When she wakes in the morning, I’ll shower with her and make sure she’s good and clean, because, right now, she needs to sleep. I run my hands through her soft hair and close my eyes, and soon enough I’m sleeping too.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Jordy

  “Breakfast is done.”

  Luka’s voice pulls me from a half-sleep. I roll over with a groan, still not ready to get up. If I’m being honest, I’m never ready to get up. I’m not a morning person... actually, I’m just not a getting-out-of-bed person. If I could spend my days in this bed, I would. It’s safe and warm and by far one of my favorite places.

  “Where’s Juni?” I ask when I hear Luka digging through the dresser drawers, probably putting clothes away.

  “She went into town to get some groceries.”

  I roll over onto my back and peel my eyes open, blinking a few times to get used to the light streaming in through the open curtains. It’s way too bright.

  “Wasn’t it my turn?”

  “She said she wanted to go, so she went.”

  She does that a lot. Always taking initiative and control, on top of doing things for us because she thinks she’s helping. I have no problem going into town when it’s my turn, and she knows it. Honestly, I think she still needs some time to herself to work through seeing Jensen. His being here is messing with all of us.

  I sit up and rub my eyes with the heels of my palms and then run my fingers through my hair to try and straighten it out. I don’t want to get out of bed, but I need to. We have stuff to do. There isn’t much time left before Juni’s time as trial alpha is up, and we need to come up with a solid plan, on top of more training so she can assure the pack she’s ready for this. There is still a chance they can call the Trials off, but I doubt it’ll happen. There aren’t enough people who believe she can do this.

  I’m not naive, I know some of them will never accept her solely because she’s a woman, others because she was rejected, but they don’t matter. There are plenty more people who love her and have faith in her to do the duty as alpha. It’s hers by right.

  “Luka?”

  “Hm?” he says, not even looking at me, just continuing to put things away in the dresser.

  “I talked to Jensen yesterday.”

  If he’s surprised by that, he doesn’t show it. Not a flinch, wince, scoff, nothing. He just keeps going about his business, pulling clean, folded clothes from the wicker basket and putting them away in the drawers. Finally, when my anxiety over admitting that is at its peak, he turns around, resting his back against the tall dresser and crossing his thick arms over his bare chest.

  He’s... so fucking sexy, especially right now with the sunlight streaming in, highlighting the blond in his hair that’s full and wavy around his shoulders.

  “Figured you would.” His voice pulls me from my ogling, and I laugh internally at how something as simple as him having his shirt off can still be so distracting after all this time. “How much of a dick was he?”

  I shake my head. “That’s the thing.” I look up to meet Luka’s eyes. “He wasn’t. At all. It was really confusing, actually.” Luka’s response is a raised eyebrow, so I continue. “He apologized, and pretty much said he wasn’t here for any of us.”

  “Then why is he here?”

  I shrug and get out of bed, raising my arms above my head to stretch. “Business, apparently.”

  “Business? What kind of business?”

  “Didn’t ask. Didn’t tell.”

  I see the gears turning in his head and the lost look in his eyes. He’s suspicious of anyone who isn’t me or Juni. I can’t blame him for it. He grew up outside of a pack and was on his own at a very young age. He had to learn just about everything the hard way, and not trusting people was the first lesson.

  “Has he seen Jase?” he asks.

  “Don’t know that either. Why? What are you thinking?”

  He scratches his head, running his hand through his long hair. “Just trying to figure out what kind of business he could be doing in Kierheart. No one here wants to do business with him, so that can only mean it’s someone on the outside and that isn’t good.”

  “I... hadn’t thought of that.” After the conversation with Jensen, the last thing I was dwelling on was his mention of being here for business. The look he had in his eyes before I left... I couldn’t get it out of my head. He looked so lost, confused, sad almost. My last words to him, I truly meant them. Jensen is confused about a lot of things; I sensed it from him the moment I stepped up beside him in the woods to walk back to the inn.

  I don’t want to hope this is the truth, but I think Jensen may have some regrets about leaving. I’m not entirely sure what that means or what it looks like for us, so I’m trying not to put too much thought into it, but I can’t forget his eyes...

  Luka’s quiet for another long moment before he turns around to pull a shirt of out the top drawer. “Go eat. We need to talk to Jase.”

  After leaving Juni a note about where we will be, Luka and I make the quick trip over to Jase’s cabin, knowing he’ll be home since he’s been working nights in town to prepare for the birth of his cub. Mara will be at work, so I know we at least won’t be disturbing her.

  When we get there, Luka knocks on the door, and it doesn’t take long for Jase to open it and invite us in with a welcoming smile that sends a pang to my chest. I hate how much he looks like Jensen... or how much they look alike, I guess. Neither looks like the other, they just are...

  “I can only guess you’re here because of Jensen,” he says as he closes the door.

  “Kind of,” I answer.

  Luka and I take a seat on the couch in the living room, and Jase sits in the recliner across from us. It’s been a while since we’ve been here. There was a short time when I was here often, trying to help Jase get his life together and stay on track, but then as he settled in and took control of his own life, we fell out of touch. He and Mara found out they were mates, and they’re still unsure if they have any others, but then she got pregnant and he was busy. He didn’t need my help anymore and that’s a good thing. He’s strong enough now to handle his issues on his own, or at least with the help of Mara and their baby that’s on the way.

  It wasn’t easy for me to spend so much time with him because even though he’s very different from Jensen personality-wise, they are identical twins. There are small things they do differently, like the way they walk and stand, but when Jase is sitting there, like he is now, not doing anything, I’d swear he was Jensen, and on some days, that’s just too much for me to handle. Especially the times I saw him breaking down, unable to handle all the shit inside his head, and I wondered if Jensen was doing the same or if he was happy where he was. It was a confusing time for me, but I found helping Jase kept me busy and made me feel good about myself after feeling like shit for being rejected, and maybe it helped me not feel so alone.

  “What does ‘kind of’ mean?” Jase asks carefully.

  “Have you talked to him?” Luka asks.

  “A little. He was here yesterday.”

  “Do you know why he’s in Kierheart?” Luka wastes no time getting to the point, nor does he hide his accusatory tone.

  “Not really. Just said it was for work. Something to do with a client.” Jase shifts in his seat as he says it, coming off as nervous, but why would he be nervous? He and Jensen don’t have the best relationship, and I don’t think Jase would cover something up for Jensen. Jensen certainly would not do that for him. Jase has done so much to get where he’s at. He’s in a good place and happy with his life. He won’t do something to fuck this up. This pack is important to him, and he wouldn’t risk it for his brother who abandoned him when he needed him the most. Yet, they are brothers and who am I to say how deep that bond runs? Deeper than a mate bond? If I’m willing to take Jensen back into my life, why wouldn’t Jase?

  Wait... did I really just admit that? Am I really willing to do that?

  “That doesn’t seem odd to you?” Luka asks, bringing my attention back to the room.

  Jase huffs out a laugh. “No? It’s Jensen.” He shrugs and shifts again. I narrow my eyes at him, his nervous tics becoming more noticeable.

  Luka leans forward, resting his arms on his thighs. “I don’t know, Jase. I know people change and all, but do you really think he’d come back here to do something for a client? I mean, it’s Kierheart. There’s a population of thirty-four. What could one of his clients possibly get from it?”

  “Why are you asking me this?” Jase looks from Luka to me, then back. “Shouldn’t you be asking him?”

  Luka turns to me with a raised brow. “Yeah, let’s do that. We can head into Kierheart and let him know we had a chat with Jase.” Luka gets to his feet and moves towards the door.

  “Yeah, okay. Good idea,” I say, following Luka’s lead. I get up and Jase groans, pushing out of his seat.

  “Okay, wait.” Luka and I both stop and turn towards Jase. “Before you go to him, there’s something I should tell you.”

  “Oh?” Luka winks at me and I hold back the smirk I feel, my chest filling with pride over how intuitive my mate is.

  “S-sit down,” Jase tells us, waving his hand towards the couch while the other rubs at the back of his neck—something he and Jensen both do when nervous or thinking.

  I hate playing off people like this. Not that Jase is a fragile guy, but he kind of is. He has a history with drugs and drinking and I worry any tension will send him backwards. He has a lot to lose now, and I only hope it’s enough to keep him on the straight and narrow. Luka, on the other hand, can be ruthless. At the same time, Jase isn’t my responsibility. He’s an adult and has all the tools he needs to be successful, so if he relapses, it’s not my fault. It happens from time to time.

  Luka jerks his head towards the couch and we both go back and sit where we were just moments before.

  “Don’t be pissed, okay?” I raise my brows and glance at Luka, starting to get concerned over what Jase could have possibly done. “I swear I did this because I had to. Trust me, I wouldn’t risk all this... not now, not since Mara and our baby... You have to believe me.”

  “Just tell us, Jase,” Luka says sternly.

  “Look, I haven’t said anything to you because I know you don’t need the stress, but there’s been talk in the pack over the last month now.”

  “Talk? What kind of talk?” Luka asks.

  “That Juniper isn’t qualified to take over her father’s position.” The growl that sounds in Luka’s chest echoes throughout the room. We had our suspicions and heard some whispers, but other people know too? That means they’re talking, and when they talk… “Not with just the two of you,” Jase adds in a quieter voice.

  “Go on,” Luka grits out through clenched teeth.

  My head is spinning, wondering if Juni knows about this. With them calling the Trials, we knew there were people who weren’t voting for her but if there’s talk, it’s more than just a few like we thought.

  “Okay... well, basically Jensen is here because of me. I mean, he is here because of a client, but because I put the idea of Kierheart in that client’s head. I took a trip to Seattle to try and get Jensen back here by telling him Juniper needed him, but I knew it wouldn’t work, so instead, I did some digging.”

  “So what exactly is he doing here, then?” Luka asks. I can tell his patience is running out and he’s growing increasingly irritated. His body is tense, and his jaw is clenched tightly.

  Jase swallows hard before continuing. “He’s... surveying the land.”

  “Surveying the land?” I ask, not sure I heard that right because it doesn’t make sense.

  “For what?” Luka snaps. “What land?”

  “This land... the woods.” He swallows again, and his next words are rushed. “For a resort.”

  “A resort!?” Luka shouts, getting to his feet. I grab onto his wrist, hoping to ground him and keep him on this side of the room instead of tearing Jase’s throat out like he probably wants to. I’m not sure if the small touch will be enough, but I have to try.

  “It won’t get that far! I promise,” Jase shouts in a panic, moving further away from Luka.

  “How do you know that?!”

  “I just do. You have to trust me. That mate bond is—”

  “Mate bond?” I ask, and this time it’s me getting to my feet. “What are you talking about?”

  It’s quiet for a long moment before Luka pulls his wrist from my hand and stomps towards Jase. He bends down close, pointing his finger in his face.

  “You sent that asshole here under the assumption of work, but was banking on the mate bond to bring him back to us? How fucking dare you...”

  “Luka,” I warn, moving towards him. As much as I agree with Luka being mad about this, because this is completely out of line for Jase, he needs to calm down. Fighting won’t help anything.

  “You had no damn right, Jase. No fucking right to put your nose in our business like that!” Luke takes a step back and runs his hands through his hair. I can see his chest heaving from here. “No fucking right!” he shouts before turning towards the door and leaving. He slams the door open so hard the top hinges break off the frame and the door falls sideways, the bottom hinge stopping it from falling completely.

  “I had to do it! I couldn’t risk losing our pack.” The desperation in Jase’s voice has me feeling for him. I get it, but I can’t tell him that. At the end of the day, what he did was wrong, and I don’t know if it even makes sense. That’s a serious risk. A big chance to take. There were so many other ways he could have dealt with this. Putting his nose in our relationship was not the answer. Especially like this.

  “Don’t you see that’s what you’ve done, Jase? Jensen doesn’t care about our fucking mate bond.” I shake my head, still trying to process what was said here. “You just handed over our pack lands to some dickhead human,” I say as I walk through the front door.

  This is a worse mess than I initially thought.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Jensen

  I spend the morning in bed, contemplating my entire fucking existence and completely regretting coming here at all. Which isn’t different than any other day I’ve been here, but today it feels stronger.

  I’m not sure the money I’ll get from this is worth all the shit it’s causing. I should have told Norwick to suck my dick and just waited on the meeting with Brookes. With Marco putting in a good word for me, it’s practically a sure thing.

  Why the fuck did I have to be so greedy?

  Now, here I am, all kinds of fucked up in my head over that kiss with Skye and the look Jordy gave me before he left. Not to mention the fact my brother is having a fucking baby. I’m going to be an uncle. A fucking uncle...

  Never, not even once, did I expect him to settle down. I never saw this for him, never thought this would be the path he took. In fact, when we were younger, I could have sworn he would be the one to reject his mates or be rejected. I thought he’d be alone. Yet... I’m the one on the outside now. I’m the one who doesn’t belong. How have I gone six years in complete ignorance over all that has happened here?

  I glance at the side table to see my phone. It’s off and still not working. Yesterday, I’d planned on finding a way to get it fixed or just getting a new one. I figured I could either take a taxi out of town or pray I could get one overnighted. Now? I’m not so sure I want to. Seeing my brother with his pregnant mate shifted something in my brain, and if I get my phone working, I’ll have to go back to work.

  How can I take the land away from them? This is their home. The only place they know. The place they live. The place they plan to raise their child. My little niece or nephew. Where will they go?

  I know I’m an asshole, but this is a lot. Even for me.

  Didn’t I realize this is what would happen when coming here, though? I knew this was the outcome, knew this is what I was here for. How the fuck did I ignore the bigger picture?

  And that asshole, Norwick’s guy, is coming today. What the hell am I going to do with him?

  Actually, since my phone is broken, maybe I won’t have to see him at all. Maybe he won’t be able to find me, and I’ll have better luck hiding from him.

  I roll over, pulling the pillow over my head, wishing I would just suffocate and end it all. Okay, that’s a bit dramatic and not true, and the fact Skye’s smiling face is what flashed into my head the moment I thought it is... jarring.

  I left this life. I wanted nothing to do with it. I knew they’d be better without me. They’d be happier, just the three of them, without all my bullshit. I couldn’t stay here. This town is... way too fucking small. Even with all the woods, it’s just not enough. It’s suffocating.

  Back in Seattle, I feel free. Even in a heavily populated city, there’s something about it, and when I’m lying out on the beach in Santorini, it’ll be even easier.

  It’s easier because there’s no ties there, moron. Nothing to hold you there, nothing to stop you from leaving, and certainly no one to leave you.

  That little voice inside my head has been getting louder and louder since I’ve been here. I swear it’s my bear talking shit to me, but we don’t exactly have conversations with one another. He isn’t like another being inside of me who can talk back and forth. I feel his feelings, he feels mine. Sometimes he acts like the hulk and freaks out, shifting without my consent and wreaking havoc. Otherwise, he stays pretty calm, but at times like this, when my fucking conscience won’t shut up, I blame him for it—

  Because it’s easier than blaming yourself.

  “Damnit,” I groan, rolling over and tossing the pillow to the end of the bed. It lands on the edge and falls to the floor with a soft plop as I stare at the ceiling, resting my hands under my head, and allow my thoughts to drift to Skye. Us at the nest. The way she smelled. Her bright, golden eyes. The kiss...