Lifes tough be tougher, p.14

  Life’s Tough - Be Tougher, p.14

Life’s Tough - Be Tougher
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  At the heart of psychological safety is honesty. If people are open with each other—about successes, failures and everything in between—it creates a culture of trust and respect. And when trust is strong, teams thrive.

  The following are ways you can build psychological safety in any group environment:

  Encourage people to share their thoughts: Everyone should feel like their voice matters. Whether it’s in meetings, brainstorming sessions or one-on-one chats, it’s important to make space for people to speak up. Some people may need a little encouragement, so ask open-ended questions and show genuine interest in their opinions.

  Talk to people, not about them: If you have something to say about someone’s work or actions, speak to them directly instead of talking behind their back. Open conversations build trust, while gossip and other forms of indirect communication create tension and uncertainty. If there’s an issue, addressing it head-on in a respectful way will lead to better solutions.

  Encourage healthy debates: Disagreeing isn’t a bad thing—it’s how good ideas get better. But for conflict to be productive, again, it needs to be respectful. Instead of shutting people down, team members should be able to challenge each other’s ideas in a way that feels safe and constructive. Imagine a marketing team deciding on a new campaign. If team members feel safe, they can challenge each other’s ideas without worrying about offending anyone. That kind of open discussion leads to stronger results.

  Lead by example: Leaders set the tone for a team. If they admit to making mistakes, ask for help when they need it and welcome feedback, others will feel more comfortable doing the same. A leader who says, ‘I got that wrong, and here’s what I learned,’ shows the team that it’s okay to be human.

  Be clear and open when communicating: Unclear communication creates confusion and stress. Whether you’re giving feedback, explaining expectations or sharing decisions, clarity matters. Instead of saying something vague such as, ‘You need to improve your work,’ a better message would be, ‘I think your report was strong, but adding more data next time could make it even better.’ This makes it easier for the other person to understand and act on the feedback.

  Hold people accountable—but fairly: Accountability isn’t about blaming people when things go wrong, it’s about making sure everyone takes responsibility for their work. When mistakes happen, the focus should be on learning and improving, not pointing fingers.

  Create a non-judgemental environment: People won’t speak up if they feel they’ll be judged for it. Whether someone has a new idea, a concern or a question, they should feel confident that they can bring it up without being mocked or dismissed. People who feel valued are more engaged and creative.

  Replace blame with curiosity: Instead of asking, ‘Who messed this up?’ try asking, ‘What can we learn from this?’ Blame creates fear, but curiosity leads to growth. Imagine a project doesn’t go as planned. Rather than criticising a team member, it’s better to explore what went wrong and brainstorm ways to improve next time.

  Ask for feedback: Leaders and colleagues who do this show that they are open to improvement, too. When leaders say, ‘How can I support you better?’ or ‘Is there anything I could do differently?’ it helps create a culture where feedback is normal and welcomed.

  Build trust and show reliability: Trust is built through actions, not just words. If people say they will do something, they should follow through. When people consistently show up for each other and keep their word, trust grows, and as a result the team becomes stronger.

  Keep checking in on the team’s sense of safety: Psychological safety isn’t something you set up one day and then forget about. It needs to be nurtured over time. Regularly asking, ‘Do people feel comfortable speaking up?’ or ‘Are we creating an open and honest environment?’ helps keep psychological safety a priority.

  WHEN PSYCHOLOGICAL SAFETY IS LACKING

  NICK

  A new boss arrived at Fitzroy CIB towards the end of my time there in the mid-nineties. It wasn’t long before he started eroding morale, introducing several unpopular changes into the office and micromanaging how we went about our work.

  Prior to his arrival, we had been a very high-functioning team of detectives. We were consistently generating solid results. Yet as the new directives continued to be introduced, nobody was enjoying what had become a very different work environment. We’d gone from being a free-flowing, highly efficient criminal investigation unit to a micromanaged kindergarten. I acknowledge it was the boss’s prerogative to make decisions as he deemed fit, but change for the sake of stamping your authority rarely works well. With trust eroded and autonomy stifled, our collective motivation and job satisfaction had significantly declined.

  I was clearly still very naive at the time, because I took it upon myself to have a private conversation with the boss to share how we were feeling as a group. Unfortunately, my openness and honesty weren’t well-received. At the conclusion of our conversation, the boss reminded me that he was in charge. He also informed me that from now on I was to refer to him strictly as ‘Detective Senior Sergeant Smith’ (not his real surname)—not by his first name, or even ‘Boss’ as was the usual protocol. Furthermore, I was to move my work desk up into an annex of our computer room in a move designed to separate me (apparently the troublemaker) from the colleagues that I enjoyed working next to.

  There were no winners as a result of my little chat with the boss. As well as my being imprisoned next to the computer room, my fortnightly roster of shifts had turned to shit, and there were repercussions for most of my colleagues, too. Lesson learned.

  I certainly hadn’t heard of psychological safety way back then, and I doubt my then-boss had either. It probably wasn’t even a thing in the mid-nineties, and I’m pretty sure any suggestion of creating a psychologically safe workplace would have been met with much laughter and plenty of raised eyebrows.

  My attempt at having an honest conversation with the boss did result in some positive changes. A few months later I transferred out of Fitzroy CIB and found a new home in one of the crime squads in the city. A number of my colleagues also made the move to greener pastures.

  In the end, the absence of psychological safety fractured and dismantled what had once been a highly capable and high-performing team of detectives.

  A Culture of Honesty, Trust and Growth

  Psychological safety comes from a culture built on honesty, accountability and care for others.

  Honesty is key to psychological safety. If people don’t get honest feedback, they miss out on chances to improve. Avoiding difficult conversations might feel easier in the moment, but in the long run, it stops people from growing and can lead to bigger problems.

  When honesty is paired with kindness, it builds stronger teams. Being direct doesn’t mean being harsh—it means being clear, fair and respectful. Imagine a manager who says, ‘I think you’ve done a great job on this, but I noticed a few areas that could be improved. Let’s work on them together.’ That approach helps people feel supported instead of criticised.

  When people feel valued and trusted, they are more likely to contribute ideas, work together effectively and take the kinds of risks that lead to real innovation.

  By creating an open, honest and supportive workplace, team members can build stronger relationships, solve problems more effectively and bring out the best in each other. And that’s the kind of environment where people and businesses truly thrive.

  WHAT GOOGLE’S PROJECT ARISTOTLE TEACHES US ABOUT GREAT TEAMS

  Back in 2012, Google set out to answer a big question: what makes some teams succeed while others struggle? The organisation launched Project Aristotle, a deep-dive into teamwork, analysing more than 180 of their internal teams to uncover the key ingredients for success. Surprisingly, they found that a team’s success wasn’t about hiring the smartest people or having the most experienced professionals. Instead, it came down to how well its members worked together.

  The research identified five key factors that make teams thrive, with psychological safety standing out as the most important. Let’s break these down in simple terms and explore why they matter.

  1. Psychological Safety—The Key to Great Teams

  While all five factors are important, psychological safety was the biggest game changer. Teams that felt safe speaking up were more open to sharing ideas, admitting when things weren’t working and learning from mistakes—all of which are crucial for growth and innovation. Google found that teams with psychological safety focused on their work rather than worrying about self-preservation. In other words, when people aren’t afraid of looking stupid, they can do their best work.

  One of the engineering teams Google looked at struggled initially because team members felt awkward asking questions in meetings. But when the leader started actively encouraging input from quieter people and praising members for admitting to mistakes, the whole team became more engaged, took more ownership of their work and performed significantly better.

  2. Dependability—Knowing You Can Rely on Each Other

  A team only works if people pull their weight. Successful teams trust one other to get things done, meet deadlines and take responsibility for their tasks. If some members are unreliable, others end up picking up the slack, which leads to frustration and inefficiency.

  Think of a football team where only a few players put in the effort. It doesn’t matter how talented those players are, the team will always struggle to win games if other teammates aren’t dependable.

  3. Structure and Clarity—Clear Roles, Less Confusion

  Ever been in a group project where no one knows who’s supposed to do what? That’s what happens when a team lacks structure. Google found that the best teams had clearly defined roles, responsibilities and goals.

  For example, in a product development team, knowing who’s responsible for coding, testing and design helps to make everything run smoothly. Without clarity, people tend to step on each other’s toes or drop the ball on key tasks.

  4. Meaning—Work that Feels Important

  People work better when they feel their job matters. If team members believe in what they’re doing, they’re more engaged and motivated. It doesn’t have to be life-changing work—even something as simple as knowing your efforts make a difference to customers or colleagues can boost morale. Meaning in this context is highly aligned to ‘inner purpose’ as well. Again we are subtly touching on the importance of our WHY. Having purpose in our work is critical to how we approach and complete it so, yes, an alignment with our values and what matters most to us is important.

  5. Impact—Knowing Your Work Makes a Difference

  Beyond personal meaning, people want to feel their work contributes to something bigger. When team members see how their efforts affect the company, customers or even the wider world, they feel a greater sense of purpose. Google found that teams performed better when they understood the impact of their work, whether that was improving user experience, building innovative technology or helping people in some way.

  Why These Lessons Matter Beyond Google

  The beauty of Project Aristotle’s findings is that they apply to any team, anywhere—not just at Google. Schools, hospitals, charities and even families can benefit from these insights.

  For example, a classroom where students aren’t afraid to ask questions is a much better learning environment than one where they keep quiet out of fear of looking silly. Similarly, a healthcare team that listens to every member’s input, whether it’s a surgeon or a nurse speaking, is more likely to deliver better patient care.

  At the end of the day, the strength of any team isn’t about having the smartest people, it’s about how well they work together. By building trust, encouraging openness and making sure everyone feels valued, teams can unlock their full potential.

  This is one of the most valuable lessons from Google’s research, and it’s something we can all apply in our workplaces, schools and everyday lives.

  FROM CRISIS TO COURAGE: THE TRANSFORMATIVE POWER OF PSYCHOLOGICAL SAFETY

  DAVID

  In sport and in life, true character often emerges when pressure and scrutiny are at their greatest. In 2016 I was invited to lead a training program for Essendon Football Club players who were dealing with the aftermath of one of the AFL’s most significant doping scandals. Thirty-four players had received suspensions from the Court of Arbitration for Sport following a World Anti-Doping Agency appeal against an earlier AFL tribunal decision. The bans were a result of the club’s controversial supplements program during the 2012 season, when players were administered substances deemed prohibited under anti-doping regulations. These young athletes, who had trusted their club’s leadership and personnel, suddenly faced severe professional consequences, intense media scrutiny, public judgement and profound personal distress.

  Throughout my time in elite sport, I had been trained and was fully immersed in the ethical and compliance frameworks that underpin supplementation. We always pushed for the edge; but the boundaries were firm and non-negotiable. The rules were black and white. So when I stepped into this role, I was deeply unsettled. How could something meant to protect and optimise athletes’ potential lead to such harm? How had trust been so badly broken?

  When I first walked into the room, the emotional weight was unmistakable. I could feel the tension. Some players sat in silence while others were barely hiding their frustration or doubt. I remember thinking, Why would they trust me? Why would they buy into this? In that moment I realised that I had to earn their trust. Not through speeches or titles, but by being real; vulnerable; human. They needed to see the person behind the coach. I learned very quickly that not only were the athletes going to be working hard, I was going to be working very hard too.

  Their world had been turned upside down. Public scrutiny, uncertainty, shattered belief systems—it had left them fragile and defensive. I could see it in their body language, in the way they held back (understandably so). I had never faced anything like this before.

  This program I was implementing had to be more than physical training—I had to create a sanctuary, a space where psychological safety was at the core. Without trust, there would be no recovery. But with it, there was a chance I could help them find their way back—not just to performance, but to self-belief, purpose and maybe even joy.

  I partnered with Sean Wellman, a highly respected former Essendon premiership player, and we set out to create an environment built on openness, honesty and mutual support. We knew there would be hesitation, maybe even resistance, so we were mindful of how we approached it.

  Through plenty of discussion, we agreed on a simple but powerful idea: empower the players. Let them shape the direction. We knew this would look different from the traditional top-down methods of program implementation. It had to be collaborative—something they felt a part of. Not something done to them. Right from the start, we encouraged direct, honest conversations. We invited their feedback and genuinely listened without judgement, because the only way forward was as one.

  One thing quickly became apparent: these players listened to each other intently and respectfully. This kind of attentive listening is a clear sign of psychological safety, and it became a defining strength of the group. As the weeks progressed, trust deepened, accountability remained firm but fair, and conversations shifted from blame to learning opportunities. Players supported each other openly, respectfully challenged ideas and collectively faced setbacks with resilience and determination.

  There is something powerful about seeing an athlete begin to believe again, to rebuild, to grow stronger. Not just physically, but as a whole person. I have always found meaning in watching that unfold. What fuelled me then, and still does, is witnessing transformation. When body, mind and spirit align, it is not just performance, it is potential realised. And every athlete deserves the chance to experience that with clarity, confidence and care.

  None of this would have been possible without the quiet but significant support of former Essendon president Paul Little and a dedicated supporter group. Their belief and backing created the conditions these young men needed in order to rebuild and reconnect.

  The players who took part were nothing short of remarkable. They’d been let down, unfairly treated and caught in a storm not of their making. Yet, through it all, they showed incredible strength. They held themselves with maturity, embraced the hard work and committed to moving forward, physically and emotionally. Many made it back to AFL level and performed with real impact. But perhaps what mattered more was what they reclaimed along the way: their confidence, their purpose and their self-belief. That kind of resilience can’t be coached—it’s earned through courage.

  This experience reinforced something I have witnessed repeatedly: psychological safety is not about shielding people from challenges; it’s about providing the conditions and the confidence required to face those challenges head-on. When individuals feel secure enough to speak openly, ask questions and grow without fear, remarkable performance follows. For these players, psychological safety was the critical turning point, enabling one of the bravest and most inspiring comebacks I have ever seen in sport.

  VULNERABILITY: A GATEWAY TO AUTHENTICITY AND STRENGTH

  Vulnerability is often misunderstood. It’s seen as a weakness or flaw, a door through which criticism or judgement might enter. Yet vulnerability is one of the most profound signifiers of courage and humanity. It’s the act of saying, ‘This is who I am,’ and accepting whatever response follows.

 
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