His hips picked up speed, and the edges of my vision grayed. “Yes. God. Like that,” I moaned.

  "You like it when I fuck you deep?” His whispers were harsh against my ear. His breath hot. "You’re so fucking beautiful. So perfect."

  I was close again. His grasp on my breast tightened, and I knew oblivion was seconds away. He dug his free hand into my hair and tugged until I turned my head, exposing the skin just behind my ear. His favorite part to kiss.

  "God, your pussy is so fucking tight."

  I cried out when he started to pull out of my body. I turned so I could meet his gaze. When only the tip of him remained inside, he stroked back in. Our eyes locked.

  His gaze held me captive, and I didn't dare let go. Through clenched teeth, he whispered, “You fucking own me. Body and soul.”

  Sliding a hand down my belly, all it took was the mere brush of his finger and I flew apart again, clamping down around him.

  Four more pumps and Xander shouted his release, his cock kicking deep inside me.

  Even in my boneless, exhausted state, I knew we’d crossed some kind of invisible threshold. I only wished I knew what it was.

  Xander

  Everything had fundamentally shifted for me. It was one thing to try and protect Imani from me. It was another thing entirely to try and protect myself from Imani.

  Last night, what happened to me, was impossible to run from.

  Arrangement or no arrangement, I knew I wasn't ever going to feel like that again.

  Newsflash, first time you let yourself feel in a long time.

  I rushed home to try and see her only to find the flat empty. When I checked the calendar, I realized she wasn't due home from rehearsal for another two hours.

  Why the hell hadn't I double-checked? I would have just gone to the theater and watched her rehearse and maybe reminded her costar to keep his hands off her.

  I could head to the theater to catch the rest of her rehearsal. Maybe we’d do dinner.

  Smother much?

  I needed to be careful not to overdo this. It had been some while since I had been in an actual relationship, and I had no idea how to do this properly.

  If this was an actual relationship. I was paying her to be here. If I wasn’t, would she choose to be? Trying to guess wasn't going to solve anything.

  I headed toward the bedroom to take a shower and noticed a box with Imani’s things sitting by her door. What the fuck?

  Easy does it. You knew shit would end eventually.

  I knew this feeling. Like someone was slicing me open. Reaching for my guts. Destroying me.

  Maybe she was just prepping to go, trying to make her departure as less fussy and messy as possible.

  Our arrangement had been predicated on temporarily needing to look respectable with her while I dealt with the Alistair thing. And we were nearing that conclusion. I’d always known that she would inevitably go home. It wasn’t like this was some kind of girlfriend experience; she wasn't an escort, and she’d been trying to tell me that from the beginning.

  But last night… Last night a line had been crossed. One I didn't know how to go back from. One I didn't want to go back from.

  I wasn't going to let her go. She was going to have to stay.

  For what reason? You don't actually need her anymore.

  Yes, I did. She was mine. And I would be forever broken if she walked out the door.

  So keep her.

  Two hours later, when she walked through the door, I was waiting on the couch with the lights dimmed low and the television on.

  She gave me a wide smile after she dropped off her bag. "What are you doing in the dark?"

  "It's not dark. Just consider it mood lighting."

  This was going to be hard, but I couldn’t pussy out. I reached for her. "Come here for a sec.”

  With a sexy smile, she toed off her shoes before she sauntered over. When she joined me, I took her hand and pulled her into my lap before kissing her softly. She tasted so sweet. All I wanted to do was revel in the feeling, hold onto her forever, but I knew I couldn't tell her to stay. I had to ask.

  Look at you, learning the right way to do things.

  "What’s with you, Xander? You seem off.”

  I gently tucked her hair behind her ear. "I found your box."

  She frowned and pulled back to meet my gaze before sighing. “Oh.” She cleared her throat. "I’m not leaving today or anything. I know we’ve got a few more days, but I figured I should probably start to depersonalize the flat as much as possible."

  "Is there a reason you're doing it right now?"

  She squirmed on my lap. "Your coup de gras is coming, right? I don't want to have to do some long process of taking stuff out of here. You have a life you want to get back to. You said we’d see each other, and I want to. Do you really want this to be drawn out?"

  "How can you ask me that question after last night?"

  "I know that we said that we'd still see each other, but you realize we did this all backward, right? We moved in together before we even knew each other, and now things are different. We probably want to start fresh, you know?"

  I shook my head. "I don't want to start fresh."

  She laughed. "Really?"

  "What I am saying is that I don't want to start over. I want you to stay. I don't want you to move out.”

  “I'm…“ She paused.

  "What?" Just be brave you wanker. For once. "Look, I don't know what any of this means. Obviously, it would be better if things were simpler, but I don't want you to move out.”

  What I really wanted to do was club her over the head, drag her to my room and chain her to the bed, and then spend the next several hours with my mouth on her pussy until she begged for mercy and agreed to never leave me.

  But that was a scenario for another day. I knew she needed the asking part.

  "Xander. That's a really big step, and this is already complicated enough. I'm not sure that that's a good idea.”

  "It's the only good idea. Are you happy?"

  She ducked her head. I slipped my finger under her chin and lifted it so that our gazes met. "Are you happy with me?"

  She nodded "Yeah. But Xander, we both have all this shit and things going on, and it's very complicated. When I'm here, I believe this. Us."

  "And when you're here I believe it too. So maybe we make it real. At least stay for another few weeks. After the show’s over and things are done with Alistair, we can have a moment to see what we're doing, where this is going."

  She frowned at me then. "You're serious?"

  I nodded. "Yes, I'm being serious."

  "Wow. I didn't expect this. It's more than sex for me, Xander."

  How could she not know? "It's far more than sex for me, too. If you leave here, you're going to strip my soul bare, and I'm not sure I can survive that. There's just still so much we need to learn about each other, and I'd rather do that with you here. A few weeks is all I’m asking for. If you still want to go after that, fair enough."

  Yeah, not fair enough. I would be keeping her in my bed so she wouldn't leave me, but better to let her believe she had a choice in the matter.

  "You really want me to stay?" Her brow furrowed.

  "Isn't that obvious?" I ran a hand over my face. “I've never done this before. Or felt like this. I mean, yeah sure, I was almost engaged once for like a minute, but it wasn't like this. No one ever called me on my shit, made me see myself, made me let them in. I don't want to lose that."

  Her gaze searched mine. "Okay, I'll stay. But only for a few weeks and then we’ll re-evaluate."

  "Yeah. I'm just asking for a few weeks. I just want a little bit more time. After that, if you want to go, I won’t try to stop you. But we have something special here, and I want to explore it."

  She nodded at that. "I suppose this is the part where you kiss me and we shag like rabbits on the couch?"

  I clutched my chest and swore. "My God, I’m an animal, but I’m not a bore. I'm going to drag you to the floor, tear your clothes from you, and then dick you so good you forget your name."

  She giggled. "God, you say the sweetest things."

  I nodded "Yeah, I do, don't I?" And then I slid my lips over hers.

  I’d bought myself some more time. All I had to do was concentrate on showing her just how good it could be.

  I was going to be the perfect boyfriend. And then a couple of weeks would turn into a couple of months, and before she knew it, she wouldn't want to leave. I could do that. She was mine. I just had to convince her. That’s all.

  6

  Imani

  "Bitch, start talking."

  Fe sat back on his couch with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face.

  I sat across from him and sipped my tea. "I know you're ticked off."

  "You don't even know the definition of ticked off. Do you understand that I had to find out about my bestie's relationship with royalty from OK-freaking-Magazine? I mean, without so much as a heads-up from my best girl. What the fuck, Imani?”

  "Fe, I'm so sorry. You have every right to be upset. I should have told you. Or at least warned you about what was going on."

  He sat forward. "Okay, so what exactly is going on? I turn my back for two seconds and fuck off to Ireland for work. Next thing I know, you’re jetting off to Paris and dating the hottest photographer London has ever seen."

  I smirked. "Okay, yeah, he's pretty fit."

  "I am pea-green with envy. I swear you are such a cunt. This calls for alcohol."

  I sighed. Where the hell did I even begin? "Okay, you have to promise me you're not going to freak out."

  His brows snapped down. "When do I freak out?"

  "Excuse me, do you remember the time the dry cleaner ruined your Prada sweater? You went insane. Or that time we were on Oxford Street and you swore up and down you saw Beyoncé in a car. We chased that car for ages, Fe."

  His eyes bugged. "That was different. First of all, that was Queen Bey! And secondly, that was my favorite Prada. I can keep my cool."

  "No judgment?"

  Stretching out his arms, he laughed. "Honey, look at me. Besides, you’ve met my two boyfriends before Adam, right? I think I officially live in a glass house."

  "Good point." I dragged in a breath then exhaled and told him everything, starting from when I called Miriam. Through it all, Fe sat and stared at me, nodding and wincing where appropriate.

  When I finally finished, he sat back. For several long moments, he said nothing. Just stared at me. “So, you mean to tell me he hadn't had an orgasm in years? Is he for real?”

  I winced. That part I hadn't exactly meant to blurt out, but I needed to know how I should handle it from a guy’s perspective. “Yes, he’s for real.”

  “And you have the magic touch?”

  “Apparently.”

  “So you apparently have magic snatch. We need to bottle it and sell it by the millions.”

  “Fe, be serious. It’s hot, but I’m not sure how I’m supposed to help him. I mean what if my magic snatch, as you put it, stops working? Does that mean that we stop working?”

  He laughed as he dodged my poorly aimed pillow. "This shit would only happen to you."

  Laughing so hard I snorted tea up my nose, I threw another pillow at him. "Oh, come on, no other wise words? Nothing to say? I could seriously use some advice here."

  "Well, the first question is, how do you feel?"

  I pursed my lips. "I was afraid you'd ask something like that."

  "Well, it's a valid question. I know your history, so I have to ask how you’re feeling. I know your no-relationship stance."

  "It's not like it's a life choice, Fe. I’ve just been disappointed enough to know better."

  “Well, from the sounds of it, he isn’t Ryan. So maybe that’s not a fair comparison."

  I ducked my head. "I’m terrified, Fe. I don’t believe in that one perfect person for everyone. How many times do I have to tell you, ‘The One’ is a mythical construct we've been taught to believe thanks to fairy tales... and Hallmark. He's not real. And Xander certainly isn’t him. But I feel so good when I’m with him."

  "I get it. You’re a cynic. And in your position, I would be, too. You had a dud right out of the box. And he was rotten and rancid to the core. Xander might actually be that rare breed of reformed bad boy. And maybe you’re reforming him."

  "I promise you I'm not. Look, he's so secretive about his past, about what he’s doing. I'm following someone blindly, and you know that’s killing me."

  "Well, everyone has a few secrets. It's not like you told him all about your sociopathic, whiny bitch of an ex…"

  "Well, it’s none of his business. And not his problem. I'm dealing with Ryan."

  "And by dealing with, you mean going to rehearsals and trying to avoid him?"

  I slumped. "Pretty much."

  "Not going to fly. You have to report him. He's a twat. And I promise you were not the first one he hurt."

  "What do you suggest I do? It's my word against his. And he's already worked an angle with Charles. I swear, I had one move and he beat me to it."

  "You can’t be alone with him, Imani."

  "And I'm not. I’ve managed it so far. But I have no other choice. This is my dream, and I’m not letting him take it away from me. I make sure all conversations are public." At least since the incident in the courtyard I'd done that.

  "That’s not enough. I know I can’t make you, and this has to be your choice. But he's taken too much of your life already. He can’t take the joy out of your rehearsals too."

  "I just want to forget him and move on. I have enough to deal with between the show, and my family, and now Xander. Ryan is the last person I have energy for."

  "I just hate the way it affects you. You’re so closed off to things that can make you happy, and you’re solitary. You need to date and have fun. I just want you to be rid of that arsehole Ryan forever. You need to enjoy Xander Chase. Just do us a favor and tell me he's fantastic in the sack."

  I shook my head. "Fe!"

  “Oh, come on, give a boy a thrill.”

  “Fine, he’s very good at dirty talk.”

  "Mmm, I do love a dirty talker. Lucky girl."

  "Don't you go getting all attached. Sooner or later something will go wrong. Besides, I’m moving out."

  He nodded at me the same way he always did when he wanted to say If you say so, but I don’t believe you.

  "I'm serious, Fe. This isn’t a forever thing."

  "Have you stopped to consider if it's like that for him?"

  "This is Xander Chase, he doesn’t want me long-term. He's not that kind of guy."

  My friend shrugged. "All I'm saying is people can surprise you for the better sometimes. Especially when you have a magic snatch."

  “Fe!”

  He laughed and still dodged my much better-aimed pillow. As I filled him in on home and school, I realized how much I’d missed him. He’d been gone for two weeks. But it felt like a life span had gone by already. “God, I missed you."

  "I missed you too. Now, next time, don’t let me find out something in a gossip rag. Call me."

  "I will. I promise."

  "And for the record, darling, even though I prefer this outcome with the fabulous new man and the fantastic show, the other version would have been good too. You know, where I help you, and for once your stupid pride doesn’t get in the way, and you say thank you."

  I really did love him. "Yeah, I hear you."

  Xander

  It felt different than I thought it would. I twirled around in my chair and stared out my new window overlooking Westminster Abbey. I was exactly where I wanted to be. On the board of the London Artistic Trust and owning enough shares to topple Trident Media. This was everything I’d wanted for years. Now all I had to do was find the proof I needed.

  I cracked my neck, shutting out Lex's words. Revenge is empty, Xan. You’ll have to let it go at some point. Well I wasn’t letting it go. Step two was complete. Now on to step three, which was to isolate and terrify my opponent before completely destroying him.

  "I see you've made yourself comfortable."

  The sound of Alistair's voice from my door made adrenaline shoot through my veins. I turned to face my opponent and kicked my feet up on my desk. "I am comfortable, Alistair, thank you for asking after me."

  "You won’t last six months in this job before you’re bored and off to your next distraction. All I have to do is wait you out."

  I tipped my lips up into a smile. "You're amusing, Alistair. But I promise you I will be here. You see, I'm not easily run off. I told you I would make you pay, and I will."

  Alistair glared at me. "Wasn't fucking my wife enough?"

  I puffed with a humorless laugh. "I promise you it was more a chore than anything else. You’re quite welcome to her." Alistair's face morphed into a red, angry mask, but I kept my hands in my pockets. Just as well, too, because I knew I could kill him easily. And explaining the blood stains in my new office would be difficult.

  The other man did lean forward a little. "How is what's her name? Christie? Oh, now wait, that was your other fiancée. What happened to that one? By all accounts she left you once she realized you were unstable and delusional and in need of psychiatric assistance. I mean, it must’ve been devastating for you. Is that why you're so hell-bent on destroying me? Because I told your bird who you really are? She was bound to find out in the end, Xander."

  I smiled, my teeth locked together. "You're a twat."

  "And you’re a desperate wanker who has always wanted what I had. You were desperate for attention when we were kids and you still are. No one believed you then, and no one will pay you any attention now with your temper tantrum. What is it exactly you think you’ll do here? It's not like you'll get rid of me. I'm a long-standing fixture."

  I narrowed my eyes, fury pouring though my veins. Do not lose control. Do not let him control you. He wouldn't be here for long. I just needed to make sure I had enough shares, then I could implement the last part of my plan. Until that point, I had to keep a level head.