“I want more with you.” Melanie dropped Esther’s left hand and raised her fingers to push Esther’s hair behind her ear. “I want to kiss you. I’ve dreamed of it every night for weeks, and I know you said not right now. I know you did, but I can’t stop thinking about you.”

  Esther sucked in a ragged breath and shook her head slightly. “But what about Anthony and school?”

  “I talked to Chris, and he’s a good student. He’ll be fine, and I won’t treat him differently.” Melanie’s voice lowered. “I promise you that I’ll take care of him.”

  “Just like you take care of me?”

  Melanie’s eyes crinkled. “Did you know I thought that’s all this was in the beginning? That I saw a wounded soul in front of me, and I had to work my magic to fix you, to make sure you knew you had a safe place to be yourself.”

  Esther hadn’t known that, but it warmed her. The only person who had ever done that for her was Carissa and to have it with someone at school would be worth every moment of stress she had gone through before.

  “I questioned my feelings for you because of that. I didn’t want this to be me just trying to fix you and take care of you. I thought that’s all it was until Avery pointed out there was more to it than that.”

  “I don’t know what to say,” Esther whispered, but she couldn’t stop looking in Melanie’s eyes. Melanie skimmed her hand to Esther’s cheek, sliding her thumb across her skin to her lips. Melanie’s eyes locked on Esther’s mouth, and all the heat that had been in Esther’s cheeks raced between her legs.

  Melanie moved her hand to Esther’s neck, her collar bone, fingering her way across her body with featherlight touches. If Melanie didn’t stop soon, Esther was going to moan. Her heart already felt like it was going to burst out of her chest.

  “I still want to kiss you.” Melanie’s voice was soft, and her eyes followed the path of her fingers, thankfully, because Esther was sure desire was written all over her. “I want to know what it will feel like to be in your arms. Not anyone else, but yours, and I told Chris, because when this does happen, I want us to be ready for it and whatever fallout there may be.”

  “Melanie,” Esther murmured, and Melanie looked at her. “We can’t hurt Anthony with this.”

  “I promise you, we won’t.”

  “How can you make that promise?” Esther’s voice was so soft, as if they were telling each other secrets no one else could hear.

  “I can’t,” Melanie admitted. “But I’m going to try my best. That I do promise you. I don’t want him hurt in any way.”

  Wind rushed to Esther’s ears, making it hard for her to hear, and when she looked down, she realized her arm surrounded Melanie’s waist so their fronts touched. Esther had no idea when they’d gotten so close, but she wasn’t about to back up now. Moving her hand to Melanie’s side, she moved her fingers up her curves, tracing them with as much reverence as Melanie had touched her. It had been so long since she’d been held by someone like this, since she’d allowed herself to be touched.

  “What happens now?” Esther asked, bypassing Melanie’s breasts and diving her hand into Melanie’s hair, tugging lightly at the short strands at the nape of her neck.

  “I’d like you to kiss me, but please know I won’t be mad or upset if you don’t.”

  Esther’s lips widened into a smile, her gaze locked right on Melanie’s lips, her full slightly parted lips. Saying nothing, she moved in and pressed their mouths together with the slightest pressure, barely there. She pulled away but immediately moved back in, changing the angle of her head as she opened her mouth.

  Melanie groaned as she dipped her head and squeezed Esther’s fingers tightly. Closing her eyes, Esther moved in even closer and relaxed entirely as she leaned into Melanie. Excitement soared through her, and the tension that had been growing for weeks finally snapped, at least a little, as they stayed locked together in the embrace.

  When she finally broke away and breathed, her gaze flitting up to Melanie’s eyes, Esther couldn’t stop smiling. This was wonderful in a way she had never anticipated. Something about being with Melanie was completely different from being with anyone else, and she couldn’t put her finger on why or what it was.

  Melanie put their foreheads together and closed her eyes. “Please do that again.”

  Giggling, Esther dragged Melanie down for another kiss, this one slightly deeper and longer, but Esther still kept a slow pace, a distance. They hadn’t finished talking this through, but God it felt so good to just be held, to be liked, to be on even footing where there was no manipulation going on. Melanie had told her everything outright, not hiding anything, and it had been ages since someone had done that.

  Melanie found the hem of her shirt, lifting up until her fingertips touched Esther’s skin. Grinning, Esther nipped Melanie’s lip and slowed the kiss. “We can do that some other time.”

  “Of course,” Melanie answered and immediately moved her hand to Esther’s hip. “But it’s so tempting.”

  “Slow,” Esther answered with a light chuckle. “We still have a lot to talk about.”

  “Mm-hmm,” Melanie murmured as she captured Esther’s lips again in a sweet kiss. “I don’t think I’ve seen you smile this much in one day.”

  “Well, like you, I’ve been thinking about doing this for a while. My guess is longer than you.”

  “Since when?”

  Esther groaned and distracted Melanie with another kiss so she didn’t have to answer, finally pulling away regretfully. She put her head on Melanie’s shoulder and sighed. “You should go before we can’t stop.”

  Melanie combed her fingers through Esther’s hair. “I’m not opposed to that.”

  “I am. I need some time to think and make sure this is really what I want.” Esther pulled away slightly. Melanie reached up and once again brushed Esther’s hair behind her ear. “I need to know this is feasible.”

  “All right.” Melanie smiled. “But for the record, I like kissing you.”

  Esther laughed lightly with a shy smile. “The feeling is mutual.”

  By the time she dragged Melanie to the door, Esther knew she had made the right decision and even though Melanie hadn’t wanted the same things, she had listened, which was vastly different from Skip or Carlisle. When she shut the door, she clicked the locks in place and closed her eyes, but the smile was still there.

  Melanie walked back to her house on cloud nine. Kissing Esther had been everything she had dreamed of and more. She was just stepping onto her block when she stopped short at the sight of the blue minivan parked in front of her house. Her heart raced, and she quickened her pace.

  Lights were on in her house, and Melanie opened her door, finding Becky curled on her couch, a faraway look in her gaze. Melanie immediately went over, sliding onto the cushion and touching her leg to get her attention. Becky slowly looked at her.

  “Where were you?”

  “I was at Esther’s.” Becky nodded, but what Melanie had said didn’t seem to make a dent. “Where are the girls?”

  “With Preston’s parents.”

  “Where is Preston?”

  Becky’s eyes watered, her nose reddened, and her lip curled upward as a sob ripped from her chest, echoing into the living room. “Packing.”

  “What happened, Becks?”

  “I caught him cheating.”

  “Oh, baby.” Melanie moved in and wrapped her arms around Becky’s shoulders and dragged her in for a hug. She kissed the top of her head and ran her hands soothingly down Becky’s back in tight circles as she held on tightly. Becky cried into her chest, the sobs racking through her each time she tried to take a breath.

  Melanie stayed there, holding her for as long as Becky needed. Finally, she backed up and wiped her hands across her cheeks. Melanie touched her leg briefly. “I’m going to get you some tissues, okay?”

  “Okay.”

  She took off her jacket and dropped it onto the back of the living room chair before heading into the bathroom to grab the tissues. Melanie glanced at herself in the mirror, her own pain tearing through her chest as she gathered herself. She couldn’t let her own anger over her hurting child lead the way in this conversation. She had to be the one to pick up the pieces. Becky was strong enough to fight her own battle.

  Melanie reminded herself of that twice before she stepped into the hallway. Becky had sat up more and mumbled her thanks as Melanie handed the box over. She blew her nose before falling into Melanie’s side.

  Running her fingers through her daughter’s hair, Melanie bit her tongue. She had nothing to say other than how sorry she was, how hurt they both were, though she knew her hurt was nothing compared to what Becky was feeling. She wanted to jump into protection mode, but that was the last thing Becky needed.

  “We’ll figure it all out,” Melanie whispered. “Everything will work out in the end, it’s just going to be really hard for a while.”

  “I didn’t even know.”

  “Most people don’t, baby.” Melanie kissed her hair again. “How did you find out?”

  “I checked his email. I was looking for the mortgage bill, and I found emails he’s been sending to her.”

  “Do you know her?”

  Becky shook her head. “He said he met her online in a chat room.”

  Perfect. Melanie licked her lips and hugged Becky even tighter. “Do the girls know?”

  “No, and neither do Preston’s parents. I said we wanted a night to ourselves and dropped them off right before dinner. What do I say to them?”

  “I don’t know.” Tears stung Melanie’s eyes. She had wondered when Preston hadn’t come to Thanksgiving at the house, but she’d let it slide without pushing. It wasn’t her marriage, but she’d known they had been having some problems for a while now. “Is he going to talk to them?”

  “No, he agreed not to.”

  “Probably for the best until you both can figure some things out.”

  “He says he’ll be out of the house by tomorrow.”

  “Okay.” Melanie stayed still, letting Becky use her as she needed to comfort herself. They sat there for hours, until Melanie could barely keep her eyes open. Eventually she covered Becky with a blanket and told her to sleep there for as long as she could. As she stood up, she checked her watch, surprised to see it was close to two in the morning.

  “Mom?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Be glad you never got married.”

  Melanie didn’t say anything in response. She knew it was coming from a place of deep hurt, but it still stung. She hadn’t gotten married not because she didn’t want to, and living alone when she really wanted someone to share in that life with her had been hard. Bending down, Melanie kissed Becky’s temple. “Goodnight, Becks.”

  “Night.”

  The walk down to her bedroom was long and lonely. She collapsed onto her bed, turning on her side immediately, but she couldn’t sleep. She was exhausted, but every time she shut her eyes, all she could see was that pained expression on Becky’s face as soon as she’d come in the front door. She wished she could have done more for her that night, but tomorrow the real conversations would begin.

  Chapter Twenty

  Melanie had been in a tailspin the rest of the weekend. Becky had left the girls at her in-laws’, but that left Becky, broken, on her couch and barely moving, although Melanie had at least convinced her to sleep in the bedroom the last couple of nights. She’d called into work Monday, which Melanie knew was going to set Ella off.

  She scratched her head as she packed up her stuff to finish working from home Monday after school let out. She didn’t have time to mess around as soon as the staff meeting was finished. She’d already let Chris in on what was happening, and had gotten a smart remark about marriage again, which she had ignored. Some people were too bitter for her lately.

  Esther knocked on her classroom door, concern riddling her features. Melanie blew out a breath and shook her head as she motioned for Esther to shut the door. “It’s nothing to do with you, I promise.”

  “What is it?”

  “Becky. I’ll tell you about it later, but I really need to get home and make sure she’s moved today. I don’t know what to do with her.”

  Esther stepped in closer and touched Melanie’s hand. “What happened?”

  “How late are you staying?”

  “Until I have to go get Anthony. Skip canceled this week.” Esther looked confused, and Melanie knew why. She wasn’t answering any questions, and the last thing they had done was emotionally heavy.

  “Will you drive me home?”

  “You didn’t drive this morning?”

  “No. I walked. I needed the time to think and wake up.”

  Esther’s lips parted in surprise. “Are you not sleeping?”

  “Esther,” Melanie pleaded. “Drive me home, and I’ll explain it in the car. I really don’t want to talk about it here.”

  “Okay. Give me a few minutes to get my things.”

  “Thank you.” Melanie watched her go and finished packing her bag. She must have been slow because by the time she was finishing, Esther was already back–that or Esther was insanely efficient. They walked out of the school in silence, but Melanie caught Chris watching them from the doorway to the offices. She couldn’t even bring herself to raise a hand. She’d text later.

  As she slipped into the front seat of Esther’s small SUV, she sighed and rested her head against the back of her seat while closing her eyes. When the driver’s side door shut, she turned her head and started crying. Tears she had held in for days slipped down her cheeks as the pain of what was happening finally hit her.

  “Melanie, what’s going on?”

  “Becky’s getting a divorce. She told Preston to be out of the house, and he packed up and moved, but she hasn’t been back yet.”

  “Where are the girls?” Esther reached out and touched Melanie’s hand, but Melanie shook her head.

  “Please get me away from the school. I don’t want anyone to see me.”

  “Yeah. Okay.” Esther put the car into drive and pulled away from the curb. She drove slowly through the neighborhood, and it took Melanie a few minutes to realize she was driving aimlessly through the back roads, giving her enough time to collect herself. She couldn’t have been more thankful in that moment.

  “I can’t tell her how much this hurts me, too. I mean, he’s like my son. I’ve loved him like my son, and now he’s… I don’t know. Do I have to hate him, too?”

  “No,” Esther answered. “You don’t.”

  “He cheated on her.”

  Esther hissed as she took a turn and started back in the direction of the school. “How did she find out? Did he tell her?”

  “No, she found emails.” Melanie frowned. “Do you think it would have made a difference if he told her?”

  “Depends on what his purpose was for telling her.”

  “I guess.” Melanie stared out the front windshield. “Chris gave me the name of her divorce attorney.”

  “Not a bad place to start, honestly. Custody will be an issue.”

  “Yeah.” Melanie frowned. She’d get to see the girls even less now than she had before, and she hated that. She loved them with every fiber of her being. “Why can’t life be easy sometimes?”

  “I don’t think it’s meant to be.”

  Melanie turned to face Esther at that. Maybe she was right. Life had definitely dealt Esther some heavy blows. Melanie too, though for the most part her life had been easy compared to Esther’s, compared to her own kids’ too. But Becky deserved to be happy and with someone who would love her.

  “Love isn’t easy,” Esther added. “Relationships aren’t easy. They’re work, and if both people aren’t working, it’s likely not going to end well. And both parties have to be working on it at all times. It doesn’t mean progress is being made, but everyone needs to be working on things at all times.”

  “You make it sound like a business arrangement.”

  Esther shrugged. “It is in some ways. Marriage is in a lot of ways. It’s legally binding, and the dissolution of a marriage and custody arrangements are very much like a business arrangement.”

  Swallowing hard, Melanie looked Esther over carefully. “If you can say that fighting for custody of Anthony wasn’t heart-breaking, then I’ll believe you.”

  Esther shook her head. “It was the hardest thing I have ever done. It was even harder than leaving Skip.”

  “Really?” Melanie frowned. “I would have thought the opposite.”

  “No, because custody is how Skip keeps his control over me. I can’t make one wrong move without thinking he’s going to take me back to court or fight me on when I can see Anthony. I live in constant fear that he’s going to just take him one day and I won’t know for weeks.”

  Melanie’s heart broke a little more. She didn’t think Preston would do that. She gripped Esther’s hand tightly. “That’s no way to live.”

  “No, it’s not. So my best advice to Becky is to make the divorce and custody as cordial as possible, to fight for what’s best for her kids, not what she wants, and to go through the courts.”

  “I’ll tell her that.”

  Esther pulled up outside Melanie’s house and parked the car. Melanie stared at the house for a minute before she opened the door and stepped outside.

  “Thank you, Esther. I don’t know when I’ll be able to see you again.”

  “Deal with your kid, Melanie. They’re what’s important. I’ll still be here when it settles.”

  “Will you?”

  “Yeah. I will.”

  Melanie held her gaze for another second before closing the door and walking inside. As she shut the front door, Becky came out of the bedroom, showered, dressed, and with a guarded expression on her face.

  “Preston came over today.”

  “Oh?”

  “We’re going to try and work through things. Therapy. Everything. I’m not sure I’m ready to give up on us yet. I want to see if this is salvageable.”