Urgh, the picture. The stupid photograph that I posted online in response to something my mother posted. I can see now how dumb that was. Unfortunately, it had the desired effect of making Sephy jealous, but now I don’t want anything less. She’s never deserved my wrath.

  “Sephy, that’s Hattie. I know it doesn’t look good in that picture, but she’s just my friend.” I huff angrily at myself. Why didn’t I delete it sooner? Why did I even post it in the first place? “We hung out a lot when I was in Las Vegas, but only as friends. I didn’t need someone to have fun with, I needed someone to speak to and that’s what she became. I know it looks bad in the picture… but I was hurt. I didn’t want anyone to think that I was pining after you, which is stupid because I was.”

  It feel really raw for me to lay my heart on the line like that, but I know I need to do that. I don’t want Sephy to think I’m an asshole. I need her to know that at least what we shared was real. Even if it doesn’t help either of us now, we need to positive memories to cling onto to keep us going.

  “I… wow, I don’t know what to say,” Sephy says pitifully. “It’s all a bit much. Today is all too much. The wedding, Marcus, Benji, and now you’re here which I wasn’t expecting.”

  “No, I know, I didn’t think I was going to be here either,” I confess. “I got talked into it. Maybe that was a mistake. Maybe we should have kept away from one another. I don’t know.”

  Sephy nods and sucks in a breath through her nose. She’s pulling away from me, creating a separation between us, ready to move on for good. It feels like we’ve been saying goodbye for a long time, it’s something we’ve done over and over again but it doesn’t get any easier. If anything, each time I have to let her go it gets harder. Is this what it’s going to be like for the rest of my life?

  “I suppose we better get back before someone hunts for us.” Sephy sounds unsure, as if there are still hundreds of things that she wants to say but can’t. “I don’t think it’ll be good if we’re discovered.”

  I grab hold of Sephy and pull her back to me. Just before she goes I want to have a real goodbye. This is the last time now, neither of us want to be smack bang in the middle of an affair, so it has to be the final farewell and I want it to be a good one. There are things I can’t say, but I can show her how I feel. I can let her leave this behind, remembering how good we once were.

  As I drag her towards me, the sizzling chemistry builds between us. It hasn’t ever gone anywhere, even when we’ve tried to push it to one side, but now it’s more evident than ever. It burns, it prickles, it fizzles, it draws us in with a magnetic force that’s too powerful to resist.

  “I just want to say goodbye properly,” I whisper as our lips get unbearably close to one another. I can feel her breath racing over my cheeks and it’s a sensation I’ve missed terribly. “That’s all.”

  Sephy replies with one small sharp nod, effectively agreeing to what I want. Our heads continue to near one another. It’s probably a very quick movement since there are so many people around us, but as I stare into Sephy’s eyes it feels long and drawn out, like we have our own time frame.

  Then our lips crash together, and for one gorgeous moment everything is right with the world. This is where I’m supposed to be, with this wonderful beautiful woman. I want to keep her, I need to have her, but this is the very last second in which she’ll be mine. Soon she’ll belong to my older brother.

  The electricity flows between us, it locks in and keeps us in place longer than I think either of us thought it would be. I even snake my arms around her waist for a moment to keep her next to me. The second I let her go is the second that all of this transforms into something horrible.

  “Oh my God.” All of a sudden a loud, booming voice shocks both me and Sephy. We separate as if we’ve been electrocuted and stare to the side in sheer shock. I don’t know how to speak, what to say, what to even do. I didn’t want this to happen, I didn’t want anyone to get hurt, but that’s what we’ve done all the same. My moment of saying goodbye to Sephy has been wrecked in the worst way possible.

  Marcus… he’s here. He’s seen…

  Shit!

  29

  Persephone

  “M… Marcus?” I gush in shock, my heart pounding in my mouth. “I… I’m sorry, I…”

  “Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry, Marcus,” Alex jumps in. “This isn’t what it looks like…”

  “It is.” Marcus tugs his fingers through his hair in utter distress. His whole face has gone a funny shade of pale, which actually I get. This must be a massive shock for him. “You two are… kissing.”

  I glance between Alex and Marcus trying desperately to find some sort of solution. There must be an answer, some excuse that we can say to get out of this. How can we make it seem innocent?

  “Is there something going on between you two? Are you together?” His voice is too loud, I’m sure everyone can hear us and it’s clearly drama so I’m sure others must be listening in. I probably would be if I was on the other side of this. “How long has this been going on? Oh my God, this is…”

  I push past Alex and race to Marcus’s side. I need to comfort him, I need to make this okay no matter what the cost. If he needs to yell at me then so be it, but we can’t do it here.

  “Do you want to go outside for a moment?” I ask him quietly. “So we can talk about this?”

  He nods slowly and points towards the back door. “Yeah. I think we should go out there so no one catches us. We need to talk about this without our parents in the way, don’t you think?”

  I hold onto Marcus’s back and walk towards the door. When Alex doesn’t instantly follow us I shoot him a look which suggests he needs to come too. This involves him just as much as us. He needs to have an input into this conversation, I cannot have it alone. I don’t even know what I’m going to say yet, I have no plans. This is as unexpected as they come. One minute I’m sharing a goodbye kiss with the man I really love and the next I’m in a mess with Marcus. Shit, this is my fault.

  Once the cool air hits us all we stand in an odd looking circle, all staring at one another. No one seems prepared to make the first step towards starting a conversation so I suppose it’ll have to be me.

  “I think… we need to talk about what we were going to do… next…” I say slowly.

  My voice is enough to spark Marcus to life. “Were you two kissing?” he demands. “I need to know.”

  I sigh deeply, knowing that he’s right. He already knows that we aren’t marrying for love so does it really matter if he knows the truth? He was with Liza, so maybe it’s better if we go into this with our eyes wide open. I know about his history, so I guess it’s fair that he knows all about mine.

  “Yes. You did see me and Alex kissing, and that’s because we were together for a short while.” I stare at Alex who’s looking at me with all the love that he used to… making this so much harder. “We didn’t tell anyone because you and Liza hadn’t been married long and we didn’t want to make it complicated.” I breathe deeply, trying to keep my voice calm. “But yes, we did have a thing.”

  “Is this the girl?” Marcus asks Alex. “Is this the one that you were in love with? The one who changed you?” Alex nods. “Oh my God, why didn’t you tell me who it was?”

  “I didn’t know how you would react,” Alex replies pleadingly. I can see him begging his brother for forgiveness, even if he won’t say it aloud. “We didn’t know how Liza would react either.”

  “We also didn’t know how serious our feelings were going to become,” I leap in. “We thought it would just be a fling, so there wasn’t any point in creating drama, we didn’t know it’d be love.”

  Marcus turns his back to his and cranes his neck up towards the sky. Me and Alex both remain deathly silent while we wait for him to digest this, we know it’ll take a while. To Marcus it’s probably very strange, I doubt he ever would’ve placed the two of us together.

  “Are you still in love now?” he calls over his shoulder. “Is that what the kiss was?”

  I chew on the inside of my mouth while I plan my answer. I’ve been honest now, I don’t want to lie about this. “I do still have feelings for Alex, but that was us saying goodbye. You don’t have to worry.”

  Did I say that right? In my head it sounded good but now that the words are out there, I don’t know. I’m not sure I managed to portray it in the least hurtful, most honest way. Marcus still hasn’t turned back to look at either me or Alex which is problematic. I hold my breath and try to be patient.

  “You know, I came to find you Sephy, to tell you that we need to get out of this dumb ass wedding,” he finally says, shocking me to the core. “It isn’t right and we both know it. You went along with it to help me and my son, and also because my dad is a manipulative bastard, and I went along with it because I wasn’t thinking straight at all. I’ve been so sad, missing Liza. If there had been any part of me with my head screwed on, I never would’ve agreed to anything.”

  Finally he turns back to face the pair of us, and he looks to me and Alex as if a weight has been lifted from his shoulders. There’s almost a smile on his lips as he speaks.

  “Sephy, I will always be grateful to you for agreeing to marry me because I know why you’ve been doing it. You agreed for Benji’s sake, so I could get to see him and learn how to care for him properly. You did it so my dad wouldn’t take him away from you, which we all know he would’ve done. I am so happy that you would do something like that for me, and I know Liza would too.”

  “She asked me to,” I admit tearfully. “She told me to help with Benji, almost as if she knew.”

  “Yeah.” He huffs and stuffs his hands into his pockets. “I think Liza must have known too. She must’ve sensed at least that she wasn’t going to survive, so it makes sense that she would want you to be there for Benji. She always used to tell me how strong you were, and I’m sure she knew that I’m weak. Of course she would want you to be there for her child. You’re the person she respects most.”

  My chest swells with pride, that feels really nice to hear. I always knew that me and Liza got on well, and that we were the best of friends, but to hear she thought so highly of me is awesome.

  “And you gave up so much for Benji, when you’d lost your sister too,” Marcus continues. “You left your job behind, you gave up your freedom and your time, money too to take care of my son. And now I learn that you also had to give up the love of your life… well that’s too much. I won’t do it.”

  “What… what are you saying?” Alex asks his brother desperately. “What do you mean?”

  “I don’t want to get married to you, Sephy, and I know you don’t want to get married to me either. Neither of us want this at all. So, I say we put a stop to this now and find another way.”

  Ah that sounds so simple, such an easy solution. Me and Marcus just don’t get married because neither of us really want to… problem solved. The only issue is our family. Or his family. His father is not going to like this at all, he’s going to freak as he loses control of all of us.

  “So… what do we do?” I ask the brothers nervously. “How do we make this okay?”

  Neither of them answer, because none of us really know what to say. We all look at each other dumbly waiting for a magical answer to simply fall into our lap. Of course it doesn’t.

  “Do we just go in there and tell them?” I ask with a shrug. “Will that work? Is it at least worth a try? If we all go together and tell them that we’ll make a viable plan, that’ll be okay?”

  Alex doesn’t answer me, instead he races to his brother and he throws his arms around him. I guess there’s still a lot if unfinished business between them that needs to be dealt with before we tackle anyone else. They embrace tightly for what seems like the first time in a very long time.

  “I am sorry about this, Marcus. All of this. I never meant for this to happen.”

  “You didn’t do anything. You just fell in love, that’s all. No one can blame you for that. I’m still in love with Liza, nothing is ever going to change that. I’m always going to love her. You can’t help who you fall for, I know that. Me and Sephy haven’t had feelings for each other, this wasn’t ever that.”

  I get a warmth in my heart, now this seems a lot simpler. I think in our grief and sadness we got lost in our own heads and we forgot that we could work together if we really wanted to. At least we’ve gotten to that place now while there’s still a chance for us to rescue this somehow.

  “And Sephy.” Marcus invites me in for a hug too. “You are an awesome girl, the absolute best for my brother. I honestly don’t know how me and Liza would’ve reacted either, but I’m glad now.”

  I rest my head against Alex’s chest as we embrace, wondering if this is the first step towards us actually making progress towards us potentially being together. I don’t know and I certainly don’t want to get ahead of myself, but there’s a glimmer of hope that definitely wasn’t there before.

  “You three!” My mom’s voice barks at us as we’ve been caught inside. “We’re all waiting here.”

  I can see the stress in her eyes. Her temper isn’t at us at all, it’s because we’ve left her with Marcus and Alex’s parents which isn’t a place that anyone wants to be. She needs us back to save her.

  “Sorry, Mom!” I call loudly. “We’re coming now. We just needed a moment…”

  Okay, so we have to go now, without actually planning what we’re going to say which sucks, but I suppose we have to play it by ear and hope for the best. I glance at Alex and Marcus, hopefully giving them a look which they understand, and together the three of us walk back inside. At least we’re in this together now, we aren’t all three people alone. Together, we can do this… I hope.

  I soon spot the boys’ parents and they don’t look happy. There’s a glowering, especially on his face, which isn’t a good sign. He’s not going to like what comes next.

  “Are you coming?” he calls out angrily. “We’re running late now. What were you even doing?”

  “No, we aren’t ready yet,” I shoot back, feeling a sense of empowerment. “We need to talk before we go in there. I think me, Marcus, and Alex have a lot to say.”

  He stares angrily at me, hating me for the moment, but for the first time I don’t care. With Marcus behind me, I won’t lose Benji. None of us will. It’s messy, but it always has been. Now we can make it work.

  30

  Alex

  I step forwards and grab onto Sephy’s hand to support her as she stands against my father. Admittedly I feel anxious, I don’t want him to explode like a crazy person in here, but I need to be her rock. She’s being damn brave, more than me and Marcus and I cannot leave her alone.

  Dad’s eyes glance down and he sees us holding hands. His face darkens, even more than it already was. His bad moves can shake the atmosphere in any room and the same goes for here. It’s like there’s a black cloud hanging above us all and it’s about ready to burst out endless rain.

  “Maybe we should go and talk somewhere else?” I ask anxiously. “This probably isn’t the place.”

  “But the wedding…” Mom says, pointing towards the room. She hasn’t got it yet.

  “Mom, there isn’t going to be a wedding,” Marcus jumps in. “We’ve talked about it and it isn’t going to happen. None of us want this, it isn’t right for anyone. So we might as well leave.”

  Eventually we all shuffle out, and I have to admit that the walk out from the building is just as ominous as the walk in… maybe even more so. I’m so glad that Marcus is okay and that he doesn’t want to get married either, but I don’t know how logically this is going to work. I don’t think it’ll be what we want in the long run because my dad is a strong willed man who never loses.

  We move from the court house and over to the car park. “Maybe we should go to the nearest café,” I say, wanting to keep this as civilized as possible. “Have a talk and a drink at the same time?”

  I don’t think anyone wants to agree with me, but Marcus leaps in and takes control. “Yes, that’s a good idea, Alex. I think we all need to keep this as calm as possible. We have a lot to discuss here and I don’t want anyone to freak out. There’s a café over there which looks perfect to me.”

  He walks ahead of us, heading towards the café before anyone can argue with him. That’s perfect, no one can argue with him because this is his day and also because he’s fragile. Or at least he has been, today has been the first time I’ve seen any strength from him in ages. It seems that he’s come through a hole and out the other side, I just hope he keeps on going in the right direction.

  We walk into the café and take a seat each around the table in the corner where Marcus is already sitting, waiting impatiently. He has his hands clasped together in preparation. Dad sits next to his eldest son and he looks at him needily. I sit opposite them both, with Sephy right next to me.

  “So, what is it we need to talk about?” Dad snaps. “What is all of this? There’s not going to be a wedding now? Despite the fact that we’ve all put in a lot of effort to make this happen. We’ve all sacrificed and we’ve all tried to fuse together through this horrible situation.” He glances around at all of us as if he expects someone to jump to his defense. “None of us wanted you to lose Liza, that was awful and has affected everyone, but I thought this was the best solution for all of us.”

  Marcus shakes his head. “No, Dad, there isn’t going to be a wedding, because Sephy and Alex are in love.” There’s a collective gasp around the table, including mine. I wasn’t expecting Marcus to dive in with the truth so quickly. “They’ve been in love for a while. So she can’t be my wife.”

  Dad bangs his fists down on the table angrily. A waitress had almost reached our table, but when he does that she spins and walks away with quick steps. She’s afraid, but not as much as me.