But her job at the day care turned out to be much different than working at Deb’s. The larger setting made forming close connections with the children difficult. Everything was very structured, keeping her busy with setup and cleanup for activities more than actual time with the children. The work drained her physically, and she ended up going to bed at the same time Sarah did almost every night.

  Occasionally she heard news from home and received letters from Tamara. Her cousin had decided to spend another summer at the camp as a senior counselor this time. Ty had been accepted into the Air Force Academy. She didn’t know if she would have a chance to say good-bye to him before he left. Tamara and Brian were still doing well, missing each other terribly during another summer of separation, but were otherwise fine. Every time she got a letter from Tamara or her aunt, she got more homesick.

  She and Bryce had been seeing each other on a regular basis. He always lifted her spirits and was becoming a good friend. On the night of their first date she had told him she wanted to see each other as friends rather than getting into some heavy relationship. He agreed. Planning to go back to college at the end of the summer, he didn’t want to get into anything too serious either--at least for now.

  He often picked her up from work and took her to dinner, along with Sarah. Sometimes he came into the house instead of dropping her off, and they spent the evening together. Patrick and Faith liked him and didn’t seem to mind having him there. He always left by nine and hadn’t tried to do anything besides hold her hand.

  Most of their time together included Sarah, but he wanted to take her out for a nice dinner on her birthday, so she left Sarah at the house with Patrick and Faith for the evening. They went to an Italian place, and Holly enjoyed his company as usual. She wasn’t surprised by the good relationship they were developing, but she did find herself amazed that Bryce had an interest in her considering the fact that she had a child. It was one thing for Scott to desire a relationship with her, being a single parent himself, but quite another for Bryce. He could have his pick of dozens of young women his own age that didn’t come with a two-year-old. Why did he want her?

  She didn’t understand his interest but accepted it, remembering what Josie had said about putting the past behind and moving forward with whomever God brought her way. She needed this--a peer friendship to help her through these difficult months. Depression and loneliness still visited her from time to time, but her hours with Bryce helped to chase away those gloomy thoughts.

  After dinner he took her to a surprise destination. She enjoyed the anticipation of waiting to see what he had in store for her. He was always coming up with creative ways of spending an evening together, and she had no doubt this would be up there with the rest of them.

  He took her ice skating at the mall. She hadn’t been skating since she was in junior high. He hadn’t either, and they had quite a time navigating the slippery surface together. By the end of the first hour, Holly’s sides hurt from laughing so hard every time they took a tumble. Her hips and feet were hurting too.

  They decided to stop before they seriously hurt themselves and went out for dessert instead. They sat at a table in Baskin- Robbins and talked for a long time. He reminded her of Scott in many ways. They were both very kind and soft-spoken. Bryce was good with Sarah, and she had no doubt he would make a good father someday.

  Bryce dropped her off at the house much later than usual. He often came inside, especially when Sarah was with them, but tonight he chose to say good night to her on the front porch.

  “I had a great time,” Holly said. “Thanks for making my day special.”

  “My pleasure,” he said. “I can’t think of anything I’d rather do.”

  She knew he wanted to kiss her before he began to lean toward her. Pressing her hand on his chest, she took a step back. He didn’t look surprised she had backed away, but he did look disappointed.

  “I’m sorry,” she said. “I like you, Bryce. I really do. But I’m not ready for that yet.”

  “Yet?” he said, his blue eyes lighting up. “You mean, there’s hope?”

  She smiled and stepped forward to kiss him on the cheek. “I appreciate your friendship, Bryce. Good night.”

  “Good night, Holly,” he replied, kissing her forehead before turning away.

  ***

  Holly gave her two-week notice at the day care in August and returned to Hood River for three weeks before fall term began. From the moment she walked through the door of her aunt and uncle’s home, knowing her stay would be more than two days, she felt a peace wash over her. Everything felt right here.

  After getting settled in her room, she realized she had forgotten to bring Sarah’s Pull-ups for nighttime and decided to make a run into town. She asked her aunt if she needed anything and added a few items to her list.

  On her way to the store she decided to stop by Deb’s to see her former employer. It was Saturday, so she knew none of the children would be there, but she hadn’t seen her since last spring when she had come home one weekend in May. She could always come by during the week sometime to see the children, but this would give them some time to talk.

  She approached the house, scanning the street and driveway for Scott’s truck. Seeing only Deb’s car, she supposed Scott was either out somewhere with Madeline or at work. She remembered that he sometimes worked on Saturday, at least that had been his schedule last year. She could hardly believe how long it had been since she’d seen him.

  When Madeline didn’t appear to be there she decided not to stay too long, knowing Scott might be returning at any time. She could always see Madeline another day when she came by to see the children.

  Deb seemed happy to see her and offered her some tea. She sat down at the kitchen table, waiting for Deb to serve her, and a flood of happy memories washed over her: Mealtimes with the children; art projects and preschool activities she had done with the older ones; dinners spent with Deb, Scott, and Madeline.

  She couldn’t hold back. “Oh, I miss this place.”

  “I miss having you here.”

  “Does Ashley still work for you?”

  “Oh, yes. She and Austin live here now.”

  Holly found that news surprising and distressing. Ashley and her son lived right here in this house with Scott and Madeline too? She knew Ashley and Scott were close to the same age. Had they become involved after she left?

  “I offered her a room when Scott moved out. I have to admit I hated having to lose you, Holly, but God worked things out perfectly. Ashley is like a completely different person than when she first brought Austin. In fact she is a different person. She gave her life to Jesus about a month ago.”

  Holly was thrilled about the news concerning Ashley, but she had to take a sip of her hot tea to keep herself from blacking out.

  Scott moved? How long ago? Where is he?

  Holly tried to think of the last time she had seen him. She had only been back once during the summer, but she hadn’t gone to church because Sarah hadn’t felt well. In May, the last time she had seen Deb, Scott hadn’t been there. She supposed it must have been when she had been home for spring break. Yes, he had been there the first Sunday but not the second. Had he moved then?

  And where had he moved to? The most logical place seemed to be The Dalles. He hadn’t been happy with his job here in Hood River. Perhaps he had finally gotten another one back there.

  She wanted to ask Deb but didn’t know how she could do so without sounding suspicious. Of course she could use Madeline as an excuse, saying she hoped to see her while she was here, but before she had a chance, Ashley returned to the house, interrupted their conversation, and sent them on an entirely different topic.

  Deciding to wait and see if Scott showed up at church the following day, she didn’t ask Deb his whereabouts. But the following morning he wasn’t there, only confirming her theory that he had moved back to The Dalles. In a way she felt relieved she wouldn’t have to face him. She’d never had that talk with Faith like she promised. And things were progressing between her and Bryce. Perhaps this was a sign that she should allow their relationship to move forward as Bryce seemed to be more and more anxious to do.

  But on the other hand, she knew she had hoped to see Scott, even just in passing while she was here. She needed that--some sort of definite closure that he was no longer waiting for her. Not knowing where he and Madeline were exactly sent her entire world into more turmoil.

  On Friday of the following week she went to see the children at Deb’s. Madeline was noticeably absent, and Holly got up the courage to ask where Scott had moved to.

  “I’d like to see Madeline while I’m here. Did they move back to The Dalles?”

  “Oh, goodness no. They live about four blocks from here, on the other side of the park.”

  Holly felt relieved. He was close by. He was right here in Hood River. A peace resettled over her heart.

  “I’m sure they’d love to see you. I’ll give them a call and see if they’re home. Scott had today off.”

  Holly panicked. No. I can’t see him today! But Deb was already making the call. Holly felt the blood return to her face when Deb hung up.

  “No answer at the house. They might be at the park. I could call his cell--”

  “I have the number. I’ll go look for them,” she said, rising from the table to leave. She had already been there for more than an hour and needed to get to the store.

  “All right. If you don’t catch up with them, I’ll give you the address so you can stop by another time.”

  Deb jotted down the information and handed it to her. She said goodbye to the children, giving an extra long hug to John Michael, and left with Sarah, but she had no intention of going to the park or stopping by Scott’s house today or any other day.

  She did hope Scott would be at church at least one Sunday during her stay so she could see Madeline, but they weren’t there any of the four Sundays. Why isn’t Scott going to church anymore? Is he mad at God because of me?

  The thought made her feel sick.

  On the drive back to Portland on that final Sunday afternoon, Holly began to wish she had gone to see Scott. Was he all right? Had he become a recluse? What effect would that have on Madeline? She felt sad to think he didn’t even send Madeline to church with her grandma.

  Those thoughts plagued her for several weeks. She did have his address and considered writing him, but what would she say? Hey, I really think you should be in church and not keep Madeline from learning about God. Oh, by the way, I haven’t talked to Faith about those “things,” I’m not coming back anytime soon, and I’ve been seeing someone else.

  Instead she decided to pray for him.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  “Holly, can I talk to you?”

  Holly looked up from the alfredo sauce she was stirring. Faith had come into the kitchen and stood beside the counter.

  “Sure.”

  “Is everything all right?”

  Holly set the spoon aside, put the lid on the pan, and turned off the burner, realizing the sauce was plenty warm and she didn’t need to keep heating it. She could have stopped two minutes ago. “What do you mean?”

  “I get the feeling that you’re not entirely happy here. Is something bothering you? Have I said or done something to upset you?”

  “No,” she replied instantly.

  “No, I haven’t done something, or no, nothing is bothering you?”

  Holly hesitated this time. She had never lied to Faith, and she wasn’t planning to start now.

  “What is it? Can I help?”

  Holly stepped away from the stove and went to sit at the table. Faith followed, taking the seat beside her and waiting for her to speak.

  “I’m worried about someone.”

  “Someone I know?”

  She shook her head. “Someone in Hood River. A friend. I think h--they might be having a rough time.”

  “Have you prayed for them?”

  She nodded. “Every day.”

  “It might be hard to see right now, but there’s glory waiting on the other side.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Difficult circumstances often lead to bigger and better things. Like when you were pregnant with Sarah and felt like your world was coming to an end, but things are better for you now, right? Even better than before you got pregnant?”

  Holly knew that had been true when she’d been living in Hood River, and even since she had been back here it had been difficult, but nothing like her life before Sarah ever came into it.

  “Yes,” she replied. “I guess it’s hard to look at it that way now--for my friend, I mean.”

  Ricky came running into the room followed by Sarah. He had taken Sarah’s baby again.

  “Mama! Ricky took my dolly.”

  “I see that. Can you ask him nicely to give her back?”

  “Give it back!” she said lunging for the doll in his chubby hands.

  Holly reached out and stopped her. “Nicely.”

  Sarah stomped her foot and gave her the evil eye. Holly was certain she must have gotten that from her father.

  “Haf-ta say pleeese,” Ricky taunted her.

  Holly had to contain a smile. Ricky was one of those little boys that was always cute even when he was misbehaving.

  “Patrick Richard Matthews IV!” Faith’s voice scolded.

  Ricky looked crestfallen at the reprimand. “Sowwy,” he said, handing the doll back to a still scowling Sarah. “Hewe. You can hav it.”

  Sarah snatched the doll, and they both ran off to play again. Faith and Holly burst out laughing. “Oh, Holly. She is so sweet, even when she’s mad. Boys are going to be running in circles around her someday, not knowing which end is up.”

  “And Ricky is going to be a big tease and get away with it with those big blue eyes.”

  “Ah, yes. Just like his daddy--except for the blue eyes, of course.”

  Holly laughed. Patrick did have a mischievous streak, she’d noticed. Whereas Faith was as well-mannered as they came.

  “How did you two meet?”

  “In high school. We had chemistry together junior year--the class that is. We were lab partners.”

  “When did he first ask you out?”

  “The second day of school.”

  Holly laughed. “I guess he knew what he wanted.”

  “It’s called being impulsive,” Faith said dryly. “I thought he was crazy. Turned him down flat.”

  “You didn’t!”

  “Yes, I did. Multiple times.”

  “Faith! I’m shocked! I can’t imagine you saying no to anyone.”

  “Well, I had pretty high standards about whom I dated. Patrick wasn’t exactly my type.”

  “Patrick?”

  Faith smiled. “He was known as a real ladies’ man, if you know what I mean. He drove a Porsche to school every day and brought flowers and candy for whomever he was trying to impress that week. He’d date a girl for a week or two, then move on to the next. I didn’t want to be another on his list. I figured he would give up eventually.”

  “But he didn’t?”

  “Nope. He thought I was a challenge. He started doing things like getting down on one knee and proposing to me right in the middle of lab, or sending me flowers every hour, or serenading me during lunch. It was so embarrassing.”

  Holly was in stitches. She never would have suspected such things about the Patrick she had gotten to know: a caring man who showered his wife and children with love and had opened his home to her so graciously.

  “Was he rich or something?”

  “His dad was.”

  “How did he finally win your heart?”

  “By surrendering his heart to Jesus.”

  “Wow! I guess I should ask, how did you win his heart?”

  “It was all God’s doing, let me tell you. I finally thought of the perfect way to brush him off for good. I told him I’d go out with him if he started coming to church with me. He said he couldn’t because Sundays were the day he spent with his dad. So I asked him to come to Young Life--a Christian youth program that met once a week at school.”

  “And he actually came?”

  Faith put her forehead in her hand. “I figured he’d only come the one time, take me out, and that would be the end of it.” She lifted her head and smiled warmly. “But after our first date he asked if I wanted to go out again. I made the same deal. So he kept coming to youth group, and we kept going out.”

  “He must have been in love with you from the start.”

  “That’s what he tells me. And I believe it because I also told him he couldn’t kiss me until he became a Christian for real. I told him I’d know if he wasn’t serious about it, so he started asking me how to become a Christian and listening to the youth leader and reading the Bible I gave him. He even started coming to church when I found out his dad was only around about once a month. I think he thought he could fool me by doing all that stuff, but I waited.”

  “How did it happen?”

  “We went to camp the next summer with a bunch of other kids from the group. He’d heard everything he needed to know by that point, but it hadn’t become real to him. It was all in his head, not his heart. But then on the last night the speaker gave a powerful message about the love and grace of God and gave an invitation for anyone who wanted a personal relationship with Jesus to come forward. Patrick went with tears streaming down his cheeks. It was the first time I’d ever seen him cry, and I knew it was real. God had broken through.”

  “When did you get married?”

  “When we were twenty.”

  Holly had celebrated her twentieth birthday this summer. It seemed strange to think she was the same age Faith had been when she got married.

  “Did you finish college?”

  “Patrick did. I could have too, but I didn’t want to.”

  “How come?”

  “I never felt like going to school and getting a degree was for me. I had been accepted to OSU along with Patrick, and that was our plan to go there, graduate, and then get married, but I kept feeling like that wasn’t what God had in mind. I decided to go on a year-long mission trip instead.”