I kissed the top of her head. “I can’t pretend with you, Clarissa. It’s always been you for me.”

  She nodded, and then her lips met mine.

  We fell backward on the couch, and she buried her fingers in my hair as she opened her legs.

  I sighed and grabbed a condom from the pocket of my discarded pants. I wanted her to choose to love me.

  She helped roll it on me, and we kissed again.

  She was the sexiest woman I’d ever met, and she directed me to join her.

  As I pushed into her core, it was like being in heaven itself.

  She clutched me and held me tight as I drove into her.

  Soon, she moaned and found her release. I joined her and then collapsed, entirely spent.

  I moved so I could hold her without crushing her, and she rested against me. My heart was still racing, and her eyes were closed.

  Without warning, she whispered, “I love you too.”

  I stilled as I wasn’t sure I'd heard her correctly. I hoped I had. She was everything I'd ever wanted as a partner, but I was afraid I'd heard what I wanted to hear as some sort of wish fulfillment.

  She yawned, so I didn't ask her to repeat what she'd said. She was peaceful, so I decided to find out later. I said I’d wait for her, and now I had hope.

  34

  Clarissa

  I woke up in bliss and saw that Elon was still resting. I kissed his cheek and decided to gather our clothes and put them in the bedroom.

  My heart was raw. Hurting Elon was the opposite of what I wanted to do. He was nothing but wonderful.

  Years ago, I’d known he would take care of me and even marry me if I told him about Sam. I’d held my tongue as I would never force his hand, but until today, I hadn’t really believed he’d waited all this time for me.

  He’d told me so earlier, but when I hadn't wanted to go to dinner, it was like I could see the young man he’d been.

  I left our clothes on the side of the bed but then realized that clothes for me hung inside the closet.

  I should have guessed he would do that. I took a shower, and then my phone rang when I was dressing.

  Elon came into the bedroom as I was finishing up the call. I told Sam, “Have a great dinner.”

  Elon went into the en suite bathroom and splashed water on his face. “What’s going on?” he asked.

  I needed to do something for Elon to make up for being horrible. I met his gaze. “Sam’s going out to dinner with Aurora and your parents.”

  He laughed. “He’ll be spoiled.”

  Roxanne and Parvis had always been great, and I thought they were the perfect example of good parents. My heart shifted. “Take your shower," I told Elon. "I’ll make us dinner.”

  “You don’t have to.”

  “I got this,” I said and headed out of the bedroom.

  I headed into the kitchen and found chicken, rice, and some vegetables.

  A simple dinner, made with my own two hands, would be perfect. I chopped the veggies and seasoned the chicken. The rice was simmering when Elon, dressed in simple cargo shorts and a white T-shirt, came into the kitchen. He kissed my cheek. “This looks good.”

  I lifted my chin. It was time to admit I'd been wrong to hurt him. I tensed. “I… owed you…”

  The words refused to be said. I kept imagining he’d want to live happily ever after with me, but I wasn’t there.

  I was a mess.

  He said, “You don’t owe me anything.”

  If I started explaining, he’d never understand. I turned the chicken in the pan, and it looked done. “Well, I'm hungry, and you offered to go out, but we’ve not had a dinner on our own.”

  He grabbed the plates. “We have dinner every night.”

  I served the rice and chicken. “Cooked by your chef and with Sam at the table. This time, it’s just you and me.”

  He found the silverware and a bottle of wine. He opened it. “That sounds great.”

  My face heated. “You were out of parsley, but I hope you like what I made.”

  The benign conversation wasn’t what we needed, but my fears stood in my way of talking about anything more serious.

  He said, “You can order anything—“

  I lifted one eyebrow, and he lowered his head. “Never mind.”

  We sat down to eat, and silence clung to the air.

  “This tastes great,” he finally said.

  None of this was his fault. I relaxed and asked, “Really?”

  He finished chewing. “I never lie to you.”

  The brightness in his face set my heart aflame. I’d never hurt him again. “It’s one of your best qualities.”

  I might be able to keep the vow I’d made to myself as he was so wonderful. Being with him made me better.

  35

  Elon

  After we'd made love, she’d not clarified her feelings at all. In fact, the word owed still made me flinch. It was like she couldn’t stand to tell me that she loved me.

  We washed our dishes, and I wasn’t sure how to fix everything.

  I needed to stop pushing.

  A text came through on my phone, and I read Arman’s messages about the children and how much fun they’d had.

  “Sam’s asleep," I told Clarissa. "I’ll bring him up.”

  “I’ll get his room ready,” she said.

  I took solace in the fact that we worked as one unit now. The elevator ride down gave me a minute to list some of my blessings—Clarissa was here, and she smiled and joked with me.

  I just needed to give her the reins.

  My brother stood outside on the sidewalk, and I waved at Maddie in the limo as I retrieved the sleeping Sam from him.

  Sam was another blessing. I held him over my shoulder as he was heavy. “Thanks, Arman.”

  He nodded. “I hope you and Clarissa worked out your issues.”

  My brother and Maddie had been fated to be together from the beginning. Arman wouldn't understand at all. “It’s a work in progress.”

  “We’ll talk soon,” he said.

  Unlike Arman, who'd always led a charmed life with whatever he wanted coming easily to him, the rest of us had to figure it out. I took the elevator back upstairs with Sam.

  As I made it to the door, Clarissa opened it and asked, “What happened?”

  We slipped inside, and I walked Sam to the bedroom. “Both Sam and Aurora fell asleep in the limo. Running too much in the park, I guess.”

  She’d laid out his pajamas on the bed, and we got to work taking off his shoes and changing him. “I… I’m happy he’s made friends with Aurora," she said. "I just wish I knew how to find the right therapist.”

  “Me too. Hopefully, his friendship with Aurora will mean he’ll open up to others at school.”

  We finished getting him into his nightclothes and tucked him in the bed.

  I ruffled his hair, stood, and waited till she kissed him. “The school therapist sent her recommendations. Did you look them over?”

  We headed out of Sam's bedroom. I was determined to keep my hands to myself unless she initiated things. I would never admit to feelings that would hurt her. She closed the door behind us. “I started to, but guilt overtook me. You can pick someone for us to try.”

  I rocked on my feet. Deciding by myself felt like the wrong thing to do, though the recommended therapists were also on the list I sometimes gave my patients. She waved me to the dining room, so we went there.

  “Are you sure?" I asked. "You’ve been parenting alone for a long time, and I hate to step on your toes.”

  She picked up the glasses of wine we’d hardly touched, gave one to me, and then we clinked glasses. “You’re the best there is, lover boy.”

  My heart lifted. “I’ll make the appointment in the morning, and then we’ll work on getting him there—together.”

  She pointed to the balcony. I followed her outside, wishing that one day she would love me. Then everything would be perfect, but for now, I needed to stay the course—or I’d blow everything.

  36

  Elon

  After my shower in the morning, I grabbed a pair of shorts and a muscle shirt and headed to breakfast. Clarissa had slept beside me but snuck out of my bedroom at dawn. I’d meant to follow, but I fell back asleep.

  The first thing I did was email a colleague to get Sam in to see a therapist. Once that was done, I was ready to go. As I walked to the bright dining nook of the apartment, Clarissa and Sam were sitting together. She hung up her phone and said to Sam, “I told Maddie it would be great.”

  I slid into a seat beside Sam and poured myself a cup of tea. “What did I miss?”

  Clarissa folded her hands in front of her. “Arman and Maddie want to take Sam to the children’s art museum with Aurora.”

  I gulped the hot liquid and grabbed a fresh croissant from the table to have something in my belly. I’d work out later. “Sounds fun. I made the appointment we discussed for next week.”

  “What appointment?” Sam asked.

  Clarissa said, “For all of us just to talk about what’s happening.”

  He shook his head. “I don’t need a therapist. I’ll start talking at school.”

  The three of us finished a small but simple breakfast that had been made by my parents' personal chef and delivered to us.

  I finished a second cup of tea to get my fill of caffeine, and then Clarissa pushed back her chair. “Are you ready to go?”

  I stood and dropped the napkin onto the empty plate. “Absolutely.”

  The three of us grabbed our shoes, put them on, and headed out. As we made it to the elevator, Sam said, “Elon, I’m happy you’re my dad.”

  My heart thumped, and I patted Sam on the back. “Me too. You’re the best son I could ever ask for.”

  Sam kept his lips closed as we passed building security, but once we got to the park, he lifted his chin and said, “And you’re who I dreamed would show up at the door and sweep us away.”

  Clarissa choked back a sob.

  I went down to one knee and hugged him. He hugged me back and then asked, “Take care of Mom? I promise I’ll figure myself out.”

  This time I cried and didn’t care who saw. Having Sam and Clarissa as my family was everything I'd ever wanted. I met his gaze. “I want us all to be one family.”

  I stood, and he held hands with both Clarissa and me. Life had amazing moments, and we were having one of them.

  For better or worse, we were a family.

  A few minutes later, we were at my brother’s high-rise. Arman and Aurora were out front waiting for us, and I waved at my brother as Sam hugged Clarissa. “Mom, have fun,” he said.

  We watched him walk toward them as Clarissa called, “We will. You too.”

  I clasped my hands behind my back and asked, “Fun?”

  She bumped into my shoulder. “If you want to leave the apartment with me…”

  My heart pumped faster. “Wait, you want to go out? With me?”

  She bounced on her toes and faced me. “Only if you want.”

  I’d wanted nothing more than to let people see she was with me. I offered my hand. “I’d… let’s go home and change out of the shorts.”

  The morning was nice, and we had a date. In the daytime, there were lots of things to do in the city. We headed back upstairs as I thought about what we should do. I headed to my room, and she stopped me. “What should I wear?”

  She was the prettiest woman I’d ever seen. “A dress.”

  I had to make the date fantastic.

  She stilled. “I never wear them.”

  I cocked my head. “Why?”

  “Because I hate putting on makeup and trying to feel good enough to wear something other people look great in naturally.”

  I rubbed the back of my head. “You’re beautiful as you are. How do you think you got the job as a princess?”

  She snickered and opened the closet. “Because I was persistent.”

  “You’re with me now, and I’ve never been attracted to ugly.” It was hard to imagine her as anything but perfect.

  She pivoted toward me and pressed her hand over her heart. “Okay, I’ll put on a dress.”

  I picked up my phone to make plans for our date. “But no makeup.”

  She laughed. “That might be too much.”

  “I like looking at you as you are.”

  I texted my secretary for restaurant recommendations and got confirmation minutes later that reservations had been made not only at a restaurant but for the other activities I had in mind.

  She came out of the bathroom in a knee-length blue dress that showed off her figure. “Is this okay?”

  My heart thumped. She was a knockout. “Wow.”

  Her cheeks turned pink. “So you like?”

  I tucked away my phone, which was beeping with texts from family, and focused on Clarissa. “Absolutely. When was the last time you wore a dress?”

  “For other than work?”

  “Yes.”

  We headed out of the apartment. “Prom.”

  Right. I’d been a sulking teenager. I had no idea what she'd seen in me. I pressed my hand on her back. “You were gorgeous as my nondate but the only woman I wanted to be with.”

  We stepped into the elevator. “Well, my mother had a different opinion. She told me showing my knees was like being naked, and I wasn’t ever going to have an easy life.”

  I’d been blind. Her prom dress had been a blue, beaded dress that shone on the dance floor. I’d not been able to get her alone for long, but watching her be happy had made me happy.

  We walked out of the building. “Are you serious?”

  “Except for my work gowns that covered everything down to my ankles, I’ve not worn a dress on my own since then.”

  I liked to imagine I could change her perception of her looks. “And your mom is wrong. Your knees are cute and touchable.”

  “Stop,” she said as the limo stopped in front of the building. “Doesn’t matter. You know now… what’s this?”

  The driver got out of the limo and held the door open for us, and we slipped in. “We’re taking the limo to the Met before they open," I said. "Afterward, we'll eat at Eleven Madison Park.”

  She settled in her seat. “Would your brother Gerard approve of the menu?”

  I laughed. “He recommended the restaurant. You remembered his love for food?”

  She let out a giggle. “I read his blog all the time. It sounds just like him.”

  Most of the world had no idea Gerard had been a foodie before it was even a popular thing. “You know he has a blog?”

  She stared at me like I was crazy. “He’s been writing it since we were kids.”

  The Metropolitan Museum of Art wasn’t open yet, so we had an easy time parking. We filed out of the limo.

  “I’m still in shock at how big Adrien got,” Clarissa said as we walked to the entrance.

  I missed my baby brother sometimes. “He’s tall.”

  I showed my ID to security, and we were let in.

  “I’m sure Adrien is a heartbreaker in college, much like you were,” she said.

  The museum curators let us through to the empty halls that were still closed to other guests. I stared at her. “You were the only one then and now.”

  She let out a sigh. “Keep talking like that, lover boy, and we’ll have an amazing day.”

  “That’s all I want.”

  Now that we were out together on a date, I hoped it was enough to show her that she could trust me with her heart. I would never let her down.

  37

  Clarissa

  We plopped on the floor and enjoyed the immersive Monet exhibit. Lights reflected digital projections of his famous paintings from top to bottom. It seemed like we were part of the painting being shown. I’d only seen the exhibit before in a movie, and here I was in a living painting, sitting in the arms of the hottest guy on the planet. His muscular arms around me made me feel… safe.

  The dream was real for the moment. I sighed. “I can’t believe how beautiful this is.”

  He whispered in my ear, “Nothing compares to you.”

  All the right words. If it was possible to come home forever, then home would be here—with Elon. I rested my head on his shoulder as the display changed. “I always thought the paintings were gorgeous. but now that it feels like we’re inside the whole thing, I’m overwhelmed, to be honest.”

  I normally wasn't surrounded by magnificence. For a moment, as I enjoyed the immersive experience, I imagined living with Elon forever as we raised Sam together like we’d been doing since I came to live with him. It wasn’t just Sam Elon had saved, it had been me too. Life was a dream these days.

  “Let’s not analyze and just enjoy the show,” Elon said.

  It seemed like my breathing was becoming one with his as we shared the same space.

  “You’re not worried you’ll ruin your pants by sitting on the floor?” I asked.

  He patted my knee and squeezed me closer. “I’ll buy more, and besides I live my life in shorts as much as possible. Do you think I’m too fancy?”

  My lips curved upward. “Do you want me to lie or be honest?”

  He quirked an eyebrow. “Honesty is good.”

  I laughed and cupped his face. “You’re wonderful… amazing… but yeah, you have some fanciness about you. And you do use your money to try to win people over sometimes, including me and Sam.”

  He pressed his hand to his heart. “I’m offended.”

  A chuckle escaped my throat. This was nice. I watched the show. “Do you remember when we were eighteen, and we had a fight about prom? I planned to go in a car with my friends as you and I—“

  “Weren’t publicly dating," he finished. "I remember.”

  Good. He needed to understand, so I continued, “Then an hour later, I was still angry with you, and yet I had to bring soup to your room.”

  He tilted his head. “I thought it was a peace offering.”

  “No, I was the servants' daughter, and I had to bring it to you.” In the end, there had been a huge gap between us. I sat up and turned in his arms to meet his gaze. “And you just assumed I was there to apologize, just as you bought me a tiara… so yes, you’re fancy, like this light show, and it’s okay.”