CHRIS

  (as he eats)

  So Domergue, I suppose this blizzard counts as a stroke of luck as far as you’re concerned?

  DOMERGUE

  You don’t hear me complaining do ya’?

  CHRIS

  No I sure don’t.

  (to Oswaldo)

  How ’bout you Oswaldo?

  OSWALDO

  How about me what?

  CHRIS

  Look, considerin’ all the things I done for money, I ain’t one to judge. But don’t you feel just the least little bit bad ’bout hangin’ a woman?

  OSWALDO

  Till they invent a TRIGGER that women can’t pull, if you’re a hang man, you’re going to hang women.

  CHRIS

  Well hell Ozzy, I guess I ain’t never looked at it like that before.

  JOHN RUTH

  When it comes to some of them mean bastards out there, it’s the only thing does the job. You really only need to hang mean bastards. But mean bastards, you need to hang.

  OSWALDO

  But as I was telling Mr.Ruth and Miss.Domergue earlier, I don’t like the term HANG-MAN. I’m an Executioner. Assuming Miss.Domergue has a pain in the neck in her future, it won’t be me that hangs her. It will be the judge, the jury, and by extension, the entire town of Red Rock that sentences her to hang.

  (beat)

  I just execute the sentence.

  CHRIS

  Well I know how ya’ feel Ozzy, I don’t like a lot of the terms John Ruth throws at me. But short of shootin’ ’em, I don’t know a hellva’ lot I can do about it.

  JOHN RUTH

  You try shootin’ me Mannix, for your sake it better be in the back.

  CHRIS

  Oh don’t worry John, it will be.

  (to Maj.Warren)

  How you doin’, black Major?

  Major Warren moves his eyes in Chris Mannix’s direction, then moves them back down to his stew bowl.

  MAJ.WARREN

  I ain’t in the mood, Mannix. Leave me be from your horseshit.

  CHRIS

  John Ruth says you gotta’ Lincoln letter?

  Maj.Warren puts down his spoon and turns in his seat to face Chris.

  MAJ.WARREN

  I tole’ you jackass to hee-haw somewhere else and I meant it.

  Chris turns to John Ruth across the table.

  CHRIS

  (to John Ruth)

  That’s right John, you said that didn’t ya’?

  JOHN RUTH

  Yes I did.

  CHRIS

  (to Maj.Warren)

  So.… you gotta’ letter from Abraham Lincoln?

  MAJ.WARREN

  Yes.

  CHRIS

  Thee Abraham Lincoln?

  MAJ.WARREN

  Yes.

  CHRIS

  Abraham Lincoln? The President of the United States…?

  MAJ.WARREN

  Yes.

  CHRIS

  … of America?

  MAJ.WARREN

  Yes.

  CHRIS

  Wrote you a letter, personally?

  MAJ.WARREN

  Yes.

  CHRIS

  Personally? As in; “Dear Maj.Warren”?

  MAJ.WARREN

  No. Personally as in; “Dear Marquis”.

  CHRIS

  “Dear Marquis”?

  Abraham Lincoln-the-President-of-the-United-States-of-America?

  (said as one word)

  MAJ.WARREN

  Yes.

  CHRIS

  May I see it?

  MAJ.WARREN

  No you may not.

  CHRIS

  But the way John tells it, you weren’t just some random nigger soldier picked from a pile of letters.

  (beat)

  Way John tells it, y’all hada’ correspondence.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Yes.

  CHRIS

  Way John tells it, y’all’s practically pen pals?

  MAJ.WARREN

  Yes.

  CHRIS

  And a pen pal’s..… practically a friend.

  Maj.Warren doesn’t say anything. He just turns away from Chris and eats his stew.

  Chris turns around to face John Ruth sitting across from him.

  CHRIS

  (to John Ruth)

  So you think a nigger drummed outta’ the Calvary with a yellow stripe down his back.… was practically friends with The President of The United States of America?

  Now that John Ruth has watched that episode played out in front of him. And frankly, now that he thinks about it, the letter’s authenticity does seem unlikely.

  CHRIS

  John Ruth, I hate to be the one to break it to ya’, but nobody in Minnie’s Haberdashery has ever corresponded with Abraham Lincoln…… Least of all, THAT NIGGER THERE!

  John Ruth looks across at Maj.Warren.

  Maj.Warren looks back at him.

  JOHN RUTH

  Was that all horseshit?

  MAJ.WARREN

  Course it was.

  BEAT.

  Then.…

  DOMERGUE BURSTS OUT LAUGHING!

  John Ruth looks over at her, picks up his stew bowl and THROWS THE STEW IN HER FACE!

  Then he turns and faces Maj.Warren sitting across from him.

  JOHN RUTH

  So I guess it’s true what they say about you people. You can’t believe a fuckin’ word that comes outta’ your mouths.

  MAJ.WARREN

  What’s wrong? I hurt your feelings?

  JOHN RUTH

  As-a-matter-of-fact, you did.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Now I know I’m the only black son-of-a-bitch you ever met, so I’m gonna’ cut your ass some slack. But you ain’t got no idea what a black man starin’ down America looks like.

  (small beat)

  The only time black folks are safe, is when white folks are disarmed.

  Pulling the phony letter out of his inside jacket pocket.

  MAJ.WARREN

  This letter had the desired effect of disarming white folks.

  JOHN RUTH

  Call it what you want, I call it a dirty trick.

  He puts the letter back inside his coat.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Wanna’ know why I’d lie about something like that, white man?

  (beat)

  Got me on that stagecoach, didn’t it.

  “Yes it did”, thinks John Ruth, and the thought makes him blink.

  Maj.Warren suddenly stands up from the table, taking his stew bowl and spoon with him. As Warren walks away, Chris says to the table;

  CHRIS

  Well I’ll tell you like the lord tole’ John, a letter from Abraham Lincoln wouldn’t have that kinda’ effect on me.

  I might let a whore piss on it.

  General Sanford Smithers sits alone in his grey uniform, bathed in crackling and cackling FIRE LIGHT.

  Maj.Warren walks over to the stew pot, pours some food into an empty bowl. Picks up a big wooden spoon. Walks over to where Gen.Smithers sits. And places the stew bowl and spoon next to him on a little table. Gen.Smithers looks to the stew bowl, then up at the black fella’ in Cavalry pants that stands over him.

  Across the room Chris Mannix yells at Maj.Warren;

  CHRIS

  Warren goddamit, you leave that old man alone!

  Maj.Warren yells across the room right back;

  MAJ.WARREN

  Stand down you son-of-a-bitch, I shared a battlefield with this man.

  That makes Chris stand down.

  Maj.Warren looks down at the old man in the cozy chair.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Or would you deny me that too?

  GEN.SMITHERS

  I suppose you were there.

  Maj.Warren points at the empty cozy chair across from The Old General.

  MAJ.WARREN

  May I join you?

  After a clock tick or two, without looking up at him, the old man says;

  GEN.SMITHERS

  Yes you may.

  Holding his stew bowl and big wooden spoon, Maj.Warren sits in the chair opposite Gen.Smithers. Maj.Warren is coming correct to the old Southern General, at least as far as the old Southern General is concerned. Correct due to age, due to rank, and due to race.

  The two men sit in silence, as Maj.Warren eats a spoonful of stew.

  GEN.SMITHERS

  What’s in the stew?

  MAJ.WARREN

  I don’t know.

  (yelling to Bob)

  Hey Bob! What’s in the stew?

  Bob answers.

  BOB

  Beaver, buck, and horse.

  The Old Man snorts.

  GEN.SMITHERS

  There ain’t no buck in that bowl.

  The Old Man picks up the spoon and the bowl next to him, and shoves some in his mouth. Then, with some brown stew staining his grey beard, Smithers says;

  GEN.SMITHERS

  A lotta’ horse. Lotta’ possum be my guess.

  The two men sit in their chairs by the fire, eating out of their bowls.

  Bob finishes at the picnic table, and moseys over to the piano and starts to hesitantly play the Christmas tune “Silent Night”.

  The two former Civil War officers continue to eat stew with big wooden spoons.

  MAJ.WARREN

  How’s life been since the war?

  GEN.SMITHERS

  Got both of my legs. Got both of my arms. Can’t complain.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Got a woman?

  GEN.SMITHERS

  Fever took her beginning this winter.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Me, I never went in for a woman regular.

  GEN.SMITHERS

  In my day no one asked you if you went in for it. You just did it.

  MAJ.WARREN

  What was her name?

  GEN.SMITHERS

  Betsy.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Georgia girl?

  GEN.SMITHERS

  Augusta. Atlanta boy, Augusta girl. I used to raise Kentucky horses. Her paw’ owned the breedership I purchased most of my ponies from. I made a good deal on her. Used that stake I got from him. Purchased a few peach orchards. Set myself up pretty good. Did a hellva’ lot better than my no good brothers, that’s for damn sure. All in all.… can’t complain. Betsy took fat after our boy. But I never minded that. She was a nice woman, I never minded anything she did.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Yeah, your son came up here a coupla’ years ago. He spoke highly of his mama too.

  A SHARP STING goes through Sandy Smithers’ body as he shifts his focus on the black man.

  Just as Bob fucks up “Silent Night”, and starts again.

  GEN.SMITHERS

  You knew my boy?

  MAJ.WARREN

  Did I know ’em?

  (small chuckle)

  Yeah.… I knew ’em.

  The old man snorts.

  GEN.SMITHERS

  You didn’t know ’em.

  Maj.Warren places his stew bowl aside, and says;

  MAJ.WARREN

  Fine, suit yourself.

  Maj.Warren stands and the old man grabs his wrist.

  GEN.SMITHERS

  Didja’ know my boy?

  Maj.Warren looks down at the frantic old man, and says calmly;

  MAJ.WARREN

  I know the day he died, do you?

  The old man is hit in the heart. He croaks out a;

  GEN.SMITHERS

  No.

  Looking down at the feeble old man in the chair;

  MAJ.WARREN

  Wanna’ know what day that was?

  The old man clutches the black man’s sleeve tighter.

  GEN.SMITHERS

  Yes.

  The black man leans down slightly closer to the old man, and says;

  MAJ.WARREN

  The day he met me.

  The white old man falls back in his chair.

  As Bob continues to play “Silent Night” more confidently, the black bounty hunter removes one of his pistols from his gun belt, and places it on the little table next to Sandy Smithers’ chair.

  The old man looks down at it.

  Then, with one pistol left in his gun belt, Maj.Warren walks over to the bar in Philadelphia, leans against it sideways, and continues talking to the old man in Georgia.

  MAJ.WARREN

  He came up here to do a little nigger head huntin’. By then the reward was five thousand and bragging rights. But back then to battle hard rebs, five thousand just to cut off a nigger’s head, that was good money. So the Johnny’s climbed this mountain, lookin’ for fortune. But there was no fortune to be found. All they found was me. All them fella’s came up here, when they found themselves at the mercy of a nigger’s gun, sang a different tune. “Let’s just forget it. I go my way, you go yours”, that’s your boy Chester talkin’.

  The old man by the fire SCREAMS AT HIM from across the room;

  GEN.SMITHERS

  You a damn lie!

  MAJ.WARREN

  “If you just let me go home to my family, I’ll never set foot in Wyoming again”, that’s what they all said. Some of them ole’ boys had some real sad stories to tell too.

  (beat)

  Beggin’ for his life, your boy told me his WHOLE LIFE STORY. And you was in that story, General. And when I knew me I had the boy of The Bloody Nigger Killer of Baton Rouge.… I knew me I was gonna’ have some fun.

  The other people, most of which are still around the picnic table, know exactly what Maj.Warren is doing. He’s placed a loaded pistol by the old man, and now is trying to provoke Gen.Smithers to pick it up, and point it at the black man. At which point the black man can legally shoot him dead in self defense.

  Chris Mannix is on his feet YELLING at the black man and the old white man;

  CHRIS

  (to Maj.Warren)

  You shut your lyin’ nigger lips up!

  (to Gen.Smithers)

  Gen.Smithers, don’t listen to ’em, he don’t know your boy! He just heard tell why you here is all! He’s just peckin’ at ya’ for a fight!

  MAJ.WARREN

  (to Gen.Smithers)

  It was cold the day I killed your boy. And I don’t mean snowy mountain in Wyoming cold… Colder than that. And on that cold day, with your boy at the business end of my gun barrel….… I made him STRIP. Right down to his bare ass. Then I told him to start walkin’.

  FLASH TO

  EXT—SNOWY VISTA IN THE MOUNTAINS—DAY

  We see what Maj.Warren describes. But we see the BIG WIDE 70MM SUPER CINEMASCOPE VERSION.

  A magnificient white Wyoming winter vista, and inside of it, Maj.Warren on his horse Lash, pointing a rifle at A NAKED WHITE MAN walking ahead of him in the snow.

  MAJ.WARREN VOICE (OS)

  I walked his naked ass for two hours.…

  Then we see the naked White Man collapse in the snow.

  Maj.Warren holds up his horse, and watches the cold man.

  MAJ.WARREN VOICE (OS)

  ….’fore the cold collapsed him.

  BACK TO MINNIE’S

  CU GEN.SMITHERS

  GEN.SMITHERS

  You never knew my boy!

  Chris joins in;

  CHRIS

  No he didn’t! He’s just a sneaky nigger tryin’ to getcha to go for that gun! This black devil’s a bounty hunter, that’s how bounty hunters do!

  Maj.Warren just continues with his story. His concentration unaffected by the other voices in the room.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Then he started in begging again. But this time he wasn’t begging to go home. He knew he’d never see his home again. And he wasn’t beggin’ for his life no more. That was long gone and he knew it. He was just beggin’ for a BLANKET. Now don’t judge your son too harshly. You ain’t never been as cold as your boy was that day. You’d be surprised what a man that cold, would-do-for-a-blanket. Wanna’ know what your boy did?

  The old man watches the storyteller, eyes bulging out of his head.

  MAJ.WARREN

  (pause)

  I took my big black pecker outta’ my pants. And I made him crawl in the snow on all fours over to it. Then I grabbed a hand full of that black hair on the back of his head..…

  The old man leans forward in his chair.

  MAJ.WARREN

  Then I stuck that big black johnson right down his goddamn throat. And that johnson was fulla’ blood. So it was warm. You bet your sweet ass it was warm. And Chester Charles Smithers sucked on that warm black dingus as long as he could.

  FLASH ON

  EXT—SNOWY VISTA—DAY

  We see what Maj.Warren describes in BIG WIDE 70MM SUPER CINEMASCOPE.

  A WHITE WINTER WYOMING VISTA, and inside of that vista, is a Naked White Man on his knees sucking the dick of a Heavily Clothed Black Man in the snow.

  BACK TO MINNIE’S

  CU GEN.SMITHERS

  the old man is in knots. It was worse than his imagination ever dared.

  He knows the truth when he hears it. This is how Chester ended his life.

  CU MAJ.WARREN

  the black Major has the white General right where he wants him. He flashes an alligator grin, and says;

  MAJ.WARREN

  Starting to see pictures, ain’t ya’? Your son. Black dude’s dingus in his mouth. Him shiverin’—him cryin’—me laughin’—him not understandin’. But you understand, doncha’ Sandy?