Bea frowned. “And why would you contact him?”

  “Well...” Gabby stopped, eyeing her aunt. “Did Mom tell you about this?”

  “She mentioned it,” Bea admitted. “And I agree with her on this one, Gabby. Contacting him is a bad idea.”

  “Seriously?” Gabby sighed. “Auntie, I really thought you’d have a different perspective. I understand why my mom is bitter about him, but you, too? What’s the story here that you two aren’t telling me?”

  “There isn’t a story,” Bea said. “I just don’t think he’s the wonderful father figure you’re looking for.”

  “I’m not looking for a wonderful father figure,” Gabby countered. “I just want to meet my dad. And I want him to meet my babies. People can change, and it’s been thirty years. You knew him. What was he like?”

  “He was a jerk,” Bea said. “He made your mother miserable and broke her heart.”

  “Okay, but personality-wise. She loved him once. There must have been some good,” Gabby pressed.

  “He was a guy’s guy,” Bea said. “He...he didn’t care enough about either of you to come back. He isn’t worth your heart, Gabby. This is what I’m worried about—you getting hurt when he lets you down.”

  “I’m thirty,” Gabby reminded her. “I’m not a child anymore.”

  “But your boys? He’s not a nice man, dear.”

  That felt like a low blow. Of course, she thought about her sons constantly, and she stared at her aunt, not answering.

  Bea took a bite of pie. “I can’t stop you, but I’d advise against contacting him.”

  “I already did,” Gabby said quietly.

  Bea stopped chewing, her gaze locked on Gabby. “And?”

  “I haven’t heard back,” she said. “At least I think I’ve contacted the right man. He has the right name, and he’s working in California for a marketing firm. The details seem like they’d add up to the right guy.”

  Bea swallowed. “And he hasn’t messaged you back?”

  “It’s been a few days,” Gabby said. “And you might be right. This might be my father, and he might not care enough to even reply. I don’t know... Being a mom now, I just see things differently, I guess. I know my sons will need a father in their life. It makes me realize I might need one, too.”

  “You took care of a father for your boys,” Bea said shortly. “And your mother took care of you by giving you a good godfather.”

  “No matter how wonderful Seth is, my boys will want to meet Craig,” Gabby said. “And he will very likely let them down, but it’ll be their right to meet the man who fathered them.”

  Bea reached for her mug of tea and took a swig. “You might feel differently about this when they’re older, dear girl. They’re infants now, and all of this is so far away that it’s cushioned in noble wishes for their future. But when you’re facing the complicated emotions of your precious boys meeting an older, possibly more bitter Craig, your instincts might be exactly like your mother’s.”

  “I don’t blame her,” Gabby said. “I know why Mom didn’t want him back in our lives, and I’m not upset. I had a wonderful childhood. I was loved and cared for, and I didn’t lack for anything. But knowing that my dad didn’t want me...that messed me up a bit.”

  “Not all men are worth being messed up over,” Bea said.

  Gabby didn’t answer that. Her aunt was very likely right. And if she had found her father, he hadn’t answered, and she’d promised herself that she wouldn’t email him again. She wouldn’t beg. She’d given him the opportunity to connect with her, and if he refused it, then he was the one who’d have to live with that.

  Except she’d live with it, too—with his rejection.

  “Why didn’t he want to know me?” Gabby asked quietly.

  Bea shook her head. “He just never came back, dear. He never checked up on your mom, either. Focus on what you do have—your mom, your godfather, your boys, your...husband.”

  Gabby noticed her aunt’s hesitation there.

  “What?” Gabby asked.

  “Was your choice to marry a friend instead of a lover...was that because of your father?” Bea asked quietly.

  “Maybe,” Gabby said. “I don’t know. How much can you blame an absentee father for? I was always attracted to losers, and I’ve often wondered if that was because of some DNA quirk that drew me to them, or if it was just my subconscious way of chasing after men just like my father... So the other men I wasted my time on are probably my father’s fault. But choosing Seth was a conscious effort to get out of that rut. He’s different. He’s better.”

  “He’s a good man,” Bea agreed. “Even if you did get married for all the wrong reasons.”

  “Just different reasons,” Gabby said with a low laugh. “It seems to be working for us, so...”

  And there she was—still keeping up those appearances. She didn’t want to admit that this might have been a mistake. She had hoped they’d be able to sort it all out.

  When her visit was through, Gabby packed the babies back into the car and waved goodbye to her aunt. It felt good to come into town. Maybe she’d married Seth for pragmatic reasons, but without him, she’d be slipping deeply into debt just to feed them, and these boys wouldn’t be seeing a doctor. This morning, she’d called and made an appointment for their first checkup here in Eagle’s Rest in the week before Christmas.

  Sometimes marriage was practical. Sometimes it was for the children. Was that so wrong?

  Gabby’s phone pinged as started the car. That would be an incoming email. As her car warmed up, she fished the phone out of her purse for a quick look.

  She pulled up the email, and she stopped short when she saw the name: Hank A. Rogers. Her father. He’d replied. She sucked in a ragged breath and touched the email alert, pulling up the full message.

  Dear Gabby,

  I was on vacation last week, and I only got your email today, so I’m sorry about the delay in replying. I’m the man you’re looking for—I was married to Carol for three years about thirty years ago. Maybe it was four years by the time the divorce was finalized. But I think there has been a big misunderstanding. Maybe it’s better we talk on the phone. This is my number. Feel free to call me.

  Gabby’s heart hammered in her chest. A misunderstanding? If he was the man she was looking for...it sounded like there was more to this than her mother or Bea were telling her. She’d tried getting answers from them, to no avail. If she wanted his side of it, her dad was willing to talk.

  She dropped her phone into her purse and backed out of her parking spot. She’d wait until she got home, give herself a chance to feel ready for this conversation. She’d waited thirty years for this chance, and she needed to be able to remember his words once she hung up.

  Because for the first time in her life, she was going to speak to her father, and the only question that she wanted answered right now was: Why didn’t you love me?

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  SETH HAD BEEN thinking about that kiss from the Christmas party all damned day. It had been a little more than he’d expected. He’d figured it would feel as staged as it was...except it hadn’t felt that way at all. Her lips had been soft and yielding, and while he’d intended to give her something a smidgen longer than a peck, he hadn’t pulled back...and neither had she.

  Seth put the truck into gear and pulled away from the barn. He was tired and hungry, and it was time to go home. But he wasn’t going to be able to reheat some leftovers and sit in the silent living room, beating himself up. He was going home to her.

  What had happened last night? Because after some time to think today, he knew the kiss had gotten away from him. Was he that lonely? Was that what it was—kissing a woman again after so long? Feeling connected in the physical way that he’d been missing so much? Because having Gabby and the baby in his arms had felt so right. He’d been protective of her, but he’d felt something deeper, too, something he wasn’t comfortable with. It was probably best to keep that emotional door tightly shut.

  The gravel road was slick with snow. They did plow the roads when there was a good snowfall, but a lot of the accumulation got packed down into something close to ice after a while. He slowed as he came around a corner, then sped up again.

  So maybe he’d been a little bit wrong in that kiss; he should have kept it short and sweet and chaste instead of giving in like that. He should apologize properly for that. Because all day long, he’d been remembering the feeling of her in his arms, her lips against his, the smell of her faint perfume, the glimmer in her eyes when he looked down at her...

  He was doing it again. He shoved the memory back. The problem was, while he could accept that he had crossed a line, he couldn’t quite regret it, either.

  What they needed was a chance to get out together without the babies. Most married couples had date nights and that sort of thing, because it refreshed the friendship. No matter the kind of marriage, that foundation of friendship mattered! So if he wanted to solidify things with Gabby again, maybe getting out together would be the answer. Not a date, just...an outing.

  It had been probably ten years since they’d gone riding together. The last time had been before he’d met Bonnie, and he and Gabby had gotten caught in a rainstorm. They were drenched when they got back, and they’d wrapped up in towels and heated up a can of mushroom soup to share between them. He could still remember the way her wet hair had looked smoothed away from her face, a fluffy white towel over her shoulders. She’d hogged the crackers for her soup, but he hadn’t minded. It had just been something to tease her about.

  Maybe Gabby would be game to go riding again. It might get them back into their comfort zone, away from the pressure of their new legal status of husband and wife.

  His house came into view. The curtains were open and the inside glowed golden. He could see the Christmas tree in the front window, lights twinkling. He’d gotten used to coming back to a dark house, and he was almost scared to get used to domestic comfort again...a woman waiting for him.

  He parked the truck in his regular place in the carport. He was looking forward to seeing her. And the babies, too. It felt good to pack around the little tykes, look down into earnest little faces... He liked it.

  Seth headed around to the side door and kicked the snow off his boots before letting himself in. The house smelled good—was that beef stew?

  Gabby was standing by the counter as he peeled off his outerwear, her cell phone to her ear, and she looked over as he came in, but she didn’t return his smile.

  “...you said there’d been some sort of misunderstanding,” Gabby was saying into the phone. She paused, listening.

  “Wait...” She rubbed a hand over her forehead. “But my mom was pregnant when you left—” She nodded, listening for a little longer. “Oh...” She shut her eyes. “Yeah, that’s...understandable.”

  Her father? Seth’s heart sped up, and he tried to catch her eye, but she turned away from him. Right—she might want some privacy for this. Seth watched her for a moment, then headed to the living room, where the babies were in their bouncy chairs facing the Christmas tree. Beau and Aiden were asleep, their faces turned toward each other, but Andy was wide-awake, those round brown eyes blinking up at the tree.

  “Hey, buddy,” Seth said softly, squatting down next to him. “How’re you doing?”

  Andy waved a little fist, and Seth scooped him up and settled him against his chest. Andy smelled of baby powder and milk. Seth smiled down at the little guy.

  “That tree is something, huh? Well, I’ve got news for you, kid. Santa’s coming, and that’s going to be really exciting. Just wait until you get old enough to wrap your mind around that.”

  He looked back in the kitchen again, where Gabby stood with her back to him.

  “Yeah, thanks,” she was saying. “I appreciate you telling me this... No, no...it’s better to know the truth, right...? Yeah... You, too. Merry Christmas.”

  Gabby hung up the call, but didn’t turn. She stood frozen in the center of the kitchen.

  “Gabs?” he said softly.

  She turned then. He hadn’t known what he’d expected to see on her face, but she looked calm. Too calm. He came into the kitchen.

  “That sounded like it was your dad,” he said.

  “It was... I mean...” She swallowed. “It was the man I was looking for, but he’s not my father.”

  “What?” Seth couldn’t help the incredulity in his tone. “It sounded like—”

  “Oh, he’s the right guy,” she said, the calm starting to crack. “He’s just not my biological father.”

  “How does he figure?” Seth asked.

  “Hank and Mom were having a lot of marriage problems, and they hadn’t been...intimate...in about six months. He said maybe longer. So when Mom told him she was three months pregnant with me, Hank was absolutely positive he wasn’t my father. That’s why he left.”

  Andy wriggled in Seth’s arms, and he readjusted the baby, his mind spinning. Someone was lying, Carol or Hank. And he’d never heard a good thing about Hank, so he knew who he suspected.

  “Do you believe that?” he asked after a moment. “Because I’ve known of guys who claimed kids weren’t theirs in order to avoid the child support. It’s cowardly and cheap, but it happens.”

  “I think he’s telling the truth,” she said.

  “Why?”

  “Because he felt awful. He has a wife and three kids now. He said he had no idea I was raised believing he was my dad. He said it felt cruel to him, and that was why he wanted to talk to me over the phone, to make sure I was okay.”

  “And you think your mother lied to you for the last thirty years?” he asked. “Did he say who your father was?”

  She shook her head. “Hank said he knows, but it wasn’t fair to my mom to tell me that. He said she should be able to tell me about that in her own words.”

  That did seem rather noble of the guy, Seth had to agree—grudgingly.

  “To top it off, he told me that my mom is a good person,” Gabby went on. “He said that he wasn’t a good husband back then, and that their divorce gave him the kick in the pants he needed to pull his life together and revaluate a lot of things, namely, how he treated the women in his life.”

  “So he’s grown and changed?” Seth muttered.

  “Apparently.” Gabby heaved a sigh. “I did believe him while he was saying it, but Seth, I find it really hard to wrap my mind around my mother cheating on someone. She’s not the type.”

  “Was there anything that didn’t quite add up when you were growing up?” Seth asked.

  “Um...” She shrugged weakly. “I don’t know. Isn’t that just life? Lots of things don’t add up.”

  “Like what?” he asked.

  “I mean, lots of things don’t make a lot of sense on the surface,” she said. “You need more details to understand.”

  Seth frowned. “Not really. The truth normally sounds like the truth. It’s pretty rare when something sounds like a lie and it turns out to be true. In my experience, at least.”

  Andy started to whimper, so Seth eased him into his mother’s arms. Gabby smoothed a hand over Andy’s downy hair, then looked up at Seth.

  “Mom always said I shouldn’t look for my father because he didn’t care about us,” Gabby said. “And she stood by that. I used to wonder why she wouldn’t let me at least see the jerk he was, but she said it wasn’t worth it.”

  Seth met her gaze. “But you believed your mom, obviously. It’s understandable.”

  “When you love someone, you believe their version of things. That’s loyalty,” she said, then shook her head. “Maybe I wanted to believe Mom’s version. I don’t know. It was easier to resent him than to believe my own mother might be lying to me.”

  “If she was...” Seth scrubbed a hand through his hair. “He could be the liar. Some people are awfully good at it.”

  “Don’t I know it,” Gabby said with a sigh. “Most of my boyfriends have been accomplished liars.”

  Seth didn’t know how to answer that. She always had been attracted to the wrong kind of guy, and he’d hated that. She deserved so much better than she’d been willing to accept.

  “What am I supposed to do, demand a DNA test?” she asked bitterly. “Mom was the one who loved me and raised me. She was the one who was there for me. She’s my family, not the man who might be my biological dad, but was never in my life.”

  “I agree,” he said. “Maybe she’ll have some insights. I know you’re being facetious about the DNA test, but maybe you should get one, just to put your own mind at ease.”

  “He isn’t supposed to matter!” Gabby said, tears welling in her eyes. “I told myself he didn’t—everyone told me he didn’t! He wasn’t a part of our family. He dumped us. Whether he acknowledges me or not isn’t supposed to affect my balance! But he does matter, after all. Maybe he did all along.”

  “What do you need right now?” Seth asked quietly.

  “I guess I need to go talk to my mom,” she said.

  “Is she home?”

  “She should be soon.” Gabby pressed a kiss on the top of Andy’s head, but her chin trembled.

  “You want to leave the triplets with me and go talk to her?” Seth asked.

  “You’d be okay?” she asked hesitantly.

  “Gabs, I’ll be fine,” he said. “I can do diapers, I can do bottles and I can hold them. I might not be able to do anything else while I’m at it, but I can cover the necessities.”

  “That would be nice, Seth. You’re very sweet.”

  “I’m your husband,” he said, lowering his voice. “This is part of the job description.”

  Gabby smiled wanly. “You really did get yourself the short end of the stick on this, didn’t you?”