“It’s not quite what I imagined. I mean it is homey, but it’s also huge. Bigger than any home I’ve ever stepped foot in.” She laughs. “I can’t imagine what my nan would think of this place.”

  I peer sideways at her. “I wish she could have seen it.”

  Raelynn nods and looks down at her coffee. “Me too.”

  I reach over and take her hand, covering it with mine. We sit quietly for a bit, and I know she’s thinking about her late grandmother. I let her have a few minutes of peace before I speak up.

  “What do you have to do today?”

  “Well, it’s actually spring break next week, and most of my friends have left town. I was going to use the time to catch up on work.”

  When she talks, I have a hard time listening. The early morning sun is highlighting every feature I love about her, from her pale hair to her bright eyes. I blink and refocus on what she just said before I ask if she’s behind.

  She frowns. “No, I just like working ahead. Always have. I’m the type to finish an assignment the day it’s given to me. I never wait until the last minute. It gives me anxiety just thinking about it.”

  I hide my smile.

  “Caleb will be coming over later this morning.”

  She perks up. “Really?”

  I nod. “During offseason, Shelby and I split custody fifty-fifty, but she works with me during the season when I travel a lot so I can see him when I have light days like today. I have to leave town tomorrow for another game, and it’ll be a few days until I get to see him again.”

  “Right, yeah. I think Eva mentioned something like that. You guys are heading to New York, right?”

  “Yeah, we play the Knicks at Madison Square Garden.”

  “And then on to Oklahoma City?”

  “Two days after,” I confirm.

  She smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “Busy busy.”

  “Does that scare you?” I ask, careful to keep my gaze on her. I want her real reaction, not her practiced, measured response. If she’s intimidated by my schedule, I want to know so we can work through it.

  She takes her bottom lip between her teeth for a moment, mulling it over.

  “It’s just…unusual.”

  “Have you been in relationships like it before? Long distance?”

  There’s that rosy blush again.

  She clears her throat. “I haven’t done relationships, long distance or otherwise.”

  “Good. So then there’s nothing to compare me to,” I say, bumping my shoulder lightly against hers, trying to coax a smile out of her.

  She looks up, and I watch her force a swallow before asking plainly, “So do you see us like that? In a relationship, I mean in the future…”

  “Didn’t I already say so?”

  For the first time all morning, she lets loose a real genuine smile, white teeth, dimples and all. Before I can help myself, I lean in and kiss her.

  “Daddy! Kiss! Daddy! Kiss!” Caleb shouts, taking me by surprise.

  I jerk away from Raelynn just as my son leaps into my arms, spilling my coffee all over us in the process. I swear under my breath before I can help it. That’s just what I need: him learning a colorful new curse word and repeating it in front of Shelby.

  Thank god my coffee is lukewarm at this point. I’ll take the coffee stains; it’s the burns on Caleb and Raelynn I’m worried about.

  “Oh nooo,” Caleb says, pushing out his bottom lip. He leans back and points down to my shirt. “Dirty.”

  “You okay, bud?” I ask, checking to make sure he didn’t get any coffee in his eyes or anything.

  “Caleb!” Shelby shouts, running around the corner of the house after him. “You can’t just jump on people like that. What if Daddy’s coffee had been hot?”

  I glance up to see her come to a sudden halt, her stern mom face slipping, replaced with wide-eyed shock once she sees I’m not alone.

  Then quickly, I look over at Raelynn, who’s gone white as a sheet. This isn’t exactly how I wanted this all to go. I wanted her to meet Caleb, sure, but not like this, and maybe not so soon. And she obviously was going to meet Shelby at some point too, but again, not like this.

  I meet Shelby’s apologetic gaze, and she mouths, “Sorry.” Then she rushes over to get Caleb off me. “Here, Caleb, let’s go get you cleaned up, and we’ll let Daddy and his friend get cleaned up too.”

  Caleb ignores Shelby even as she starts tugging him away.

  “Kiss,” Caleb says, puckering his lips and looking between Raelynn and me.

  A laugh bursts out of Shelby before she can help it, and then she quickly slaps her hand over her mouth. “Sorry! Sorry! Caleb, let’s go.”

  “Cay-yub stay!” he says, trying to wrench himself out of her grasp.

  “I think Daddy and his friend might want some privacy. Let’s just go change really fast.”

  “No!”

  “You want to put on your Spider-Man costume?” she asks, growing desperate now.

  Usually that wins him over, but not today. “No! Daddy!”

  I meet her gaze and nod to let her know it’s alright. There’s no need to make him more upset.

  “He’s been asking about you all morning.” Shelby sighs, letting him go so he can rush back to me. He throws himself against my body like the little wrecking ball that he is. Pure muscle, this kid. He climbs up and on top of my lap, swinging his legs as he looks over at Raelynn.

  “Hi,” she says, speaking up for the first time.

  We all three look at her in shock.

  “I’m Raelynn,” she says to Caleb, offering him a little wave.

  “Ray-yin,” Caleb repeats.

  She smiles. “Good job.”

  “Kiss,” Caleb says again.

  I laugh despite myself. “You’re really going to hang on to that, aren’t you?”

  Raelynn glances up at Shelby and shakes her head like she’s forgotten something.

  “Sorry, I should have introduced myself to you as well. I’m Raelynn. I’m not sure if you remember me from the diner back in Texas or—”

  “Yes, of course. Right. I’m Shelby. Nice to meet you again.”

  They shake hands and I stand, taking Caleb with me. “Sorry I’m doing such a bad job of mitigating the awkwardness of this situation. Shelby, I thought you weren’t bringing Caleb until closer to lunch time?”

  She rocks back on her heels. “Right, but I figured you wouldn’t mind if we were a little early. You’re usually excited if I bring him early. Just today, you were…occupied.”

  Raelynn clears her throat and looks away.

  “Breakfast for the lovebirds!” Nina singsongs as she pushes open the back door and walks outside, arms laden with plates. Then she glances up, sees Shelby and Caleb, and blanches. “Oh sorry. I didn’t realize you were here too, Shelby.”

  “I came around the side yard. Caleb wanted to check on the garden.”

  Nina nods. “Right. Well how about I set these plates down then Caleb and I can go out and check the garden while you three talk.”

  Caleb wriggles out of my arms to go off with Nina, leaving me alone with my brand-new girlfriend and my ex-wife. What could possibly go wrong?

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Raelynn

  This situation is horrible from every angle. I would never choose to see Shelby again looking like this. I’m not wearing a bra, and my shirt and boxer briefs—which both very obviously belong to Ben—are now stained with coffee and partly see-through. I’ve got massive bedhead, probably some of last night’s makeup still on my face, and I’m about to sit down to breakfast with Ben’s ex-wife—who, by the way, is just as amazingly gorgeous as she was the first time I met her. I can’t even look straight at her. It’s just, god, she’s one of those women who really takes good care of herself. She looks fresh as a daisy this morning, and it’s not just her skin and hair—she’s in great shape too. Her muscular arms put mine to shame, and now I’m really kicking myself for not doing a push-up or two over the years.

  “I really am sorry about all of this,” she says, hovering awkwardly as Nina leads Caleb out toward the garden.

  Our food is waiting for us on the table, and even though I’m starving, I really need to run in and change out of these clothes, or better yet, dig a hole to China and escape this situation altogether.

  “I’m actually going to run in and freshen up really quick,” I say, purposely avoiding eye contact with both of them before I hop up off the bench and dart back through the kitchen. I try to retrace my steps to get to Ben’s bedroom, but it’s not as easy as I remember. I first end up in the laundry room and then another half-bathroom before finally making it to his room. Unfortunately, I don’t have much to choose from in terms of clothes, but I can at least put my bra back on. I don’t really want to wear my crop top again, so I borrow another t-shirt from Ben and knot it on my hip so it doesn’t drown me. I decide to go commando underneath my jean cutoffs rather than put on yesterday’s panties. In the bathroom, I dig in the toiletry bag until I find a hair tie and brush. I toss my hair up into a ponytail and brush my teeth. I wash my face and apply deodorant and feel moderately more human by the end, but I’m still not quite up for going back out there.

  Crap.

  I just met Ben’s son and his ex-wife, arguably the two most important people in his life, and did I even smile? Yes…I think. And I introduced myself, so there’s that.

  My heart stopped when I first saw Caleb. He’s so ridiculously adorable, so gosh-dang cute I could barely stand it. He takes after both of his parents so beautifully. He has his mom’s coloring—light black skin and dark brown curly hair—and Ben’s big smile. From our brief encounter, I could tell he has lots of energy. I mean, he tackled Ben on the patio swing, spilled coffee everywhere, and seemed totally unaffected by it all. I wonder what he likes to do, if he enjoys reading or if he can even manage to sit still long enough to get through a book. I wonder if he likes the stars painted on the ceiling of his room, and now I wish I were out there with him and Nina, tending the garden and getting to know him better. I haven’t been around kids all that much. I didn’t grow up with any siblings or cousins, and I’m embarrassed to realize I didn’t know Caleb would already know how to talk a little bit. I mean, admittedly, his words are kind of garbled, but I could understand him just fine.

  I sigh and realize Caleb isn’t the one that scares me. No. It’s Shelby.

  I cringe, wondering what she thinks of me. Surely she doesn’t assume I’m just some girl Ben brought home from the club last night, a one-night stand. Has Ben told her anything about us? She acted like she remembered me from our brief meeting at Dale’s, but she could have just been being polite.

  The longer I stay in Ben’s room, the harder it seems to muster the courage to go back outside and face them all again. I sit on the edge of his unmade bed and try to recapture some of the magic I felt this morning. I can smell his scent lingering in the air. It already feels like a million years ago that we were alone in here together, kissing.

  I glance over to see my purse waiting for me on the nightstand. I reach for it and tug out my phone, thankful it still has a tiny bit of juice left even though I forgot to charge it last night. I pull up the maps app and check the bus routes back to Caltech. There’s a city bus that picks up right outside of Ben’s neighborhood. From there, it cuts through Hollywood and around Glendale. In total, it would take me an hour and a half to get home. I’d have to do a good bit of walking in my cowboy boots to get to the first stop and pray I don’t get blisters, but it seems like the only viable option.

  More determined than ever, I dig in my purse and find a scrap piece of paper and a pen I use to write Ben a quick note that I leave on his nightstand. He’ll see it eventually…

  I turn off my phone to save the last bit of battery I have and stuff it back into my purse before heading out into the hallway, only to run smack-dab into Ben’s chest.

  He grabs me by my shoulders, trying to steady me.

  “Whoa, hey, slow down. It’s not a race,” he teases, then his smile falls once he sees I have all my things with me. “Are you leaving?”

  I nod. “Yes. I texted you,” I say lamely, pointing back to where his phone’s charging.

  He frowns, obviously confused. “Did something come up?”

  I look down the hall, toward my freedom.

  “No…it’s just…”

  He bends so his brown eyes can catch mine, and the sincerity there makes me feel all the guiltier for trying to sneak out.

  “I’m trying to fix this,” I add. “I know you weren’t planning to introduce me to Caleb today, and it probably made Shelby really uncomfortable to find us like that this morning. I mean, that is not how I wanted to meet your family.”

  He drops a bag on the ground then reaches out to take my hands. I didn’t realize I was waving them around so much until they hang down at my sides, held in place.

  “Yeah, it’s not ideal, but the last thing I want is for you to leave. Everyone was going to meet eventually, and sure, I wasn’t planning on it going like this either, but Shelby understands.”

  I look over his shoulder, down the hall toward my escape as I tick my jaw back and forth, gathering the courage to finally ask, “Does she think I’m just a girl you picked up at the club? She acted like she remembered me back there, but she probably meets a lot of people.”

  He rears back, almost annoyed by the question. “She knows who you are.”

  The sincerity in his voice causes tears to gather in the corners of my eyes, but before they fall, he brings me up against his chest and wraps his arms around me.

  “This is all…a lot. I know that,” he says quietly, reassuring me.

  It’s not until now that I consider how much I’ve gone through in the last twelve hours. No wonder I was looking up bus routes. Any normal person would be running for the hills.

  “Hang in there a bit longer? Okay?” he asks gently.

  I nod and he backs up, holding me at arm’s length as he bends to get the bag he set down a moment ago. He holds out the large black shopping bag for me to take.

  “I was bringing this to you.”

  I peer inside, past a layer of tissue paper.

  “Nina had some things rushed over,” he explains. “I’m ashamed I didn’t think of it myself.”

  “Wow, that was really nice of her.”

  “That’s Nina for you. She thinks of everything.”

  I smile and look up at him.

  “You’ll stay?”

  What choice do I have? I won’t turn down his request, not when he’s looking down at me like that, so hopeful and earnest. I press up onto my toes and kiss his cheek.

  “Let me just change really quickly, and I’ll meet you back outside. Tell Shelby I’m sorry for making her wait.”

  “She doesn’t mind. She went down to check on Caleb anyway.”

  Once I’m alone in his room again, I unpack the bag quickly, trying and failing to withhold my gasps when I check the price tags on everything. Nina must have ordered a rush delivery from the fanciest boutique she could find. Good grief. $98 for a pair of silk black underwear?!

  In addition to the underwear, there’s a bra, two shirts, and a pair of jeans. At the bottom, there are even some cosmetics.

  I push past the urge to return it all and instead start to dress. Nina was good at guessing my size. The simple white sleeveless tank I pull out fits me like a glove. I pair it with the relaxed boyfriend-style jeans that are only slightly too big.

  I’m quick in the bathroom, dabbing on a little bit of makeup, and I feel a hundred times better when I emerge out onto the back patio again to find everyone sitting around the table, even Nina, eating a late breakfast.

  They all make a fuss as I approach, welcoming me back and smiling big as if they all agreed beforehand to be extra nice to me when I returned.

  “Here, sit,” Ben says, tugging out the chair beside him, across from Nina.

  Caleb’s sitting in a high chair at the end of the table. He flashes me a big toothy grin as I pass by, clearly proud of all the egg he’s got stuffed in his mouth.

  I can’t help but smile as I take my seat. Ben takes the empty plate in front of my chair and starts loading it up with food for me to choose from: an almond croissant, fresh fruit, a small yogurt parfait, and some bacon that’s still warm.

  “That’s plenty,” I tell him, taking the plate before he can keep piling things onto it. I won’t be able to finish all the food as it is. “Thank you.”

  Shelby sits across from Ben, cutting up bites of fruit for Caleb to eat. We glance at each other, make eye contact, and then both immediately look away. It’s all so silly, I know that, but this is uncharted territory for everyone and it’s probably going to be uncomfortable for a little while.

  “So Raelynn, Ben tells me you’re in graduate school at Caltech,” Shelby says with a warm smile. “That’s really impressive. What are you studying?”

  I flush. “Oh, it’s…well…I’m doing both computer programming and electrical engineering.”

  Nina hums like she’s impressed.

  “So will you try to go into work as a programmer after you graduate?” Shelby asks. “Develop your own apps and things?”

  Ben reaches his arm across the back of my chair, and I appreciate his quiet show of support.

  “I do write code, yes, but not for apps or anything that cool.” I tack on a self-deprecating laugh. “Right now, we’re working on perfecting a program for photographing objects in space that can’t be easily captured by standard methods: black holes, distant galaxies, that sort of thing.”

  Shelby blinks, then blinks again, then shakes her head and laughs. “I’m sorry, I don’t really think I understood how smart you are. Ben warned us, but…”

  The flush on my face ramps up until my cheeks are undoubtedly a bright shocking red.

  Fortunately, Caleb saves me from continuing to be the center of attention by chucking a good bit of egg across the table. It lands with a splat in front of Nina’s plate.

  “Caleb, food stays on our plates,” Shelby says sternly.