“Please, Alex, please fuck me.”

  He says nothing, but he slowly withdraws, all the way to the very tip. And then another plunge while he pulls my hips. It sends a pulse of pleasure that makes my toes curl and I grip hard at the sheets to stay in place.

  He sets a punishing rhythm. The slapping sounds of our bodies coming together with each thrust are filthy. The absolute definition of being railed. I can’t do much to participate other than hold steady and let him move my hips and my body as he sees fit as I savour the girth of his cock as he thrusts in and out of me.

  “I want you to touch yourself, Mel. I want you to get your finger on that swollen little clit of yours and massage it until you come all over my dick.”

  I lift my hand, taking a moment to find my balance, before I reach down between my legs, brushing my forefinger and middle finger against my clit. In this position, it’s swollen and sensitive and I press my two fingers either side of it, squeezing gently for pressure. Oh, my gosh. I swear, stars appear before my eyes. Fuck, that’s good.

  “That’s it, baby, work yourself to an orgasm.” Between the rasp of his voice and my fingers rubbing that oh-so-sensitive spot, I tremble all over. I gasp as the sensation overtakes me, every part of my body on fire as pleasure spreads all over me. I call out his name with a scream. Alex increases his pace, pumping several times until he lets loose a roar as his cock pulses deep within me.

  We stay where we are, panting. His cock still buried inside me, right to the hilt, causing aftershocks of pleasure. He runs his fingertips down my spine, causing an involuntary shiver to overtake my body.

  Jesus. This man. The things he does to me. I can’t help but wonder how long before he does them again.

  “What about Zack?” Alex asks.

  I check the time on my phone and see it’s still early. “I’m not expecting him anytime soon.”

  I’ve asked if Alex wants breakfast. We are both dressed, me in a smart casual outfit ready for some work calls later and Alex in the clothes he was wearing last night.

  “Okay, sounds good.” His thumbs latch into the belt loops of his jeans and he rises up onto his toes while he watches me fasten the last couple of buttons of my blouse.

  “Come on then.” I corral him out of my bedroom, and he follows me down the stairs.

  I make eggs on toast for us both while he prepares the coffee and we sit, side by side, at the breakfast bar. I watch with amusement as he shovels the food down, clearly ravenous.

  “Built up an appetite?” I joke.

  “Need to keep my strength up,” he says with a cheeky wink.

  “Oh yeah, what for?”

  “Ready for when my super sexy, secret lover is ready to come all over my cock again. Or my tongue. Or my fingers.”

  I chuckle at his forwardness.

  “Do you have any time this week to come to the studio for your pottery lesson? And we can grab lunch together,” he asks with a hopeful lilt in his voice.

  “I’d love that, but work is going to be manic for the next couple of weeks.”

  “Oh, okay, maybe when it’s quietened down then?” It’s impossible to miss the sound of disappointment in his voice.

  I feel the need to explain my brush off. “I’m trying really hard to prove myself at work. There’s the possibility of a promotion coming up and I’m hopeful I’ll be in the running.”

  “What’s the promotion?” he asks. His full attention is on me, his body facing me, making me feel like I’m the most important thing to him.

  “I’m currently an Events Co-ordinator—I run a portfolio of events. But there’s talk of a new role of Events Manager who would oversee the co-ordinators and be responsible for bringing in new opportunities. It’s fairly different from what I do now. But I’m so ready for the challenge. I’ve been feeling a bit bored lately.”

  “Have you always been in that line of work?” he asks.

  “Mostly. I started out more on the admin side—that’s how I first met Cassidy years ago. I love organising events, but while Zack was young, I did part-time hours. It made it hard to climb the ladder.” I pause, drawing in breath. Alex watches me intently. He’s such a good listener. “I’ve been full-time for a few years now and worked up from helping with events to being in charge of my portfolio. But…” I trail off, worried I’m boring him.

  “But what, Mel?” His hand reaches to brush against mine, clasped around my coffee cup.

  “Since the divorce, I’ve been fed up. There was a change in upper management and it’s all become very boys’ club. My male colleague seems to get heaps of encouragement and opportunities and yet, his events aren’t making as much of a profit and he’s not exceeding his KPI’s.” I blink as the frustration bubbles in my gut. “I work so bloody hard, Alex. I put in extra hours and I try to make everything perfect. And I get so annoyed when it’s not recognised.” I blow out a disheartened sigh.

  “It doesn’t surprise me that you’re a hard worker, Mel. It’s clear to me that you do everything you do to the best of your ability. It’s what I…” he trails off and glances to the side with a sheepish look on his face before turning back, “I really admire you for that.”

  I wonder what he was going to say, but I’m not brave enough to ask. “Thank you. That means a lot. I’ve been thinking about maybe going out on my own. Not in competition with my current employers though. I’d love to combine my events skills and my love of books and work with authors and readers.”

  His face is soft as I talk and his encouraging nod warms my heart.

  “I bet you’d be amazing at that. Maybe I could convince you to branch into events for other creatives. Potters, for instance.” His eyes twinkle cheekily. “Actually, on the subject of books, I have a confession to make.”

  “What is it?” I ask in puzzlement.

  “That first night I stayed over on the couch, I started reading one of your romance books.” My mouth falls open. “And then I decided to borrow it the next time I was visiting. I’ve been sneaking books in and out.”

  “What?” I giggle with mirth. “You like romance novels?”

  “Yeah, I do. I wanted to see what you liked. I’m learning a lot. You’ll have to show me your favourites. Maybe we can try some of the stuff out.” He waggles his brows mischievously. “If you don’t mind me borrowing them, that is.”

  “Of course not, go crazy. Maybe we can do a buddy read.” I lean in to rest my head on his shoulder. His confession adding to my ever increasing happiness. I could get used to this: spending time with him, talking, sharing our hopes and goals.

  And then, from the hallway, there’s the sound of the door opening. Fuck.

  My shock must show as Alex tilts his chair away from me, making some space between us.

  “Mel, it’s fine. Just chill. Just say you offered me breakfast when I came to see if I could do my laundry today,” he whispers, and I give him a grateful nod, just before Zack appears in the doorway.

  “Hey,” he says, frowning at Alex. “Bit early for you, isn’t it?”

  “I had laundry to do. Your mum offered to feed me.”

  “Ah, okay, any going spare, Mum?”

  “Give me a minute to finish these and I’ll make you some.”

  “Thanks.” He gives me a smile.

  Alex asks Zack about his night and they chat while I’m preparing Zack’s food. As I place the full plate in front of him, Alex rises from his seat.

  “Thanks for breakfast, Mel. I really appreciate it.”

  “Don’t forget your laundry,” Zack tells him, and there’s a tone to his words that I can’t quite decipher. It could be suspicion. Fuck, does he know?

  “I’m bringing it over later. I just came over to check it was okay before your mum started work.”

  Zack gives him a nod and gets stuck into his food.

  Alex approaches the back door and we both realise the same thing at once. The door isn’t yet unlocked. The key is still in the pot on the windowsill where I keep it at night. Alex looks at Zack, who is still busy with his food. Our gazes meet briefly and I give a smile, which could be mistaken for a grimace. He reaches into the pot and carefully lifts them out, trying not to let them rattle in his grasp. I hold my breath. And perhaps it’s that, or the sudden tension in the room, that has Zack lifting his head. There’s nothing I can do to warn Alex as he puts the key in the lock, but Zack watches him closely, with an expression on his face I can’t read.

  Chapter twenty-one

  Mel

  As Alex puts his hand on the handle to open the door and escape, Zack’s voice rings out. “Why was the door locked?”

  Alex looks at me and, if we weren’t screwed before, I think it’s that look that seals it.

  “What the actual fuck is going on here?” Zack sounds furious.

  I close my eyes for a second and draw in a breath.

  “Zack, it’s okay,” I say in my most soothing tone. He turns to face me, waiting for an explanation. “Alex, you can go,” I tell him gently.

  “Are you sure?” he checks, and Zack huffs when he does.

  “Yes, we’re all good. Bring that laundry over whenever you need to.”

  “Okay, I’ll catch you both later.” He gives one last glance at me, his brow knitted with worry before he leaves.

  “Did you sleep with him?” Zack demands.

  “Why do you think that?” I cock my head to the side, trying to buy myself some time to figure out how to get through this with the relationship with my son intact.

  “I’ve seen the way he looks at you. And even you look at him funny sometimes, too. So did you?”

  I can’t be anything but honest with him. I lean back against the kitchen counter. I’ve been standing, frozen in place, but I try to relax.

  “Yes, I did.” It’s hard to watch as his face screws up with disgust.

  “Did he take advantage of you?” This might just be the most uncomfortable conversation I’ve ever had with my son, but my heart warms at the thought of him looking out for me.

  “No, Zack, of course not. In fact, with the age difference, it’s more likely to be the other way around.”

  “How long has it been going on?” His voice is demanding.

  “Just last night, and once a couple of weeks ago.”

  He fists his hand and holds it to his lips for a moment, as if he’s trying not to lose control. “Wow, you must have been laughing at me, oblivious to what was happening. I only cottoned on because you were both being weird when I arrived.”

  “I promise you, Zack, we haven’t been laughing at you. I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

  “Why did it have to be one of my friends?” he asks earnestly.

  I crumble then, my shoulders caving in as I bow my head as the weight of the guilt and shame I had locked away breaks its way free.

  “I didn’t plan it, I swear. We were attracted to each other, and it just happened. I don’t want this to affect your friendship with him.”

  He laughs but there’s no humour in it. “Fat fucking chance of that. Why would I want a friend that does that?”

  “Does what?” I ask, gently, desperate to unpick this so I can mend it.

  “He’s clearly only friends with me so he can get to you.” He huffs.

  “You guys were friends before I met him. I don’t think he’s done any of this with some kind of malicious intent, Zack. I swear, it just happened.”

  My phone starts ringing and I know from the tone that it’s work, but I decide to ignore it and focus on this conversation.

  “Is that him?” It would be hard to miss the disapproval in his voice.

  “No, it’s a work call.” That seems to give Zack a way out of this conversation.

  “I’m going to grab a shower and then I need to head to college.”

  “Are we okay?” I ask, over the sound of the still ringing phone.

  “I dunno. I just want to forget I even know. I’ll see you later.”

  “Okay. I love you, Zack.”

  He releases another un-humorous laugh and then leaves the room. I wilt, wanting to scream and cry. Why did I let this happen? And why is the man that sets my body on fire and wants to worship me too damn young for me?

  I snatch my phone from the counter, but it’s stopped ringing. There’s a missed call from one of the girls in the office. I’ll call her back once I’ve calmed down.

  A notification pops up at the top of my screen.

  Alex:

  Are you okay? I can come back.

  A warmth spreads in my chest at his concern as I type a quick message back.

  Me:

  I’m fine. Zack is grabbing a shower and then heading to college.

  I leave it at that, trying not to encourage him but hopefully putting his mind at ease. I tidy up the kitchen and then head upstairs to try to get some work done.

  Once Zack has slammed his way back out of the house and I’ve had a catch up with the office, I pause for a moment.

  I need to talk to someone about this. If I sit here all day, I’m going to just keep replaying it all in my head and probably get nowhere. The night of incredible sex with Alex, then Zack finding out threatens me with overwhelm. I pull up Cassidy’s number on my phone and press call.

  “‘Lo,” she answers in a croaky voice after a few rings.

  “Oh shit, did I wake you?”

  “Hey, Mel. It’s fine. I need to get up anyway.” I hear a murmur of a male voice at the end of the line. “It’s okay, babe, go back to sleep. I’m gonna go talk to Mel.”

  I hear her moving around and then what could be a door closing behind her.

  “Hey, let me just start the coffee and then I’m all yours,” she tells me. In the background, there’s the sound of cupboards opening and closing and a kettle boiling. “Right, I’ll soon be caffeinated. What’s up?”

  “Why would anything be up? Couldn’t this just be a friendly call?” I’m stalling and I’m not sure why.

  “Mel, you always text first to check if it's okay to chat. If you’re ringing me straight off the bat, I shall assume it’s of a more urgent nature.”

  “Oh, fair enough.” I hedge a moment more. “Zack knows.”

  “Knows what? About you and Alex? Oh my god, did he catch you at it?”

  “No, thank goodness. Alex stayed over last night while Zack was at a friend’s. He came back early this morning while we were eating breakfast and chatting.”

  “Are you sure he knows? That could just be you being a nice person making Alex breakfast.”

  “No, he figured it out when Alex had to unlock the back door to get out.”

  “Oh… fuck…”

  “Yep.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  “I don’t know. I sent Alex away, and I was honest with Zack that it’s happened a couple of times and I didn’t mean it to. He asked if Alex had taken advantage of me.”

  “Ah, probably easier for him to deal with than to think about his mum actually wanting to have sex, I guess.”

  “Fuck, I’m going to have to stay away from Alex. This can’t happen again.”

  “Er, why the fuck not? If Zack knows now, it’s out in the open. You should totally just run with it now. Let the sexual chemistry run its course. Date him. Let him woo you.”

  “But every time we do something, it just makes me want him more.”

  “All the more reason to keep getting it. Look, you don’t need to be waving it in Zack’s face. But I think, if he knows, you just go for it. Tell him you’re gonna see what happens and that it’s not serious, anyway.”

  “Hmmmm,” I think about what she’s suggesting, but I’m still unsure.

  “It’s not serious, right?”

  “Oh no, of course not.” But as I say it, there’s a heavy tug in my chest, so much so that I have to rub the heel of my hand over my breastbone. Why can’t I be honest and say out loud how much I’m starting to like him?

  Around lunchtime, I make my way downstairs. I’ve been in and out of meetings since I got off the phone with Cassidy and I’m ready for coffee and food. I’m rummaging through the fridge, trying to work out what to eat, when there’s a knock at the back door.

  I straighten and look over, making out a silhouette that looks like Alex through the frosted glass. There’s no point avoiding him. It’s best that we have a chat and work out what happens next.

  “Hey,” I say as I open the door. “What the fuck is that?” I cry when I get a look at his face, his eye black and swollen.

  “It’s nothing. I just wanted to check you were okay?”

  “How did you get a black eye, Alex?” He just shakes his head, refusing to answer. “Was it Zack?”

  His grimace gives me my answer, even if he doesn’t want to say it.

  “What the fuck is he playing at?”

  “Look, he’s angry with me. He thinks you’re vulnerable, and I took advantage of you. And let’s face it, I’m a shit friend. I fucked his mum. I deserve the black eye.” He shrugs it off as if it’s nothing.

  “Come in.” I reach over and draw him in by the hand. “Have you iced it?”

  “I didn’t have any ice. I did put a wet cloth on it for a while. It’s hurting a lot less than when he did it.”

  “When did he do it?”

  “He came and banged on the door a few hours ago; before he had to go to college, I guess.”

  Shit. I hadn’t even realised. Just assumed when I heard him leave that he was on his way to college. I push Alex onto a stool and use a tea towel to make a poultice with some ice that I gently press to his swollen eye.

  “I’ll talk to him.”

  “Mel, he’s within his rights. He thinks I took advantage of you.”

  “Stop saying that. You didn't take advantage and we both know it. Fuck!”

  “What happens now?” he asks, pressing the cold pack to his eye as I pace up and down.

  “I don’t know. First, I was going to tell you it couldn’t happen again. Then my friend Cass suggested that, given that it’s all out in the open, we should just let it run its course. But now I don’t know again.”