Inside, the magic whispered for me to give in to it. To let it take control.

  “I’m okay,” I assured them. “Look.” I pulled the sheet aside so they could see my healed wounds. I’d cleaned off the dried blood earlier, and now, only a raised pink scar remained. “Already good as new.”

  The magic had helped more than my wolf, but I didn’t bother mentioning it now.

  Besides, Tiffany didn’t look assuaged.

  “We’re glad you’re okay,” she said. “But that doesn’t erase what they did. They need to pay.”

  “And they will,” I said just sharply enough to quiet the rumblings of unhappy voices. “Cohen is a monster. He put me in a cage simply because I’m a shifter. He hates us, and he’ll stop at nothing to destroy us. You can be sure Kai and I view what he did tonight as an act of war on this pack. We will respond in kind. But not tonight.”

  “Where is Kai now?” Luke asked.

  Everyone fell silent.

  “He’s dealing with the prisoner,” I lied.

  The prisoner.

  They didn’t know she was also my mother.

  “We need to learn everything we can from the woman Cohen brought here tonight,” I added. “Strategy, interrogation—these are the methods that will bring real victory when the time comes.”

  At my words, a few people frowned in disappointment, but no one argued. Maybe that had something to do with the rage currently zinging across my skin so that the air around me crackled.

  The pain in my stomach became a hollowness. A rumbling.

  The magic was hungry.

  “I swear to you I will not let this slide,” I said. “But tonight is supposed to be about the pack, and we’re not going to let anything break the sacredness of our time together. We will unify. Tether ourselves to one another. Bond with our own. And then, when the time is right, we will use our connection to take Cohen down once and for all.”

  I held my breath, waiting to hear their response. If they called for Cohen’s head now, I wouldn’t stop them. It would mean marching into a gunfight we might not win, but I couldn’t stand here and claim to be in this for their good without letting them control their own destiny.

  I wouldn’t decide for them like my parents had.

  Finally, Tiffany nodded. Cade too.

  And then, from the edge of the crowd, Vinny said, “We trust you, Ash. You tell us when it’s time, and we’ll end that asshole.”

  I stood in silence as the rest of them called out their own agreement. And then, Corbin called out the beginning of the pack run. Everyone filed outside, and one by one, the crowd began to shift. Gowns were tossed aside. Tuxes were shredded.

  My heart squeezed as I scanned the streets for Kai. The first group waited impatiently, clearly ready to go.

  “Lead them,” I told Corbin.

  “You sure?” he asked.

  I couldn’t shift. I’d already tried. But I didn’t tell him that.

  “I got it.”

  Kai stepped up beside me, naked and streaked in dirt. His eyes held a fire that threatened to burn me alive. It wasn’t friendly but it also wasn’t empty. There was recognition in the storm that swirled inside him. I could at least be glad for that.

  “Okay then.” Corbin moved away to shift, and I looked up at Kai, uncertain.

  “I can do the run,” he said.

  “I should stay,” I told him sadly.

  He pressed a soft kiss to my cheek. Then he was gone, striding to the front, shifting quickly—and leading our pack on its first united run in twenty years.

  I watched them go, my smile bittersweet. The moment’s significance wasn’t lost on me. We’d done it after all.

  Bound the pack to us and to one another. Not with our wolves and the alpha tether that came with them. But with bloodshed and loyalty and showing up for them over and over again.

  We were in this together now.

  Tonight had been one battle won; another lost.

  I couldn’t let myself think too hard about the victory, though.

  Not with the losses still eclipsing it all.

  Somewhere not far from here, Cohen still plotted our destruction.

  And even closer than that, my own worst enemy sat locked in a cabin—and I had no idea what to do about either one.

  Chapter Nineteen

  The moon drifted in and out of heavy cloud cover as I walked. The sheet didn’t do much to block the chill, but I didn’t need it. A heat radiated inside me now, threatening to ignite anything I touched. My phone had died miles ago. Not just the battery. The entire freaking thing. Thanks to the magic, it was a cooked piece of tech. At least, I’d managed to leave voice mails for both Kai and Oscar before that had happened. For all the good it would do. I hadn’t told them my destination. I hadn’t told anyone.

  Mostly because I didn’t have one.

  All I could think about was getting away. Distance. That’s what I needed. That was the only thing that could help my pack now.

  They were better off without me.

  The night seemed endless.

  More than once, my exhaustion had nearly sent me to my knees. At least, I hadn’t encountered anyone else. The pack run had probably ended hours ago now, but I’d half suspected to encounter at least one security patrol. There’d been no one. Or maybe they’d recognized me and steered clear for their own safety.

  Twice, I’d heard something. A brushing of leaves. Or a whisper of wind that didn’t seem natural. But I never saw or sensed anyone.

  It was only me in these woods.

  Me and the magic that left a trail of burnt leaves and singed earth as bread crumbs should anyone look hard enough to follow.

  I hoped they didn’t.

  Up ahead, finally, the campsite came into view. With a heaving sigh, I reached it and nearly fell onto the closest log. My relief was short-lived as I scanned the area and found it devoid of any company.

  He wasn’t here.

  I didn’t even know why I’d come in the first place; it all felt stupid now. Several minutes passed. My eyelids grew heavy. It wasn’t asleep exactly that my body was after. It was relief.

  Eventually, I found both.

  I woke to a hand nudging my shoulder. The magic responded with a zap, and my visitor cursed softly. My eyes flew open, and I shrank back. Dressed in a dark gray hoodie, Silas loomed over me in the soft light of dawn.

  “Ash, what the hell are you doing out here?”

  He looked pissed.

  I couldn’t even bring myself to care that I’d made him angry. Or that I’d invaded his personal hideaway. Desperation had won out, and I had zero shame left in me.

  “Si, please,” I said. “Just for a minute… Will you take it?”

  His angry expression tightened, and for a second, I was positive he would say no. But then he blew out a breath that puffed into the early morning air between us and hung his head.

  “Fine,” he said quietly.

  He sat on the log, and I pulled myself together, climbing up beside him. Dusting the leaves from myself, I found Silas staring at me with a look of muted horror.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Are you wearing a sheet?”

  “Oh. Yeah.”

  “It’s covered in blood.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Thanks for letting me know.”

  “What the hell happened to you? Is Kai—”

  “He’s fine. We both are.” I glared at him. “If you’d come to the pack run, you’d know, wouldn’t you?”

  He looked away. “I don’t have to explain myself to you.”

  Biting back an angry reply, I shoved aside my own feelings. This wasn’t why I’d come.

  “You’re right,” I said quietly. “Your life is your own. I came because the magic is stronger now. I…”

  As I spoke, sparks flew from my hands, landing in the cold, empty fire pit. The blackened wood caught, and a small fire crackled to life.

  Silas stared at me, shocked.

  “I need help,” I whispered.

  Around me, leaves curled inward as they singed black. Silas turned to face me.

  “Why the hell not.”

  He reached for me, and I braced myself for literal fireworks.

  His hand closed over my wrist and … nothing.

  The magic slipped away as easily as a breath.

  No sparks. No explosions. No pain.

  Silas’ expression tightened, and I could see in his eyes that he was feeling the effects of what he’d just taken from me. Guilt panged in my gut, but alongside it, relief rose, and so did my wolf.

  I inhaled, relishing the feel of her presence. Of my senses. My sanity.

  “Thank you,” I said.

  “I can keep it,” he said, and I looked up, startled.

  “What?”

  “The magic. I can keep it for a while if you want.”

  “How…?”

  That had not been part of the description when he’d told me about his strange little gift before.

  “I don’t know, but I’ve been practicing and—”

  “Practicing with who?”

  He looked away. “Don’t worry about it.”

  “Si, the hexerei are dangerous.”

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” He snorted. “They’re us, Ash. And last time I checked, you were the most dangerous of all.”

  “You know what I mean. If Cohen finds you on his land, he’ll kill you.”

  “He won’t find me,” he said in a hard voice.

  I didn’t argue.

  Mostly because it would risk ruining this moment, and the relief of having the magic drained from me even temporarily was too good to give up. My wolf howled, demanding to be let free.

  “Is it hurting you?” I asked when the silence stretched.

  The tension in Silas’ face had traveled to his shoulder. His grip had tightened on my wrist—more evidence he was struggling with what I’d given him.

  “It’s fine,” he said.

  “Silas.”

  He didn’t answer.

  Slowly, I began to pull away from him. He squeezed harder, and my eyes widened. His lips moved, whispering words I didn’t understand. Then he let me go.

  “What did you do?” I asked.

  He didn’t answer and, instead, watched me expectantly. But the magic didn’t slam into me like I expected. I felt it return but without the usual punch to my gut.

  “What did you do?” I repeated.

  “A dampening spell I picked up.”

  “You picked up,” I repeated.

  He looked away. “I’m not going to tell you where, so don’t ask.”

  “What does dampen mean exactly?”

  “What does it feel like?”

  “Like relief,” I admitted.

  He nodded. “The magic’s still there. I can’t do anything about that. But the effects should lessen for a while. It’s not permanent,” he added. “At least, I don’t think it is.”

  “Wait, you can do magic now? I thought you could only soak it up.”

  “I don’t know what I can do,” he said with enough resentment I decided to let it go.

  “Well, thank you.”

  “It’s a Band-Aid, Ash. Nothing more. You need to figure this out. Or it’ll kill you.”

  I didn’t bother to tell him Cohen had claimed I couldn’t die. Deep down, we both knew, at some point, the magic would stop saving me and Silas’ words would prove true. The magic would protect me until there was nothing left of me for it to protect.

  I had to figure this out before that happened. And that meant I had to stay. Leaving would only ensure I was too isolated to actually figure this out. Staying at least gave me a chance to fight for my own life. I had no idea when I’d decided, but suddenly I knew leaving wasn’t an option for me. Not ever again.

  “Come back with me,” I blurted.

  We both looked surprised.

  He shook his head. “I can’t.”

  “You’re still one of us,” I told him.

  “No,” he said sadly. “I’m not.”

  *.*.*

  I knocked on Kai’s door, hoping I’d made the right choice. Silas had dropped me here, but he hadn’t waited to make sure anyone was home. If not, I had a long walk back to the Throttle. But Kai opened the door almost immediately. At the sight of me, his expression transformed from worry to relief.

  “Ash.”

  He grabbed me and pulled me into a hug that threatened to crush me.

  “I was so damn worried. Where have you been?” he demanded, pulling away so he could glare at me.

  “I needed some time alone,” I said. “I left you a voice mail.”

  He was surprisingly himself, considering how we’d left things last night.

  “Yeah, a cryptic one.” He scowled. “You can’t go off like that alone anymore. It’s dangerous.”

  Actually, I was the dangerous one. But rather than argue, I changed the subject. “How was the run last night?”

  “Good,” he admitted, and I saw a spark in his eyes that had been missing before. “Crater met up with me, and we went hunting. I feel better than I have in weeks.”

  My eyes widened. “That’s great.”

  I tried not to think about the possibility that being near me made him worse.

  He softened, his fingers brushing my hair back. “Last night, I thought I might lose you. I’m sorry I treated you like that. I was so damn scared. And my wolf—there’s this darkness, Ash. I don’t know how to explain.”

  “No apology necessary. It’s the magic, Kai. It’s making us all crazy.”

  “You have to get rid of it.”

  I blinked. “I thought you wanted me to keep it. To use it against Cohen.”

  He shook his head. “It’s not worth it. You’re more than just a weapon, Ash. You’re my mate. I can’t lose you.”

  I nodded as tears filled my eyes. Whatever Silas had done to me, it had taken away the physical pain the magic caused me. But in its absence was the ability to feel all the things I’d ignored before. Sadness. Fear. Desperation. I’d chosen to stay and that made it so much clearer how much I stood to lose.

  “Okay,” I said. “Let’s get rid of it.”

  Kai’s mouth found mine, and I felt my own need rise to the surface. For once, it didn’t trigger a single natural disaster.

  My grip on him tightened.

  Kai’s tongue slid against my lips as he deepened the kiss.

  His hands came around my waist and then gripped my ass. He lifted me easily, and I wrapped my legs around him as he carried me into the bedroom. We made it as far as the doorway, and then I dropped my feet to the floor and turned, shoving the door closed and pressing Kai against it. His mouth curved against mine, and then, in a blink, he’d reversed the move, spinning me around and pinning me against the wall.

  “You have a thing against beds, don’t you?” he whispered.

  I grinned and reached for the button on his jeans.

  A knock at the door startled us both. We broke apart, and I debated the idea of ignoring whoever was out there in favor of doing dirty things with my mate.

  The knock came again. “I know you’re in there,” Idrissa called from outside. “I can hear you both breathing—or whatever else you’re doing. Gross.”

  Kai and I shared a look.

  “Stay here,” he whispered.

  I nodded, and he slipped out. Heart pounding, I listened as he opened the front door and their voices drifted back.

  “I need to talk to her.”

  Idrissa sounded half-apologetic and half-irritated.

  I sighed. So much for a daytime quickie.

  “She’s a bit indisposed,” Kai said.

  “Makes sense. The only person who actually disposes of people around here is me.”

  I winced. Wow. A Vorack joke. Way to ruin the mood.

  Kai tried to reply, but Idrissa interrupted. “I’m coming in,” she called, and I heard a grunt that I suspected was Kai’s unsuccessful attempt at blocking her entry.

  Footsteps sounded.

  A second later, Idrissa appeared in the bedroom doorway.

  “Hey,” I said, drawing my sheet up around me.

  “Becoming a regular wardrobe for you, isn’t it?” she said.

  “It’s been a long night.”

  Kai came up behind her, scowling. Idrissa slid aside as he moved past her to stand with his arms folded at the foot of the bed.

  “What’s up?” I asked.

  The irritation left her expression, and I was startled at the bleakness in her dark eyes.

  “Dris,” I said, tensing. “Is someone hurt?”

  “Yeah,” she said, and I started to jump up, but she put up a hand. “It’s your mom, Ash. She’s awake.”

  At that, I shut down. “So?”

  “So, I think you should go see her.”

  “No thanks.”

  “Ash.” Idrissa looked uncomfortable.

  “I have nothing to say to her,” I said. “And if you want to question her, you have my permission to interrogate her yourself. Or delegate it to whoever you choose. You don’t need me for that.”

  “She’s already offered to talk to any of us,” Idrissa said.

  “Good. Like I said, you don’t need me.”

  “Actually, we kind of do.”

  “I don’t care what she has to say,” I said in a hard voice.

  “That’s not it,” Idrissa said. “We need your magic.”

  “What the hell for?” I demanded, anger spearing through me at the thought of that woman demanding my magic. If any of it belonged to her, I would die before letting her get her hands on it again.

  “Not the magic you took from Cohen. The magic that’s already yours. You need to heal her,” Idrissa said. “Like you did with Baron, remember?”

  She sent a pointed look at Kai that seemed to say “help me.” But he remained silent. Clearly, he was letting me handle this.

  “Heal what? Did she get hurt last night?” I asked.

  “No, it’s not—” Idrissa sighed. “Ash, she’s dying.”

  Chapter Twenty

  An entire security team surrounded the little cabin behind Silas’ house. My stomach tightened at the sight of them. I wasn’t sure whether I was more concerned for their safety or at the idea of them witnessing the shitshow that was about to start.