“I think there’s more beauty in imperfection than perfect things,” he says earnestly, our gazes still locked. “I can spot flaws and things I could improve in every single piece I’ve ever made. But they make the pieces unique. The blemishes and faults tell the story of the piece and all the work I’ve put in to complete it.”

  “I’d love to see your work and watch you on the wheel.”

  “You should come down to the studio. I can give you a demo and you can have a go if you like. We could go for lunch afterwards?” His tone is hopeful.

  I can picture everything he’s suggesting. How fun it would be to learn from him. How wonderfully normal it would be to go to lunch together and chat, just like we are today.

  “I’d like that,” I tell him, unable to hold back my joy-filled grin.

  “You’d have to leave your perfectionism at the door though,” he warns with an amused tone. “If I held myself to ridiculously high standards, I would never finish anything. And I’d love for you to end up with your own completed piece of pottery.”

  “I can try. And I’d love to learn from you.” Hope sits lightly on my shoulders at the thought of more.

  “I better head off. I need to get some stuff sorted before my shift. But let’s make a date to do it soon, yeah?”

  And with that, he’s gone.

  While I’m still sitting there, a stupid grin on my face, daydreaming about a date with Alex, I reopen the Instagram app and before I can question it, hit follow on his account. With that many followers, perhaps he won’t even notice my name.

  “So, have you given in yet and fucked him again or what?” is Cassidy’s greeting as I open the door to her a few days later.

  “Cassidy!” I admonish, but she’s remorseless, tilting her head to the side and waiting for my response. “No, I haven’t, and thanks for checking if my son was here to overhear before you speak.”

  She has the good sense to look guilty as she cringes. “Sorry, Mel,” she whispers.

  “It’s fine. He’s out, thank goodness.”

  “I forget that you’re a bigger grown up than me with a full-grown kid and everything.”

  “Me too, sometimes.” I grimace and show her through to the lounge. I grab her coat and hang it in the cupboard before there’s another knock at the door.

  “Hey, Mel.” Abby is full of beans when I open it. She steps in carrying a bag in one hand and I hear the clang of glass as she hugs me.

  “I said you didn’t need to bring anything.”

  “I know, but I had a bottle of rosé already chilling in the fridge, so I thought I’d bring it.”

  I raise my brows at her. “I didn’t have you down as a rosé drinker.”

  “I’ll try anything once and more often if I enjoy it.” She gives me a saucy grin. “I recommend it. It’s a good way to live your life.”

  I’m leading her through to the lounge now and Cassidy looks over her shoulder where she’s standing in front of my massive bookshelf.

  “What’s a good way to live your life?”

  “Trying anything, or anyone, once. And if it’s good, you go back for more.”

  Cassidy lets loose a husky giggle, her eyes sliding to mine in amusement.

  “I don’t know what I was thinking when I told you two that I’d slept with him.”

  “You were doing your good friend duty of sharing tales of good dick. That’s what makes a friendship and you know it.” Abby pats me on the shoulder as she squeezes past to join Cassidy in front of the books. “Fucking hell, Mel, this is a huge amount of books.”

  “It sure is, and I am super impressed with the ratio of porn to classic literature,” Cassidy says, her hands brushing along the shelves as she checks the titles and authors.

  “I can’t help it. I think it’s an addiction. Especially with the special editions and bonus scenes.”

  “I really need to release more of my backlist as special editions,” Cassidy says.

  “So what kind of ratio have we got here? Of porn to literature?” Abby asks.

  “Oooh, I reckon 80/20.” Cassidy lets out a breath.

  “Only twenty per cent porn? I expected more from you, Mel.” Abby shoots me a look of disappointment.

  “Oh no, the other way,” Cassidy answers. “Eighty per cent pure unadulterated smut. I’m proud to be your friend, Mel.” She has a massive grin on her face and we all chuckle together.

  “What’s a divorcee to do? Gotta get my kicks somewhere,” I joke and then nearly groan out loud as they turn to face me in perfect synchronisation.

  “Well, there’s somewhere pretty close by where you could get your kicks if you were so inclined,” Abby suggests while Cassidy gives a grave nod of agreement.

  “Do we have to talk about this? You guys already dragged all the dirty details out of me after it happened.”

  “And you can bet on your life that most of that will end up in one of my books, Mel,” Cassidy tells me. “The details were awesome. We are grateful you shared them with us. But tonight it’s about something else…” She pauses, giving Abby some side eye.

  I wait for whatever plan it is they’ve concocted. Abby gives Cassidy a subtle shake of her head before stating, “Wine and book chat, of course. Where are the glasses?”

  Chapter eighteen

  Mel

  We are two bottles of wine down and there’s a huge pile of books in between us where we are sprawled on the softly carpeted floor in front of my precious bookshelves. Cassidy and I have been giving Abby the rundown on tropes and trying to get an idea of her kinks and what she likes to help us make book suggestions.

  “If only there was a quiz I could do to tell me what I’m into,” Abby says with a sigh.

  Cassidy sits up fast from her reclined position. Her wine sloshes up the sides of her glass, nearly spilling on the carpet in her excitement. “Oh, but there is.”

  She grabs up her phone and opens a web browser, seconds later pulling up a kink quiz. “I’m sending this to both of you. You should totally do this, and then we can compare answers.”

  I’m intrigued for sure. “Have you done it?” I ask her.

  “Ah, yep, and Tom and Jack have too. It’s fascinating. Really helped me understand the dynamics of our relationship and where I can push the boundaries in the bedroom.” She waggles her brows. “Please say you’ll do it?”

  My phone buzzes with her message with the link. “What have I got to lose?” I say, looking across to Abby, who’s already opened it and started answering.

  The questions are somewhat confronting and make me realise how vanilla my sex life has been in the past. I’m grateful for my recent experiences with Alex to help me answer them.

  “How do I know if I like this stuff if I haven’t tried it?” I ask.

  “Perhaps think about if you’d want to try, and answer based on that. You could always try a few things, then retake the quiz,” Cassidy suggests.

  Who would I try this stuff with? Alex’s face comes to mind and his eagerness to please. God, we could have some fun working our way through this list. I’d love to see his answers if he took the quiz.

  I answer each question and hit submit at the end. A moment later, my results pop up. I look down the list, eyebrows raising at the answers.

  “What’s your top one?” Cassidy asks excitedly. “I have mine saved. We can compare.”

  “I’m really high on switch and pretty high on vanilla. Vanilla I get.” I blow out a sigh. “But what the hell does switch even mean?”

  “Oooh, a switch… my switch is high too. It means you enjoy switching between being dominant and submissive. Tom, of course, is wholly dominant.” Cassidy has a gleam in her eye. “Oh yeah, and Jack’s brattiness is obviously high.”

  “Huh,” I say, my mouth open.

  “What?” Cassidy quizzes.

  “The first time with Alex, I found myself taking charge. Not completely. But I enjoyed it,” I admit, trying not to think back to that night.

  “You should definitely try it some more then. It makes me feel so powerful. I love it.” She winks at me before saying, “What about you, Abbs?”

  Abby looks up from the screen with a serious look in her eyes. “I’m high on non-monogamy and exhibitionism.”

  “Ooh, you should totally try an orgy in front of a crowd,” Cassidy suggests like it’s nothing.

  “Whose to say I haven’t?” Abby raises her eyebrows.

  Cassidy giggles delightedly. “Well, if you do it again, can I come watch? Purely for book research, of course.”

  “Of course.” Abby gives her a knowing nod.

  “So what are you going to try to see if you like it?” Cassidy asks me.

  “Ummm,” my blush glows on my cheeks, “I’m not sure.” The thought of taking part in an orgy gives me pause for thought. It’s not something I’ve considered before and yet my pulse speeds up. I don’t know what to make of it. I also am surprisingly interested in the idea of watching one. “Maybe some voyeurism,” I tell the girls, expecting a joke or two back. But there are none.

  “An excellent place to start,” Abby declares with a friendly smile on her face.

  And, as the conversation turns back to books, I can’t help but wonder what Alex’s answers to this quiz would be.

  All the talk of sex with the girls has got me decidedly horny. I’ve always enjoyed sex, even though my sex life has been fairly vanilla up until recently. When Alex got on his knees for me in the study, I started thinking about how good it would feel to be in charge. To order someone around. I hadn’t felt confident enough that night with Alex to really push the dominance, but after the quiz results earlier, maybe I should try it.

  I’m lying in bed, naked. I rarely sleep naked. I’m always more comfortable in bed nude, but, as I get cold, I tend to wear pyjamas. But tonight, I decided to slip between the sheets with nothing on, enjoying the fabric gliding over my body. My nipples are stiff peaks, and I can’t stop fidgeting.

  I still have the house to myself. Zack texted hours ago to say he’s staying with a friend tonight.

  I open the drawer beside my bed and dig out the clit suction toy that Cassidy gifted me a while back. I tried it when she first gave it to me. I’d never come as fast in my life as I did when I put the toy to my clit. It felt like someone was licking and blowing simultaneously. That was after a long dry spell, post-marriage break up.

  I turn it on and check the batteries are still working. They are. A shiver rolls through my body in anticipation. I need an orgasm. Perhaps if I let myself do that, then I’ll be able to stop thinking about Alex and the night we shared together.

  I place the toy in the right place and start it on a low setting. My whole body comes alive with sensation and my breath hitches as I slowly work up the settings.

  One setting makes my eyes roll back in my head. Fuck, it’s so good. But all I can think about as it works me towards an orgasm is how much I wish it was Alex between my thighs. It’s the image of him, kneeling before me, licking and sucking me, that drives me over the edge. The orgasm rolls over me and I gasp in surprise as liquid squirts out of me. Alex unlocked something in me when he made me do it.

  I lay panting, coming down from the orgasm. And that’s when I hear the roar of a bike coming down the street. It doesn’t usually wake me, but as I glance at the clock and see how late it is, I realise it’s likely to be Alex. I listen as the bike draws nearer. But it stops before it gets close. I frown, trying to work out what’s happened.

  I get up, grabbing a blanket from the bed to wrap around me. I draw the curtains to the side, but it’s hard to see, so I open them further. And that’s when I see him, walking the bike into the driveway. He pushes the heavy bike over to the side so it’s tucked near the hedge and not easily seen from the road. Once he’s rested it on the kickstand, he reaches up and pulls the helmet off his head. He’s facing away from me and I can’t stop staring as he tilts his head first one way and then the other to stretch his neck.

  He turns around, as if aware that someone is watching him. I freeze, unable to do anything other than stare at him as he looks up at me in the window. I have no idea how long the two of us watch each other. It’s dark out there and hard to see the expression on his face. I cling to the blanket, roughly wrapped around me, breathing fast. My body is still full of awareness from the orgasm I just had thinking about him.

  I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to look away. My teeth gnaw at my lip.

  He reaches for the pocket of his leather biker jacket, unzips it, and pulls something out. A screen lights up and I realise it’s his phone just as a buzzing comes from my bedside table. I walk over and see his name on the screen with an incoming call. I unplug it from where it’s charging and click the answer button, gripping it in one hand.

  “Hello.” I’m breathless, my voice husky.

  “Hey, it’s me. You okay?” he asks.

  “Uh-huh.”

  “I’m sorry if I woke you. I’ve been pushing it the last bit to cut down on the noise.”

  “It’s okay, you didn’t wake me. I was…” I trail off. What do I say?

  “Do you need anything?”

  I close my eyes. I need him. Every part of me yearns for his touch, his warmth. A shiver rattles through me. I draw in a deep breath.

  “Mel? You there?”

  “Yes, I’m here.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “I was just thinking about you. And then you were there. It’s kinda thrown me.” The darkness and the late hour make it easier to be honest, to lay myself open.

  “What do you need, Mel? Do you want me to come in? To come up?”

  “I don’t know. I think so. But I don’t want to regret it tomorrow.”

  “No strings. You can use me for whatever you need. I’ve still got a key. Is it okay if I use it to come in?”

  I move back to the window. He’s still there, standing exactly where he was, looking up at me expectantly.

  “Yes, use the key, Alex. Please,” I tell him.

  “I’ll be right there,” he whispers before hanging up.

  His footsteps are soft as he comes up the stairs. The bedroom door opens wide and there he is, standing in the doorway. The bedside lamp illuminates him like a masterpiece. His nostrils flare as something catches his eye. I follow his gaze and jolt when I see the abandoned toy lying on the sheets. And if he gets close enough to the bed, he’ll discover the wet patch too.

  “Having fun?” he asks, propping himself against the doorframe, arms crossed and one ankle crossed over the other one.

  “Not as much as I had when you were here.” I’m beyond trying to stop this now. I can’t understand why I’ve been denying myself when every part of me wants him, needs him. Perhaps it’s the gentle encouragement from Cassidy and Abby to go for it, to let my hair down. Perhaps it’s the memory of how it was with him buried deep inside me. But I struggle to remember why I decided that I couldn’t give in to this. The doubts have cleared and in their place, there is a burning need for this exquisite man that stands before me.

  I draw a breath and stand tall, pulling every ounce of confidence into that stance. Then I drop the blanket, letting it fall to the floor. I stand, bared to him. I can’t do anything to stop the blush that rages over my whole body, but I don’t let it stop me.

  His eyes work their way up and down as his Adam’s apple dips when he swallows hard.

  “Come here.” I beckon him closer, reaching out a hand. He pulls his jacket off and throws it to the side as he makes his way across the room. And then his shirt comes over his head and is chucked. He must have paused on the way in to remove his boots and socks, as his feet are already bare.

  He’s standing in front of me now. I reach out and unbuckle his jeans.

  “How many?” he asks. I frown, not understanding the question. “How many times did you come?”

  “Just once.” I’m unfastening his jeans, pulling them apart. My hand brushes against his hardened cock, tucked away in his boxer shorts.

  “I can smell your arousal.” He growls out the words, leaning closer to me and nuzzling my neck. “You smell fucking divine.”

  Chapter nineteen

  Alex

  Irun my lips across her neck and enjoy the whimper she gives.

  She’s been on my mind all day long, and then, after parking the bike, I felt a prickly sensation at the back of my neck telling me I was being watched. Even as I’d turned, I hadn’t expected it to be her. It’s like a miracle that she agreed I could let myself in and come up.

  The light from her lamp is low, but I’m close enough that I can see the dewy glow on her skin, smell her arousal, and when I realised she had been using that toy to play and make herself come, my cock hardened faster than it ever has before. It’s uncomfortably rigid, desperate to be near this woman.

  Her hands are on the fly of my jeans and with each button that she loosens, I want to hiss out a breath. It’s like she’s moving painfully slowly, but perhaps that’s just because I’m so fucking eager. Eager to be naked, have her hands on my body, and on one body part in particular.

  I let out a breath as the last button is undone. It takes willpower not to take over and shuck my jeans and boxers off. Her fingers tentatively explore, swirling over my lower stomach. Her hands ease into the sides of my boxer shorts to caress my hips before she pushes my underwear and my jeans down my legs. My cock bobs, desperate for her attention. I brace a hand on the window frame behind her to lift a leg as she pulls my clothing off.

  I’m naked and she’s now crouched in front of me, looking up, watching me from under her lashes. My other hand reaches to cup her face. She leans into my touch, sighing at the contact.

  There’s a low, steady pulse thumping in my shaft as her hands run up the front of my thighs. Her lips part and then she leans forward and kisses the tip.

  “Fuck, Mel,” I growl. Without warning, she draws the head of my cock in and sucks like her life depends on it.