“So case closed?” Bella said.

  Ashley giggled.

  “This isn’t funny,” Jason snapped.

  Grady turned to Bella. “Do you recognize her?”

  “Um.” Bella didn’t see how anyone could recognize the woman, given the poor quality of the video. “I can’t make out the face.”

  “Damn it!” Jason smacked a filing cabinet. “These cameras are garbage. They don’t even have sound.”

  “Wouldn’t that be illegal?” Bella asked. “I think you need consent—”

  “Shoplifting is fucking illegal.”

  Kenny flinched.

  “Sorry, Kenny.” Jason scowled at the monitor. “I’m just pissed off.”

  Grady held up his hand. “All right. If any of you see someone fitting this description, call for help right away. And don’t let her out of your sight. I also want someone to keep an eye on the statues.”

  Bella couldn’t think of anything more boring and demoralizing than babysitting ugly statues all day or, worse, making small talk with customers who were interested in said statues. Not me, not me, not me…

  Grady scanned their faces. “Kenny, I’m assigning this to you.”

  “Yes, sir,” Kenny said brightly. “I’ll be the angels’ guardian angel. Get it?”

  No one laughed. Grady cleared his throat. “It’s almost nine. Let’s get to work.”

  As they filed out of the office, Ashley nudged Bella. “Hey. I got it.”

  Bella looked at her in confusion, then she remembered. Adderall. “Oh wow.”

  “Come into the break room for a sec.”

  Bella followed, and Ashley closed the door behind them.

  Ashley pulled a small white cardboard box from her purse, the type of box that usually signaled inexpensive jewelry. “You said you only wanted a couple, so I got you five. It’s thirty bucks even.”

  Bella stared at the box. “That’s not bad.” She retrieved her own purse from its cubby, opened her wallet, and counted the bills. “Here you go.”

  Ashley gave her the box. “Just let me know if you want more. Addys are pretty easy to get.”

  “Thanks. I will.” But Bella wasn’t planning to become a regular customer. She only wanted answers.

  “Oh, and be careful around Nadine. I heard y’all are living together. She’s on probation, right?”

  “Yeah, it’s called supervised release. Don’t worry, I’m not going to take them home.”

  Ashley nodded. “Okay, but I wouldn’t leave them here either. Grady and Jason will blame her if they find pills.”

  Shit. “Good point. I’ll be careful.”

  “Cool.” Ashley stuffed her purse back into a cubby and started toward the door.

  “Hey, Ashley?” Bella stopped her.

  “Yeah?” She turned around.

  Bella took a breath. “What do you think of Nadine?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, she did some bad things. But you must not hate her if you care enough to not want her to go back to prison.”

  “Lord, no. I don’t hate Nadine. She’s a decent person, if you ask me. Not too friendly, but I don’t blame her, the way people are always coming in here trying to start shit with her.”

  Bella wondered how much Ashley understood about Nadine’s crimes. “You don’t hold it against her that she—”

  “That she was gonna fuck over poor people in exchange for campaign money?”

  Okay, maybe she did understand. “Yeah.”

  “Tino did time.” She looked down at her zebra-print flats. “He, um, stole a car. It was just for fun, and he was gonna give it back, but I guess it was considered grand theft auto.” She made air quotes with her fingers.

  “I didn’t know that.”

  “Yeah, it was a long time ago, but people still hold it against him. Like, he’s been trying to get a better job, but no one wants to hire him, so he’s stuck bagging groceries.” Ashley looked up to meet Bella’s eyes. “He’s a good guy, you know? He did something stupid, but he shouldn’t have to pay for it his whole life.”

  Bella nodded. “Yeah. I agree. He’s lucky to have you.”

  Ashley smiled. “Thanks. I love that goofball.” She checked her phone. “Well, I gotta get on register before Jason has a fit.”

  Bella slipped the small box into her pocket and walked down the hall to the single-stall restroom. She locked the door and opened the box. Five blue ovals sat on a square bed of gauze.

  She wished for the thousandth time that she had decent health insurance. It was ridiculous to buy medication this way, and as Ashley had reminded her, it was against the law.

  Bella placed a pill on her tongue, then turned on the faucet. Cupping her hands, she placed them under the water until she’d collected enough. Then she slurped the water and swallowed the pill along with it. Done.

  Her reflection stared back in the scratched-up bathroom mirror. Would she feel any different, any better? And would that mean she had ADHD?

  She looked at the other four pills in the box. Ashley was right. She couldn’t leave them at the apartment or the store without putting Nadine at risk.

  The chances of getting caught were small, but she wasn’t going to fuck around with something as important as Nadine’s probation. Bella would never forgive herself if Nadine got sent back to prison because of something she did.

  There’s no other choice. She poured the pills into the toilet bowl and flushed.

  * * *

  Bella was sorting through candles and applying discount stickers when she realized something was different. She felt calm, almost subdued. Instead of fidgeting, checking her phone, and losing track of what she was doing every three seconds, she’d been focused on her task.

  Usually when she worked on markdowns, she had to check the price multiple times because by the time she reached for the stickers, she’d forgotten which discount to apply.

  Since taking the pill, she was able to check the tag, hold the number in her brain, apply the appropriate sticker, and move on to the next candle. It was effortless.

  Was this how normal people felt? Present in the moment, their thoughts deliberate instead of flitting around like a moth in a jar? No wonder other kids had been able to pay attention in class while she doodled and twitched and obsessively checked the time.

  She finished the candles, then moved to the next aisle, where Kenny was pacing in front of the angel figurines.

  Poor guy. She nodded at the shelf. “Any trouble?”

  “Not yet.” He looked disappointed. “No one has even looked at them all morning.”

  Maybe because you’re freaking people out. “Well, since you have to be here anyway, would you mind marking the statues that are going on clearance?” She held out the sheet of stickers.

  “Okay.”

  Bella wanted to try something else. She walked to the front of the store. Ashley was ringing up a customer while another person waited impatiently.

  Bella moved to a vacant register. “Sir, I can help you over here.”

  He rushed over, as she’d known he would. Men hated waiting in line to an almost comical degree.

  For the next hour, she tried to determine if working the register was any different on Adderall. She felt more mellow, without her usual restless anxiety. Counting change seemed to be easier; she didn’t lose track and start over as much. Or was she paying more attention because of some placebo effect? It was hard to say.

  A young woman with curly red hair stepped up to the counter with a vanilla-scented candle, one of the items Bella had just marked 30 percent off. But when she scanned the tag, it came up full price.

  “Oops, sorry about that. There should be a discount.” Bella considered the math problem: 6.99 times 0.7. Seven times nine was sixty-three…

  “It should be four eighty-nine.” The customer held up her phone, which displayed the answer on a calculator app.

  “Oh, right. Thanks.” Okay, Adderall didn’t make her an instant math genius. But it was a hard problem to do in your head. Even the customer had resorted to technology.

  Bella stayed on register for another thirty minutes. By the time she went on break, she was certain the effect was real. The drug had improved her concentration—a lot—and it calmed her down in a way that she had never experienced.

  She wanted to tell someone, but Nadine wasn’t scheduled to work until later in the afternoon. Anyway, she probably wouldn’t approve of Bella popping a pill she had purchased from Ashley. So she texted Raelyn: Are you busy tonight? Want to come over?

  Remembering her friend’s animosity toward Nadine, she added: It would just be us.

  Three thumbs-up emojis appeared in response.

  * * *

  Bella threw a frozen pizza into the oven. While it cooked, she loaded the blender with limeade, tequila, triple sec, and ice. Just as she was about to switch it on, there was a knock at the door.

  “It’s open!” She pressed liquify, and the machine whirred to life, turning the ingredients into a frothy green cyclone.

  Raelyn walked into the kitchen, clapping her hands when she saw the margarita mix in the blender. “Oh my God. Bless you.”

  “I still don’t have margarita glasses.” Bella opened the cabinet. “Your options are a wine glass, a coffee mug, or a plastic cup.”

  “Wine glass. I’m feeling fancy.”

  “You got it.” Bella poured the drinks. “I like your hair. You look like Ruby Rose.”

  “Thanks, lady.” Raelyn spun around to show off the new style, coiffed on top with a buzzed undercut. “That was the idea. Cheers.”

  They clinked their glasses and sipped.

  “I hope it’s not too strong,” Bella said. “I know you have to drive.”

  “Nah, it’s perfect. And I’ll only have one.”

  Bella led the way to the living room, then realized Nadine’s pillow and blanket were still on the couch where she left them each morning. She picked them up and set them on the edge of the table.

  “How’s that going?” Raelyn asked, scrutinizing Bella as they plopped down.

  Where to begin? There was so much to tell—the kiss, Nadine’s sexuality—but she wasn’t sure she was ready for Raelyn’s reaction. Instead she said, “Nadine thinks I have ADHD.”

  “Hmm, really?” Raelyn sipped her drink.

  “You don’t sound surprised.”

  “Bell, you’ve always had your head in the clouds. I never thought ADHD specifically, but it makes sense.” She chuckled. “Remember how messy your locker was in high school? You couldn’t even open it without half your stuff spilling out.”

  “Yeah. And my room and my car and everything.” Bella sloshed her margarita around in her glass. “I took an Adderall today.”

  “Wait, you already saw a doctor?”

  “No.” This was the embarrassing part. “I bought some pills from my coworker’s boyfriend’s friend.”

  Raelyn’s mouth fell open. “Jesus. You gotta be careful with that shit. You could be buying anything.” She gestured to Bella’s glass. “And now you’re mixing it with alcohol?”

  “Oops.” Bella’s glass was already half empty.

  “Buying prescription drugs off the street is probably a felony. I didn’t think you’d be so reckless.”

  “No way. A few pills can’t be a felony.”

  “Let’s look it up.” Raelyn pulled out her phone and tapped the screen. She held it up. “See? Unless you have a prescription, Adderall possession is a Class 5 felony in Virginia.”

  “Oh, shit. I didn’t think it was that serious.” I committed a felony. Just like Nadine. She’d never imagined the words felon or criminal applying to her, but if she had somehow been caught…

  “Where are the other pills?”

  “Gone.” Thank goodness she hadn’t saved any. “I flushed them at work.”

  “Okay. Well, what’s done is done. Just don’t do it again.” Raelyn sighed. “So what was it like?”

  “Honestly, it was amazing. I was calm and focused all day. I think if I’d been on medication in college, I might not have flunked out.”

  “Maybe you should see a doctor,” Raelyn said gently. “You know, get a professional opinion.”

  “I want to, but my health insurance sucks. I’d have to pay out of pocket.”

  “It might be worth it. I don’t want to minimize the hardship of paying for something like that, but a friend can’t diagnose you. Neither can the internet. If you really think you have ADHD, there’s only one way to be sure.”

  “Yeah. I’ve been doing a lot of reading, and it just—it’s like everything finally made sense. Why I’m like this, why things always felt so hard.” Bella picked up her drink, then thought better of it. “I know I should see a doctor, but it’s just so much money. And what’s the point of spending hundreds of dollars on treatment if all I’m doing is working at Overstock Oasis?”

  “Are you still thinking about going back to college someday?”

  Someday. Because she had no actual plan. “Yeah. I’m saving money. But now that I know I might have, like, a brain disorder, I don’t know. Maybe school just isn’t for me.”

  Raelyn tilted her head. “What do you mean? If you do have ADHD, you can get treatment. Wouldn’t that make college easier?”

  “Yeah, it might. But I’ve been an underachiever for so long, I don’t know if it’s enough. I can never get those years back. There’s so much I never really learned because I faked my way through high school. Lord, I can barely add and subtract.” Bella picked up her margarita again—screw it—and emptied the glass.

  “Hey.” Raelyn touched her arm. “You graduated high school just like everyone else. And you did it despite having untreated ADHD or some other disorder. That’s even more evidence of your intelligence.”

  “I suppose.” The oven timer chirped. “Oh, that’s the pizza.”

  An hour later, they slouched on the couch, empty plates and glasses spread out on the coffee table. Bella had downed two margaritas, and she was thoroughly buzzed. She stretched her arms above her head. “You know, I thought about what you said. About Nadine not being a good person.”

  “Oh yeah?”

  “You made a fair point. She did something really bad, and I’m not discounting that. But I feel like she’s suffered enough, you know? She served her time.”

  Raelyn scoffed. “She only served two years. Most people think it should have been ten.”

  “You say that like it was nothing. But imagine if someone told you that you had to spend two years in prison, no freedom or privacy, separated from your friends and family. It would be devastating.”

  “Yes, but—”

  “And now she’s on probation with all these conditions restricting her life. She lost everything. She’s stuck here working for Grady and Jason. And everyone hates her, so she can’t go anywhere else.”

  “Well, yeah. I’m sure that’s hard.”

  “It’s like she’s free, but she’s still in prison.” Bella burped. “Whoa, that’s deep.”

  At the sound of the front door opening, they both turned their heads.

  Nadine walked in with slumped posture and mussed hair. She froze when she saw Raelyn.

  Bella sat up straight. “Oh, hi. This is my friend Raelyn. Um, Raelyn, this is Nadine.”

  Raelyn smiled politely. “Hi, it’s nice to meet you.”

  “Hello.” Nadine’s feet remained planted in the entryway.

  “There’s pizza and margaritas in the kitchen,” Bella said. “You can join us.” She glanced at Raelyn. “Here, we’ll make room.”

  Bella and Raelyn scooted over, clearing a space.

  Nadine looked as if she would rather turn around and go back to work than sit next to Raelyn. “No, thank you. I need a few things from the store. I’ll give you time to catch up with your friend.” She spun around and walked out, the door banging shut behind her.

  “I’m sorry,” Bella said. “She’s not usually… I’m not saying she’s friendly to people she doesn’t know, but she’s not usually hostile.”

  Raelyn studied her. “If I didn’t know better…”

  “What?”

  “I’d think she was jealous.”

  Bella squirmed. “Why would you think that?”

  “Number one”—Raelyn pointed at her head—“my Ruby Rose haircut. I look like a sexy butch, so she probably guessed I’m queer. Then there’s the way she said your friend.”

  Could it be true? Nadine had been rude for sure, but was jealousy the reason?

  “Reason number three,” Raelyn said, “is the way you’re looking at me with total panic right now and also fluttering your eyelashes like you hope I’m right.”

  Busted. Raelyn knew her too well. “We kissed.”

  “Holy shit.” Raelyn sat back. “When?”

  “A few days ago. She’s gay.”

  “Whoa! I can’t believe it.” Raelyn shook her head. “Well, I can believe she’s gay, but that detail was never in the news.”

  “She’s a private person.”

  “Are you two…together?” Raelyn’s wary tone made no secret of how she would feel about that.

  “No.” Bella looked down at her pink fingernails. “After I kissed her, I was afraid I really messed up. I thought she felt violated. But when I tried to apologize the next day, she told me she enjoyed it—and told me she’s gay. But then she said it shouldn’t happen again.”

  Raelyn blew out a breath. “Okay. Did she say why not?”

  “No. I mean, I’m guessing it’s because she’s not interested. What other explanation could there be?”

  “Impossible. Anyone would be interested in you.”

  “Oh, right, because I have so much to offer. I’m thirty, no education, working at Overstock Oasis, and living ten minutes from my mom’s house. Nadine is… Well, her life is a mess right now, but she was a lawyer. She’s brilliant. She’d never get serious about someone like me.”