They think my little stomach to225 the war

  And your great love to me restrains you thus:

  Sweet, rouse yourself; and the weak wanton227 Cupid

  Shall from your neck unloose his amorous fold228,

  And, like a dew-drop from the lion’s mane,

  Be shook to airy air.

  ACHILLES Shall Ajax fight with Hector?

  PATROCLUS Ay, and perhaps receive much honour by him232.

  ACHILLES I see my reputation is at stake,

  My fame234 is shrewdly gored.

  PATROCLUS O, then, beware:

  Those wounds heal ill236 that men do give themselves.

  Omission to do what is necessary

  Seals a commission to a blank of danger238,

  And danger, like an ague239, subtly taints

  Even then when we sit idly in the sun.

  ACHILLES Go call Thersites hither, sweet Patroclus:

  I’ll send the fool to Ajax and desire him

  T’invite the Trojan lords after the combat

  To see us here unarmed. I have a woman’s longing244,

  An appetite that I am sick withal245,

  To see great Hector in his weeds246 of peace,

  Enter Thersites

  To talk with him and to behold his visage,

  Even to my full of view248.— A labour saved!

  Sees Thersites

  THERSITES A wonder!

  ACHILLES What?

  THERSITES Ajax goes up and down the field, asking for himself251.

  ACHILLES How so?

  THERSITES He must fight singly tomorrow with Hector, and is

  so prophetically proud254 of an heroical cudgelling that he

  raves in saying nothing255.

  ACHILLES How can that be?

  THERSITES Why, he stalks up and down like a peacock257, a stride

  and a stand: ruminates like an hostess258 that hath no arithmetic

  but her brain to set down her reckoning259: bites his lip with a

  politic regard260, as who should say ’There were wit in this head,

  an ’twould out261’; and so there is, but it lies as coldly in him as

  fire in a flint, which will not show without knocking262. The

  man’s undone263 for ever; for if Hector break not his neck

  i’th’combat, he’ll break’t himself in vainglory. He knows264 not

  me: I said, ‘Good morrow, Ajax’; and he replies, ‘Thanks,

  Agamemnon.’ What think you of this man that takes me for

  the general? He’s grown a very land-fish267, language-less, a

  monster. A plague of opinion268! A man may wear it on both

  sides, like a leather jerkin269.

  ACHILLES Thou must be my ambassador to him, Thersites.

  THERSITES Who, I? Why, he’ll answer nobody. He professes not271

  answering: speaking is for beggars, he wears his tongue in’s

  arms272. I will put on273 his presence; let Patroclus make his

  demands274 to me, you shall see the pageant of Ajax.

  ACHILLES To him275, Patroclus; tell him I humbly desire the

  valiant Ajax to invite the most valorous Hector to come

  unarmed to my tent, and to procure safe conduct for his

  person of the magnanimous and most illustrious six-or-

  seven-times-honoured captain-general of the Grecian army,

  Agamemnon, et cetera. Do this.

  PATROCLUS Jove bless great Ajax!

  THERSITES Hum!282

  PATROCLUS I come from the worthy Achilles—

  THERSITES Ha!

  PATROCLUS Who most humbly desires you to invite Hector to

  his tent—

  THERSITES Hum!

  PATROCLUS And to procure safe conduct from Agamemnon.

  THERSITES Agamemnon?

  PATROCLUS Ay, my lord.

  THERSITES Ha?

  PATROCLUS What say you to’t?

  THERSITES God buy you293, with all my heart.

  PATROCLUS Your answer, sir.

  THERSITES If tomorrow be a fair day, by eleven o’clock it will

  go one way or other: howsoever296, he shall pay for me ere he

  has297 me.

  PATROCLUS Your answer, sir.

  THERSITES Fare you well, with all my heart.

  ACHILLES Why, but he is not in this tune300, is he?

  THERSITES No, but he’s out o’tune thus. What music will be in

  him when Hector has knocked out his brains, I know not,

  but I am sure none, unless the fiddler303 Apollo get his sinews to

  make catlings304 on.

  ACHILLES Come, thou shalt bear a letter to him straight.

  THERSITES Let me carry another to his horse; for that’s the

  more capable307 creature.

  ACHILLES My mind is troubled, like a fountain stirred308,

  And I myself see not the bottom of it.

  [Exeunt Achilles and Patroclus]

  THERSITES Would the fountain of your mind were clear again,

  that I might water an ass at it! I had rather be a tick in a

  sheep than such a valiant312 ignorance.

  [Exit]

  [Act 4 Scene 1]

  running scene 9

  Location: Troy

  Enter at one door Aeneas with a torch, at another Paris, Deiphobus, Antenor, Diomedes the Grecian, with torches

  PARIS See, ho! Who is that there?

  DEIPHOBUS It is the lord Aeneas.

  AENEAS Is the prince there in person?

  Had I so good occasion4 to lie long

  As you, Prince Paris, nothing but heavenly business5

  Should rob my bed-mate of my company.

  DIOMEDES That’s my mind7 too. Good morrow, Lord Aeneas.

  PARIS A valiant Greek, Aeneas: take his hand.

  Witness the process of your speech9, within

  You told how Diomed, in a whole week by days10,

  Did haunt11 you in the field.

  AENEAS Health to you, valiant sir,

  During all question of13 the gentle truce,

  But when I meet you armed, as black defiance

  As heart can think15 or courage execute.

  DIOMEDES The one and other16 Diomed embraces.

  Our bloods17 are now in calm, and, so long, health!

  But when contention18 and occasion meets,

  By Jove, I’ll play the hunter for thy life

  With all my force, pursuit and policy20.

  AENEAS And thou shalt hunt a lion that will fly

  With his face backward22. In humane gentleness,

  Welcome to Troy. Now, by Anchises23’ life,

  Welcome indeed! By Venus24’ hand I swear,

  No man alive can love in such a sort

  The thing he means to kill more excellently25.

  DIOMEDES We sympathize27. Jove, let Aeneas live —

  If to my sword his fate be not the glory28 —

  A thousand complete courses of the sun29!

  But, in mine30 emulous honour, let him die

  With every joint a wound, and that tomorrow!

  AENEAS We know32 each other well.

  DIOMEDES We do, and long to know each other worse33.

  PARIS This is the most despiteful’st gentle34 greeting,

  The noblest hateful love, that e’er I heard of.

  What business, lord, so early?

  AENEAS I was sent for to the king; but why, I know not.

  PARIS His purpose meets you: it was to bring this Greek

  To Calchas’ house, and there to render39 him,

  For the enfreed Antenor, the fair Cressid.

  Let’s have your company, or, if you please,

  Haste there before us.—

  I constantly42 do think —

  Aside to

  Or rather, call my thought43 a certain knowledge —

  Aeneas

  My brother Troilus lodges there tonight:

  Rouse him and give him note45 of our approach,

  With the whole quality whereof46. I fear

  We shall be much unwelcome.

  AENEAS That I assure you:

  Troilus had rather Troy were borne to Greece

  Than Cressid borne from Troy.

  PARIS There is no help:

  The bitter disposition52 of the time

  Will have it so. On, lord, we’ll follow you.

  AENEAS Good morrow54, all.

  Exit Aeneas

  PARIS And tell me, noble Diomed, faith, tell me true,

  Even in the soul of sound good-fellowship,

  Who, in your thoughts, merits fair Helen most,

  Myself or Menelaus?

  DIOMEDES Both alike:

  He60 merits well to have her that doth seek her,

  Not making any scruple of61 her soilure,

  With such a hell of pain and world of charge62.

  And you as well to keep her that defend her,

  Not palating64 the taste of her dishonour,

  With such a costly loss of wealth and friends.

  He, like a puling66 cuckold, would drink up

  The lees and dregs67 of a flat tamèd piece:

  You, like a lecher, out of whorish loins68

  Are pleased to breed out69 your inheritors.

  Both merits poised70, each weighs no less nor more,

  But he as he71, the heavier for a whore.

  PARIS You are too bitter to your countrywoman.

  DIOMEDES She’s bitter to her country. Hear me, Paris:

  For every false drop in her bawdy veins

  A Grecian’s life hath sunk75, for every scruple

  Of her contaminated carrion76 weight,

  A Trojan hath been slain. Since she could speak,

  She hath not given so many good words breath78

  As for her Greeks and Trojans suffered death.

  PARIS Fair Diomed, you do as chapmen80 do,

  Dispraise81 the thing that you desire to buy:

  But we in silence hold this virtue well82:

  We’ll not commend83 what we intend to sell.

  Here lies our way84.

  Exeunt

  [Act 4 Scene 2]

  running scene 10

  Enter Troilus and Cressida

  TROILUS Dear, trouble not yourself: the morn is cold.

  CRESSIDA Then, sweet my lord, I’ll call mine uncle down;

  He shall unbolt the gates.

  TROILUS Trouble him not.

  To bed, to bed: sleep kill5 those pretty eyes,

  And give as soft attachment6 to thy senses

  As7 infants empty of all thought!

  CRESSIDA Good morrow, then.

  TROILUS I prithee now, to bed.

  CRESSIDA Are you aweary of me?

  TROILUS O Cressida! But11 that the busy day,

  Waked by the lark, hath roused the ribald12 crows,

  And dreaming night will hide our joys no longer,

  I would not from14 thee.

  CRESSIDA Night hath been too brief.

  TROILUS Beshrew16 the witch! With venomous wights she stays

  As hideously as hell, but flies the grasps17 of love

  With wings more momentary-swift18 than thought.

  You will catch cold and curse me.

  CRESSIDA Prithee, tarry20: you men will never tarry.

  O foolish Cressid! I might have still held off21,

  And then you would have tarried. Hark, there’s one up.

  PANDARUS What’s23 all the doors open here?

  Within

  TROILUS It is your uncle.

  Enter Pandarus

  CRESSIDA A pestilence25 on him! Now will he be mocking:

  I shall have such a life26!

  PANDARUS How now, how now? How go27 maidenheads?

  Hear, you maid! Where’s my cousin Cressid?28

  CRESSIDA Go hang yourself, you naughty29 mocking uncle!

  You bring me to do – – – –30 and then you flout me too.

  PANDARUS To do31 what? To do what? Let her say what: what

  have I brought you to do?

  CRESSIDA Come, come, beshrew your heart! You’ll ne’er be good,

  Nor suffer others34.

  PANDARUS Ha, ha! Alas, poor wretch! Ah, poor chipochia35! Hast

  not slept tonight? Would he not — a naughty man — let it

  sleep? A bugbear37 take him!

  One knocks

  CRESSIDA Did not I tell you? Would he were knocked i’th’head38!

  Who’s that at door? Good uncle, go and see.—

  My lord, come you again into my chamber.

  You smile and mock me, as if I meant naughtily41.

  TROILUS Ha, ha!

  CRESSIDA Come, you are deceived, I think of no such thing43.

  How earnestly they knock! Pray you, come in:

  Knock

  I would not for half Troy have you seen here.

  Exeunt [Troilus and Cressida]

  PANDARUS Who’s there? What’s the matter? Will you beat

  down the door? How now, what’s the matter?

  [Enter Aeneas]

  AENEAS Good morrow, lord, good morrow.

  PANDARUS Who’s there? My lord Aeneas? By my troth,

  I knew50 you not: what news with you so early?

  AENEAS Is not Prince Troilus here?

  PANDARUS Here? What should he do here?

  AENEAS Come, he is here, my lord, do not deny him:

  It doth import54 him much to speak with me.

  PANDARUS Is he here, say you? ’Tis more than I know, I’ll be

  sworn. For my own part, I came in late. What should he do

  here?

  AENEAS Who58, nay then! Come, come, you’ll do him wrong

  ere you’re ware59: you’ll be so true to him, to be false to him.

  Do not you know of him60, but yet go fetch him hither. Go.

  Enter Troilus

  TROILUS How now? What’s the matter?

  AENEAS My lord, I scarce have leisure to salute you,

  My matter is so rash63: there is at hand

  Paris your brother, and Deiphobus,

  The Grecian Diomed, and our Antenor

  Delivered to us, and for him forthwith,

  Ere the first sacrifice67, within this hour,

  We must give up to Diomedes’ hand

  The lady Cressida.

  TROILUS Is it concluded70 so?

  AENEAS By Priam and the general state71 of Troy:

  They are at hand and ready to effect it.

  TROILUS How my achievements73 mock me!

  I will go meet them. And, my lord Aeneas,

  We met by chance; you did not find me here.

  AENEAS Good, good, my lord, the secrets of nature

  Have not more gift in taciturnity77.

  Exeunt [Troilus and Aeneas]

  Enter Cressida

  PANDARUS Is’t possible? No sooner got but lost? The devil take

  Antenor! The young prince will go mad. A plague upon

  Antenor! I would they had broke’s80 neck!

  CRESSIDA How now? What’s the matter? Who was here?

  PANDARUS Ah, ha!

  CRESSIDA Why sigh you so profoundly? Where’s my lord?

  Gone! Tell me, sweet uncle, what’s the matter?

  PANDARUS Would I were as deep under the earth as I am above!

  CRESSIDA O the gods! What’s the matter?

  PANDARUS Prithee, get thee in: would thou hadst ne’er been

  born! I knew thou wouldst be his death. O, poor gentleman!

  A plague upon Antenor!

  CRESSIDA Good uncle, I beseech you, on my knees I beseech

  you, what’s the matter?

  PANDARUS Thou must be gone, wench, thou must be gone;

  thou art changed93 for Antenor. Thou must to thy father, and

  be gone from Troilus: ’twill be his death, ’twill be his bane94: he

  cannot bear it.

  CRESSIDA O you immortal gods! I will not go.

  PANDARUS Thou must.

  CRESSIDA I will not, uncle. I have forgot my father:

  I know no touch99 of consanguinity:

  No kin, no love, no blood, no soul so near me

  As the sweet Troilus. O you gods divine!

  Make Cressid’s name the very crown of falsehood,

  If ever she leave Troilus! Time, force103 and death,

  Do to this body what extremity you can;

  But the strong base105 and building of my love

  Is as the very centre of the earth,

  Drawing all things to it106. I will go in and weep.

  PANDARUS Do, do.

  CRESSIDA Tear my bright hair and scratch my praisèd cheeks,

  Crack my clear voice with sobs and break my heart

  With sounding111 Troilus. I will not go from Troy.

  Exeunt

  [Act 4 Scene 3]

  running scene 11

  Enter Paris, Troilus, Aeneas, Deiphobus, Antenor and Diomedes

  PARIS It is great morning1, and the hour prefixed

  Of her delivery to this valiant Greek

  Comes fast upon. Good my brother Troilus,

  Tell you the lady what she is to do,

  And haste her to the purpose5.

  TROILUS Walk into her house:

  I’ll bring her to the Grecian presently7;

  And to his hand when I deliver her,

  Think it an altar, and thy brother Troilus

  A priest there off’ring to it his heart.

  PARIS I know what ’tis to love,

  And would12, as I shall pity, I could help!

  Please you walk in, my lords.

  Exeunt

  [Act 4 Scene 4]

  running scene 12

  Enter Pandarus and Cressida

  PANDARUS Be moderate, be moderate.

  CRESSIDA Why tell you me of moderation?

  The grief is fine3, full, perfect, that I taste,

  And no less in a sense as strong

  As that which causeth it. How can I moderate it?

  If I could temporize6 with my affection,

  Or brew7 it to a weak and colder palate,

  The like allayment8 could I give my grief.

  My love admits no qualifying dross9.

  Enter Troilus

  No more10 my grief, in such a precious loss.

  PANDARUS Here, here, here he comes, a sweet duck11.

  CRESSIDA O Troilus! Troilus!

  Embraces him

  PANDARUS What a pair of spectacles is here13! Let me embrace

  too. ‘O heart’ as the goodly saying is,

  ‘O heart, heavy heart,

  Why sigh’st thou without breaking?’

  Where he17 answers again,

  ‘Because thou canst not ease thy smart18