Rhett

  “You are an idiot,” Nana Steele scolded for the third time since we’d been back in the car. “That Amy girl is perfectly nice, but she doesn’t hold a candle to Emery.” She hmphed. “At least you didn’t pick one of the bimbos.”

  “The point of this contest, Nana, is for me to get to know each of the girls, give each of them a chance to get to know me. I’ve spent time with Emery and—”

  Her head whipped in my direction. “You’ve what? When? Why didn’t you tell me, young man?”

  Despite the interrogation, it was also comforting to have someone care enough to press me for answers. Teachers had done that back in school, especially the ones who took the time to see past the scared boy I once was. But now, ever since the breakthrough patent that had changed everything — a handheld gaming device that took Asia by storm — people respected me, but it was usually because they wanted something in return.

  Nana Steele wanted nothing from me. She didn’t need my wealth or connections. She’d simply taken a shine to me and wanted me to be happy. Whatever happy was.

  I was satisfied.

  Content.

  Creating the Beasts had been one of the best and worst things I’d ever done. It had fulfilled a dream but also filled a hole inside me I didn’t know was there. The guys pissed me off, but they’d become my family too. In a fight, I knew they’d have my back.

  I looked down at the small woman beside me. Nana Steele had my back too.

  And Emery Rose.

  Dillon had told me about the conversation he’d interrupted at breakfast, and even though I’d been absolutely certain I was going to send Emery home at elimination, I wasn’t certain what I was going to do now.

  I’d come out of my seat when that tittering woman tripped her in that way. But Nana Steele had grabbed my arm, pulled me down, and whispered, “This is her fight. Let her fight it.”

  Nana had been right. I hadn’t been able to take my eyes off the slip of a woman who had chopped and stirred and smashed like a demon was chasing her ass. And she’d been funny too, turning up that wine.

  God, I liked her.

  Felt a connection to her that scared the shit out of me.

  I was beginning to crave her. Her smell. The way her eyes changed color. The soft touch of her hands.

  I needed to send her home. And in a single moment of strength, I’d chosen Amy as the winner of the contest. Now, I realized it wasn’t strength that had me make that choice. It was cowardice. I was a coward.

  “Rhett… are you okay?”

  Nana’s soft hand settled on top of mine.

  I looked down at her. “I really don’t know.” She patted me, let the silence settle between us. “There’s something so innocent about her. I don’t want to tarnish something so pure.”

  Nana scoffed. “Don’t go putting angel wings on her. She’s a person, a human being, Rhett. She’s old enough to make her own decisions. Don’t rob her of that.”

  “She’s smart.”

  Nana nodded. “Clearly.”

  “Brave.”

  “I’ve seen evidence of that.”

  “She has an interesting past.”

  Nana Steele threw up her hands. “Who doesn’t?”

  I laughed. Who doesn’t indeed?

  But I found myself telling her about Emery’s boyfriend and what Dillon had discovered. I also found myself telling her about my theory that Emery shared her boyfriend with other men.

  She considered but shook her head, tapping her lips with her index finger. “I remember that shooting. I made a sizable donation to the victims. I’m disappointed in myself that I didn’t recognize Emery. Memory isn’t as good as it once was.”

  I snorted. Nana Steele’s mind was like a steel trap.

  “The press hounded that girl, but she never once spoke about it. Oh, his parents did. They were so shocked and ashamed…” Nana curled her lip in disgust, “then the whole thing just went away as some other newsworthy item came along and pushed it out of the spotlight.”

  “What do you think? Does it change how you feel about her?”

  Nana shook her head. “Not in the least. We love who we love. But I think your theory might be off.”

  I turned in the seat to face her more fully. “How’s that?”

  She continued to tap her lip, deep in thought. “Based on what I remember, Emery and that young man had been friends for many, many years. I think they were each other’s support system. She might have covered for him, helped him hide his sexuality. From what I remember of his mother, I wouldn’t blame him for hesitating to come out. Then to be gay in the NFL…” she shook her head sadly.

  “So they supported each other…” I prompted.

  “Yes, as best friends who cared about the other. From what I’ve seen of Emery, she has a very compassionate spirit. I bet they were boyfriend and girlfriend in every way but one.” She looked up at me. “I’d bet my savings account that that girl is a virgin.”

  I felt like I’d been sucker punched.

  But as I thought of it, it made more and more sense. And the more sense it made, the sadder I became.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “If she’s innocent…” I couldn’t finish the sentence.

  Nana squeezed my hand. “Then you’ll be gentle with her. You’ll do right by her. You won’t treat her the same way you’d treat someone more experienced.”

  “You’re very liberal,” I said.

  She hmphed. “I’m very old. I’ve made many mistakes in my life, and I’ve learned from them. Tried to do better. Mr. Steele and I had a very good life together, God rest his soul. But he wasn’t my first, Rhett…”

  Oh dear god.

  She winked. “… or my last. My first was a boy I was simply crazy about. I was seventeen and foolish, and just strong-minded enough back in those days to turn my back on convention.”

  “What happened?”

  “He was called off to the Korean War and never returned.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  Nana sighed. “Me too. I’ve had other lovers, then met my husband and lived happily until his death. I’ve been a very fortune woman. I’ve never lacked for anything in a material way. I’ve never known hunger, unless it was one of the crazy diets I’ve tried over the years. I could buy anything I wanted. I had power that protected me from the outside world. And yet…”

  Sadness welled in her eyes. “I’ve never forgotten James. I’ve never stopped missing him.” She squeezed my hand. “Don’t live with regrets, Rhett. James was taken from me, so that is different. What you don’t want to live with is the regret of losing people on purpose, just because you’re afraid to get close.”

  “I fucked up,” I admitted.

  Nana smacked my hand. “Yes, you did. But it isn’t a mistake that can’t be fixed. If you vote that girl off, you’ll regret it. That won’t be so easily remedied.”

  “What do I do?”

  She sighed. “You go out with Amy tonight and give her a chance. Get to know her, be a good escort. See if there is a connection between the two of you that you haven’t seen because Emery distracted you. It’s only right that you give Amy a fair chance because she’s uprooted her life to be here. And she is a nice girl. Pretty. Good head on her shoulders. Then, later tonight, get rid of that Carlie person. If nothing else, get rid of her for me. If I have to look at her one more time, I’m sticking a pin in her. She’s so full of hot air and other noxious gasses that she’d fly into outer space.”

  I laughed. “Thanks. I feel better.”

  “Good.” She patted my hand again, leaving it there to soothe me. “Rhett…”

  “Yes.”

  “Anytime you want to talk about your father, I’ll listen and never judge.”

  Emotion kicked me in the face, and I turned my head to look out the window.

  “No pressure, mind you. Just wanted to make the offer. Secrets grow when they’re kept inside you, become a monster that makes you fear their exposure. When you set them free, they evaporate like the ghost they are.”

  “Thank you. I’m not sure that I’m ready to talk about it now.”

  Or I’d end up in her lap, crying like a baby as I sucked my thumb.

  “Offer is open anytime.”

  We rode in silence the rest of the way to the estate and arrived just after the women. They were piling out of the cars. While most of them went inside, Emery headed down to the water.

  Nana squeezed me. “Go talk to her.”

  As soon as the car stopped, and I’d helped Nana into the house, I found Emery down at the water’s edge. I’d grabbed a woolen blanket, and she didn’t flinch when I laid it across her shoulders.

  “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  She inhaled a long breath. “It’s so beautiful here.”

  “Yes, it is. This view is what sold me on the house.”

  The conversation lagged, but the silence wasn’t uncomfortable. But I was uncomfortable. The need to apologize was burning me.

  “I’m sorry,” I blurted, and she glanced over at me.

  “For what?”

  I realized she had a right to be confused. There were many things I could be apologizing for.

  “For last night. For letting my feelings about last night cause me to not choose you as the winner today. Your steak was…” I made a pained sound, “excellent.”

  She smiled and lifted a shoulder. “It’s okay. Apology accepted. And I apologize too.”

  I echoed her words. “For what?”

  “For making you feel like you owed me that apology. What happened between us last night was between two consenting adults. I don’t know what I did to make you change your mind, but that was your choice. It’s my responsibility to deal with my feelings about it.”

  “Emery, you did nothing to change my mind. I just got…” I wasn’t sure how to explain.

  “Freaked out? Turned off?”

  “No, dammit. I got scared.”

  She turned to stare up at me, her eyes wide. Instead of questioning me, she turned back to the water. “I understand scared.” The words were so quiet they were nearly carried off by the breeze. I felt them caress my cheek.

  “What scares you, Emery?”

  She didn’t answer, and when I looked over at her, I noticed how pink the tip of her nose had become.

  “Emery?”

  She sniffed hard, running the back of her hand under her nose. “Losing people I love. Sometimes, I think it would just be easier to be alone than suffer through that again.” She laughed softly. “On the horrendously opposite side, I’m also afraid of being alone. But not because I’m afraid I can’t take care of myself…”

  “Then why?”

  She took a long time to answer, if you could call it that. “Do you think that mental illness is hereditary?”

  I flinched, glad she didn’t see it. “I think genetics plays a role. There are biological, psychological, and environmental factors as well. Why do you ask?”

  The girl became more fascinating and terrifying by the second. We were even more alike than I originally believed.

  “Because I—”

  “Rhett!”

  I turned to see Wanda running toward us, my housekeeper’s arms waving over her head. I’d never seen her run before. “Something’s wrong,” I said to Emery and took off toward the house.

  In seconds, Emery had caught up, the blanket flying behind her. In three-inch heels and a foot shorter than me, it was impressive.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked Wanda when I reached her.

  She was huffing. She took a deep breath so she could speak. “That horrible woman… she…”

  “Where?”

  “Den.”

  I took off, Emery right beside me. The moment I was inside the house, I heard them. Correction, I heard Nana.

  “You, tart! You need to learn some respect.”

  I reached Nana Steele just as she was about to whack Carlie with the poker from the fireplace. Gently, I took it out of her hands. Emery took it from me, and I could see her move to put it back where it belonged before standing in front of the fire, watching the proceedings carefully.

  Carlie glared at me and pointed at the older woman. “She’s crazy!”

  Abby, the hairdresser, stepped up beside her. “Yeah. Crazy.”

  The other women in the room just stared, some with their mouths covered.

  “What happened?”

  Nana didn’t hesitate to answer. She lifted her chin, looking like the queen she was. “That woman assaulted me.”

  Carlie huffed. “It was just little push. I can’t help that the old lady’s balance is off.”

  Abby was nodding in defense of her friend, her cap of hair glued in place, unmoving with the wild jerks of her head. “It was only this.” She shoulder-checked Carlie, just enough to knock the taller woman a bit sideways.

  “We captured the entire thing on film,” one of the cameramen added helpfully.

  I didn’t need to see a replay.

  Through gritted teeth, I asked Carlie, “Why would you do that?”

  “Because I called her out for tripping Emery at the cooking competition,” Nana answered for her.

  Carlie rolled her eyes. “Pa-lease, it’s a comp-i-ti-tion. All girls for themselves. It’s not my fault that she’s a klutz.”

  “It appears that nothing is your fault, Carlie,” Nana agreed with her.

  The woman smiled, eyes brightening as she threw up her hands. “Exactly!”

  I could only shake my head. Unbelievable. “Get out of my house. You’re done.”

  The smile slipped away. “What?”

  She looked so completely surprised, it almost made me laugh. Almost.

  “You have one hour to pack your bags and leave my house.”

  Abby stepped in. “But—”

  “Want to make this a double elimination?” I asked her, and her mouth snapped shut. She clearly wasn’t friends enough to go down with the sinking ship.

  Carlie burst into tears. “This isn’t fair,” she cried, her bosom bobbing with her shaking shoulders.

  “Where’s that fire poker?” Nana mumbled beside me.

  Carlie huffed and turned on her heel, her shoes making a stomping noise on the floor as she marched away.

  “This is excellent,” Mitch O’Dell yelled, clapping his hands together. “Camera one, follow Carlie as she packs.” He turned to a producer. “Better ask her the exit interview questions while she’s doing it.”

  They scurried away to do his bidding. In the distance, I heard Carlie scream, “Turn that off!”

  I hoped they wouldn’t.

  “Cameras two and three, let’s set up to do post-drama interviews,” O’Dell barked. “We’ll shoot them now to capture the most natural reactions. We also need to do post-cooking competition interviews, so plan on an hour per girl.”

  “So, no elimination ceremony tonight?” one of the cameramen asked.

  O’Dell scratched his chin. “We’ll do the ceremony, then fill the empty space post-production with scenes from the past ten minutes. We’ll add roll from where she tripped Emery.” He clapped his hands together again. “It will be good.”

  “No.”

  All eyes turned on me, the group growing silent. “You’re welcome to add those scenes as to why Carlie isn’t in the lineup, but I also want another elimination.”

  Abby gasped, but I ignored her.

  O’Dell frowned. “That will throw the show off.”

  “I don’t care. You can do a recap show to fill in one of the slots.”

  O’Dell brightened. “Yes, I could do that.” He looked at me. “Are you sure?” I let my eyes answer for me. “Okay, I’ll figure it out. Nice work, ladies. Prepare for post-interviews.”

  In a whirl of barking orders, he was gone, and the entire room seemed to sigh in relief.

  I laid a hand on Nana Steele’s shoulder. “Are you okay?”

  Very daintily, she rubbed her thigh. “Just a bruise. When I lost my balance, I hit a table, but I’ll be fine.”

  The thought of anyone hurting this precious person made me growl. Emery came over. “Let’s go check it out. Put some ice on it for any swelling.”

  My respect for the young woman continued to grow as I watched her guide Nana from the room, her arm around her shoulders.

  As they were turning the corner, Nana looked back at me and winked. And just like that, I relaxed, and my mind wandered back to the conversation in the car. Was Emery a virgin?

  I’d never been with a virgin. I’d been with women who knew what they wanted and weren’t afraid to go after it.

  The enormity of the responsibility was repressive, and I felt the weight of it settle on my shoulders. How did you make a woman’s first time special so she could look back on it with fondness instead of regret?

  I exhaled. I was getting ahead of myself. I didn’t even know if Emery would ever let me touch her again after the stunt I pulled last night.

  “How are you holding up?” The question came from Amy, but all of the women were looking at me — Abby red-faced and angry.

  “I’m doing well. Just feeling like I’m living in a pressure cooker lately.”

  They all laughed, except Abby. She and her pixie cut needed to go.

  Daphne smiled. “I think you’re doing well under the circumstances. It must be difficult trying to spend time with so many women at the same time.”

  I remembered a five-way I participated in a couple years ago. Me and four women had been exhausting, and not as much fun as I would have imagined. I ended up feeling like a piece of meat. Much like I was feeling right now.

  When I met Gabrielle’s gaze, she licked her lips and headed my way. “Shall I pour you a drink so you can relax?”

  It wasn’t even lunchtime. “No, thank you though. I have some things I need to attend to, and I know you will be busy with interviews. Enjoy the rest of your day.”

  She gave me a sexy pout but didn’t push me. It was a wise decision.

  I looked at Amy. “See you tonight.”

  Amy smiled. “I’m looking forward to it.”

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  Emery

  “I hope you have a wonderful time.”

  Amy hugged me in response, her brilliant smile filled with nervousness and anticipation. “Thank you so much.”