He stared long and hard at me. “What do you want?”

  “First, I want you to call your bud Benny and tell him to drop the charges against me.”

  “He won’t—”

  “Be persuasive,” I cut him off, going through his phone and hitting play on another recording.

  The chief of police’s voice played from it, “Goddammit. That kid is bleeding us dry. Plant shit on him, if need be. I want him gone. Do you hear me?”

  “But Ben—”

  I was smirking again. “We know what the rest of that said, and I know what the rest of the recording said, but I bet the kid he’s talking about would be very interested in hearing it. Should I send it? He’s probably out of prison by now.”

  He was gritting his teeth. “You’ve made yourself more than heard. I’ll call and get your charges dropped.”

  “Great!” I beamed at him before tossing a third phone his way. “Do it now.”

  He frowned, catching it, and staring in confusion at the phone. “This is—”

  “Yeah. That’s your phone too.” I raised the one I was holding, the one that was also his. “This is a clone of your phone, and by the way, good luck figuring out how to de-clone it. Also, just letting you know that if you try to get a new phone, everything you have on there will be transferred to your new one, including the cloning program. The only way you can start new is a new phone and all new accounts. Which you won’t do because that’s exhausting. Am I right?”

  “That’s too much evidence you have on me.”

  “You’re right. It is, and I get that. So, here’s what I’ll do: as soon as you get the charges dropped against me, I’ll turn the cloning program off. I’ll even show you how I do it.”

  He was looking between his phone and the one in my hand, his eyebrows pinched together. “I don’t get it. There has to be a catch.”

  “There’s no catch. I’m going to be honest, when I decided to hack you, I had no idea what I would find. I figured there’d be some things there, but not the landfill I found. I’m only here for two reasons, to make you drop the charges against me and to let you know that if you think about coming after me, everything I found was sent to five other people. So, if something happens to me, they’ll release the information, and I’m talking about anything, like an accident. Or if I end up in a coma, anything like that where I can’t tell them that you weren’t behind it. They’ll make the assumption that it’s from your hands. I have no plans on getting into a pissing contest with you. That’s not who I am. I’m usually a go-with-the-flow kind of guy. My friends, not so much, but we can’t all be blessed with my amazing genes. So, are we good? Have you pissed your speedo enough?”

  He looked visibly shaken. “Be careful, Allen. I still do business with your father.”

  My grin was gone. “Yeah. The very few recordings you had on him, where you blackmailed him, those are gone. You’ll never find them again. Don’t enter into a pissing contest with me. You’re an artifact when it comes to technology. In that world, I’m the giant and you know it.” I nodded at his phone. “Make the call, Mitchell.”

  He did.

  There was protesting on the other end, but he got him to drop the charges, saying he recently rethought about pissing off Allen Sr. The chief agreed about a bit, telling him that my lawyer would be notified within the hour.

  Once he was done, I showed him the cloning program and hit the stop button.

  He was searching his own phone for where it was, uninstalling it immediately.

  I didn’t have the heart to tell him that actually activated the secondary one I had planted because that’d been the plan. With guys like Mitchell, I figured I might want to keep an eye out on what he was going to be doing in the next few weeks, just to be safe.

  “Your girlfriend still has an account at my bank. She doesn’t use it, but it’s still there.”

  I had started to leave, feeling there wasn’t anything else to say. I was corrected and I spun around, my old smirk back in place. “No. I closed it for her this morning. All records you have on her are wiped.” I gave him a two-finger salute, heading for the back door.

  “Zeke,” he called after me.

  I didn’t turn around but paused with the door half open.

  He said, “Be careful. I’m a small bee in a larger hive.”

  I gave a small nod because I was fully aware of it. There was always corruption that I could hack. This time, it was my first time doing it for something like this. Guess we all had to grow up at some point.

  I waited until I was off his land, back in my Jeep, before I spoke to the person on the phone.

  “Did you get all that?”

  Logan Kade said back, “I did, and I concur. I had no idea what I’d be listening in on when I answered your call, especially fascinated that you told him someone had been listening the whole time since I only caught the last ten minutes. You’re full of surprises lately, Allen.”

  “He had a murderous look to him. I was thinking on my feet.”

  “I gathered, and I’m guessing the call I’m getting from the Fallen Crest Police Department will be the Chief letting me know your charges have been dropped. Would you like me to reciprocate and you listen in as well?”

  I was starting to laugh and agree right as someone got inside my Jeep, on the passenger side and slammed the door shut. “Uh. I better not.”

  “Zeke—”

  I hung up. “What are you doing here?”

  24

  AVA

  “You’re blackmailing people?”

  I was furious. And trembling. And my God, I couldn’t stop shaking so I sat on my hands. But I kept glaring because that was really important. Glaring. Letting him see how enraged I was, and my word, I—I didn’t know what else I was feeling because it was all rolling together in my tummy, in one molten ball of lava.

  His eyebrows shot up. “How do you—” Wariness came over him. “Aspen?”

  “Yes, Aspen. She called me and told me what you were going to do.”

  He cursed, looking away.

  “Are you kidding me? Do you know how much trouble you’re going to get into for this?”

  He looked back, his eyebrows furrowing together. “I’m not, that’s the point.”

  “Zeke—”

  “No, Ava. Listen. This is what we do, in my group of people. We blackmail and we burn buildings down and we fight people and we break into places—it’s what we do.”

  “I don’t!”

  I couldn’t. No, no, no. I had too much to lose.

  My grandmum—my mom. I couldn’t lose my mom. I tasted salt and flicked away whatever tear had trailed down because it wasn’t helpful right now.

  “You don’t get it.”

  “I do!” I cried out, because I did. I really did. “You think that people don’t watch you? That they don’t see what you and your friends do? And I know you’re all connected. You to Blaise. Blaise to Aspen. Aspen to her brother. Her brother to the Kades. The Kades to my boss! My boss to Bren and her whole group. You’re all interconnected and I do know what you guys do. I just thought—” I looked away because what had I thought? That Zeke was different?

  He wasn’t.

  I was the fool for thinking that.

  “You and people like you don’t understand that when you guys do the things you just said, you’re not the one who gets hurt. For whatever reason, it’s not you. It’s never you. It’s the others. The bystanders. The people on the outskirts. It’s people like my mom, like my grandmum. It’s people like me.” My voice cracked. “We’re the ones who get hurt and we’re the ones who have to spend the rest of our lives dealing with it, surviving it, existing despite it. My grandmother couldn’t escape my grandfather. She kept expecting him to come and ‘finish her off.’ That’s how he was, how she was. That kind of thing doesn’t leave you. It stayed with her, stayed with my mom, stayed with me. My mom lost her legs in an accident. Did I tell you how she lost them?” I turned away, tasting my tears, but my God, he needed to understand it. “My dad was drunk, and he got into a fight. And he was driving, and my mom was in the car, and guess what happened? She lost her legs, and then he left her, so she lost her husband too.”

  He looked visibly stricken. “Ava—”

  “She lied.” I just kept tasting those tears. I guess they needed to be released. “When the cops came in and asked what happened, because my dad was sober by then, she lied. She said he lost control. It was raining and it was just an accident. He repaid her kindness by leaving her because he didn’t want to be saddled taking care of a disabled wife. Those were his words. But if you ask me, she’s not disabled. She’s not anything. She’s my mom, and she’s never let her not having two legs stop her from doing a damned thing. It never will. If she’s gotta get upstairs, trust and believe, she will. She will lift herself all the way up, two stairs at a time, and she’ll rig a rope or something and get her chair up behind her. My mom can do anything.” My voice cracked again. “But I can’t. She’s the survivor, not me. I’m exhausted. That’s what I am. I am just exhausted from life because the whole of it, I’ve just been trying to get by while the rest of you, the God-blessed ones, you live. Not me, though. Not me.” I knew I was fully crying, and I didn’t care.

  I was just feeling the crushing weight of the impending doom coming my way. This time, I knew I wouldn’t outlast it.

  I loved him. That gave him the power to destroy me. The kind of destruction that I wouldn’t survive.

  I was shaking my head before I knew what I was going to say, what I had to do. “I can’t do this, Zeke. Maybe it’s me. I can’t handle it again. I can’t stand by and… I don’t even know what will happen, but something will happen. To me or to you, and I can’t deal with it. I’m not made of that tough stuff people seem to need to thrive in the world. I don’t have it, and what’s worse, I don’t know if I want it. If I have to blackmail someone or break into someone’s house or set someone’s car on fire—I don’t have that in me to hurt another person. Whether they’re good or bad, or if they deserve it or not. I just don’t have it. Consider me weak, if that’s how you perceive it. I just don’t have it in me, that’s all I know.”

  “Ava,” he spoke, softly.

  That made it hurt, but I was already hurting. I’d be hurting for a long time. I knew that, but this way, I can still stand. I wouldn’t be able to stand whenever my world would shatter, and this was my life. Of course, it’d shatter.

  I was getting out before it happened. It’s the only way I could survive this.

  I’d run out of words and there didn’t seem to be anything else to say. I’d made up my mind except, I looked at him. “I can’t do this with you. I’m sorry.” I left, sliding out of the Jeep and somehow, I made it to my own vehicle.

  I drove away, not having a destination in mind.

  I just needed to go away.

  25

  AVA

  I went to my mom’s place, and she opened the door, wheeling back and stared up at me.

  I shrugged. “What? You’ve never seen me wrecked before?”

  She only pressed her lips together before jerking her head. “Come in. And I’m not saying this to be a mean mama, because I’ll always have time for my daughter, but I’m getting picked up for movie night tonight.” She motioned with her wrist. “Let’s hurry this along.”

  I grunted, rolling my eyes, but went to the kitchen table and sat.

  She zoomed in, going to the fridge and grabbing a beer for both of us before closing the door, and grabbing a bowl of popcorn she already had on the counter. She came back, hitting one lock on her chair before handing the beer over. The bowl went on the table between us. “Okay. I’m here for you, daughter of mine.” She patted my arm before opening her beer and tipping it back for a sip. “Spill. What’d your new man do?”

  I gave her a look. “You don’t have to sound so brisk about this.”

  She gave me a look right back. “I love you, but your grandma left us both explicit directions that we’re supposed to live life to the fullest. I’m living and you’re living, and you’re really living. Got a hot new and well-off man, but you’re here moping. You’re moping at my kitchen table. I know you enough to know something happened with your man. Let’s hear it out. Tell me. Come on.” She made a waving motion with her hands before grabbing some popcorn.

  She really was hurrying this along, and I gave her a whole different onceover.

  Her hair was freshly cut, and cleaned, and shining. There was gel in it, giving it extra volume. She had makeup. Not a lot, but a little, enough to give her some extra shine there too. And she was wearing a skirt, along with a white frilly top.

  I shoved back my chair, gaping at her. “You have a date.”

  She looked away, scratching the back of her neck before she grabbed more popcorn. “I do not.”

  “You do too. You’re dressed up.”

  “I am no—”

  “You have makeup on!” I pointed at it. “And lipstick. You have lipstick on.”

  “I—”

  “You said it’s a movie night. Is this a group thing?”

  “Yes. There will be a bunch of people there.”

  “That means you like someone in the group. Who do you like?”

  “Oh—stop it, Ava. Tell me what happened between you and Zeke—”

  “Who is it?”

  “Sweethear—”

  “Tell me who it is, and I’ll tell you what happened with Zeke.”

  She opened her mouth, gaping at me, before sighing and cursing under her breath. She reached for another sip of her beer. “Sophie.”

  “Sophi—” I knew Sophie. She was a friend of one of the other ladies in the building. “Sophie’s a woman, Mom.”

  She grunted. “I’m well aware, and I like her.” She was eyeing me. She was really eyeing me. “I like her a lot, Ava.”

  I held her gaze, and I was quiet for a beat because this was something major. Like uber super-duper major. My mom had never expressed that she was attracted to a woman before. Then again, my mom had never expressed she was interested or attracted to anyone, not even my father now that I was thinking about it. Except Charlie Hunnam. We both shared our delight in him from Sons of Anarchy.

  “Mom—” I started, going gentle.

  She cursed, wheeling back and staring at me head on. “I like Sophie. That’s it. Since you showed up, I felt it was time to tell you. That’s all I want to say about it.”

  “Okay, but—”

  “Ava!”

  “Mom.” I laid my hand over her arm because this was important. This was suddenly so extremely and very important and I needed her to hear me say my part.

  She stilled but cursed and looked away.

  She was two seconds away from letting a tear come out. I knew my mom. I knew the signs.

  “I need you to hear me. Just in case you need to hear this. I will always love you—”

  “Oh, good God. I know you’ll always love me.” But her voice was a little shaky, and she reached for my hand, entwining our fingers. “Thank you.” She squeezed my hand again. “Thank you.”

  I sat there, and there was a whole burst of emotions going on in me.

  I had no clue what to do here because this wasn’t about me. This was about her, so… well, screw it. I was going with what felt right to say.

  “Mom.”

  She groaned. “Ava. Stop. It’s—it’s fine. You can leave it alone.”

  “I love you, Mom.”

  She looked away but tipped her head up. That meant she was listening to me, listening to every word I was going to say.

  “You’re my mother. I feel weird saying ‘’I still love you’ because that means that something might’ve happened where I might not love you and that’ll never happen. Ever. So instead, I’m going to say that I have always loved you. I have always needed you. I have always depended on you, and nothing will change that. Nothing. The main thing I care about right now is that I want to know how long you’ve liked her? Because if you’ve had a crush developing on her, I’m a little pissed that I didn’t figure it out before you told me.”

  She was smiling and those tears were still there, but she shook her head. “How’d I luck out getting you as a daughter?”

  “Lucked out? What are you talking about?” I asked softly right back, smiling tenderly. “You’re the one who raised me, Mama. I’m all you.”

  She kept smiling and kept blinking her eyes at the same time. “Are you going to tell me what happened between you and Zeke?”

  “I’d like to know more about you and Sophie.”

  She barked out a laugh, before shaking her head. “I don’t know about me and Sophie. I know I like her. I know she makes me smile. I know I want to hold her hand, and I know I want to kiss her. That’s what I know. That’s all I know right now. Your turn. What’s going on with you and Zeke?”

  Oh, boy.

  I let out a soft sigh because in a way, it was the same. Except, “I’m in love with him.”

  “Oh, honey.” She leaned in, cupping the side of my face. “Why are you saying that like it’s a bad thing?”