Rhett looked at me with so much kindness and compassion, I nearly started to cry again. He was right. My past was just that… my past. It didn’t define the person I was today, and it was time to let it go.

  “I could tell you, but I think it would be better if I showed you.”

  Rhett nodded, and I thought Mr. O’Dell took his first breath in minutes.

  “Alright, everyone. We have a van waiting. Emery, tell us where you want us to go.”

  I could see the gleam in his eyes as he recognized he had a good story. I didn’t blame him for it, but I resented it all the same. A part of me wanted to run, but the newer, braver side wanted to face it all.

  I nodded and moved to stand up. Rhett took my hand. Nana Steele took my other one. Together, we piled into the van, and I directed Dillon to the cemetery.

  Starting with my mother — after all, my entire life started with her — I trudged our little group to her grave. I’d already told Rhett the story of my birth, but I repeated it for the cameras. “My mother was a beautiful woman who made my father very happy. When he lost her, the responsibility of raising a seven-year-old and a newborn was too much, I guess. He began holding onto things. Every. Thing.”

  I turned and looked the camera straight in its black lens. “But I won’t let anyone make fun of him, or judge him within hearing distance of me. I wish I could show you the daddy who tucked me in at night. The daddy who made me chicken soup when I was sick. But that daddy doesn’t exist any longer. What’s left is his shell, and I still love him.”

  A strong wind whipped my hair back, and I looked up at the heavens, feeling the spirit of my mother close to me.

  I looked at Rhett again. “Children are cruel. They made fun of my father, of me, for years. There was a taunt that I can still hear. Stink-y Em-er-y. Sometimes their voices are loud. I was lonely as a girl until a boy moved into town. His name was Ryan. I’d like to introduce you to him now.”

  With Rhett’s hand tight around mine, I took us to Ryan’s gravestone. I waited for the cameras to get in place before beginning.

  “For many years, Ryan Steadman was my sole source of comfort. He never judged me, not once. He never made fun of me, not once. Instead, he opened up a place for me to be in his life. He offered his protection and his love.”

  Emotion hit me so hard I thought I’d sink to my knees and beat my fists against the grass. But I held on, forcing it down, needing to finish this.

  “Small towns can often be unkind to people who are different,” I said when I was able to continue. “I wasn’t the only different one. Ryan was too. At six-five and three hundred pounds, he was a giant of a man. A tremendous defensive force on the football field. And he was gay. He hid his sexuality from his family who wouldn’t have accepted it. He hid it professionally because gay NFL players aren’t easily accepted. One night, he decided to take a step into that part of his life. He went to a nightclub on the same night a madman opened fire on the crowd. He didn’t survive.”

  I took a deep breath, feeling stronger now.

  “Yes, I pretended to be his girlfriend so he could walk among society and not be judged for who he wanted to love. It was pretend, but it also wasn’t. I loved him. I was proud to be by his side. I was content to live with him. He brought me tremendous joy…”

  I squeezed Rhett’s hand.

  “And I grieved him terribly. I grieve him still. I love him still. And I hope he is resting in peace. A peace he never had while he lived among us.”

  I looked over at Mr. O’Dell. “Is that enough?”

  Tears flowed from the man’s eyes, and he nodded. “What do you want to do next?”

  Trying to lighten the heavy mood that had settled around us, I asked, “Does that mean I get to be director for the day?”

  He came over to me and gave me a bear hug. “Darling, you can be anything you want.”

  I smiled. “Then let’s get the hardest part over with, but I need you to promise that if my father doesn’t want any of this footage seen, you won’t air it. Do you promise?”

  O’Dell nodded. “Of course.”

  “I heard you agree to that,” Nana Steele snapped and lifted a finger in the director’s face. “If you break that promise, you’ll have me to contend with.”

  O’Dell gulped.

  Not knowing if I was doing the right thing, I gave Dillon directions to my father’s house. Juliette gasped and squeezed my shoulder as it came into view.

  When the van stopped, nobody moved.

  “Just remember that hoarding is a mental disease,” I told them. “He’s afraid of letting things go because it’s a reminder of losing my mother.”

  “In a very sad way, that’s romantic,” Nana Steele offered.

  “Yes, it is,” Juliette agreed.

  In a way, I guessed it was. As much as I’d loved Ryan, it had never occurred to me to hurt myself in this or any other way. I remembered how Rhett had held me after I’d ziplined down the mountain. He’d clung to me, his fears taking over his reality. But he’d snapped out of it. My father never did.

  As I gazed at the house, I saw the front door open a crack. I knew my dad was standing there afraid, wondering who was outside.

  I looked at Rhett. “Let’s go.”

  He opened the door and offered his hand as he got out. Together, we walked to the front porch. The door opened a little bit more as my father recognized me, but he still looked terrified.

  “Hi, Dad.”

  “What’s goin’ on?”

  “I wanted you to meet someone important to me. And I wanted you to meet him.”

  The door opened a little more.

  Rhett stepped forward and held out his hand. “Mr. Rose, it’s my honor to meet you. I’m Rhett Hamilton, and I wanted to tell you personally that you raised a very beautiful and loving daughter.”

  Dad smiled a little. “That’s my Em-n-em.” The smile faltered. “Who are all those people in the van?”

  “They’re my friends, Dad. We’re shooting a reality show. It’s how I met Rhett.”

  Dad frowned. “Are those cameras?”

  I turned around, unhappy to see the cameraman standing next to the van. “Yes, but they won’t use any footage you don’t want them to. They wanted to see my hometown. See my family. Do you want to meet them?”

  Dad scrubbed his hand over his face and looked around. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea. The place is a little messy right now. How ‘bout you come back tomorrow when I get a chance to clean things up a bit.”

  I smiled at him and realized what I must do. I couldn’t put him through this.

  “That’s okay, Dad. We’ll need to get going. Maybe you can meet everyone another day.”

  His face brightened. “That’ll be better. I’ll make us some of that homemade soup you used to love. Won’t that taste good?”

  I leaned in to hug him. “That will taste great.” I kissed his scruffy cheek. “Bye, Dad.”

  “Bye, Em-n-em. Come back soon.”

  Rhett stuck out his hand, and the men shook. “Nice meeting you, sir.”

  “You too. Take care of my girl.”

  “I’ll do that.”

  We turned away, and the door clicked softly behind us. Rhett wrapped an arm around my shoulders as we walked down the porch.

  “Em!”

  The sound of the door opening had us turning back. Dad stood in the doorway, a box in his hands. I looked up at Rhett. “I’ll be right back.”

  He kissed my hair. “I’ll be waiting.”

  Walking back up the steps, my legs felt weighted in cement.

  “After you left the last time, I started rearrangin’, just like I told you I would. Got your bedroom pert near back to the way it was.” He held the box out to me. “And I found this. Thought you might like to have it.”

  It was my treasure box that I thought was lost forever. I opened it to find picture after picture of my mom and dad back in happier times. Pictures of me and my sister as we were growing up.

  “Thank you so much,” I said, kissing his cheek again. I realized how difficult it was for him to part with what I now held in my hands. “I love you, Daddy.”

  “I love you too, Em-n-em. Come back and visit me soon.”

  I gave him my best smile, remembering the man who once held me on his lap, tickling me until I couldn’t breathe. “Take care of yourself.”

  As we rode around the town, exhaustion seeped into my bones. O’Dell wanted more film of where I’d grown up so I showed him the quaint downtown area, the few historic sites the small town boasted. I took them to the old watermill that still generated electricity and the pretty waterfall that spilled from the mountain.

  There, Rhett and I shared our first on-camera kiss. It would make for good TV.

  Since there were no decent hotels in the area, everyone but Rhett and I drove to the nearest big town to stay at the Holiday Inn. Rhett and I stayed on the plane, and he introduced me to the mile-high club on the ground.

  The next morning, we flew back to Rhett’s estate. Two hours later, I waved as he left with Amy and the exact same crew that had been with me in West Virginia.

  As they drove away for their night together, I was too numb to even cry.

  CHAPTER TWENTY TWO

  Rhett

  Leaving Emery on the steps of my home was one of the hardest things I’d ever done. But I was going to damn well finish this show, get it over with, and this trip was the last obstacle to cross.

  Amy’s childhood home was lovely. A small craftsman style with a picket fence, there was nothing glamorous about it, but it felt homey and welcoming. I met her mother, who looked frail but also happy. It was obvious as to whom Amy took her generous and loving personality from.

  I couldn’t help making comparisons.

  I’d never seen anything like what Emery had once lived in. I’d been horrified and had tried my best to not let it show.

  How could anyone live like that? It didn’t seem possible that a rodent let alone a human being could survive, much less live, in such a mountain of filth. Even thinking about it, the smell still made me gag each time I thought about it too hard.

  When we’d gotten back to the van, Emery had forbidden any of the footage be used. I couldn’t blame her, and I was glad that she’d chosen to keep that part of her life private. Neither she nor her father deserved that type of scrutiny.

  Not that it would remain a secret for long. Some media hound would probably get wind of it, especially when Emery won the show and we became an official couple. That was why I’d had my name changed and all mentions of my former life sealed.

  I was so glad that I’d never told Renee my real name, I’d only told her about some of my father’s past and my mother’s suicide. With a little detective work, she could have put two and two together probably, but she never did that I knew of. I guessed she didn’t care enough to. Or maybe she figured it was best to never know.

  But I’d told Emery. She knew everything. I’d laid my soul open to her that night, trusting her completely. As open as she’d been to sharing her secrets, mine were better left in the past. If nothing else, I refused to give Mack Gordon the celebrity I knew he’d acquire if his name was associated with me.

  The hair stood up on my neck at the thought.

  As we said goodbye to Amy’s mother, I spied an envelope with a hospital name on the front. Sure enough, it was a bill, and I slipped it in my pocket. I’d make an arrangement with the hospital to cover this and all future bills too.

  At the end of the long day, Amy and I were left on the plane alone just as Emery and I had been last night. I guessed it was part of the closing build up to make viewers wonder who I’d choose.

  What they’d never see was how I’d grabbed a blanket and pillow from the closet and spent a sleepless night on the couch. Amy, the generous person she was, didn’t push anything, and I was grateful for that. Instead, we’d talked for hours, and I’d kissed her cheek when it was time for bed. I was so comfortable around this poised young woman. I was going to miss her very much.

  The next morning, the crew was back, and we drove around gathering footage of her town. Hours later, we were on the jet again, finally heading home.

  “One last night,” Amy sighed from beside me. “I can’t believe it’s almost over. The big elimination is tonight.”

  “I know. It’s been a weird mixture of time speeding up and slowing down.”

  She nodded. “Do you have any regrets?”

  I considered the question. “No, not really. I don’t think I’d ever do anything like this again. I’m not accustomed to my privacy being invaded to this degree.”

  She laughed. “That is an understatement.”

  There was a soft snore, and I looked over to see Nana Steele with her head thrown back, a bright purple diamond-encrusted sleep mask covering her eyes.

  “I think I’ll miss her most of all,” Amy said, looking at Nana too.

  “Yeah, she sure is something. If she were fifty years younger, I’d marry her tomorrow.”

  We continued to chat then shifted into a comfortable silence as we prepared to land. I checked my watch. Only a couple more hours until the final elimination.

  Then Emery and I could escape to an island.

  Make love all day. Fuck all night.

  The thought made me smile.

  Piling into a van for the final time, I was relieved to see my home again, knowing Emery was waiting inside. I was the first to climb out, though good manners forced me to wait on Amy and Nana to escort them inside.

  The house was quiet, which I knew wouldn’t last as the crew clamored inside. I was surprised to see Katrina Delaney standing just inside the foyer. She looked worried, and I wondered which Beast had done something stupid this time.

  “Who is it and what did they do?” I asked her as I hung Nana’s coat in the closet.

  “Can we talk privately?” Katrina asked.

  I groaned and shrugged off my coat. “Is it that bad?”

  She didn’t answer, just shifted from one foot to the other. She was holding a stack of newspapers to her chest, looking more miserable by the second.

  “Okay, let’s go to my office.”

  She followed me, and I looked around for Emery but didn’t see her anywhere. She wasn’t in her favorite chair. I hoped this thing with Katrina could be taken care of quickly so I could find her.

  As I was closing the door to my office, it was pushed open, and Dillon appeared. “I just heard,” he said, running a hand over his bald head.

  “Heard what?”

  Dillon looked from me to Katrina. She shook her head, holding the newspapers tighter to her chest.

  “Heard what?” I repeated, louder this time, getting seriously worried.

  Dillon stepped through the doorway, shutting and locking the door behind him. I turned on Katrina and growled through my teeth, “Heard what?”

  With a long sigh, Katrina handed me a copy of today’s New York Times. My picture was on the front. Beside it was a mug shot of my father. The headline read:

  “Rhett Hamilton’s True Identity Revealed”

  I did look like my father. Mom was right. Same hair. Same eyes. Same nose.

  Barely able to breathe, I scanned the story.

  A source close to Rhett Hamilton revealed that Mr. Hamilton’s birth name is Jonathon Samuel Gordon…

  A product of rape…

  Mother killed herself…

  At least they got the facts right.

  “Rhett…” Katrina said softly, “women are already coming forward accusing you of rape. Some are talking about how you used whips on them. Something about a club you’re a member of.” She shook her head and plastered her hands to her cheeks. “I’m so sorry.”

  I sank into a chair, unable to believe it.

  Dillon walked over to the bar, poured a drink, and thrust it into my hands.

  “I’ve never…” I trailed off. No matter how careful I’d been, no matter how often I asked permission, I was a monster by association.

  And Emery had done this to me.

  That was the knife that twisted in my gut. I trusted her. I cared for her deeply, might even be falling in love with her. I’d believed her when she said she cared for me too.

  Rage filled the vacuum of where my heart had once resided. I felt it sweep over me like a tornado.

  Tossing back the drink, I stood up and threw the glass against the wall. It exploded into a million tiny pieces.

  Then I was out the door, searching the rooms, looking for her. How could she do this? How much did they pay her? I had to know.

  A hand came down on my shoulder. Without thinking, I whirled and slammed my fist into Dillon’s face. Someone screamed as the big man went down, but I didn’t care.

  People thought I was a monster?

  I would make sure they knew it was true.

  I crashed through the house, slamming into room after room, but she wasn’t there.

  Had she sold the story and run?

  I kicked the door of her bedroom open and it slammed into the wall. It was the first time I’d been in Emery’s room, and I wasn’t sure what would be missing. The room didn’t even look lived in. Nothing was out of place.

  The lake.

  Stomping back down the stairs, I ignored the people calling my name. I grabbed a camera off a man’s shoulder and slammed it on the marble, shattering it.

  Out the front door, I scanned the yard, scanned the lake.

  There.

  A small form sitting on the bank. I began to run, adrenaline and anger and pain powering me on. She must have heard my approach, felt the rage barreling down on her like a train, because she turned.

  And she smiled.

  And she stood up and faced me.

  Then she wasn’t smiling anymore.

  Her eyes widened as I grabbed her upper arms and shook her. “How could you do it?”

  “W-what?”

  She looked so frightened, and she should have been, but instead of trying to pull away from me, she stepped closer, trying to touch me, trying to make me listen.

  “I believed in you!” I roared. “I trusted you!”