My jaw fell open as I stared at the message. Somehow, I convinced my brain and my fingers to work, and I replied, What do you mean?

  He was typing for a long time, probably unaware of how fast my heart was racing as I waited to find out exactly what it was he wanted me to turn loose in bed. Finally, the message came through:

  Watching you play? It turns me the hell on. You ever watched a porno where the guys get rough? Throw each other down, fuck hard enough to break furniture? That’s what I like.

  My heart was beating impossibly fast now, and my dick was getting impossibly hard. Throw him around? Fuck him hard? He’d said he was into that. And now he wanted me to do it? Oh, God.

  He started typing again: You won’t hurt me. You’re too conscientious for that. But if you want to make it hurt a little? ;)

  Oh. Wow. He wasn’t done yet either.

  You’re probably not allowed to bite players, he mused. Those rules don’t apply in my bed.

  I laughed. I didn’t see myself biting him, but I dug the enthusiasm. I like the sound of all this rough stuff. The way we’ve done it has been fun, but hell yeah.

  Thought you’d be onboard. ;)

  My fingers barely cooperated enough to respond, It’s sex with you. Of course I’m onboard.

  The response was a grinning devil emoji.

  And oh my God, tomorrow couldn’t get here fast enough.

  We didn’t waste a second.

  As soon as my front door closed behind him, I had Cole pressed up against it, and we made out furiously as he raked his hands through my hair.

  “I missed you,” I whispered hoarsely against his lips. “Jesus, Cole. You have no idea.”

  “Mmm, I think I do.” He slid his hands into my back pockets and pulled me flush against him, the promising thick ridge of his hard-on between us making my pulse race. “I’ve been counting down until you got back.”

  “Yeah?” I started down his neck, loving the taste and scent of him and the heat of his skin against my lips. “Have you?”

  “Uh-huh. Especially since you’ve been spinning me up every damn night.”

  I grinned against his throat. “Oh, so you’re saying that worked?”

  “You better believe it.” He rubbed his dick harder against mine. “I want you so fucking much.”

  I came up and found his mouth again, and we were off and running, making out and groping and pulling at clothes. The bedroom was only a few steps away, but I couldn’t make myself call a timeout long enough to get in there. That meant letting go of him. Breaking this kiss. Not having his hot body and insistent hands on me.

  Somewhere in the groping and kissing and spinning each other up, his shirt came off. Now I had my hands on his hot, bare skin, and I loved how he moaned when I ran my palms all over his back.

  “Were you serious?” I asked between messy kisses. “About getting rough?”

  “Oh yeah.” He tugged at my shirt. “Taking it slow is fun, but there’s nothing like throwing each other around and—” He cut himself off by kissing me, and the pure wanton need finished the sentence just fine.

  Experimentally, I slid a hand up into his hair and grabbed it, and Cole gasped as his entire body tensed. For half a heartbeat, I thought I’d gone too far and done too much, but then he released a ragged, “Oh, God” that was made of pure, trembling arousal.

  “You like that?” I asked.

  Cole moaned, squeezing his eyes shut. “So much.”

  Still gripping his hair, I bent and started kissing up and down his throat, loving the way he trembled and gasped. This had been one of my favorite things from the start, but when he was so turned on he was shaking, it was unbearably hot.

  As my lips grazed his collarbone, part of our earlier text conversation ran through my mind:

  You’re probably not allowed to bite players. Those rules don’t apply in my bed.

  In the moment, I hadn’t thought that was something I’d be into, but not that I was kissing along his shoulder, his hot skin soft against my lips…

  Fuck it.

  I sank my teeth into his shoulder.

  “Shit!” Cole’s whole body tensed as he sucked in a sharp breath. “Ungh. Wow. Baby…”

  I laughed and kissed the place I’d bitten, which sent another shiver through him. “So you do like biting?”

  “Uh-huh.” He sounded dazed. “Told you I like it rough.”

  “Then let’s get into the bedroom and get really rough.”

  His lips parted and his eyes widened. “Yes, please?”

  As soon as we were in the bedroom, we left our clothes on the floor and pulled each other down into bed. I shoved him onto his back, and he stared up at me with wide eyes. Before I could even doubt myself or ask if he liked this, he grabbed the back of my neck and dragged me down, and his kiss almost had me coming between us right then and there.

  We were all over the place. Him on top. Me on top. Him again. Hands were rough and bruising. Teeth grazed skin. He bumped a couple of tender spots from hockey, but I didn’t care.

  “Get on your back,” he ordered, and who was I to argue?

  I did as I was told, and when he started down my neck again, I knew where he was going. I’d been with him enough times to instantly recognize that eager downward trajectory, and I bit my lip as he continued over my chest and my stomach.

  “Fuck yeah.” I closed my eyes as he closed his lips around the head of my cock. “Oh, yeah…”

  He swirled his tongue, then slowly—so, so slowly—deep throated me. I loved when he did that. And then he did it again. I sank back onto the pillow, squirming as much as I could without moving my hips.

  I carded my fingers through his hair, careful not to put any pressure on his head as he slid his lips up and down my cock. His mouth was beyond amazing. His kiss made me forget my own name, and the way he gave head had my whole body soaring in ways jerking off could never aspire to do. He hummed around my cock, licking and teasing and even letting his teeth very, very gently graze the head, which made my breath catch and my back arch every time.

  “Don’t make me come,” I pleaded. “Not till I fuck you.”

  The way he moaned and licked up and down my shaft, he was about to make me come anyway, but then he crawled up over me and pressed his swollen lips to mine.

  “Definitely don’t want to make you come yet,” he panted, pausing to brush our lips together again. “I want you to fuck me until your neighbors need a cigarette.”

  A helpless sound escaped my throat.

  “Fuck me,” he ordered. “God. Just… Put me on my back and fuck me.”

  Put him on his back? Don’t mind if I do?

  I grabbed him and flipped him onto the mattress, driving a ragged, “Oh, baby, yeah” out of him.

  “Fuck me now,” he half-demanded, half-pleaded. “Just like this.”

  “Just like this?”

  He nodded. “And do it hard.” I couldn’t tell if he was begging or ordering—maybe both—but hell if I was going to say no either way.

  “Lemme get a condom.”

  Another nod, and he stroked himself as I got up to get everything we needed. After I’d put on the condom, I fingered him a little, but then he shook his head. “Just fuck me. I’m good.”

  “Are you—”

  “Now, baby. Please.”

  I wanted to hesitate—I’d barely stretched him—but he knew his limits, and I wasn’t going to say no to the hunger in his voice.

  As I withdrew my fingers, he murmured, “Oh, yeah…”

  This position had been a little awkward the first time, but we’d done it enough that I guided myself to him without any trouble. I met some resistance pushing in, but before I could suggest prepping him more, Cole murmured, “That’s good. More.”

  “You sure?”

  Biting his lip, he nodded, and when I did as I was told, his throaty groan made my spine tingle. He cupped his balls with one hand, probably to keep them from getting pinched between us, and he absently kneaded and stroked himself too, like he needed the stimulation.

  As I picked up a little speed, his brow tightened, but he didn’t tell me to stop.

  “This doesn’t hurt?” I asked.

  Eyes closed, Cole grinned. “Not in a bad way, no.”

  Oh. Ooh. He did say he wanted it rough, didn’t he? I didn’t know how much I’d want to be roughly topped, but if this was what he liked, then I was happy to give it to him.

  I thrust in hard, and he whimpered, so I did it again. And again. And again. This was still a tough position, though, so I sat up on my knees and lifted his hips off the bed.

  Cole managed a choked, “Oh, yeah,” just before I slammed into him like my life depended on it, and oh fuck, those moans and the way he squirmed—he was so damn hot.

  He still kept one hand over his balls, and with his other, he started pumping his cock. As soon as he did, he clenched around me, making my breath catch and my head spin, so I fucked him hard.

  “Oh God, Parker…” He squeezed his eyes shut and arched, stroking himself so fast his hand blurred. “I’m gonna come. God, baby, don’t stop…”

  I gritted my teeth and tried to fuck him even faster, and I was rewarded with another strangled groan. Jesus. I didn’t think I’d ever seen anything hotter than the sight laid out in front of me—Cole, his skin flushed, his features tight, his ass taking my cock deep as he arched and shook while cum shot across his taut abs. My God, he was perfect, unraveling in front of me and because of me, and I just… I fucking lost it. I cried out and thrust deep, and I just barely heard his moan of encouragement over my own cursing and gasping as I exploded inside him.

  He relaxed. Then I did.

  My arms wanted to drop out from under me, but I held myself up so he could still breathe. When I was sure I could hold myself up, I pulled out, got rid of the condom, and lay beside him.

  Immediately, Cole curled against me, and I wrapped my arm around his shoulders as he put his head on my chest.

  “So is that…” I paused to try to catch my breath. “Is that how rough you like it?”

  Cole looked up at me with gleaming eyes that said we weren’t done tonight. Caressing my face with a shaky hand, he purred, “Baby, that’s exactly how rough I like it.”

  “Good. Because that was hot as fuck.”

  “Mmhmm.”

  “Shower?”

  “In a minute.”

  I pulled him closer, and he sighed happily as he relaxed against me. I pressed a kiss to the top of his head, and we just lay there as the dust settled.

  Wow. The adrenaline rush of a game. The feverish intensity of sex. Those were both addictive as fuck, but neither compared to this—the quiet moments in bed with Cole. Especially after we’d been so rough, the softness was even more intoxicating.

  In the back of my mind, I worried that this was wrong. Not the part where I was hiring him for sex—I’d gotten over that a long time ago—but this affectionate intimacy. We’d always cuddled after sex, but lately it had started to feel… different.

  What are we doing? I stroked his hair. Because I don’t think this is what I hired you to do.

  I was afraid to say it out loud, though. Like if I did, he’d get spooked. Or he’d tell me it was all in my head and this really was nothing more than sex for hire. This wasn’t affection. It was like free coffee at a car dealership—something they gave everyone to make them feel special and cared for so they’d spend more money.

  I didn’t believe that was what this was, though. It couldn’t be. Maybe I didn’t have anything to compare it to, since I’d never been with anyone else, but it was definitely more intense than the beginning. He’d been gentle and sweet from day one, patiently guiding me into getting physical, but this was…

  This wasn’t just physical, was it?

  Chapter 26

  Cole

  “I swear, every time we fuck,” I said as I sank back into Parker’s bed, “my legs wobble the whole time we’re in the shower.”

  He laughed, pulling the covers up over us. “I feel like I should take that as a compliment.”

  “Oh, you should.” I curled against his broad, warm body. “You fuck me so good, my knees shake. Trust me when I say that’s high praise.”

  He laughed as he wrapped his arm around me. “Good. That’s—oh shit!” He suddenly sat up, sending a bolt of panic through me before he said, “We never set up tonight on the app!” He reached for the nightstand, probably for his phone, but I stopped him and gently pulled him back toward me.

  “Don’t worry about it.” I draped my arm over him and kissed him softly. “It’s fine.”

  “But we’re…”

  “It’s one night. The details are… Honestly?” I ran my fingers through his hair. “I just want to be here.”

  He gazed down at me, his expression so sweet it almost hurt. “Really?”

  I nodded, ignoring the way my heart jumped into overdrive. “You’ve paid me a lot of money already. One night of this won’t hurt anything, will it?”

  “Are you sure?” He covered my hand with his. “Because I don’t… I mean, I don’t want you to think I’m trying to get something for nothing, you know?”

  Grinning, I leaned in closer and brushed my lips across his. “I don’t know if you noticed, but even when you don’t factor in the money, I’m getting the opposite of nothing out of this.”

  “You… Seriously?”

  “Mmhmm. Or wasn’t it obvious by the dirty looks your neighbors gave us?”

  Parker laughed, cracking through the tension. “Okay. Okay. There is that.” He met my gaze again. “But is that enough? I mean, given why we started…”

  I curved my hand behind his neck. “Trust me, baby. It’s enough.” And then I kissed him, and whatever argument he might’ve had at the ready, I could feel him letting it go as he relaxed into my kiss.

  Maybe he was right to bring it up. In fact, he probably was. But damn it, I couldn’t help myself. As much as I’d been wanting and needing everything we’d done tonight, asking him to pay for it just felt… wrong. I sold sex without blinking, but I couldn’t put a price on this, and that should have had alarm bells clanging in my head.

  If it did, I couldn’t hear them over the soft sounds he made as he kissed me and ran his hands all over me. Fuck, his hands and mouth were so sure now, and I loved that. Wasn’t this guy a shy, timid virgin, like, last week?

  He definitely wasn’t now. He was relaxed and calm, touching me like he meant it instead of like he was afraid I might break or protest.

  So why was I having a hard time relaxing? Why did his realization about the lack of a booking have me off-balance even as I’d told him it was nothing to worry about?

  It was hard to keep my thoughts straight while I was touching and kissing him like this, but even as the kisses deepened and the touches turned needier, I couldn’t help thinking this was dangerous territory, hooking up without settling up. We were already texting constantly, not to mention FaceTiming. He was already spending more time on my mind than any client was supposed to.

  What are we doing and why don’t I want to stop?

  I broke the kiss and gazed at Parker, and my heart fluttered.

  Oh. That’s why.

  “Cole?”

  “Hmm?” I shook myself and looked up.

  Watching me from the other side of the couch in our living room, Bryce cocked his head. “You okay? You’ve been staring into your coffee for like ten minutes.”

  I glanced down at the cup, which I’d forgotten I was even holding. “Yeah. I’m… Yeah. I’m good.” I put the coffee aside. “What’s up?”

  He watched me over his usual oversized travel mug. “You sure you’re good?”

  “I’m fine. I promise. Just… Long night.”

  He watched me for a moment, and he didn’t look convinced.

  “I’m fine,” I insisted. “What about you? Have you heard back from Emerald City yet?”

  “Actually, yeah.” He brightened more than he usually did this early in the day. “Anita approved me! I’m still working on my profile, but it looks like I’ll be joining you.”

  “Nice!” I fist-bumped him. “Any idea when you’ll go live?”

  “Not sure yet, but hopefully soon. I need the money.”

  “Tell Anita. The paperwork sometimes takes a little time, but I know she’ll get a move on if someone asks.”

  Bryce nodded. “I’ll do that.” His smile faded, and he narrowed his eyes. “But seriously, dude. What’s going on? Because I know you, and the way you were zoning out—I’m worried about you.”

  I avoided his gaze. Wasn’t like I could hide anything from him any more than I could from Marco or Luca. Sighing, I rubbed my eyes with my thumb and forefinger. “Honestly? I think I’m getting too close to this guy.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean…” I dropped my hand and sat back. “God, I don’t know. We were just doing the professional thing at first, you know? I showed up, we fucked, and he paid me. But now we’re texting and FaceTiming all the time, and when he’s out of town, I’m counting down until he’s back, and not because I’ve got a hankering for his money. Or even his dick.”

  “So you really like him. As more than a client.”

  Why did that make me feel like shit?

  “I think I do, yeah. But I mean…” I shook my head. “I can’t date him.”

  “Why not?” Bryce shrugged. “Luca made it work with a client.”

  “I know he did, but this guy… I mean, he’s never been with anyone before. He’s never dated anyone. He’d never even kissed anyone until he met me.”

  My ex didn’t look at all fazed. “So?”

  “So…” I threw up my hands. “So, I mean, if he’s into me too… who doesn’t get infatuated with their first?”

  Bryce shook his head. “You’re overthinking it, man. There isn’t some rule that you have to bang a certain number of dudes before you’re allowed to say ‘yep, this is the one I want.’”

  “But there’s a reason most people start dating in like high school. No one’s getting—okay, almost no one is in it for the long haul with the first person they go out with in high school. You have to figure out how relationships work, you know? Stumble through it? Trial and error?”