“There’s a science to that, the three stages of falling in love,” Larissa said. “First, there’s lust, which is driven by the levels of testosterone in men and estrogen in women. Then, there’s attraction, which can affect people similarly to certain drugs or alcohol, which is probably why people describe it as a high sometimes. There’s euphoria and the release of several chemicals in the brain, like dopamine, adrenaline, and norepinephrine. It can make falling in love feel like a rush, and it kind of makes you addicted to the person you’re falling for. Adrenaline, in particular, is the reason your cheeks feel warm and flushed, your palms get all sweaty, and your heart races when you meet someone you like for the first time. You will also sometimes not be able to eat or drink because you’re so focused on that person. And the light in the room will seem brighter because your eyes are – well, open wider, for lack of a scientific term at the moment.” Larissa chuckled. “Then, there’s attachment, and that’s where the release of dopamine and norepinephrine is replaced with oxytocin, which is when you may begin to feel more bonded and start making long-term plans together.”

  “I didn’t know any of that,” Neve said. “I mean, I guess I knew some of the basic stuff you said.”

  Harlow could only stare at Larissa. She could listen to her talk science all day, every day, for the rest of her life and die a happy woman. She thought back to the night they had met at the party and how she’d had a whole plate of appetizers that she hadn’t touched; how one day, soon after meeting, they’d gone to coffee, and she hadn’t even taken a sip. Every room Larissa walked into got brighter for her, too. Her palms didn’t get sweaty regularly anymore, but sometimes, they still did. One day, not all that long ago, Larissa had been getting dressed for a school event and needed Harlow to zip up her dress. Harlow’s hands had been sweaty then, and she’d barely gotten the zipper all the way up.

  She was happy for the three women in front of her for finding one another in a world that was made for singles and couples and tended to judge anyone and everyone who was different or who just wanted different for themselves, but she knew she didn’t want two or three or more women. She only wanted Larissa.

  “Well, I guess I was in the lust and attraction phase that night,” Brynn commented with a chuckle.

  “The attachment phase came, like, the next day,” Sydney joked. “She wouldn’t let go of me. I didn’t have to work or anything that day, but she didn’t even want to get out of bed. She just wanted to hold me all day.”

  “It’s true,” Brynn confirmed. “I remember really having to pee, but I was not getting up.”

  “I offered to make breakfast, and she didn’t let me until eleven o’clock or something, and we were both so hungry by then, we ate everything in the fridge, I think. We made love all day after that and had dinner.”

  “We ordered in,” Brynn said. “I wasn’t ready to be without her yet.”

  “We spent every night together for about a week and not many nights apart after that first attempt,” Sydney added.

  “First attempt?” Larissa asked.

  “We thought we might be moving too fast, so we said we’d spend a night at our own places, but we just ended up on the phone until one in the morning because we missed each other too much. We’re very lame.” Sydney laughed.

  “I think it’s sweet,” Larissa noted.

  Harlow turned to her and took in Larissa’s smile. It was her genuine smile, not the forced one she had used earlier.

  “You were falling in love,” Larissa added.

  “We were. We didn’t spend many nights apart after that.”

  “Why would you?” Harlow offered. “You found her.”

  Larissa looked over at her then, and she gave her a look that Harlow wasn’t sure she had ever seen before, and she’d thought she knew most, if not all, of Larissa’s expressions by now. Larissa had her lips turned up just enough to be noticeable, and her eyes were wider than usual. She seemed somewhat tense but also strangely relaxed at the same time, which was an interesting combination that made Harlow take a deep breath.

  CHAPTER 19

  Larissa wasn’t asking the right questions. She had some of the same that she would ask everyone she interviewed, but this was a throuple, and she had forgotten they were talking to a throuple tonight because of her ridiculous conversation with her sister. She hadn’t been able to get Aggie’s words out of her mind since that meeting, and she’d gone home to do last-minute prep for the interview, but she hadn’t. She’d done nothing to make the most of the time she had booked with three women who had given their time to her for a silly book she probably shouldn’t even be working on anyway. School; that was what mattered. She needed to finish school, damn it. This wasn’t important.

  “Larissa?” Harlow said.

  “Yes?”

  “Do you have another question? I feel like I’ve been asking a bunch.”

  Harlow was giving her an in, telling her without making it obvious to the others in the room that she had noticed Larissa not acting like herself.

  “Yes. I’d like to talk about when you met Neve for the first time,” she said. “Can you two tell me what it was like, deciding to meet a third person to bring into the bedroom? I’m particularly interested in the overall process, from that first conversation to actually sending the message to Neve. How long did it take to go from one to the other? What kinds of conversations did you have? Any arguments? What were you thinking? Feeling?”

  “Oh, I’m interested in all this, too,” Neve teased.

  “You already know,” Sydney said with a smile aimed in Neve’s direction.

  “I’m sure I’ll learn something new about it. That’s one of the reasons I wanted to come here,” Neve replied. “To learn more about how we all came to be us.”

  “Can you explain that a little more?” Larissa asked.

  “We’ve talked about it, obviously, but we haven’t talked about everything. I’ve only known them for a year, so we’re still learning things about each other. Hell, they’ve been together for five, and they’re still discovering things about each other. How long have you two been working together? Not the same, I know, but I’m sure you keep learning things about each other. I think that’s cool. It’s one of the reasons long-term relationships last, if you ask me, which no one did.” Neve chuckled a little. “There’s always something more to learn.”

  “Oh, we’ve been friends forever,” Harlow stated. “Larissa and me. I’m helping her with this, but we’ve known each other for about thirteen years now, I think.”

  “And are you still learning things?” Brynn asked. “Please say yes, or our future is pretty boring.” She laughed.

  Larissa looked over at Harlow and replied, “Yes, we’re definitely still learning things about each other. Can we go back to deciding to invite someone into your bed at first?”

  “Yeah,” Brynn said. “It was an awkward dinner.”

  “Go on.”

  “Well, since I’d seen the video, I’d been thinking more about a third person in the relationship, but I didn’t feel like I could say anything.”

  “Why is that?” Harlow asked.

  “Because I was married. We were monogamous. We’d been that way since the beginning of our relationship, and I’d never thought about being anything other than monogamous. I’d never even had an inkling that I’d want another partner at the same time I had Syd. I love Syd. I’ve always loved her. It’s hard to describe because people automatically assume that if you want multiple partners, it must mean your current partner is missing something or not giving you something, but that’s not it; at least, not in my case. Sydney had everything I wanted and needed. It wasn’t something that she was missing. In fact, I couldn’t even fully understand why I was interested in another partner until we met Neve. That night at dinner, Syd asked about sex, which we hadn’t done in a couple of weeks, and the last time we had, it hadn’t been…”

  “Great,” Sydney finished. “I’d planned on asking her to spice things up that night, but not with another person.”

  “No?” Larissa asked.

  “No. I don’t know how we got from never wanting to get out of bed to hardly touching each other. Obviously, work and family stuff were stressful, and we needed to find our way back to one another, but I very much still wanted to touch my wife. It just felt like there was this block, something getting in my way that I couldn’t even understand myself, let alone explain to her. I was going to ask her if she wanted to try a new toy or role-playing or something, but we were eating dinner and barely talking, and I just blurted out that I wanted to have sex that night.”

  “What did you say?” Harlow asked.

  “I said yes because I wanted it, too, but I also asked what made her say it like that because that wasn’t how she usually talked about sex.”

  “I told her I wanted to spice things up, and I was about to suggest one of the things I’d just mentioned, but having a third person in bed with us just entered my brain.”

  “She blurted that out, too,” Brynn said with a laugh. “She said, ‘I think we should have a threesome,’ catching me completely off guard.”

  “Can you think back to what you were feeling when you said that, Sydney?” Larissa asked and made a note.

  “I don’t know that I felt anything specific. I don’t even know that I had a conscious thought about it. I just blurted it out, like she said. I must have been at my wits’ end or something because I missed my wife, but I remember being worried about our relationship and what was happening. She’d been gone for over a month before that. I think she’d just gotten home after being away.”

  “My parents don’t live here, and my mom was really sick. I went to help my dad, who is sort of useless, for a few weeks, and Syd had to work, so she couldn’t go with me. I was only supposed to be there for a week or two, but my mom took a turn, so I had to stay longer, and it was the longest we’d been apart. It was just a lot, and I think we both were feeling it.”

  “And when your wife brought up a threesome at dinner?” Harlow asked.

  “It was a lot for about ten seconds, but then, I told her it was okay with me,” Brynn replied.

  “And we talked about it. We actually talked for the first time in months,” Sydney added. “I told her how much I’d missed her, and that I understood why she had to go to be with her family, but that I had been jealous at the same time because I had to stay home, going to work and taking care of the house and everything else while she’d taken time off to be with her family. She reminded me that her mom was on her deathbed and that it wasn’t a vacation, which I’d known, but my brain was having a hard time accepting that. Anyway, we talked for hours, and we didn’t have sex that night after all because we just kept talking about what we wanted and the important things we’d been dancing around. Then, the next day, we both came home from work and talked more about how to go about doing this.”

  “We downloaded some apps and searched profiles for a woman who might be interested in a one-time threesome. A few hours into it, Syd saw Neve’s picture, and we both just stared at it for a second.”

  “What did you feel?” Larissa asked, pen poised to make a note.

  “My first thought was that she was hot.”

  “Thanks, babe,” Neve said and patted Brynn’s leg.

  “My second thought was that she’s young.”

  “I am younger than them,” Neve added.

  “Then, we read her profile,” Sydney said. “It didn’t say that she was up for anything directly, but it did sort of allude to that.”

  “For the record, I didn’t really mean to suggest that I was up for anything earlier. Mainly, I was okay with a hookup if I liked the person, a short-term thing, or a long-term thing. I had no idea that I’d be interested in a relationship like this either. I thought I’d go to drinks with someone, and if they were interesting, we could go for another date. Or, if I really liked them, we could hook up. I didn’t expect to hear from two women who were married about a three-way.”

  “I can imagine,” Larissa said.

  “And you just messaged her, right?” Harlow asked.

  “We thought about how to message her and wrote at least fifty versions of that first one.”

  “What did you end up going with?” Harlow asked.

  “Hi,” Brynn stated.

  “The classics are classics for a reason,” Neve said with a smile aimed at Brynn.

  “You just said, ‘Hi?’ How did you get from that to, ‘Will you sleep with me and my wife?’” Harlow asked with a laugh and leaned back in her chair.

  Larissa watched how she moved, mesmerized. Harlow always seemed so comfortable in her own skin. Larissa had never been this way, she supposed, but Harlow made her feel like she could be one day. Just being around Harlow made her feel better about who she was and more at ease with herself.

  “We waited to see if she’d respond first,” Sydney shared and let go of Neve’s hand to wrap her arm over the back of Neve’s chair instead. “And she did. Right away. We had just made our profile on the app, but having no idea how to do it properly, we’d made a profile as a married couple. I think she understood what was going on from the beginning because of that.”

  “I was confused at first,” Neve admitted. “I’d never had a profile like that reach out to me. But I messaged them, ‘Hi back,’ out of curiosity.”

  “We replied, and the two of us just sat there, passing the phone back and forth, messaging with this stranger about a possible threesome. We’d had probably too much wine, too, so we laughed a bunch, and it was just fun,” Brynn said.

  “We made love that night, and two days later, we met Neve,” Sydney revealed.

  “She was twenty-four at the time. Syd was twenty-nine. I was thirty-four, and at first, I thought the ten years between Neve and me might make me self-conscious. She’s gorgeous, obviously, and younger than me. I almost let it get to me.”

  “But you didn’t?” Larissa checked.

  “No. Syd helped, though. She had to remind me that I was beautiful. Then, Neve made me feel that way that night, too, and I was able to get out of my own head.”

  “Can we talk about that a little more?” Larissa asked.

  They continued their discussion about the specifics of how they all got together, with Larissa dialing into questions about the stress of bringing a third person into their existing relationship. Neve shared that there had been moments when she hadn’t been sure how she would fit in, so they’d all had to discuss it. Then, when they’d started conversations about her moving into their two-bedroom home, they had had to figure out how that would all work logistically. The women explained that there were four relationships between them, so giving time and space for all of them wasn’t always easy.

  The biggest issue was kids. Neve wanted them. Brynn hadn’t planned on ever having kids. Sydney had been in the ‘she could be convinced either way’ camp. They hadn’t landed anywhere yet, but Neve loved both of them and had decided that if kids weren’t in her future, she could be okay with that. It had been a very interesting and eye-opening conversation for Larissa, revealing more layers to love than she’d initially considered, which, for a scientist, was a good thing, but it also meant that she risked going down a rabbit hole if she wasn’t careful.

  When the three women left, Larissa sat back down in her chair, feeling completely exhausted and unable to process everything that had just happened and what she’d learned all at once. Her brain was taking her in so many different directions, but there was one that she focused on the most.

  “I can’t believe I did that,” she said more to herself than to Harlow.

  “Did what?” Harlow asked.

  “I forgot we were talking to them tonight. I thought it was a couple. I prepped for a couple. I’m always prepared, and I wasn’t tonight.”

  “I think it still went okay.”

  “Yeah, because of you. You asked good questions.”

  “Well, I learned from the best,” Harlow replied with a smile. “And you asked good ones, too, Larissa. I think you got what you needed.”

  “But I wanted to dive more into the initial feelings and stressors.”

  “You can always email them. I’m sure they’d be willing to talk more. I don’t get the impression that they came here because of the hundred bucks you offered them. It seemed to me that they just wanted to talk about their story and maybe learn something themselves.”

  “I’m normally so organized…” She shook her head. “I feel like I just wasted their time.”

  “You didn’t. They had fun, Lou. Didn’t you see them? It’s like you helped them open up to one another in a way they haven’t before. I think that’s cool. I also think that when you listen to the recording and check your notes, you’ll find that you have something good you can work with. Besides, I’ve never read a book on love that featured a throuple in it. I mean, I don’t read books on love often, if at all, but you get my point.”

  “I guess so,” she said. “I think I’m going to hang out here, if that’s okay.”

  “In the room?”

  “No, I only reserved it for the hour, so just here in the space. I can go out there to the lobby and type up my notes for a while. I feel like I need to do that now, or I won’t at home.”

  “Why?”

  “Because you’ll probably want to have dinner or something or otherwise want to distract me.”

  She smiled at Harlow.

  “I’ll leave you alone. But if you want to stay here, that’s fine. I can hang out.”

  “No, you go, Harlow. I’ll get a car home.”

  “I don’t mind hanging out. There’s food and free coffee. Plus, the overhead music out there is good tonight.”

  “I’ll be late, I think,” Larissa told her.

  “Okay.” Harlow nodded and stood. “Got it. I’ll head to your place. Will you promise me that you’ll eat something real either here or at least when you get home?”

  “Yes, I’ll eat something at some point tonight,” she said with a laugh.