1 Master Fang The Hostess confers on Fang a title of respect not warranted by the rank of constable (Ard2). She similarly confers the title Master on Snare (6, 9), a royal or ecclesiastical title (your grace) upon the Lord Chief Justice (68–9) and a captaincy on Pistol (2.4.138). Fang and Snare are descriptive names for officers of the law, who in this case are to arrest Falstaff: fang = seize, apprehend (OED v. 1); snare = capture, catch by entangling (OED v. 1).

  entered the action recorded the lawsuit; brought the case before the court in written form (OED enter v. 22a)

  3 yeoman traditional second to a constable; attendant or assistant to an officer (OED sb. 1b)

  lusty (1) strong, vigorous and valiant; (2) full of lust or sexual desire (OED adj. 5a, 4)

  4 stand to’t fight stoutly, apply himself manfully (OED stand v. 76c); but a bawdy play on ‘get an erection’ extends the sexual connotation of lusty above.

  5 Fang apparently turns around to address Snare and discovers that he is not there. That Sirrah may be addressed to a third officer is unlikely, since no lines are given to an officer other than Fang and Snare; nor is Capell’s silent ‘Boy’ necessary (0.1 t.n.). For Sirrah as a form of address, see 1.2.1n.

  6.1 Anticipated by the Hostess to be a lusty yeoman (3), Snare would have cut a comic figure at his delayed entrance if the role was played by John Sincklo, the cadaverously thin actor who may have doubled as the Beadle – ridiculed as a starved bloodhound by Doll and the Hostess (5.4.26) – and also as Feeble (Cam1).

  2.1] Actus Secundus. Scoena Prima. F; not in Q 0.1] Q (Enter Hostesse of the Tauerne, and an Officer or two.); Enter Hostesse, with two Officers, Fang, and Snare. F; Enter the Hostess; Phang, and his Boy, with her; and Snare following. Capell 1 Fang] F; Phang Q (throughout) 3 Is’t] Q; Is it F 4 ’a] Q; he F to’t] Q (too’t); to it F 5 Sirrah – Where’s] Ard2 (Shaaber); Sirra, where’s QF; [to the Boy. Sirrah, where’s Capell 6 O Lord, ay] Q (O Lord I); I, I F 6.1] this edn (Cam1)

  11 chance perhaps, perchance: a noun used adverbially (OED sb. c)

  13 stabbed The implication is that this was with either his sword or his penis, though the Hostess probably means to speak metaphorically of the financial hurt Falstaff has inflicted on her. Cf. a similar pun in JC 1.2.272–4: ‘if Caesar had stabbed their mothers, they would have done no less’. Here begins a series of sexual double entendres in which the Hostess may unwittingly reveal the nature of her relationship with Falstaff.

  14 beastly uncivilly; possibly a bawdy allusion to a beast’s position during coitus – that is, mounting from the rear

  16 out, he Q’s punctuation, which puts weapon and foin in the same sentence, makes a more pointed joke than F’s.

  foin a fencing term meaning lunge or thrust with a pointed weapon – hence, pierce or prick – here with phallic overtones: cf. 2.4.233. In Falstaff’s willingness to spare no one when his weapon is out, the Hostess grants him a kind of indiscriminate sexual appetite. Partridge cites the proverb ‘A standing prick has no conscience.’

  18 close grapple, engage in hand-to-hand combat (OED v. 13), with a possible connotation of sexual embrace

  thrust Referring to either swordplay or sexual penetration, thrust continues the bawdy double entendre, though inadvertently on Fang’s part.

  19 No … neither If by this the Hostess means that she will be ready to receive Falstaff’s thrust, she has, perhaps unconsciously, grasped the sexual innuendo of the conversation.

  20 An … fist If I just grab or punch (OED fist v.1 2). A possible play on fist as masturbate would lend bawdy meaning to an ’a come but, and F’s substitution of vice (firm grip) for Q’s innocuous ‘view’, which may be a compositorial misreading of vice as ‘vue’ (Cam1), continues the joke. OED records the first instance of ‘come’ as slang for achieving orgasm in 1650, but the term was popular well before that: Partridge and Williams (Dictionary) list other instances of it in Shakespeare. Fang thus seems to share the Hostess’s proclivity for inadvertent double entendres. Fang’s repetition of two conditional clauses beginning with An suggests a mounting frustration which would typically climax in a statement of resolve such as ‘I’ll show him!’

  9 Yea] Q; I F 11 for] Q; not in F 14 most … faith] Q; and that most beastly F ’A] Q; he F 15 does] Q; doth F 16 out, he] Q; out. Hee F 20 An … an ’a] Q (And … and a); If… if he F 21 vice – ] F (Vice.), Capell; view. Q

  22 undone … going financially ruined by Falstaff’s going off to war; primarily because he owes her so much money, but possibly referring as well to a reputation ruined because he has promised to marry her. See 85–93.

  I warrant you colloquial pledge of assurance of a fact (OED warrant v. 5)

  23 he’s … score In the first of the Hostess’s malapropisms, infinitive is a mistake for infinite. She means that Falstaff has countless debits recorded by means of chalk markings on a board or door (OED score sb. 9a); but there may be a hint of sexual indebtedness as well, her score being the number of times he has ‘had’ her with his thing (penis), and infinitive referring to the length of that thing. Cf. 31n. on long one.

  24 sure secure

  25 *continuantly Editors since Delius have preferred F’s word over Q’s ‘continually’ as a likely malapropism for ‘incontinently’ – meaning both unchastely (OED adv.1) and immediately (adv.2) – typical of the Hostess. Davison speculates that a Q compositor mistakenly corrected what he took to be an error in the Hostess’s speech, for it is easier to imagine a compositor substituting a common word (‘continually’) for an uncommon word (continuantly) in Q copy than inventing such a word in F.

  Pie Corner The corner of Giltspur Street and Cock Lane in Smithfield (see 1.2.51 – 5), and so named for the cooks’ shops there. Adjacent to a centre of horse-trading with many saddlers’ shops, Pie Corner was a familiar resort of prostitutes. Known for its brothels since 1393, it was still mentioned in court records two centuries later: in 1586 a parson committed ‘carnal copulation … twice in one Theals house a cook by Pye Corner’, and in 1608 a woman was seen ‘occupied in a stable at Pye Corner’ (Gowing, ‘Gender’, 16). Unsurprisingly, the phrase had become slang for the female pudendum (Williams, Revolution, 259).

  25–6 saving your manhoods no offence meant to your manhoods; an apologetic formula (usually ‘saving your reverence’) excusing the mention of an indelicate subject, which in this case would be that Falstaff was ‘buying a saddle’, a euphemism for whoring

  26 indited comic catachresis for ‘invited’ – cf. RJ 2.4.127, ‘She will endite him to some supper’ – but also a verbal slip evoking the Hostess’s indictment of Falstaff for crimes committed, the domain of hospitality contaminated by her desire for legal retribution.

  22 by] Q; with F 22–3 going … he’s] Q subst.; going: I warrant he is F; going; I warrant you, he is Theobald 25 ’A] Q; he F continuantly] F; continually Q 26 indited] QF1–2; invited F3–4

  27 Lubber’s … Lumbert Street comic play on two names which the Hostess confuses. The Libbard’s or Leopard’s Head, which she calls Lubber’s (a ‘lubber’ being an idle, clumsy lout), was located on Lombard Street, named for the merchants from Lombardy who settled there in the 13th century. The Leopard’s Head may refer to the sign at Master Smooths the silkman’s shop (28), since silken garments often had the head of a lion or leopard embroidered on them (cf. LLL 5.2.544), and Falstaff is having a new wardrobe made (1.2.29–31); but it may also refer to the sign of a tavern, since Falstaff plans to dine there.

  28 Smooths Neither Q nor F offers justification for the possessive form favoured by recent editors.

  29 exion is entered The word exion may be the Hostess’s humorous attempt at a proper pronunciation, probably in three syllables, of ‘action’. In addition to the legal meaning, the phrase plays on sexual penetration.

  case legal case, but a vulgar term for the vagina as well, continuing the Hostess’s inadvertent revelation of her own promiscuity. The slang probably derived from the meaning of ‘case’ as receptacle or seed-vessel (OED sb.2 1a, 2a).

  30 brought … answer put on trial; brought to court to answer the charges

  30–1 A hundred mark about 66 pounds. For the value of Falstaff’s debt, see 1.2.192–4.

  31 long one substantial reckoning. For the tallying of an account, see 23n. The length of Falstaff’s bill (with a glance at his penis length as well: cf. ‘an infinitive thing’, 23) may allow mark to be understood as the markings made to keep track of it.

  lone The Hostess’s marital status is problematic. In this scene, she reminds Falstaff of his repeated promise to marry her (cf. 1.2.240–1) and calls herself a poor widow (68); but in 1H4, she identifies herself as ‘an honest man’s wife’ (3.3.119). Shakespeare apparently was not concerned about the potential contradiction.

  32–3 borne … fubbed off The Hostess says that she has put up with (borne) Falstaff’s debt and been put off by his excuses (OED fub v.1 3a) for an unconscionably long time, but the verbs also convey sexual innuendo: she has borne him – the full weight of his body – and he has fubbed her relentlessly. Cf. ‘O happy horse, to bear the weight of Antony!’ (AC 1.5.22).

  27 Lubber’s … Lumbert] Q; Lubbars … Lombard F 28 Master Smooths] Q; M. Smoothes F pray you] Q; pray’ye F 29 exion] QF1–2; Action F3–4 31 one] QF; Lone Theobald; loan Hanmer; score Collier2; ow’n’ White 33 and fubbed off, from] Q; from F

  36 an ass … beast The analogy between a woman and a beast of burden, bearing every knave’s wrong, recalls the Hostess’s image of bestial copulation at 14.

  37 wrong In keeping with the bawdy innuendo of the sentence, wrong may mean penis or even illegitimate child (Bate & Rasmussen).

  37.1–2 *F’s placement of the SD makes more sense than Q’s, for although Falstaff does not speak until 42, the Hostess acknowledges his entrance here, and the intervening lines may have allowed him, no doubt with comic flair, to cross the stage to her.

  38 arrant downright or notorious, usually used with knave (OED adj. 3); cf. 5.1.30, 39; 5.4.1.

  malmsey-nose Malmsey was a strong, sweet red wine; so, a reference to the redness of Bardolph’s nose, presumably caused by drink.

  39–40 Do … offices i.e. arrest Falstaff.

  40–1 Do … 2me The Hostess’s thrice-repeated do carries a bawdy quibble on ‘fuck’ much loved by Shakespeare. With me, she employs the ethical dative, an archaic construction in which a pronoun would seem to require a preposition – e.g. ‘Do … for me’. The ethical dative was often used colloquially when ‘the action implied in the verb … [was] perceived as having some effect on the person referred to’ (Hope, 100). See also Abbott, 220.

  42 whose mare’s dead? proverbial for ‘What’s all the fuss?’ (Dent, M657)

  44 Mistress Quickly the first time she is so identified in this play. In 1H4 she is only once called by this name, at 3.3.92.

  45 varlets knaves, rascals; but the word also means sergeant (OED sb. 1d), in which case it would be a particularly appropriate epithet for Fang.

  Draw, Bardolph! If Fang and Snare are trying to subdue Falstaff, he would call on Bardolph, whose hands are still free, to draw his sword.

  Cut me On use of the ethical dative, see 40–1n.

  37.1–2] Q (after 41) (Enter sir Iohn, and Bardolfe, and the boy.); Enter Falstaffe and Bardolfe. F; Enter Sir John Falstaff, Page, and Bardolph. Capell 39 knave] Q; not in F 44 I] Q; Sir Iohn, I F Mistress Quickly] Q(corr)F; mistris, quickly Q(uncorr)

  46 quean impudent woman, often a harlot or strumpet; Falstaff’s first insult to the Hostess’s virtue

  channel gutter or open sewer running along the street

  48 Wilt … 2thou The Hostess’s repeated phrase either anticipates the sentence she cannnot spit out until 50 – ‘wilt thou kill God’s officers … ?’ – or, more likely, is a sputtered response to Falstaff’s threat to throw her in the channel.

  bastardly humorous conflation of ‘bastard’ and ‘dastardly’

  49, 51 honeysuckle, honeyseed malapropisms for ‘homicidal’ and ‘homicide’. The Hostess makes two stabs at it.

  50 wilt … King’s Tudor homilies, echoing Romans, 13.3–6, often referred to rulers as ‘God’s ministers’ and therefore to government officials as ‘God’s officers’ (Shaheen, History, 160).

  52 queller killer (OED quell v. 1), with a bawdy pun in woman queller as a man who quells, or subdues, a woman’s lust

  54 *Q’s SP indicates that this line probably was spoken, though not in unison, by both officers rather than only by Fang, as in F. While elsewhere in Q Fang is named in SPs, here the more general SP ‘Offic.’ suggests that both Fang and Snare are calling for assistance in making the arrest. Alternatively, they may be expressing alarm that Bardolph is rescuing Falstaff from their grip. Such forcible ‘rescues’ of people or goods from legal custody were common in the London streets (OED rescue sb. 2). Ard2 cites Dekker, 1 Honest Whore, 4.3.141: ‘A rescue Prentises, my master’s catch-pold’ (Dramatic, 2.84); and Cowl (Ard1), Lodowick Barry, Ram Alley, 3.1, in which Captain Puff attacks the whore Taffeta – much as Pistol accosts Doll in 2.4 – and asks, ‘do you bring / A rescue, goodman knight?’ (Dodsley, 10.326).

  55 bring … two get someone to help. The Hostess has understood the Officers to be calling for reinforcements to rescue them from their own incompetence.

  55–6 Thou wot … wot ta? The Hostess lapses into dialect when entering the fray, here probably addressing Falstaff (see 57n.), whom Fang and Snare are having a hard time holding, or possibly Bardolph, whom she tries to prevent from rescuing Falstaff. In either case, the physical struggle involving the Hostess is comic. Her lines, in a modern idiom, mean ‘You will, will you? Go ahead and try it, you rogue!’ – suggesting perhaps that Falstaff will not have an easy time escaping her clutches or that she, though a woman, will be a worthy match for any assailant. Alternatively, she may be addressing the Page, who verbally assaults her at 58–9.

  46 SD] this edn; A brawl. Oxf  48 in the channel] Q; there F 49, 51 Ah] a Q; O F 54 SP] Q; Fang. F 55 or two] Q; not in F 55–6 Thou … ta?] Q; Thou wilt not? thou wilt not? F

  57 hempseed an epithet that draws on both honeyseed (the Hostess’s blunder for ‘homicide’, 51) and hemp, used to make the hangman’s rope; thus, a gallows-bird (OED sb.). The term thus logically fits Falstaff, lending support to the hypothesis that he is the addressee. Alternatively, hempseed, as grain, could be a joke about diminutive size (cf. Mustardseed in MND), in which case the Hostess would be addressing the Page.

  58 scullion the most menial of kitchen servants; thus, a person of the lowest order

  rampallian ruffian, villain, scoundrel, usually applied to a woman

  59 fustilarian Onions posits a comic coinage drawn from ‘fustilugs’, a term for a fat, frowzy woman.

  tickle your catastrophe a jocular threat meaning to beat or whip someone (Dent, C187.1); i.e. ‘make your backside tingle’ or, more vulgarly, ‘whip your arse’; tickle, used ironically, meant beat or chastise (OED v. 6b), and catastrophe was a euphemism for a person’s posterior (OED sb. 2b). This line hints at the farcical nature of the scuffle the Page and the Hostess are engaged in while Fang and Snare try to subdue Falstaff and Bardolph.

  61 be good to protect: an appeal made to someone in authority (Ard1)

  62 stand to support, stand up for; also, given the Hostess’s proclivity for unintended wordplay, a plea for him to get an erection. Cf. her asking whether the lusty Snare will ‘stand to’t’ (4).

  63 What why. Cf. 1.2.115.

  64 place social rank, status as a knight

  66 Stand from let go of: presumably addressed to Fang, who has been trying to apprehend Falstaff

  58 SP] F1–2; Boy. Q; Fal. F3–4 SD] this edn scullion] Q (scullian), F 59 fustilarian] Q; Fustillirian F tickle] Q; tucke F 59.1] Q; Enter Ch. Iustice. F 60 What is] Q; What’s F 63 What] QF; what, Pope; what! Keightley 66 thou upon] Q; vpon F; thou on Pope; on Collier

  67–8 an’t … grace The Hostess misapplies a deferential phrase, your grace usually reserved for royalty, dukes and archbishops. Cf. 1n. on Master Fang.

  68 Eastcheap the street running eastward from Cheapside, with fleshly associations appropriate to Falstaff. According to Stow’s Survey (1598), ‘This Eastcheape is now a flesh Market of Butchers there dwelling … it had sometime also Cookes mixed amongst the Butchers, and such other as solde victuals readie dressed of all sorts’ (216). It was here, too, that in 1410 the King’s sons Thomas and John reportedly raised a ruckus in a tavern late one night which had to be quelled by the mayor and sheriffs (217). In Famous Victories, however, this ‘bloody fray’ (2.88) is blamed on Prince Henry and becomes the occasion of his first arrest.

  71 more … some Deaf to her own puns, the Hostess quite innocently misinterprets the word sum (70).

  73 substance the food and drink she sells, but more generally, everything she owns (OED sb. 16)

  74 out back, returned; i.e. in the form of payment

  75 I will … mare The Hostess here addresses Falstaff directly. Her simile is jumbled. By mare she probably means the nightmare or incubus which she will resemble in her pursuit of him (OED sb.2 1); but also, through a pun she is ignorant of, she may identify herself as a horse (mare). Alternatively, by riding Falstaff like the mare, she implies that he is a horse she will sit astride until she has satisfaction. The only certain thing is that the Hostess inadvertently opens herself to a bawdy interpretation in ride thee a’ nights.

  76 I am … mare Falstaff plays on the sexual meaning of ride the mare, saying that he is as likely (like) to do the riding as she; and if she is the mare, he also may play on its meaning ‘hag’ (OED sb.2 2). Enriching the comic riposte, riding the wild mare (OED sb.1 2b) was a game akin to leap-frog to which Falstaff alludes at 2.4.249. He adds to these meanings a possible allusion to hanging: the two- or three-legged mare was a slang term for the gallows (OED sb.1 2a). Falstaff was concerned about hanging for thievery in 1H4 (1.2.56–9) and appears to be so still.