Antor Thon smiled. “You quite literally became another person out there.”

  A low dais had been set up near the monuments. I read the plaque attached to my statue. Actually, because the plaque was in Martian, I could only read the three words of my name: Elvis Aaron Presley. I was glad that the Martians had spelled my middle name correctly, rather than my father’s misspelling, “Aron.”

  Vaq Antor addressed his people at length, with many gestures. I could tell even without understanding his words that he was a great orator as well as a valiant military leader.

  When the ruler of the city finished, his son, my friend, Antor Thon, went to the microphone and said a few words. He concluded by pointing to me and saying, “Brithen Tori. Elvis Presley.” I joined him on the dais, and the people began to cheer and chant my name.

  “They wish for you to sing to them.”

  “I can do that. What should I give them? ‘Jailhouse Rock’ or ‘How Great Thou Art’?”

  Antor Thon looked thoughtful. “I think they want to hear your Earth rock ’n’ roll. Is it pleasant to hear?”

  “It is if it’s played right.” I smiled. “And I play it right.” Without a guitar or backup band, I sung “Jailhouse Rock” for them a cappella. It was, if I may say so, one of my finest renditions. I planned to follow it with a few verses of “Rip It Up,” but I never got the chance. The little Martian fellas were charging toward the stage.

  I’d had some experience with this before, you know. I ducked back off the dais, taking a final glance at my statue. I stood there, twenty feet high, in my fighting harness, with a sword raised triumphantly against the shrunken Martian sun. I sprinted toward the palace, and my thoughts were calm and peaceful after the carnage of that afternoon: Pepsi and Colgate toothpaste.

  Maybe three or four cheeseburgers.

  Behind me, I heard Antor Thon shouting, “Ladies and gentlemen! Brithen Tori has left the planet! Elvis has left the planet!”

  I hoped the little fella wouldn’t forget to tell them to drive home safely.

 

 

  Anthology, Alien Pregnant by Elvis

 

 

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