Quartz.

  There was Quartz in snow, directing the whole shebang. He looked like a mini dictator, and Bleu was working like one of Santa’s elves, feverishly sculpting. Good Lord.

  He pulled out his phone and snapped pictures furiously. That was the neatest thing he’d ever seen. The whole thing should be on TV or something, but he would immortalize it.

  As he got closer, he frowned. Bleu was kneeling in the snow, and he didn’t have gloves on at all.

  Had they been out here all morning? Seriously?

  “Hey, there! See our army? Isn’t it amazing?” Quartz looked on top of the world.

  “It’s amazing.” He clicked out of the skis. “I mean really. I took so many pictures. Has anyone else seen it?”

  “I don’t think so. When we’re done, I’ll get Uncle Ford and Daddy.”

  He moved closer to Quartz. “I think Bleu is about to freeze, kiddo. He can’t see what color his hands are, but we can.”

  “Oh. Should I go get them now? Will you stay with him?”

  “I will. Thanks, Quartz. Bleu is very happy, I can tell, but he needs a rest.” He didn’t touch, because Geoff had warned him Quartz had to be the one to initiate that, but he left no doubt he was proud and pleased.

  “Thank you!” Quartz ran off, and he went right to Bleu.

  “Honey, you have to stop. Your poor hands.”

  “Huh?” God, some things never changed.

  “You took your gloves off. If you lose a finger or two to frostbite, no one will forgive you.” He took those cold as hell fingers in his.

  “I was….” Bleu’s teeth began to chatter. “When did it get cold?”

  He laughed. “It’s been cold. Come on, let’s get you inside.”

  He led Bleu toward the kitchen. There would be food and cocoa and warmth there. “Where’s Floyd?” he asked, looking around for the dog.

  “Pouting somewhere. I wouldn’t come with him when he nudged.”

  “Floyd’s in the kitchen, Mr. Bleu. I brought them to see!”

  “Thanks, Quartz. I’m gonna warm up, okay?” Bleu shook like an Aspen leaf.

  “Oh my God. Ford, look at this.” Stoney was just hooting.

  “It’s fabulous. Get him in the house, Shields.”

  “I’m on it.” He hustled Bleu into the house. “Geoff?”

  “He’s in the pantry.” Tiny turned to look at them. “Here. There’s a fire in the family room. I’ll bring some towels for his hands. We have to warm them up slower than the rest of him. Get his boots off, and I’ll bring dry socks.”

  “I’m okay….” Bleu held on to him, refusing to let him go.

  “I got you, babe. I swear.” He took Bleu right into the family room to plop him in a platform rocker style chair. He could shove the whole thing across to the fire where he could put Bleu’s feet up.

  “Socks,” Tiny said, handing him a pair of the biggest, fuzziest slipper-socks he’d ever seen. They had cats on them.

  “What kind of cat do you have, Tiny?”

  “A big fat Persian.”

  “Is he a Texan?”

  Tiny blushed, but that grin said volumes. “Well, no, but I have recently gotten into one of those.”

  He cackled, and Bleu frowned. “What did I miss?”

  “I’ll tell you, babe.” Before he put the socks on Bleu, he took off the soaked boots, socks, and jeans. “Long johns. I approve.”

  “Thanks.”

  Geoff appeared with pajama pants and a blanket. “Here we go. Be back with hot choccie in a flash. You want hot towels for the hands?”

  “Please.” Tiny had said warm. He figured those two would work it out. “Stand up a minute, babe?” Where the hell was Dan?

  “Okay….” Bleu stood for him without question.

  He slipped the new jammie pants on Bleu’s feet one by one. “Okay, have a sit.” He pushed on the socks once Bleu sat, then covered Bleu with the blanket. The shirt would have to go too—

  “Here. A sweatshirt,” Tiny said. “Warm towels.”

  “I feel so silly,” Bleu said.

  “You were having such a good time,” Ryan murmured.

  “We were.”

  God, those poor baby swollen hands. Ryan wrapped the big towel around them, and Bleu hissed. “I know. It will feel better soon. Do you have that arthritis lotion in your cabin?”

  “Yeah. Always. You know.”

  He did. The autoimmune disease that ruined Bleu’s eyes affected his joints too.

  “Cool. We’ll get that on you when you thaw out.” Physical stress was Bleu’s kryptonite. He could get sick in a heartbeat when he was overtaxed.

  “Was Quartz pleased?” Those bright eyes moved constantly, searching for God knew what. Ryan remembered that, how Bleu could exhaust himself without even knowing it.

  “He was like a general leading a charge. Hell, they’re still out there looking, so I bet he’s showing them every detail.” He rubbed the towel gently over Bleu’s arms. “It’s amazing, babe.”

  “Thanks. It was fun. Did you have a good day?”

  “I skied out a long way. It was good. I decided I needed time to myself, not a crowded slope.” Selfish? Yeah, probably, but half the time he never made it up the lift.

  “You’ll need to have a long bubble bath and a whiskey tonight.”

  “I will.” He stopped himself from asking Bleu to join him. The man was married, for God’s sake.

  “Good. I remember that. You and your bubble baths.” The expression on Bleu’s face didn’t hide a thing.

  “Yeah? I still love them.” He looked at his hands, which were moving on Bleu’s skin now with no towel.

  Geoff saved him. “Hot cocoa! And cookies to get the blood moving.”

  He wasn’t sure whether to kiss Geoff or punch him in the face. Ryan settled on grateful. He wasn’t an asshole. Ryan stood. “Thanks, man. That smells amazing, huh, Bleu?”

  “It does. Cream and… peppermint?”

  “Good nose.” Geoff smiled down at Bleu and helped him wrap those swollen fingers around the hot mug.

  “Thank you. I feel ridiculous.”

  “We’ve all lost track of time in the snow, honey. I need you all thawed so we can go tubing.” Geoff patted Bleu’s cheek. He was such a sweetie.

  “Yeah. I want to learn how to do everything. Everything.”

  “I know! Oh, hey, Dan. Do you want chocolate?”

  Ryan backed off when Dan came pelting in. “Bleu! Oh, you’re so cold.”

  “I was out playing in the snow.” Bleu’s grin was pure evil.

  Ryan snorted into the cup Geoff had handed him. Yeah. Those two had a weird thing, didn’t they?

  “Your hands!” Dan sighed. “I’ll get your lotion.”

  “Don’t stress it, man. I’m good. I had a ball. Did you see?”

  “I did.” Dan chuckled. “I need to go take pictures for your portfolio, you nut.”

  “Yep. A whole new media for me.”

  “Uh-huh. Stick to clay, dork.” Dan rolled his eyes and then grinned at Ryan. “I used to threaten to keep him on a leash, but I don’t bother anymore.”

  “No, I imagine that wouldn’t work well.”

  At the word leash, Floyd padded out of the kitchen, nails clicking across the uncovered areas of hardwood. They all laughed, and Bleu reached down to rub the shepherd’s ears. “Silly goober.”

  Bleu was so tactile, so happy to connect and laugh and touch, but he never once reached for Dan. Weird.

  Ryan shook it off. It wasn’t his place to judge, even if he wanted to just tell Dan to go away so he could bask in Bleu’s happy glow. He was the ex.

  Bleu was looking for him. He always felt that way. So weird. True, but weird.

  Ryan sighed. “I’m gonna go get changed, guys. Bleu, you got this?”

  “I do. Thanks.”

  “Bleu, you have on pajama pants with cartoons on them. You can’t be wandering around with those.”

  “I won’t. I’m going to the cabin and soak in the tub. Maybe a bubble bath. I wonder if they have any here….”

  “We do.” Stoney was back inside now. “Quartz, can you go get the wee packs of not flowery bath bubbles?”

  “Yessir. Thank you, Bleu. They’re the best snowmen ever!” Quartz really did sound so tickled.

  “I had the best time, man. You totally rock my world.”

  Stoney grinned as Quartz ran off. “I swear, Bleu, he’s never going to forget this. You made him the happiest kid on earth.”

  “Good. I had a ball.”

  They were still laughing and chatting when Ryan left the room after a soft goodbye to Bleu. His muscles were aching and his ski boots were like lead. Time for a rest. Tiny handed him a sandwich on the way through the kitchen, making him laugh. Food was totally love.

  Chapter Seven

  “YOU are going to break your neck one of these days, you know?” Dan’s voice was half-concern, half-laughter. “Tubing, freezing, what next?”

  “Tomorrow there’s going to be downhill skiing!” Bleu was finally going to feel what Ryan did.

  “Oh God, tell me they got you a good instructor.” Dan was more concerned now.

  “They have to take training and shit. No worries.” He wasn’t scared, why should Dan be?

  “I just want you to be safe,” Dan murmured.

  “I know.” But it didn’t matter. He wanted to be real; he wanted to play. He wanted to experience everything.

  That was the crux between him and Dan. That was why they’d broken up. Safety.

  “I know, hon. I love that about you, but it scares me.”

  “What are you going to do tonight? Is there a party?” The big unveiling was Saturday night, but the ranch had a bunch of different parties the entire week.

  “I have no idea. I haven’t checked the schedule.”

  “Me either,” he teased. “We could play Twister.”

  “Oh, yeah, because I’m so graceful.” Dan hooted. “The schedule is here.”

  “Tiddlywinks?” What the fuck were tiddlywinks anyway?

  “What’s gotten into you?” Dan squeezed his shoulders. “There’s a gala in Aspen, a night ski at Sunlight Mountain, and a brisket supper and a movie here.”

  “Are you going to Aspen?” Dan loved to wear a tux.

  “I think so. Do you mind?”

  “Of course not! Go! Find a studly little skibunny to fuck into the floor.”

  “Bleu!” Dan started to laugh.

  “Just remember to take condoms.”

  “I will. Even if you’re awful.”

  “I am. I want you to be happy. I want you to be well-fucked and joyous.”

  “I do too.” Dan kissed his cheek, which he’d felt coming, but it was still a surprise. “I think I’m going to shower, unless you need the bathroom?”

  “Go for it. I’m going to walk Floyd and go see if someone wants to feed me.”

  “You could call,” Dan said gently.

  “I could. I’ll bundle up. Maybe listen to the movie.”

  “Do you want me to call and make sure they have room at the table?”

  “No.” Did they find him a bother? He didn’t think so. No one ever acted like it. “No, I’m fine, Dan.”

  “Okay, hon. I’m going to shower and dress. Have a good night.”

  “You too. Report back in the morning!” He laughed as Dan huffed, but he knew Dan would find someone. He knew it.

  He would have the cabin to himself tonight. Forrest Gump time!

  First, though, he’d take Floyd out, take a walk, and peek in at the kitchen, see if he could say hi.

  He put his coat on and got Floyd leashed so he could do his business, then moved toward the main house.

  Should he go in at the kitchen again? Geoff was always there, and he didn’t seem to mind Bleu’s company. At least he thought so. He didn’t want to interfere with family time with Stoney and Ford, but he didn’t want to be a bother to Geoff. If they needed him to go to the main dining room, he would.

  Hell, he could even skip a meal. He’d been known to, when he was working.

  “You lost, Bleu?”

  “Huh?”

  “You’re heading a little left of the house, babe.” Ryan put Bleu’s hand on his arm.

  “Oh. I think Floyd is mad at me for having so much fun without him.”

  “He would have turned you back, right?”

  “Yeah. Yeah. Did you have a good day? Are you going to the big party in Aspen?”

  “Nope. It’s a fancy fundraiser. I am not allowed at those.” Ryan laughed.

  “Me either!” Although that wasn’t true. He was welcome; he just didn’t want to go.

  “Well, you just have this spill threat. Me? I tell sponsors to go fuck themselves. Stairs.”

  They headed up, and warmth hit him. Oh, he loved that sensation.

  “Hey, folks.” That was Tiny, welcoming them in.

  “Hello, Tiny. Are y’all busy?”

  “No, sir. Hell, Geoff called off the brisket dinner. Everyone is up to that big gala. I hope you two like mac and cheese.”

  “Oh God. Please. I love cheese and noodles. I make it in the microwave all the time.”

  “Well, you ain’t seen nothing like Geoff’s baked stuff, then.” Tiny laughed, a huge, booming sound.

  “Here, babe. Sit down.” Ryan tugged out a chair for him.

  “Thank you.” He settled down, keeping his hands in his lap.

  “No problem.” Ryan’s chair scraped out too, and someone placed glasses on the table.

  “Water,” Tiny said. “Anyone want a hot or cold drink? Tea, Coke, coffee? Hot tea?”

  “Can I have a Dr Pepper, please? Cherry, if you have it.”

  “We do. Stoney loves it.” The pop of a can opening was followed by more ice in a glass.

  “Thank you.” God, he loved that bubbly, sweet, fake cherry smell.

  “You’re so welcome.” Tiny joined them at the table, the chair creaking.

  “So did you and the Texan get it on, Tiny man?” Ryan asked.

  “What Texan? What did I miss?” Everybody knew everything.

  “Sam. Remember? I told you that you should meet him.”

  “Little artist. Dan liked him.”

  “Yeah.” Ryan chuckled. “Tiny was making with the wooing.”

  “He’s a lovely man,” Tiny rumbled.

  “Rock on!” He was all about getting laid.

  “Yeah. It rocked all sorts of things.” Tiny snorted, and they all laughed.

  “What did I miss?” Geoff said. “Oh! Yay. I made a lot of mac, and I was worried no one would eat it.”

  “I love macaroni. How was your day, Mr. Geoff?”

  “It was crazy. I’m glad the big Aspen thing is tonight so I can put my feet up.”

  “I can take the food to my cabin, if you want. Dan’s gone to the gala.”

  “Why would I want that?” Geoff sounded genuinely puzzled. “You guys are easy-peasy.”

  Oh, good. He wanted to be welcome and easy. “Thanks, Geoff.”

  “Why aren’t you going to the gala?” Ryan asked.

  “I’d totally be in Dan’s way.”

  “So, he just left you here?” Ryan’s voice rose a little.

  “Yep. He needs to go have fun.”

  “Dan always likes the fancy,” Geoff put in. “Bleu is a kitchen table kind of guy.”

  “You know it. He’s a champagne guy, and I’m a….”

  “Cherry Dr Pepper?” Geoff teased.

  “You got it.” Bleu nodded happily. Why was Ryan so darned upset about that? Maybe… maybe Ryan was jonesing on Dan? How weird would that be?

  “Why are you frowning so hard, babe?” Ryan murmured.

  “Am I?” He loved that, secretly, that babe. He also loved how Ryan helped him with his facial expressions. He had no idea sometimes.

  “You are.” Ryan touched the corner of his mouth. “Did you want to go? I’d take you.”

  “Go where?” This was perfect—good food, good company.

  “To the gala. I mean, you never were one for formals, but I can see how it would hurt to be left behind.”

  “Oh, God no. I don’t want to be stuck in a corner somewhere, listening to chatter and glassware.”

  “Okay, good. I really want that mac and cheese.” Ryan’s chuckle slid right up his spine.

  “Uh-huh. It smells like cheesy heaven.”

  “Can I ask you a question, Mr. Bleu?” Tiny asked.

  “Sure.” He was easy.

  “What do you do in your spare time? I think just sitting would be so boring….”

  He chuckled. “I play a lot on my computer. I listen to audiobooks. If I have someone over, I play cards or games—I love checkers and cribbage.”

  “He’s amazing at cribbage,” Ryan said. “Like wicked good.”

  “I am. I watch a lot of movies too, go to the coffee shop and read. Normal stuff.”

  “That’s really cool. I’ve never met someone who was blind before.” Tiny wasn’t being ugly at all, and Bleu loved when people asked real questions.

  “I don’t remember ever seeing, so I don’t miss it.” Sometimes he wanted to know what everyone else did, but he was basically okay. Not a burden.

  Ryan’s fingers curled around his, warm and comforting. Oh, he missed that, just the casual touching.

  He let his fingers move, trace one finger after another, draw a circle at the fleshy part of Ryan’s thumb.

  Ryan hummed, the sound so familiar, so hot. This was such a mistake, but he loved those callused hands. He remembered them on his body, unafraid to make his skin sing, to touch him deep and make him ache.

  Sometimes the loneliness got bad.

  “Babe, relax, huh?” Ryan smoothed out his forehead, pushing until the lines eased.

  “Sorry. Sorry. I was getting maudlin.” He chuckled, the mood lifting under Ryan’s care.

  “Maudlin? Why on earth for?” Geoff plopped something on the table in front of him, the smell of cheese heady. “Ta-da.”

  “Mmm… smells good.”

  “The ramekin is superhot, now. Take care.”

  “Okay.” He slid his fingers over the table, the heat glowing from the dish before he touched it.

  Wow. That had to be right out of the oven.

  Another something landed on the table. “Salad. You have your choice of balsamic or zesty italian. Acid to cut the richness, huh?”