“It’s just a peacock,” he said.

  “It is more than that to me,” I said. “This bird is beauty itself. It has inhabited my imagination for as long as I can remember. It was the first thing I embroidered and became my obsession. I have stitched its feathers thousands of times, but that was all mere imitation now that I see one for myself. No piece of art could ever be as lovely.”

  “You know, that bird is a boy,” he said.

  “How do you know?” I asked.

  “Because only male peacocks are beautiful. The females are very plain. There is one,” he said pointing to a gray bird across the grass.

  “Fascinating,” I said, watching the two.

  The prince crouched down beside me. He took my hand and held it out flat toward the male peacock. He pulled up a few blades of grass and sprinkled them into my hand.

  Slowly and cautiously, the gorgeous blue peacock came toward me. He pecked at the ground and then tilted his head to look at me closely. He took a few more steps and then pecked at the grass in my hand! I gasped and instinctively pulled my hand back from the little pecks. The prince continued to hold my hand and encouraged me to reach my hand out again. The peacock pecked at my hand again, grabbing a few blades of grass. I felt like I was in a fairyland. I looked up at the prince with a wide smile.

  “Thank you,” I said.

  He smiled back, delighted by my childish happiness.

  * * *

  We finally came to the gate of a palace called the Palace for Gathering Elegance.

  “This is where Imperial Concubine Yi lives,” the prince explained. “Wait here.” The prince entered the gate and crossed the courtyard. He approached a well-dressed woman who was sitting on the porch. She ducked inside the palace. After a moment, a eunuch appeared and he and the prince joined me outside the gate.

  “This is the only eunuch you ever need to worry about,” the prince said. “His name is An Dehai, Imperial Concubine Yi’s chief eunuch.”

  “You honor me, Your Highness,” An Dehai replied. “But there are far more lofty servants of the emperor than me within these walls.”

  “But none with Concubine Yi’s ear,” the prince said. “This is Yang Yaqian, the new embroidery girl.”

  “Yes,” An Dehai replied. “I know who she is. The inventor of the double-sided embroidery with the bound feet.”

  “He knows everything,” the prince said, smiling.

  “What do you want from me?” An Dehai asked.

  “In the short term, get her situated. Find her room. Find her lunch. Explain basic court manners to her.”

  “And in the long term?” An Dehai asked.

  “I’m sure you can figure that out,” the prince said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out far more than the two coins I had given Eunuch Shun and gave them to An Dehai.

  An Dehai put the coins into his pocket. He sighed as if he was annoyed with the burden of having one more thing to do.

  “Very well, girl. Follow me,” he said. He opened the gate and went inside. I followed after him. As he turned to close the gate, I looked back to say goodbye to the prince and thank him for his help, but he was already walking away without even a glance behind him.

  An Dehai led me past Imperial Concubine Yi’s palace, which was made up of several smaller buildings, and down a narrow walkway. The walkway was lined with windows and doors. Apparently, these were the servants’ barracks, and as the newcomer, I was the lowest servant of them all. An Dehai finally stopped at the very last room and opened the door. The room was quite small. It had a bed about the size of my bed at Lady Tang’s school. There was a fireplace in one wall and a chair by the window, which had a lattice screen. My trunk was already there next to the bed. The room was coated with dust and spider webs dangled from the ceiling. Because of the covering over the walkway, there was very little sunlight streaming into the room. It would be nearly impossible to do any embroidery work in such a dark and cramped space.

  “What a fine room,” I lied. I had imagined that palace quarters would be the best of the best, even for lowly servants. “I never had a room of my own before.” At least that much was the truth. “And how convenient that my trunk has already arrived. How efficient the emperor’s household is.”

  An Dehai rolled his eyes, as if annoyed by my praise.

  “You must keep your room neat and attend your own fire,” he said. “You are to report to Imperial Concubine Yi every morning at the hour of the rabbit to receive any orders for the day. Your meals will be whatever is left over from Concubine Yi’s table after her ladies have eaten. Just follow the other servants to see how things are done.”

  “And where will I work?” I asked. “And how will I get supplies? Thread, needles, rolls of silk?”

  “You will come to me for all your needs,” he said. “And you will work in Concubine Yi’s main hall. You will attend her as soon as she wakes and remain in her presence unless she gives you leave to do otherwise.”

  I nodded. I stepped out of the room and noticed a water pump. I remembered that I still must have looked quite a fright. And my room needed to be cleaned and aired out. “Do you think Imperial Concubine Yi will need me this afternoon? Or can I use the day to clean and get organized?”

  An Dehai stepped out of the room as well. “I know you have had a long journey,” he said. “Rest and make yourself ready. Your new life will start bright and early tomorrow.”

  9

  The Forbidden City, 1856-1857

  The next morning, I was up before dawn. I hardly slept a wink the night before. I put on my best satin robe and embroidered slippers. I pinned up my hair and wore a little color on my lips and cheeks. By the time the front door to Imperial Concubine Yi’s palace opened at exactly the hour of the rabbit, I was waiting to greet her.

  I have no idea how early Concubine Yi woke up, but she already looked perfect. Her hair was magnificently piled on top of her head and her makeup was done in the Manchu style, with her eyes lined with black ink and her lips small and red. She was already seated at her dining table, which was covered with no less than one hundred dishes! No wonder all of her ladies and servants would be able to eat after she was done. There was enough food at this one meal for an army. Concubine Yi was seated at the head of the table and all her attending ladies lined each side, all standing. I stood at the far end of the table, but she saw me.

  “Yang Yaqian!” she called. “Come down here!”

  I shuffled down to her end of the table, sure to keep my eyes downcast. The other ladies all moved down so I could stand in the first spot.

  “How kind of you to finally join me,” she said. “I expected you to present yourself to me last night.”

  I gasped and looked around. Damn that An Dehai! “Forgive me, Your Highness,” I said. “I was told to attend you in the morning. I didn’t want to interrupt your normal routine.”

  “I wish I had a normal routine,” she said. “But something always comes up. Well, it is no matter. You are here now.” Imperial Concubine Yi didn’t address me for the rest of her meal, which took more than an hour. We stood there while she ate and read letters. Standing for such a long period of time was very painful on my little feet, but I didn’t squirm or fidget.

  Eventually, Concubine Yi finished eating. She turned to me and asked, “Isn’t it painful for you to stand for so long?”

  “Yes, My Lady,” I replied.

  “You should unbind your feet,” she said bluntly. “It’s a terrible and cruel practice. And I need you at your best. I can’t have you distracted by such pain.”

  “They have never impeded my work before, My Lady,” I said. “But if the emperor orders it, I will unbind them, if someone will tell me how.”

  “The emperor gave you to me,” she said. “You should do as I tell you.”

  “Yes, My Lady,” I said.

  She stood to leave the room. The ladies then grabbed what they could and quickly ate as they followed her. After they left, several servants and eunuchs who had been standing to the sides or in other rooms emerged and picked at the food. I grabbed a few steamed buns since they would be easy to eat without a bowl and I could put some in my pockets for later. Then I also followed the other ladies.

  I wasn’t sure what I should do. Did she just order me to unbind my feet? The emperor had told me to keep them bound. What would happen if I defied him? What would happen if I disobeyed Concubine Yi?

  Concubine Yi went to her main hall, where there was now plenty of light from the morning sun. She sat in a large chair in the middle of the room and motioned for her ladies to also sit. I remained standing. She eventually took notice of me and motioned for me to sit on a stool near her.

  “Everyone can embroider,” she said to me.

  I nodded. “It is an important skill for a woman,” I said.

  “I embroider some of the emperor’s clothes and I make little shoes for my darling baby prince. And my ladies embroider lovely scarves and handkerchiefs for me.”

  I looked around and nodded to the ladies. Indeed, some of them were already settling down with their needlework.

  “I have never had a girl work for me whose only job was to embroider. What will you do for me?” she asked.

  “I will do whatever you ask of me,” I replied. “I can embroider whatever you need or want. I can teach your ladies how to improve their embroidery. And if you have no needs of me, I can improve my skills so one day I can be a great master.”

  “Usually if I need anything special I just send for it from Suzhou and it comes in a few days. Like this chaopao I am wearing now. Isn’t it lovely? I especially requested the little white flowers. I asked for it special and it arrived within a week. Would you be able to make a new outfit for me in a week?”

  I shook my head and looked closely at the chaopao she was wearing before responding. “My Lady, this garment is quite lovely. But my understanding of the embroidery work done in Suzhou is that it is a factory. They have hundreds of people working night and day for you. I am only one person. This piece you are wearing was not done by only one person, but probably four or five. And none of them spent much time on it.”

  “How can you tell?” she asked.

  I pointed to one flower on her front panel. “See here, the person who did this one is highly skilled. But if you look at this panel on the side, under your arm where you cannot easily see, the flowers were done much more quickly. The thread is thicker and the flowers were done in haste. I would suspect the ones on the back panel are of even less quality.”

  “Less quality?” she asked, nearly gasping.

  “I believe two master embroiderers worked on the front panels while apprentices of varying degrees worked on the side and back panels. This is how it was cobbled together so quickly.”

  “Cobbled together?” she nearly sputtered. “Well, this won’t do! I simply must have the best. Can you make me one? A new one? A better one?”

  “It will take time, My Lady,” I said. “This chaopao is lovely, and I am sure most people would not think it was anything but the best. But I guarantee that after seeing a chaopao made by me, even following the same pattern, you would clearly see an improvement.”

  She nodded and called for An Dehai, who appeared almost instantly. “Make sure Yaqian has whatever she needs to make me a beautiful new outfit. I feel as though I am wearing rags now.”

  An Dehai nodded and left the room. Concubine Yi turned her attention from me and talked to her ladies about a new opera performance she was planning for the emperor. About an hour later, An Dehai returned with a whole basket of supplies for me: dark blue satin for the base, white silk threads of various shades, and needles of every size. I moved a chair over by the front door and began to work in the bright sunshine of the clear Peking sky.

  That night, as I unbound my feet to wash them as usual, I pondered not wrapping them up again. I remembered the freedom I felt as I ran through the silkworm fields. When I was little, I was sure I could never live with bound feet. Now, I could not imagine them unbound. I soaked them in hot water for a long time. After, I did not bind them, but tried to stand on them without any wrappings. I could not put any weight on them. I could not stand, much less walk. It was as if without the bindings, my feet had nothing holding the bones together and my feet would shatter if any weight was put on them. I didn’t know what to do. On our journey from Changsha, Prince Gong mentioned that Concubine Yi had in the past ordered women with bound feet to unbind them. It must be possible, but I had no idea how to go about it.

  I sent for An Dehai and explained the situation to him, that Concubine Yi had ordered me to unbind my feet but I did not know how. I asked him he could send someone to help me.

  But no one came. I had no choice but to wrap my feet in the bindings the next morning so I could attend Concubine Yi. She did not remark on my feet and the subject was not broached again. My feet remained bound.

  * * *

  After a few days, I was settling into my new life. Imperial Concubine Yi was very excited about getting her first robe made by me, so while the other ladies had to attend her from before dawn until late at night – dressing her, entertaining her, following her around the palace grounds whenever she went somewhere – I was allowed to stay in her main audience chamber and work on her new gown. An Dehai eventually brought me a freestanding frame, so the work was much easier than having to work in a tiny handheld circular frame.

  The other ladies warmed to me eventually. They would often hover over my shoulder to see what I was working on. Sometimes they would question me about my work or ask for tips to improve their own embroidery. They thought it was quite interesting that I grew up in a school instead of at home. Most of Imperial Concubine Yi’s ladies were raised to attend to the court. They were princesses – daughters of other princes and royal cousins – and the daughters of high-ranking grandees. They were raised at home and were taught to clean, cook, sew, paint, play instruments, style their hair, organize a household, and raise children. Some of them were taught to read and write a little, but not much. Apparently, the emperor’s chief wife, Empress Zhen, was the most well-educated woman they knew. She had been raised in a very wealthy family and had private tutors from a young age to teach her history and poetry.

  Imperial Concubine Yi and Empress Zhen got on very well. They would often visit each other and they both doted on the prince, Zaichun. The women seemed to love nothing more than to play with the little prince in the garden, together, every day. It was fascinating to me that two women who shared the same husband and the same child seemed to have no jealousy or strife between them.

  But that is how Empress Zhen was. She was the most calm and cool woman I ever met. She was not as beautiful as Imperial Concubine Yi, but she carried herself with the most exquisite grace. She never raised her voice and never lost her temper. As the empress, her main task was to manage the inner court – the court of the ladies – and she had been the best choice for that. Her restraint and respect radiated throughout the community, so there was very little conflict among any of the women.

  Sometimes Imperial Concubine Yi and Empress Zhen would be summoned to the emperor’s audiences, usually when an important diplomat was visiting. Concubine Yi and Empress Zhen would have to dress up in their finest clothes and bring a large retinue of ladies and eunuchs with them – all for show, of course. Having so many beautiful women and servants at his command was one of the ways the emperor showed his power. On more than one occasion, Imperial Concubine Yi would include me among the ladies who were to attend her.

  The audiences were mostly boring, but it did give us a chance to hear about what was going on around the country, and a chance to steal glances at some of the men. I always kept a look out for Prince Gong, but he was not always there.

  At one particular audience, the prince was present, and my heart leaped. Even I was surprised by how excited I was to see him. At one point, he looked my way, and our eyes met. It was only for a moment, and I don’t think anyone else noticed, but in that second we spoke without words. He wanted to see me.

  After the audience was over, of which I hadn’t heard a thing, I made sure I was the last of the ladies to leave, and I walked slowly so I would fall back. I couldn’t linger in the outer court, I would surely be missed or caught, but I was hoping to at least catch a glimpse of the prince again. As I passed a large column, I felt a hand reach out and grab my arm. I looked up and saw Prince Gong, his finger to his lips. He pulled me aside.

  “How is life in the inner court?” he asked me in hushed tones.

  “It is wonderful!” I said. “Imperial Concubine Yi is a kind mistress, and I love my work. Thank you so much for bringing me here.”

  “No one has tried to bother you or cause you any trouble?”

  “No. I don’t think so. Everyone has been so kind. Oh, well, An Dehai tried to embarrass me the first day I think, by telling me I didn’t have to appear before Concubine Yi when she expected me to. But she wasn’t too mad. I’m sure she has forgotten all about it.”

  “I hope so,” he said.

  “Concubine Yi ordered me to unbind my feet,” I said. “I tried, but I did not know how. I asked An Dehai to find someone to help me, but he never sent anyone. And Concubine Yi never mentioned it again. I hope I have not disappointed her.”

  The prince shook his head. “The emperor heard of Yi’s order. He was displeased that she would contradict him. He told her to leave the matter of your feet alone.”

  “I hope I have not caused strife between the emperor and Concubine Yi,” I said.

  “Don’t worry about her,” he said. “But if anyone tries to hurt you or cause you problems, I want you to tell me.”

  My heart jumped again and I could feel my cheeks go hot. “Why do you care?” I asked.

  The prince smiled and pinched my nose. “You are a little fool, you know that?”