“All the bedrooms are upstairs, each one a decent size.” She continues on. “The largest, of course, being the master with its own private bath. The other full bathroom is in the hallway, accessible to all the other bedrooms.”

  I walk toward the back French doors and push them open stepping out onto the back deck. The river runs through the backyard and I grin when I see the mailbox on the dock. It still amazes me that more than three fourths of the residents of Magnolia Grove get their mail by boat. And what’s more amazing is Mattie delivers it.

  “Seems like a big house for one guy,” I glance back to find her eyeing me with a smirk. Small towns and all that, I’m sure there is so much more she truly wants to add to her sentence but she waits.

  “Space is always good.” She nods, still holding my stare.

  “Yes, but it can also get lonely, quiet.” Leaning back against the counter, her grin deepens. “Of course two little girls laughing and running through these halls would make it all come alive.”

  “That’s very precise.” I’ll give it to her, she isn’t messing around.

  “Zoey deserves a happy ever after,” she adds, before locking eyes with me and squinting slightly. “She’s been through enough, those girls, sweet as pie. From what I hear, the two of you were pretty hot and heavy years ago.”

  “Hot and heavy.” I laugh and her smile widens.

  “Lots of sneaking out in the middle of the night, necking in the fields like all you kids do.” I chuckle feeling the heat rise in my cheeks. “She’s different now.” Verna’s words trigger a curiosity in me. “High stressed, she smiles, but the thing is the smiles rarely reach her eyes which is sad. She is far too young to have so much regret, and the worry about those girls. She has done an amazing job with Riley and Regan but the fear is she has somehow messed up their lives is always on her mind.”

  I think of the way Zoey used to be, so carefree and vibrant. It’s true, I can see what Verna is referring to. “Is there wiggle room on the price?” I ask choosing to let the conversation about Zoey fade. “With a fresh coat of paint, new flooring and some other typical updates, I feel like this could be the place.”

  “For a family?” I smile because I can’t seem to stop it. A family is exactly what I see when I think of this being my home.

  When I don’t answer Verna she laughs and grabs her briefcase, lifting in to place onto the kitchen countertop. “The previous owner is eager to sell, so let’s make an offer and get you your home.”

  “What do you think?” I watch as Dean, my brother’s best friend walks around the main living space of my newly purchased home. As of ten a.m. this morning I am a homeowner. It all feels so real now, as I slowly settle into my life in Magnolia Grove, Alabama. The only thing still missing is the woman, though I know where she is, she has yet to accept she is part of my long-term plans. She’s backpedaling, I get it, I may not like it, but I understand.

  She’s holding me at bay and has got to be the most difficult person to ever get alone. With the exception of our night in her shop, I’ve hit a snag every time since. Our lives are mutually crazy. I’m the only doctor in town and she has two little ones that she is still holding onto so tight there’s little room for much else.

  The fear is there, the hesitation is strong and I told her I’d wait for her, which I meant.

  But waiting is a struggle because what I really want to do is dive in headfirst and start living a life with the three of them.

  “It’s definitely doable,” Dean says reminding me I am not alone as I shake off the thoughts rolling around in my mind. “Are you thinking of refinishing these floors or getting all new?”

  “Polishing the current wood flooring but replacing all the carpet in the bedrooms and the family room. I’m thinking new light fixtures in every room, update the faucets in the bathrooms. The kitchen needs some more extensive upgrades.”

  He turns around and starts walking toward the kitchen.

  “I’m not a huge fan of the cabinets, since someone has painted over the existing ones and you can see the places they were chipped up and worn.” It was one of the first things that caught my attention when I first entered the kitchen during the showing.

  “We could strip them, sand them all down and refinish them.” Dean runs his hand over the corner cabinet, before knocking his knuckles against the wood. “There solid, made from the good stuff.” He nods, seemingly pleased. “We could definitely save these, bring them back to life, save you a whole lot of money.”

  “I’m thinking a weathered gray color.”

  “Definitely a good choice with the current color scheme throughout the rest of the house.” He seems confident.

  “I saw an Arabescus white marble sample for the countertops I thought would be perfect with gray cabinets. A big farm sink,” I can almost picture it.

  “You planning on spending a lot of time in the kitchen?” Dean’s question surprises me.

  “I enjoy cooking,” he doesn’t seem convinced.

  “Or is this all more for someone else than yourself?”

  Everyone in this town seems to be very invested in my love life.

  “How are things going with you and Zoey anyway?”

  “It’s more like having another best friend, that I get to sneak a kiss in with every once in a while.” I chuckle when his brows lift. “I’m not complaining, honestly getting to spend any amount of time with her is great. But I do find myself wondering how long it will take her to believe I’m not running from this. She’s protective of the girls, and she should be, but she needs to know she doesn’t have to protect them from me. I’d never hurt those girls, or her.”

  “But did you ever think that all those years ago you did hurt her?” I wrinkle my forehead in confusion. “Not purposely,” he adds, moving closer to the island that separates us and placing his hands on the dark green top. “She was two years behind you in school. I remember what she was like with you. All dreamy eyes, completely in awe of you. Zoey would have done anything for you; she fucking worshipped the ground you walked on. You leaving, though she played it off like it didn’t kill her, I can assure you it did. Something changed in her after that. She was quiet, spent most of her time floating through her days. She rarely went out with friends and when she did it was like she would have rather been anywhere but there.”

  He would know, he remained here in Magnolia Grove.

  “She withdrew, and everyone got used to her not being part of the crowd. Eventually we stopped asking her, knowing that it’d be a waste because she’d make up some excuse not to go.”

  Again wishing more than anything in my life that I’d stayed in touch with her. Our lives could have been so different. So many opportunities missed.

  “We all saw what a shit Carson was; when he came around, any outsider could sense he was a douche. I know it’s not your fault, I know that staying together would have probably been even harder than letting go. But the ass, he changed the sweet girl she once was, and I think she’s still trying to filter out all of the memories that now drown out the good. Maybe she just needs to be reminded of how it was with you two.”

  “Only now it’s us four,” I correct him and he smiles.

  “Exactly.” He seems pleased with my response. “Time to clean out all the doubt and fill it with hope.”

  twenty-two

  . . .

  Zoey

  “Momma,” Riley comes running down the hallway as the doorbell rings once again. “It’s Prince Jay,” she squeals so loudly that I cover my ears with my hands. Jumping up and down she grips my leggings and tugs as she starts to walk backward toward the door. “Hurry,” she demands just as Regan steps out of their bedroom, with her giraffe in one hand as she rubs at her eyes.

  Instantly I remember the fact we all just climbed out of bed and I must look a mess.

  “Momma,” Riley whines once again as I smooth my hair.

  “Okay, okay,” I say, knowing I’m not going to be able to get out of this, I move through the house. Toys from last night are still scattered over the living room floor, and an empty wine glass sits on the coffee table. After the girls had gone to bed, Lucy, Emma, and I had a group phone call which triggered the three of us indulging in a bottle of wine each. Cleaning up after that was not top on my list as I barely made it to my own bed.

  Before I get the chance to open the door, Riley and Regan are working as a team to unlock the door. The sound of the chain echoes as they pull it open finding resistance. I laugh when they both look back at me with annoyance in their little eyes. So much sass pours from the both of them.

  “Let go of the handle,” I tell Riley. Of course she crosses her arms over her chest and arches her little brow. Biting my lip to keep from laughing I push the door shut long enough to unhook the chain and then I step back.

  What surprises me more than anything is when Regan rushes forward and hugs Jay’s legs. “Yay!” She hops in place, and he looks up at me as he leans over and rubs her back.

  “Morning sweet girl.” The smile on his face sends a warm rush of emotions through me. Riley moves in next and the three of them share an adorable moment in a group hug that both worries me and thrills me at the same time.

  “Sorry to show up without calling first,” he offers with a shrug as he stands. Holding up a bag he gives it a shake. “I was at the store and I saw the chocolate chips and remembered how much you used to love chocolate chip pancakes.”

  “With a mixture of⁠—”

  “The milk chocolate and the white chocolate,” he says at the same time as I do.

  “So I took chance.” Jay shrugs in the cutest way like he’s nervous and unsure, but hopeful. “Figured I’d make the three of you breakfast, then maybe we could have a movie night later after I take you all for a ride.”

  “A ride?” When I cross my arms over my chest, I’m reminded that I’m in a tank top, leggings, and no bra.

  “Yeah.” He grins and I see his gaze drop, as if he can actually read my thoughts. “Got something to show you.”

  Curious, I stare at him, and he chuckles. “Breakfast first, then I’ll show you.”

  Riley answers before I can and grabs his free hand pulling him into the house. I notice the way he looks over our space. The house is small and cluttered. Twins means two of everything, and leaves little room left for much of anything else.

  As we enter the kitchen, he places the bag on the counter and turns around to find me a few feet away. The girls have already started digging through the cabinets for pans and spatulas.

  Jay takes this as his opportunity to lean in and talk low enough that only I can hear. “Are you sure this is okay?”

  “Yeah.” I try not to nervously nibble on my lip. It’s a habit I’ve developed over time when I’m unsure of something.

  “You don’t seem a hundred percent sure,” Jay slips into my side, his shoulder bumping against mine. “I woke up this morning and my first thought was that I wanted to spend it with the three of you. I’ve been having those thoughts a lot lately, and until today I’ve tucked it away because I don’t want to crowd you.”

  “And today?”

  He tilts his head looking over at me, offering a familiar mischievous grin. “The pull was entirely too strong to ignore.”

  “Is that so?”

  “Yes.” When he comes closer my heart races. Gently, he presses his lips to my cheek and my yes flutter shut. “By the way, I love the outfit.” When he moves back, he wags his brows and I reach out to pinch his side making him laugh.

  As he moves around my kitchen, the girls on chairs which he moved close, one on each side of him they watch him in awe. It all feels natural, and again, my nerves threaten to get the best of me.

  I excuse myself, going to my room to grab a sweater I brace myself on my dresser, closing my eyes. It would be so easy to fall into a pattern with Jay, to allow myself to fall without reservation. Fact is I still love him, that never faded, but I’m different now. Everything is different and it’s not only my heart on the line anymore.

  “You okay?” I spin around, knocking over a bottle on my dresser in the process. There in the doorway of my bedroom is Jay, with his hands braced on each side.

  “I’m good,” even I sense the hesitation in my voice.

  Slowly he moves closer, pausing with only a small fraction of space left between us. With his eyes staring directly back into mine my pulse quickens. “If you’re good then why are you hiding out in here?”

  “I was getting a shirt,” I point at the sweater I am now wearing over my tank top.

  “Your excuse would almost be believable if you didn’t disappear more than ten minutes ago.” He lifts his hand up moving away a hair that has fallen from my braid. Tucking it behind my ear, his fingertip drags over my cheek and I shiver.

  “Where are the girls?”

  “Eating the heart shaped pancakes I made them.”

  “Hearts?” I can’t help but smile.

  “They wanted crowns, but my talents do not extend that far,” with a shrug, he leans in a little closer. “I didn’t show up here to make you feel uncomfortable.”

  “It’s not that,” I assure him, unable to look him directly in the eye. My chest growing tight, as anxiety grows within me.

  Suddenly he shifts, cupping the sides of my face and tipping my chin upward. “Look at me,” he whispers and I slowly open my eyes to find him watching me. A sincere look in his eyes, his lip tipped at the corner. “Why are you in here, and not out there with us?”

  I could lie, I could make up some wild story or even insist this is nothing and then drag him back out to the kitchen. All those options seem doable, but instead I lock eyes with him and the inability to hold back hits me. “Seeing you in my kitchen, cooking with the girls, so relaxed as if you’ve been doing it forever,” I shrug. “I just needed a minute to let it all sink in.”

  “You wanna kick me out, don’t you?” He’s grinning but it doesn’t reach his eyes I can sense the fear that is hidden there.

  “No,” the words just tumble out of my mouth, “I want to keep you forever.” A burning sensation hits me and my entire chest feels as though it’s on fire. My throat burns and tears fill my eyes. “But I’m scared to want it.”

  “Don’t be,” he rests his forehead to mine, breathing me in as we both close our eyes. “Want me, Zoey,” he whispers. “Want me the way I want you.”

  Shifting even closer his lips press to mine and for the first time in so long, I let myself feel. I allow myself to want what he’s offering as my body melts to his.

  twenty-three

  . . .

  Jayson

  I grip the back of her neck with one hand, lowering the other to her waist. Circling it around her I pull her body to mine and deepen our kiss. So sweet, just the way I remember.

  “I don’t want you to be scared,” I tell her between kisses.

  She fits so perfectly in my arms, her body molded to my own. The soft whimper that escapes her lips as she fists my shirt.

  “I’ve never wanted anything more,” I need her to feel the truth. “I love you, I never stopped loving you. I thought letting you go was the right thing but the truth is everything I ever needed has been right here at home.”

  She takes a deep breath, looking up at me through her long lashes.

  “Let me love you Zoey,” when she blinks a tear falls over her cheek and I capture it with my thumb. “Let me love you all.”

  I get it, doing this with her means I’m in it with the girls too. Nothing about that scares me because I’ve fallen in love with them too.

  “Did you make extra heart pancakes?” Zoey’s leaning in, pressing a kiss to my jaw and I continue to hold her close. I’m not ready to let her go yet.

  “I saved the batter,” I confess squeezing her tighter. “I’ll make more if you promise me one thing.”

  “What’s that,” her breath tickles my neck?

  “No more walls,” she tries to pull away but I don’t let her go. “I get it, I know you’re only trying to keep you and the girls safe. I get it, damn Zoey I understand. But you’ve got to know you don’t have to protect them from me. I let you go once before, but that’s a mistake I won’t make again.”

  This time I do allow her to pull back enough so she can look up and our gazes lock on each other. She stares at me, but this time I don’t say anything, instead I wait for her.

  “There was some talk of a ride and movie night.”

  “Yeah, there sure was.”

  “So, I guess you better make me those pancakes so we can start the rest of our day then.” Without hesitation I lean closer and kiss her again finally feeling like we’ve taken a step in the right direction.

  “Wow,” Zoey walks into the kitchen and drags her palm over the newly installed countertop. Dean really pulled through and in record time. I’ve got to say I’m impressed.

  “This is beautiful,” she spins around taking it all in.

  Suddenly Riley and Regan come running down the hall squealing and laughing. Zoey hurries toward them, stopping them in the dining area. “No running,” she scolds them. “This is Jayson’s home and you know we don’t run in other’s homes.”

  Zoey glances up at me with an apologetic look in her eyes. “Sorry.”

  “For what?” The space is wide open, I’ve yet to buy furniture or even move in. “There is nothing to break and a home isn’t truly a home without chaos and laughter.”

  And people you love to share it with, but I leave that part out. Hearing the twins laugh and scream playfully is exactly what I imagined when I first saw this place.

  “They are destructive.” She insists and I can’t say I believe her, they look so innocent.

  “Do you want to see the rest?” The girls jump up and down happily and I hold out my hand motioning toward the steps leading upstairs.