When they walked in the door, his mother was in the kitchen cleaning up and Tommy was on the couch helping his father read directions on what looked to be a new Lego kit. His father loved doing them too.

  “How was dinner?” his mother asked. “You’re back earlier than I thought.”

  “We just started, Mom,” Tommy whined.

  “Dinner was good,” Ryder said. “And no one is kicking your grandparents out. They can stay and visit. Maybe I’ll jump in and help put that together too. Your grandfather and I spent a lot of time doing that.”

  “Did you do it with Uncle Sam or Uncle Bryce?” Tommy asked his father.

  “No. They had other interests. Everyone seems to find their niche and is good at their own thing,” his father said.

  “I’m like Ryder. I like to build and draw too.”

  “You are exactly like your father in many ways,” his mother said.

  “How else?” Marissa asked.

  “His mannerisms aside from his looks. The food he eats. The way he eats. The way he holds his utensils. Ryder probably doesn’t remember because he’s an adult now, but he always cut with his left and used his fork with his right. Then switched over later on.”

  Ryder laughed. “I remember that now. I’d completely forgotten about it.”

  “It’s a lot of little things. I haven’t spent that much time with Tommy, but every time I see him, I find something else. It’s been fun to see,” his mother said.

  He knew they were upset over the lost years too, but they were making the best of it just like he was.

  “Why don’t I make some coffee if you’re going to stay,” Marissa offered.

  “That would be nice,” Diane said. “I’ll show you where everything is.”

  “She knows, Mom,” Ryder said. “She’s been here enough. They’ve got free rein of the house.”

  “It’s fine,” Marissa said. “Your mom can come in the kitchen with me if she wants. I think she probably wants to give you boys some time alone.”

  “A mother knows those things,” his mom said and winked at him.

  There was no time to worry if his mother might say something to Marissa in the kitchen. He knew she would, it was just whether it’d help or hurt him in the long run.

  “What did you say to Marissa in the kitchen?” Grant asked Diane when they were driving home.

  “Not much,” she said. “Why?”

  “Because I wasn’t sure if you were going to start meddling or not. We just decided to intervene, but we don’t know if Ryder even wants to move ahead with any type of relationship with Marissa. No reason to put the cart before the horse if the horse doesn’t even want to be in the race.”

  She laughed at his analogy. “Grant. Ryder is the stud in the starting gate with the carrot in front of his nose ready to take off and mount that filly. You know it and I know it. But I didn’t say anything. We only talked about Tommy and dinner.”

  “They seemed different when they returned or was it just me?” he asked.

  “Not just you. Ryder is always looking at Marissa. Always trying to find her in the room. But she was doing the same. She seemed more relaxed. I noticed that they were closer to each other. He went to stand by her, almost touching her. Not putting his arm around her, but standing in her personal space. There was a comfort level there.”

  “Do you think they might try to give it another shot? Could they have talked about it in just over an hour?” he asked.

  “We’re talking about Ryder here. If he wants something, he’s going for it. He’s not pulling any punches. He opens his mouth and everything spews out. The good and the bad.”

  “The bad is what got us here. He saw something. He reacted. Open mouth, insert foot. The rest is history.”

  “It’s time to rewrite history,” she said. “They still have a ways to go, but I think they can do it. With our help of course. See, giving them that hour alone helped. We need to do it again.”

  “We can’t move too fast. Let’s wait until she goes back to Greenville and then see where Ryder is at. He’s not one to keep quiet for long. He’s always over shared before and if things are going well, he will again. Then we can decide what to do.”

  He wasn’t looking forward to telling his other sons the hand they’d had in how they met their spouses, but the truth was, it was all his wife and he’d let her take the fall if Sam and Bryce were upset.

  No, no. That was wrong. Still, he might hide behind her if he had to.

  “I can wait another week.”

  “You have no patience at all. Just like Ryder.”

  “But he’s going to learn to have it,” she said. “He has no choice if he wants this to work. I can tell you right now, Marissa won’t be jumping into anything fast.”

  23

  Have A Little Chat

  But Diane was wrong because, once Tommy was in bed, Marissa was ready to move.

  And if she was going to consider her and Ryder entering into a relationship, there was one thing she needed to know was the same.

  Were they compatible?

  Bryan had told her she was lousy in bed. That was one of his reasons for cheating on her all those years ago. One of the reasons she didn’t want to jump into another relationship. Especially with someone like Ryder.

  But he wore her down just like he was doing now.

  The few men she’d been with after Ryder left her empty inside. She’d get aroused and then be disappointed.

  Was she comparing everyone to Ryder or was she just not a sexual person?

  Before Ryder, she wondered if sex was just an act, but he’d taught her it was an expression of so much more.

  She needed to know if it was still there.

  If it wasn’t, if Ryder was disappointed in her, then they couldn’t go any further. She wouldn’t do that to him. She wouldn’t hold him back because he might want something that he remembered from years ago.

  It was a new day and a new time and with that came some courage that she had to put forth.

  Starting with now.

  “Do you mind if we have a glass of wine?” she asked when she walked into his kitchen. He had a nice wine fridge, not that she should be surprised by it.

  “Of course,” he said getting up. “What are you in the mood for?”

  “You’ve got a lot, you know what is good.”

  He went to the fridge and opened it, looked around while she took the time to glance at him squatting over, the muscles in his legs flexing. Yep, there was that arousal again. Guess she still had that much left functioning in her body.

  “If I remember correctly, you like a chardonnay?”

  “Sounds good,” she said.

  “Have a seat and I’ll bring it out.”

  She moved to the living room and took a seat on the couch right in the middle. He’d be forced to sit right by her or go to the chair. She was hoping he’d choose the couch.

  And he did, handing her the glass and sitting close enough that their bare legs in their shorts were touching. She turned though because she wanted to see him for this conversation.

  She took a sip knowing she’d need the liquid courage. “So,” she said. “Oh wow, this is good.”

  He laughed. “I’m a bit of a wine snob.”

  “I shouldn’t be surprised over that. You’ve always had good taste in things.”

  “Present company included.”

  “There’s that charm again.”

  “You liked it before. I’m glad to be able to bring it out without having to worry you’d shoot me down.”

  She felt bad about that. “I won’t. But we need to have a little chat.”

  “Oh boy. What no man wants to hear. I’d ask what I did wrong, but I don’t think I did in the past few hours. Did my mother say something that upset you?”

  Talk about sweet. “No. We had a lovely conversation in the kitchen about being a parent and nothing more. She got a little teary eyed seeing three generations together and we stood back to admire it. I think she took a few pictures, but I’m not supposed to say that to you.”

  “She takes pictures of everything. At least it was on her phone and not her camera since I didn’t see it with her. But on her phone she tends to send it to everyone, so I’m sure she did.”

  “Which is very nice. But that isn’t what I wanted to talk to you about.”

  He took a sip of his wine; she took another big gulp and rested the glass on her thigh. “You look nervous for some reason. There is no reason to be. Just tell me what is on your mind.”

  Deep breath this time. “After our conversation earlier I realized there is something we need to address before we can go any further.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Sex.”

  This time he gulped. “Ah, okay. Don’t worry, you put me in my place the other night.”

  “About that. I was wrong. I guess I reacted and shouldn’t have. There’s a reason for it.”

  Another sip and she realized her glass was almost empty. “Are you going to tell me what that reason is or are we going through a bottle before you have the courage?”

  She finished the glass off and then set it down. This was embarrassing for her. “Let me start by saying that my ex, Bryan, the one you thought I cheated on you with…I never told you the whole story of our breakup.”

  “He cheated on you,” he said. “I remember you saying that. I guess that is why it bothered me so much when I thought you were doing the same with me.”

  “He did cheat on me. He had all sorts of reasons and excuses. He said he loved me, but he needed more than I could give him.”

  “More meaning sex?” he asked. “You weren’t a virgin.”

  “No, I wasn’t. But he said that I wasn’t very good in bed.” There. It was out of her mouth and the floor didn’t open up and suck her in.

  Ryder laughed. “That’s funny. I sure the hell wouldn’t say that. I’d say we had a damn good sex life.”

  “Thanks, I think. I mean I thought we did. It was different than what I had with Bryan.”

  “I’m not sure I want to know what was different but then the other part of me needs to know.”

  “Bryan said I was cold. I didn’t want to do much more than the normal positions. I don’t know. I don’t remember it all other than it hurt to hear it. To have it put on my shoulders when I never saw it coming.”

  “Sorry,” he said. “I have no negative thoughts about our sexual relationship. I’m not going to lie and say I haven’t been with other women in the past nine years. But there was something special with you. Not sure if it was an emotional connection with the physical or not.” He put his hand on her leg and rubbed up and down. “I’m not just saying that either. I truly mean it.”

  She felt herself starting to get damp. Damn it all. It was still there strong. “I know you do. I can see it in your eyes. I think that was part of it. But after Tommy was born, it was years before I was with someone again. And those few men I was with, there was arousal and not much else. It was an act that left me wanting something that I haven’t been able to find.”

  “Did you tell them that?”

  “No,” she said. “I didn’t want a fight and I figured it was me. Maybe they just didn’t have enough for me or maybe my hormones were out of whack after having a kid. I just gave up.”

  “So, what are you saying to me?” he asked.

  “I’m saying that I think I need to know what it is before it goes any further. I don’t want to give false hope for a future for either of us if I can’t get past this.”

  He set his glass down. “Are you asking me to take you to bed to see if I can make you feel what you want? What you need? To make you remember what it was like to be in my arms? To be a woman again?”

  She was pretty sure there was a flood between her legs with his words. “Yes.”

  He stood up and held his hand out to her. “Tommy out for the night?”

  “He is. I’ll go check one more time. Are you sure? I don’t want to muddy things up. I just don’t know how else to do this.”

  He laughed. “I know what to do. Just trust me.”

  “That isn’t what I meant,” she said.

  “I know. I’m trying to lighten the mood. Go check on our son and meet me in my room. Does that work for you?”

  She nodded her head and walked away, turned the corner to Tommy’s room, saw him sound asleep and breathing steadily, then gathered everything she had and moved to the other side of the house.

  To Ryder’s bedroom.

  To get naked.

  To climb in his bed.

  To have sex.

  To feel like a woman again. Exactly what she’d been missing.

  When she stepped into his doorway she saw his room was a shade of blue darker than Tommy’s. Big black furniture. It was modern and masculine in here.

  “This is a big room,” she said.

  “You can admire it all later. I’m going to take your mind off of everything else.”

  “Please do,” she said, walking into his arms.

  He held her for a minute. He ran his hand up and down her back. And he started to kiss her neck.

  Shivers erupted everywhere distracting her to the point she didn’t even realize her shirt was being lifted over her head.

  “Look at you,” he said. “Still so tiny and in great shape. I’d never know you had a baby. My baby.”

  “Trust me, I still remember it.”

  “Don’t think of that now. I shouldn’t have brought it up. It was meant as a compliment. How beautiful you are.”

  He ran his knuckles down her cleavage, then slid his hand behind her and unhooked her bra, pulling the straps off her shoulders and leaving her exposed to his eyes, his hands going right to her breasts and filling his palms up.

  Her head fell back, her nipples hardened peaks that were almost painful.

  Her knees were shaking and her body needed a release in the worst possible way.

  He undid her shorts and removed the rest of her clothes, then stood back and looked his fill. “Yeah, More beautiful than I remember. Real. Natural.”

  His words were washing over her like a caress, then she was floating.

  No, she was in Ryder’s arms and he was laying her on the bed, stepping back and flinging his clothes off fast like she remembered he used to do.

  He took care with her but was impatient to join her. When he opened a drawer beside his bed, he grabbed a condom and then laid it on the bed, but didn’t make an attempt to put it on.

  Nope, he moved over the top of her, put his lips to hers, and gave her a kiss like those still in her memory.

  His lips were soft and firm at the same time. His tongue nudged her mouth open, then slipped in, the tangy taste of wine dueling with hers, her hips rising and needing more.

  She could kiss him all night long, but there had to be more and it had to be soon.

  He laughed softly, as if he knew exactly what was happening to her body. “Sorry. I just needed to taste you again. It’s been so long. It’s the same for me. You?”

  “Yes,” she said. “Show me more.”

  His tongue slid down her neck to her nipples. One was pulled into his mouth and suckled, the other pinched between his thumb and finger and she thought she was going to come instantly. “Ryder.”

  “I know. Hang on,” he said and moved down further between her legs. “You’re so wet. All for me.”

  “Yes,” she said. “All for you.”

  Rather than touch her with his hands, his mouth went to her. Right to her swollen clit, pulling it into his mouth and she almost shot off the bed with how fast she started to throb.

  He continued on. He sucked and he nibbled and then he slid two fingers inside of her and she felt like she was coming undone.

  It was the endless orgasm that showed no signs of stopping. And when she thought her body had nothing else left to give, he still wouldn’t stop.

  “I’m good,” she said.

  “Not even close,” he said. “Or maybe I’m not.”

  She didn’t have a lot of fight in her and let him go. Why would she stop him when it felt as good as it did?

  Just when she thought she was going to come again, he pulled back. “No,” she said.

  He laughed. “I won’t leave you hanging. I’m just not sure I can hold back any longer.”

  She heard the wrapper open, then felt him slide over her and then inside of her.

  So big. So full. So much.

  He pulled out and she lifted up to meet him. Then he moved back.

  They found a rhythm. Just like years ago. Their bodies were meeting and retreating and she was building again.

  How was it possible she was going to come again after having the longest and strongest orgasm of her life?

  There was no explanation other than it had to be Ryder.

  And when her legs came up and went around his back, he started to increase his speed, his hands under her ass holding her there as he slammed into her again and again.

  She was trying to control the scream that wanted to be ripped from her lips.

  There was no reason to worry as Ryder’s lips crushed hers, his tongue in her mouth, the two of them working both ends of their bodies the same way until every part of her tensed and then just released until neither of them were doing much more than breathing.

  “Still worried about moving forward with me?” he asked.

  She started to laugh uncontrollably. “I think you know the answer to that.”

  24

  Time Makes No Difference

  The next morning Ryder rolled over and saw the bed empty next to him.

  He didn’t remember too much other than he’d never been so depleted of energy after sex as last night.

  He’d gone into the bathroom to take care of the condom and came back out to find Marissa was fast asleep in his bed.

  He pulled her into his arms and held on, then was passed out seconds later.

  But now he was alone and his thoughts were running away with him.