerily quiet. Another vehicle blows by. Seconds later, my phone rings.

  Feeling like it’s a lifeline, I pick up as quickly as humanly possible. “Hello?”

  Dad’s voice fills the other end of the call. “You guys headed back yet?”

  “Yeah, we’re on the way. Why, what’s up?”

  “I’ve just got some great news. It’s nothing I want to talk about over the phone. It’s a surprise. I’ll see you two when you get here.”

  My eyes close when I imagine telling my father everything that’s been revealed. Whatever surprise he has in store will be thrown in the gutter. It makes this all the more pressing. I want, no I need to get as far away from Garver as possible so I’m able to process everything I now know. “We will be there in about ten minutes, Dad. I love you.” I have to end the call this way, not because I’m used to saying it all the time, because a small part of me fears that I may never see him again. If Garver is as crazy as his mother he could decide we aren’t going back to the house, but instead take me somewhere they’ll never find my body. I’m overreacting. Please, let me be overreacting.

  Chapter 18

  The next ten minutes are excruciating. I’m avoiding looking in Garver’s direction in fear he might be staring at me with those mysterious eyes that hold so many different truths. In all of the serial killer movies I’ve devoured they seem to make their confessions right before killing the person they confess to. Odds are not in my favor. The sooner I’m out of this vehicle, the better my chances are at survival.

  And yes, my mind is taking me to dark places, even when I’m questioning the sincerity of his feelings for me.

  A celebratory moment comes when we hit the dirt lane. As soon as I’m able to exit the truck I can run to my father and tell him everything. He will protect me with his life. He’ll call the police. They’ll charge Garver for breaking into our home, invasion of privacy, and attempted assault. At least the first two will stick. As of right now he hasn’t physically made any attempts to harm me or my father. In fact, he’s only ever been kind and helpful to the both of us. “Can you do me a favor, Soph?”

  “Yeah,” I answer even though I’m not sure I can.

  “Don’t tell your dad about today. I’ll tell him myself when I’m ready. I don’t want him judging me, not until I can make him proud of the person I’m becoming.”

  I’m so confused I want to scream.

  I spot Dad as we come to a halt. Garver manages to hop out before I’m able to comprehend what’s happening. He and Dad approach each other, my father’s face full of happiness. “You’re not going to believe the call I just got,” he begins.

  There’s something evidently pressing with his enthusiastic tone. “You two are never going to believe who I just heard from.”

  He says it like he wants us to guess, but since I have more important things to discuss I refrain from offering what I think it could be.

  “Last weekend Garver and I built a ladder tree stand for one of the locals. Well, he was so impressed at the craftsmanship, he told the owners of the sportsman shop a town over. He got in contact with me this afternoon and asked if we would be able to make him twenty more for the next hunting season, with the potential of more depending on how fast the first ones sell. He’s willing to pay double what I charged the guy from town.”

  “Dad, that’s awesome. Do they take long to build?”

  He motions to Garver. “Not with this guy helping me. We knocked one out in about three hours. With Garver living here we can do one a night and a couple on the weekends. The best part, it’s going to be an extra six grand after the first twenty. This will be in addition to my salary. If this works out for us, I may have unknowingly started a new business that will help pay for your future, Soph, and Garver’s too. I’m willing to pay him one hundred for every one he helps me build. Honestly, I wouldn’t even have this opportunity without him. He found the guy looking for someone to build a stand. He helped me knock it out in one afternoon.” He looks to Garver with hope and pride. “What do you say, boy? Want to be my partner in this new endeavor?”

  I open my mouth to announce it’s not going to happen. I’m prepared to confess everything I’ve learned, but when I catch the endearment and optimism in my father’s eyes, I can’t bring myself to hurt him. Deciding to wait until I can further assess everything I know, since he overreacts when I don’t have all the facts, I simply congratulate them on their project I knew nothing about and head inside.

  I’m in the laundry room folding clothes when the sound of the back porch door catches my attention. I turn to find Garver coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist. Gut reaction sends me spinning around, backing up until I’m against the dryer. He doesn’t see this as an escape for me. Instead he narrows the distance between us until his body is pressed against mine again. “This day just keeps getting better, Soph. For a while there I thought your dad didn’t even like me. Then he goes and invited me into your home, teaches me his trade, and treats me like family. You have no idea how grateful I am for the both of you.”

  At this very moment I loathe this dude. All of his false truths, or whatever they can be construed as, it’s too much to digest. Being within close proximity of someone who could possibly want to harm me causes my body to react when words won't come out. I’m shaking, my eyes dart to his, as if I could possibly be able to read what he’s thinking.

  It hurts to feel this way. It hurts so much, but I’m not the same broken girl now. I’ve lost everything and still survived. I watched my father almost drink himself and our future into an early grave. I’m done being the victim. I’m done being fragile. It’s time to come from the ashes and take charge of how things are going to go from now on.

  It’s important to be smart about my next moves. Just in case Garver isn’t the person he claims to be – okay let’s face it, he’s obviously not who I assumed he was. Everyone warned me. I chose to follow my heart and my desire to have companionship. I got myself into this mess, and without my father getting hurt in the long run, I’m going to get us out of it.

  The new business opportunity Garver has with my father is a chance for us to get ahead. We’re talking thousands of dollars. If this motherfucker thinks he can play us he’s got another thing coming. Paybacks are a bitch, and he’s about to see a side me he’s yet to discover.

  Too much?

  His hot breath traces the nape of my neck. I can feel a burning in my eyes as I allow it to happen. There’s nothing I want more than to lift my knee and make contact with his scrotum until he keels over, wincing and crying in the most imaginable pain.

  His lips graze across my chin, finally finding my mouth. Would it be inappropriate to head bunt him?

  “I have a lot to do, Garver.” It’s the easiest way to get him to back off without leading on that something is wrong. At least, that’s what I thought.

  “Oh come on. Your dad is outside. Just give me a little attention, Soph. It’s not every day I confess how much I love you. I mean, that came out wrong. I mean, today is the first day I’ve said it, we’ve said it. I think we should celebrate. I need to feel close to you. It’s already been one hell of a day.”

  You got that right, you lying asshole.

  It’s like my mind is smacking me from within. ‘Get away from this liar, Sophie’, and as I search for an escape, Garver continues to molest me with his hands, bringing one up my thin t-shirt until he’s cupping my bra. His lips are kissing my ear, that breathy heat only making me sweat as I contemplate my exit.

  Pushing him away, I quickly spin around to press the button for the dryer to start, then sort of shove him out of the way with a large laundry basket of clothes I’d been folding. “If I don’t get this done I won’t be able to relax later. Once I’m done I’ll make you guys something to eat.”

  “Are you mad at me for something?” He’s following behind me.

  Is your conscience guilty? It’s what I want to say, though refrain. I’m going to keep bottling my feelings until I can throw the whole jar at him.

  As soon as I’m free I’m calling Frank. I know we don’t talk much, but I’m hoping he can shed light on what’s going on. He’s always talked highly of Garver, as if he considers him a son, but I’m hoping if I tell him what’s been discovered he’ll talk to me. I’m now wondering why Frank hasn’t once mentioned that Garver used to reside in my house. Obviously, it should have been at least joked about by now. Garver, Frank, and everyone at school kept me in the dark. The bitch squad tried to warn me, but I was too stubborn to consider they were actually looking out for me.

  Shit! No wonder Garver is my only friend. Or was. I don’t even know what he is. Everyone else wants nothing to do with him. How could I have been so blind? So stupid?

  I know how, because the truth has been right in front of me this entire time. I came to this town determined to get out. Garver took advantage of my situation. He knew what I was going through because he’d been watching me.

  Oh God. The room is spinning. I grip the laundry basket tighter. My stomach knots, and bile rises to my throat again. I’m going to throw up this time.

  Dropping the basket, I dash to the bathroom and start hurling before I can even put the lid back down to lean on. Stupid men! Why is it so hard to put the damn seat down?

  The trouble with love is ...

  The trouble with love is knowing what’s right but doing the opposite, because one pain outweighs the other. I hate this. I hate that he’s holding my hair back as a barf. I hate that he’s the whole reason I’m sick. I hate that he’s doing something so sweet. I hate that it could all be part of his master plan to get my father and I to leave town.

  “Do you need me to get your dad?”

  “No,” I murmur after spitting what’s left in my mouth. “I’m fine. Probably a virus.” When I stand he’s already at the sink, pulling off the hand towel and wetting it before offering it to me. “You look green,” he tells me with a disgusted grimace.

  “Yeah, my stomach is churning. I better get in bed until I feel better.”

  He takes me by the hand and walks with me up the stairs. All I want is for him to leave me alone. Thanking him once we reach my bed, he runs out and returns with the bathroom wastebasket. “Just in case you need to get sick again. Just text me and I’ll come up if you need me.”

  He pauses when he hits the threshold. “Need a drink or anything else? Tylenol?”

  I cuddle with the pillow as I reply, “no”, and close my eyes.

  Garver offers a half smile. “You mean everything to me, Soph. Feel better.”

  “Thanks.” I manage in a whisper.

  Once the door shuts I’m finally able to break down. I hold in the wails until I hear the back porch slam shut again, signaling that he’s gone outside to work on the tree stands with my father. While my emotions are in overdrive, I pull out my phone and Google his name.

  Garver Brauns, Herald Heights.

  The only thing that comes up are articles from when he played football and baseball for the high school, and one as far back as little league. I should’ve known this since he was a minor when everything went down. I guess I expected a criminal record. Biting the bullet, I check social media for Cassidy and start typing out a quick message, but something makes me stop. We are mortal enemies at this point. I’ve called her names and been a bitch since day one, and maybe she’s been that way back, but what’s to say she won’t run and tell Garver I’m snooping around? I can’t take the chance of this backfiring. It’s the same with Frank, I have to tread lightly.

  It’s not until I wake that I have come to realize I’ve cried myself to sleep. Everything has left me drained, confused, and over-emotional. I want to scream, to open my window and call for my father to save me. Instead I slide off my bed and begin removing the blankets and sheets. They’re full of memories with Garver and they need to be cleaned, bleached until they smell like fresh laundry and sanitizer. They can’t smell like him, like the guy who betrayed my trust, the guy who has a hold of my heart and may want to destroy it.

  The door creaks as I’m standing over my stripped bed staring down at it. I know it’s him. The hair stands on my arms and I get this weird feeling like I’m in danger. “Soph? How are you feeling? Your dad said you fell asleep. I sent him up to check on you an hour ago. Did you get sick in your bed?”

  “I, uh, yeah, I couldn’t get it in the bucket.” Bending down, I quickly ball up the sheets and blankets and toss them into my basket. “It’s just a little but it will probably smell bad,” I lie.

  He scoffs and comes in to take the basket from me. “I’ll put these in the wash for you. You want to lay in my bed until they’re done?”