“I only thought the guy needed it more. I had other watches.”

  “But you liked that watch. And you bought it with your own money. You had a right to keep it. It made me so angry to think you thought you didn’t, that you were such a good guy but you couldn’t see how good you were. Maybe it’s because your two older brothers were smarter or better at sports or whatever, or maybe it’s just because you were the youngest, but I felt like you always thought of yourself as someone who wasn’t as good as they were, someone who wasn’t good enough.”

  That’s what Joel felt? He never told me.

  He pats my shoulder. “So yeah, maybe that woman you were seeing felt the same way. Maybe she got angry because to her, you’re special and you’re this wonderful guy, but you don’t see it.”

  “Actually, she got angry because she felt like I always put her last.”

  “Because she puts you first and you put yourself last,” Joel says.

  I sigh. “So I’m supposed to be more selfish in order for her to want to stay with me? That’s ridiculous.”

  “You’re supposed to put her first,” Joel tells me. “Always. That’s what I do.”

  I know he does.

  “But doesn’t that annoy Natalie sometimes?” I ask him. “When you always ask for her opinion?”

  Joel nods. “You have a point. Maybe it’s best to take turns making decisions, or to decide together, but you definitely shouldn’t let anyone else decide what the two of you should do.”

  He turns back to the mirror.

  “I think I’ll stick with this black necktie. You, my friend, should make up your mind about how badly you want to be with this woman, because if you want to be with her badly, you’ll be the man she wants you to be. And if she’s a good woman, which I think she is, that means you’re going to be a better man.”

  He pats my shoulder.

  “Good luck.”

  Then he peeks into the back of the shop.

  “Um, excuse me. You can come back now.”

  The tailor returns. I go back on the podium so he can finish his job. As he does, I think about what Joel just said.

  How badly do I want to be with Claire?

  Badly, I realize. But can I be the man she wants me to be?

  I stare at my reflection in the mirror. What kind of man do I want to be?

  The answer is right in front of me—Ryker Hawthorne. My own man. My own person.

  I don’t want to be Ethan’s puppy or anyone’s puppy. I don’t want to live anyone else’s life. I want my own.

  I want to look in the mirror and be able to recognize myself instead of wonder who I am. I want to be proud of what I see. I want my reflection to be smiling.

  I want to be the head of Hawthorne Foundation. And I want to be with Claire.

  Slowly, the lips in the mirror curve into a smile.

  I know what I have to do.

  ~

  I knock on the door to Ethan’s office.

  “Come in,” he says.

  So I step inside. Ethan is sitting behind his desk. He looks up from his computer and his eyebrows arch when he sees me.

  “Ryker.” He leans back in his chair. “When is your flight to Jamaica?”

  “Tomorrow afternoon,” I answer.

  “Is there something I can do for you?”

  “Actually, there is.”

  I hand him the folder beneath my arm.

  He gives me a puzzled look as he receives it. “What’s this?”

  “Just take a look at it.”

  He opens the folder. I fidget with my tie as he goes through the papers. I hold my breath as I wait for his feedback.

  I’ve taken the first step to making my dream come true. Now, it’s up to Ethan.

  He puts the folder down on his desk.

  This is it. Moment of truth.

  “You don’t want to be in business anymore?” Ethan asks me.

  “No,” I answer. “Frankly, I’m not sure I ever wanted to be. I’m not saying I don’t like it here or that I regret being here. I’ve learned so much in the past seven years. But I think I came here because it was the easiest place to be. You know how I used to follow you around? I think I ended up following you here. And now, I realize I don’t want to do that anymore.”

  Ethan nods. “I see.”

  “I’m not quitting the corporate world entirely. I just want to be on the philanthropic side. I want to give away money, not make money. I want to make sure that the money you and Asher work hard to bring in is put to good use. I want to use it to help transform this world into a better place.”

  Ethan falls silent. He taps his fingers on the folder.

  What is he thinking? Is he mad? Is he looking for a reason to turn down my request?

  “I know establishing the Hawthorne Foundation isn’t going to be easy, but frankly, it’s an idea we should have thought of before.”

  “We did,” Ethan says. “Actually, Dad said Mom was thinking about it a lot before she died.”

  She was?

  “Maybe she wants you to be the one to do it.”

  “But you don’t think I should?”

  “Actually…” He gets up from his chair and walks around his desk towards me. “I can’t think of a better person for it.”

  My eyes grow wide. “You mean it?”

  Ethan nods. “I’ll tell the Board about this and Dad, too. I’ll make sure everyone gets on board before I take my leave.”

  My jaw drops as joy fills my chest. I go over to him and give him a hug.

  “Thank you.”

  Ethan pats my back and shakes his head. “No need to thank me. I may be your boss, but I’m also your big brother, and it’s my job to look after you and make sure you get the life you want.”

  “Still, thank you,” I tell him. “And I’m sorry that I have to go back on what I said about helping Asher run the company while you’re not here.”

  “Don’t be. Asher will be fine. He’s been more reliable since Violet showed up.” He places a hand on my shoulder. “You just go and be happy.”

  I nod and turn to leave.

  “Ryker?”

  I turn back to face Ethan. “Yes?”

  “I’m proud of you. Asher and I and Dad all are.”

  Pride floods my chest, filling the void left by the weight of people’s expectations that somehow just disappeared. I smile.

  “Thanks, big brother.”

  “Take care, little brother,” he says. “And have fun in Jamaica.”

  “I will.”

  I walk out of his office with my smile intact. I feel like a new man, a free man. I feel like a man with a purpose. And it’s all because of Claire.

  I’m going to Jamaica to get her back.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Claire

  “You’re here!” Natalie throws herself into Joel’s arms as he appears on the beach. “You’re finally here.”

  “Yup.” Joel hugs her tight. “And I’m ready to get married.”

  They kiss. I start to walk away so I can leave them alone.

  “Hey!” Joel calls after me. “Aren’t you going to say hello to your brother?”

  “Hello,” I tell him without much enthusiasm.

  Truth be told, I don’t have much enthusiasm for this wedding or for anything else lately. Not since Ryker and I broke up.

  “Just leave her alone,” Natalie tells Joel. “She’s tired.”

  I am tired. Tired of hurting, and yet I can’t seem to find a way to make it stop.

  “Okay,” Joel says.

  “Is Ryker with you?” Natalie asks him.

  Just at the mention of his name, my heart stops. Why? Why can’t I forget about him?

  “Yes. He went to his cottage.”

  So he came. I was afraid he wouldn’t come. And then there was a part of me that hoped he wouldn’t so I didn’t have to see him.

  Natalie wraps her arm around Joel’s waist. “You want to see ours?”

  “Sure.”

  Joel puts his arm around Natalie’s shoulder and they walk away, leaving me alone on the beach. Alone.

  I walk along the shore.

  Here I am on this beautiful beach where the sun has just set and the sand is soft beneath my feet and the breeze is blowing through my hair. And I’m all alone.

  Natalie has Joel. The other women I’ve seen have their own men to kiss and swim with and walk on the beach with. And I’m all alone.

  I’m starting to wonder if maybe I’m going to be alone all my life.

  The loneliness makes me consider going to Ryker’s cottage to talk. Who knows? Maybe we can still get back together. Maybe we just misunderstood each other. Maybe he loves me after all.

  But no. I shake my head. I left Ryker behind. If he wants me, he has to come after me and take me back and never let me go.

  I look at the purple sky and sigh.

  I keep walking down the beach. Sighing. Longing. I pass by the tent where Natalie and I got a massage yesterday.

  That felt good. But it would have felt even better if I had it with Ryker. A couple’s massage.

  I stop and slap my forehead.

  Oh, stop thinking about Ryker already. He doesn’t love you, remember? He doesn’t want you. He’s just a disappointing coward who can’t—

  Suddenly, a hand grabs my arm. The next thing I know I’m being pulled inside the tent. I find Ryker standing in front of me.

  Whoa. Ryker? I thought he was in his cottage. I’m not imagining things, am I?

  I don’t think so. I can still remember the smell of Ryker’s sweat, and this is it. Besides, I don’t think an imaginary Ryker could make my heart beat this fast.

  I pull my arm away. “What on earth are you doing? Are you trying to scare me to death?”

  “Sorry,” he says. “I just wanted us to talk. In private.”

  “So what? You’ve been waiting to ambush me the whole time?”

  “I saw you on the beach and then I saw the tent. I paid to borrow it for an hour.”

  “Well, enjoy your tent.”

  I start to head out. Again, Ryker grabs my arm. I glare at him over my shoulder.

  “Please hear me out.”

  What am I doing running away from him when I’ve been wanting to see him? I said I wanted him to come after me and take me back, didn’t I? I should let him try.

  “Fine,” I say. “You wanted to talk? So talk.”

  Ryker lets go of my arm.

  “First of all, I’m glad to see you.”

  I cross my arms over my chest. “Really? Because you didn’t come to see me in Chicago.”

  He ignores me.

  “Second and more importantly, I want you to know that I’ve told Ethan about the Hawthorne Foundation.”

  My eyes grow wide. He didn’t.

  “He said it was a good idea, one my mother had but which had gotten put off indefinitely when she died.”

  No way.

  “And he said he was going to make sure it happens. Of course, I’m going to be the head of it, and I’m going to help all the people I said I would.”

  I still can’t believe it.

  “You’re not saying all that just to get me back, are you?” I ask him.

  “I did do all this to get you back,” Ryker says.

  He did? He went and talked to his brother for me?

  “You really talked to Ethan?” I ask him.

  Ryker nods. “But if you don’t believe me, you can call him yourself. You can use my phone.”

  I shake my head. “It’s not that I don’t believe you. It’s just… I’m finding all this so hard to believe because your mind was made up about helping him run the company.”

  “Asher can do it like you said,” he tells me.

  But I thought he said Asher couldn’t’ do it on his own.

  “Ethan will be with his family, Asher will run the company, and you and I will be traveling and helping people.”

  We’ll be traveling together and making the world a better place? It sounds too good to be true. Can it be true?

  “They’re not just plans now. Not just wishful thinking. We are going to do it. Together.” Ryker takes my hand. “You were right, Claire. You have always been right. I should have put us first from the start. I’m putting us first.”

  Oh my God.

  “That’s why I’m going to tell Joel about us right now.”

  What?

  He starts to walk towards the entrance of the tent. I grab his arm.

  “Wait.”

  He stops and glances over his shoulder.

  “Right now?” I ask him.

  “I’ve put this off long enough,” Ryker answers. “Besides, he was the one who urged me to take you back, to put you first, to be a better man for you.”

  My eyebrows furrow. “He said that?”

  “Well, he didn’t mean you. He meant the woman I was sleeping with. I told him I broke up with her.”

  I grin. “He told you to get back together with the woman you were sleeping with, not knowing she was me.”

  I can just imagine the look on his face when he realizes that.

  “Yes. So I’m just following his advice.” He plants a quick kiss on my cheek. “Wish me luck.”

  I don’t let go of his arm.

  “What about the wedding?”

  “If Natalie and Joel don’t want me at their wedding anymore, that’s their decision. If Joel can be happy without me, good for him. In fact, I hope he can be. But his happiness isn’t up to you or me. Our happiness is only up to us, and I’m claiming mine.”

  Those last several words are what I’ve been longing to hear. I can’t believe Ryker is finally saying them.

  “So, I’ll see you later?” he asks me.

  “Before that…”

  I pull him close to me and kiss him. I’ve been wanting to do it since he first dragged me inside this tent.

  Ryker kisses me back and warmth floods my chest. His hand strokes my cheek.

  I part my lips and he does the same. Our tongues collide and I shiver. I rub mine against his as I place my hand on his arm. His other hand grips my waist and pulls me closer.

  I pull my mouth away. “Didn’t you say you rented this tent for an hour?”

  “Yes. Why?”

  I grin. “You know why.”

  I kiss him again. His hand wanders across my back as his tongue mingles with mine.

  He pulls away. “I thought we were going to tell Joel.”

  “We can tell him afterwards,” I say.

  Because right now, the thing I want most in the world is him. Doesn’t he feel the same?

  “Or are you trying to tell me you didn’t miss me?” I ask him.

  Ryker plants a kiss on my forehead. “I’ve missed you.”

  And another kiss on the tip of my nose.

  “I’ve missed you.”

  And another on my neck.

  “God, I’ve missed you.”

  He captures my lips as he grips my waist. I bring my arms up around his head to play with his hair as I surrender my mouth to his.

  God, I’ve missed him, too.

  He tugs at the sash of my dress. It opens to reveal the bikini I’m wearing—a bandeau halter top and panties with a ribbon tied around one hip, all black.

  Ryker stares at it. “Did you swim earlier today?”

  “No,” I answer. “But you never know when I might think of going into the water.”

  Actually, I didn’t feel like swimming. I just felt like wearing the swimsuit, and now I’m glad I did.

  Ryker kisses me again. He lowers me onto the bed and I lie on it. I pull him on top of me and mess his hair. Then I slide my hands to the front of his shirt to undo the buttons.

  I’ve only managed to undo three when he moves his mouth to my neck. I drop my arms to my sides and surrender to the pleasure.

  As Ryker licks the other side of my neck, his hand slips beneath my top. His fingers find my nipple and I gasp.

  “Shh.” Ryker holds a finger over my lips. “Someone might hear you.”

  I blush as I realize he’s right. We’re in a tent on the beach. Sure, it’s a private beach, but any of the guests could walk by and hear me. Any of them could just walk in.

  Fine. I’ll be quiet. But for that to happen, I need something inside my mouth.

  I grab his wrist and push his index finger inside my mouth so I can suck it. He adds the middle finger. I get them wet as his tongue draws circles around my nipple. His lips leave my stomach tingling with kisses.

  Then he pulls his fingers away. He turns me around and I go on my hands and knees on top of the bed. His hand slips beneath my underwear and I hold my breath. His fingers, the very fingers I just sucked, push inside me and I gasp.

  I fold my arms in front of me and rest my face on them, muffling my moans with my own skin, as Ryker’s fingers thrust into me from behind. His other hand reaches around me to stroke my nub from the front and my whole body trembles.

  I feel like a violin being played by Ryker’s skillful hands. Every stroke sends me shuddering, moaning. Pleasure hums in my veins and vibrates throughout every inch of my skin to create a melody which engulfs me. It’s maddening, and yet I can’t get enough of it. I move my hips and dance.

  When Ryker pulls his hands away, I whimper. I haven’t even climaxed once yet.

  But then I hear the rustle of clothing behind me and my frustration vanishes. I turn around.

  Ryker takes his cock out of his briefs. Every inch is just as I remember. Unable to resist, I wrap my fingers around it and lick the shaft. Ryker draws a sharp breath.

  He lets me suck on it a few times before pushing me away. I lie back on the bed and remove my panties. Then I spread my legs as I watch him put the rubber on his cock.

  He climbs on top of me and presses his lips against mine. Then he grips my thighs.

  “Here I come.”

  He pushes his cock slowly inside me. I can tell he’s being careful. Why? Because we haven’t had sex in a while?

  I don’t care. He’s made me thoroughly wet and wanting.

  So I push my hips against his. He grunts and grins.

  “Oh, what am I going to do with you?”

  “Fuck me,” I tell him. “Fuck me and make me yours. And never let me go.”

  He replies with a fierce kiss. Then he enters me with one thrust. His lips muffle my cry.

  He swallows my moans as his cock moves in and out of me, the exquisite friction igniting flames of pleasure that consume me from the inside out. Then he pulls away.