“What can I say, it’s a gift.”

  I shifted her on her back and settled in between her legs as we made out on the couch. I never felt closer to anyone my entire life. It hurt how much I loved this woman and yet it made me feel like I could conquer the world. I reached under her shirt to feel her breast, they were rubbing up against my chest and I needed to feel the same thing on my palm.

  I found my happy place, as the phone in my pocket vibrated.

  The vibration hit her on the inner thigh. “Aw, that’s a new one.”

  I smiled and kissed her neck as I fished my phone out of my pocket. I grazed her between the legs and she moaned, in pleasure and disappointment when my fingers didn’t stay longer.

  Jack: Jackson, can you tell mom I’m sorry and that I am hungry.

  I turned the screen so she could read the text message. She groaned and not how I wanted her to groan lying underneath me. I shifted off of her and she sat up. She turned to stand up, but I pulled her back down and hugged her close to me, kissing the back of her neck.

  “I better fix him dinner or he might call child service on me for neglect.” She turned to me. “Stay for dinner.”

  “Love to.”

  I watched her walk to the kitchen and thanked God.

  That ass finally belongs to me.

  ***

  Carrington Olivia Butler

  Jackson turned the television on as I fixed dinner. He sat slumped on the couch and I peaked glanced at him make sure this was real and he sitting in my living room and we were back together.

  I finished putting dinner on the table.

  “J, dinner’s ready.” He switched the television off and stood up. He stretched and his shirt rode up and I caught a glimpse of his perfect abs. My favorite body part along with his arms and hands and legs and incredible butt. He caught me checking him out and laughed. He winked and walked over to the stairs.

  “Jack, come down for dinner.”

  Jack showed up even before Jackson could sit down. I motioned for Jackson to sit at the head of the table and I sat on his right, Jack in his regular seat on the left. Jack watched Jackson and I interact under his hooded eyelids, too afraid to look either one of us in the eye.

  With the food piled on everyone’s plate, I paused, watching the two men in my life in one place and was beyond grateful.

  No one spoke during dinner. The silence killed Jack, but I enjoyed it. With the content look on his face, I knew Jackson, enjoyed it too. So much of our chaotic life. The screaming fans and the screams in our heads silenced for the first time in a long time. I sighed and smiled at Jackson, but jumped when Jack put his fork down. He sighed and looked back and forth between the two of us.

  “What is going on?”

  “What do you mean,” I shoved a piece of chicken in my mouth and chewed, “Nothing’s going on.”

  “You two are acting funny.”

  “Besides you riding your bike through the streets of Arizona risking your life for no good reason at all, no nothing else is going on?” Jackson asked.

  “Come on, I said I was sorry.”

  “We know.” We both said in unison and continued eating.

  “Come on. You’re killing me.”

  We cringed at his use of words, blushed and smiled. Jackson chocked on a piece of chicken and took a sip of water.

  “Are we all friends again?”

  “I don’t think I can answer that.” Jackson said.

  “Yeah, me neither.” I shook my head and concentrated on the food on my fork.

  “You know. If you hadn’t done something so dangerous today, we might be in a more talkative mood.” Jackson said. “I think it better we just eat in peace and quiet, reflecting on what we did or didn’t do today.”

  “I know what I didn’t do today,” I said. “I didn’t do something behind my mother’s back today.”

  “Yeah, me, too.” Jackson turned to Jack, “What about you Jack, can you say the same thing?”

  “You two are weird.”

  “Ok, I do have one questions,” I said. “Did you really think you were going to get away with it. I’m just curious.”

  “That’s good question. Did you think I be so happy to see you that I would ignore the fact that what you did was dangerous and irresponsible?”

  “I wanted to see you.”

  “So, was it worth it.”

  “It got you two back together,” Jack said and smiled at himself as he shoved food into his mouth. “I would say it was worth it.”

  Jackson and I looked at each other.

  He had a point there.

  After dinner, I made Jack do the dishes while Jackson and I sat at the kitchen table watching him. We stoled glances and touched each other when Jack turned away. When Jack finished the kitchen, he turned towards us and held out his hands.

  “What now?”

  “Upstairs, take a shower, brush your teeth and go to bed,” I said a little firmer then I intended. Jackson put his hand on my leg and my mind flashed back to our first kiss.

  “We’ve all had a long and exhausting day. Why don’t we all go to bed and start again in the morning.”

  We both looked at Jack and he hesitated, but turned and walked out of the kitchen and back up stairs.

  I grabbed Jackson’s hand and he rubbed his thumb in little circles on my wrist. It sent a chill through my body and I held on tighter to stay grounded.

  “I should probably go.” He held my hand up to his lips and kissed it. I didn’t want him to leave, but he yawned and his eyes appeared tired. He had no intention of staying.

  We stood up and I followed him to the door. His hand wrapped in both of mine. We walked out on the porch and the chilly air made goose bumps spring out over my arms. Jackson pulled me into his arms and wrapped them around my back, rubbing them up and down to generate some warmth.

  “You ok?” I asked, my voice muffled by his shirt.

  “Yeah.” He said and kissed the top of my head. “I’m tired and I still have some work to do since I left the facility early.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  He held me by the arms and looked down at me. “I’m not.” He smiled and leaned down and kissed me. He pulled away, but I pulled him back, not ready to let go. His lips brought stability and a sense of calmness to my soul that I didn’t realize I missed until that moment. I needed more of this feeling. I needed more of Jackson Latre Mitchell.

  Our lips parted and Jackson gave me another strong hug and we whispered goodbye.

  Watching him walk away made my chest hurt. I didn’t want to watch him drive away. I headed upstairs to check on Jack.

  I found him in his room in his pj’s, reading a book.

  “Hey, Jackie.”

  “Hi Mama.”

  “You ok?”

  “Yeah, you?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Did Jackson leave?”

  “He went home?” I didn’t like the sound of the word leave anymore. I sat at the end of his bed and rubbed his foot through the blanket. “I love you Jackie.”

  “I know.”

  “Jackson loves you too.”

  “I love him.”

  “Do you understand how crazy it makes both of us when you do something like what you did this afternoon?”

  “Yes.”

  “Jackson and I have a lot in common, but our favorite thing in common is how we feel about you.”

  Jack smiled and crawled over to me and wrapped his arms around my neck.

  “I’m so sorry.”

  “I know baby.” I pushed his hair out of his face. “You’re still grounded for a week.”

  “Ugh.”

  I held him close and as we both yawned I tucked him in and headed back to my room.

  I crashed as soon as my head hit the pillow, I felt like I hadn’t slept in a year.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Jackson Latre Mitchell

  I couldn’t sleep at all last night.

  As soon as I arrived home, I caught up on some film work and wrote some notes for my receiver. After that, I went to bed and missed Carrington. That combined with her body pressed up against me lingering in my mind, made it hard to fall asleep. I gave up after an hour of tossing and turning. I picked up the phone to call her, but put the phone back down. I needed to work this out myself.

  I told Carrington I could do both; be an NFL star quarterback and everything she and Jackson needed from me, but I had no clue how I was going to do that.

  I pulled out my iPad and took a look at my schedule for the rest of the season. We had to find a balance. I had football and she had a job. She needed her time with Jack and we needed time to spend alone, too.

  Something nagged the back at my mind and it came to the forefront when I looked at the calendar in February. The off season we had all the time in the world together, but Carrington said she didn’t want to live her life based on in season and off season. Not to mention, preseason and post season, too.

  I rolled over and looked at the time on my phone. I called my dad.

  “Jackson, what are you doing up so late?”

  “I could ask you the same questions.”

  “Well, I’m old and when you’re old, you don’t need that much sleep.”

  “Dad, you’re not old.”

  “Tell my knees, that.” I chuckled with him. He ran three miles a day no matter what and hanging around the game, kept him young.

  “Who are you talking to?” My mother asked. My mother’s voice filled my ears and calmed my anxiety.

  “You’re son.”

  “What’s wrong, Jackson?” my mom asked.

  “She has three sons. How did she know it was me?”

  My mom must have heard me because she laughed.

  “Because Stephen and Patrick already called tonight.”

  “What’s wrong, son?”

  “Nothing, I just had a questions. How did you do it?” I paused trying to figure out how to word the question, “Be a husband and father and play professional football.”

  “What do you mean, how did I do it? I did it.”

  “Yeah, but you taught me that what every I do I have to do it one hundred percent.” I cleared my throat. “So, how do you give one hundred percent to three things at the same time.”

  “Well son, you’re categorizing them wrong.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I never said I want to be the best football player, best husband and the best father. I wanted to be the best man I could be. As long as I worked one hundred percent on that goal, the rest naturally fell in line.”

  “Oh man, Dad.”

  “Son, as usually you’re over thinking it. Is this about Carrington and Jack?”

  “Yeah.”

  “You understand what you’re getting into.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Well, you’re in love with a woman who has a child. I now how you feel about Jack, but it’s a lot different being his god father and being his father.”

  “I realize that.”

  “Do you? Because, whether your there or not, you have to consider his feeling for you are going to change and he’s going to look at you in that manner because well, he doesn’t have any other father figures in his life.”

  “I know.” My tone lost all of it’s confidence.

  “Does he know about Josh?”

  “Not really. I mean. He knows his name and he knows he died, but he doesn’t know what happened.”

  “Eventually she is going to tell him the truth and their will be some things for you to deal with regarding that, are you ready for that?”

  “I have to be ready for it.” I ran my hands through my hair and leaned my head back. “I love her. I love them both. I’m not scared of being Jack’s father.”

  “I know you love them and you want to take care for them. Let me ask you something? Does your need to take care of them have anything to do with Josh?”

  A good questions, I sighed and thought about it. One I should be asking myself.

  “I don’t think so. I mean, maybe back when Carrington came back to school it had a little bit to do with that, but I remember how I felt about Carrington the first time I saw her and you know what, I feel the exact same way about her now.”

  “And, is it the same for her.”

  “I don’t know, but she does want to give us another try.” The thought warmed my heart. “She’s scared to give up control because that’s what Josh took from her.”

  “She told you that?”

  “Yeah, which is progresses because she never talked about it before.”

  “Well, it sounds like you both want the same thing. Now you have to figure out how to get there.”

  “We have to spend time together.”

  “Yes, that’s important.”

  “Ugh, so again, back to my questions, how do I have time to do it all.”

  “Son, that’s nothing, but a scheduling issue.”

  My dad laughed at his own joke and I laughed at his laugh.

  “Thanks Dad.”

  “You’re welcome son. Get’s some sleep.”

  “You too. Love you.”

  “Love you, too.”

  A scheduling issue, that’s something I could fix.

  ***

  I tossed and turned for a few more hours, but when the sun peered into my bedroom window, I got up, showered, shaved and jumped in my car as I dialed Carrington’s number.

  “Are you really calling me at six am?”

  “I’ll be their in five. I’ve got something to show you. ”

  “Email it to me,” she said.

  “I can’t go to work this morning without kissing you.”

  She giggled and I knew that got her up.

  I arrived a few minutes later, Carrington opened the door as I skipped up the steps. She wore the shortest little boy shorts and her tank top rode up enough to show a flash of her light brown skin. I scooped her up and kissed her until her body went limp. Nothing on me was limp.

  “Good morning,” she said.

  “Morning.” I carried her inside, “God you feel good.”

  She tilted her pelvis to move against me and I held her tighter and ran my hand over her ass.

  “Whoa, before you get too excited and go to far, Jack will be down in a few minutes.”

  “Great, that gives me just enough time.”

  She squinted and glared at me. “Enough time for what?”

  I sat her down and patted her on the butt with the folder.

  “What’s that?”

  “I’ll show you.” I grabbed her hand and pulled her into the kitchen.

  “You want coffee.”

  “Please.”

  She prepared the coffee as I pulled the print out of my schedule and laid it on the counter.

  She handed me the cup and jumped up on the counter. She leaned over and kiss my neck and I forgot about the schedule and pulled her face around and kissed her again.

  Did I mention I love her lips?

  “Ok. What is all this?”

  “So, I figured it out, last night. This is my schedule and I have all these pocket’s of time that we can spend together.”

  “Ok,” she said extending the word out as if she didn’t quite understand.

  “Ok, so like today is Thursday, I don’t have to be at the facility until ten am, so I can stop by at six am for breakfast.”

  I looked up at her and she shook he head.

  “On Friday, I go in early, but I am free after the walk through. And, look here, I take Tuesday afternoon off, so I could pick Jack up and do something, just the two of us and I’ll have him back for dinner or we can all go out together. Of course, I realize you have a job, too. If we need to make some adjustments based on your schedule, let me know.”

  She started giggling, which turned in to a full on cracking up laugh when I looked at her.

  “Are you making fun of me?”

  “No.” She tried to control herself, but it took her a few minutes to regain control. “I’m not really, and this is great. Really it is great, but it’s kind of hard to stick to a schedule with a eight year old.”

  “Well, look at it as more like a guideline and not so much a schedule. I want you to see that I do have time for you and Jack in my life.”

  “I know and I love you for it, but it’s not necessary. You don’t have to prove anything to us. It’s enough to know you want to be with us and when you can, you will. I’m not worried about that.”

  “When did you become so easy going?”

  “I don’t know. I guess being in love changes a persons perspective.”

  She smiled and her eyes sparkled and I didn’t notice Jack walk in until he spoke.

  “Good Morning, Jackson.”

  “Hey buddy.”

  “Hi Mama.” She leaned over and kissed Jack on the forehead. All the drama from yesterday forgiven.

  We watched Jack as he poured himself some cereal and milk and took it to the table.

  “I do like this idea,” Carrington said and pointed to Tuesday on the schedule.

  “What idea?” Jack said with a mouth full of cereal.

  “Yeah, too bad you pulled that stunt yesterday, you’ll still be on punishment next Tuesday.”

  “What’s happening on Tuesday?”

  “Nope, you’ll have to wait until the following week.”

  “Yeah, and I guess he got lucky that you have an away game this weekend. I would have to go to the game all by myself.”

  “Uh hu, no way you’re leaving me. That’s not fair.”

  “Jack,” I said and he snapped to attention. “We’re joking, but please stop saying that. No one owes you a life that’s fair. You are blessed with what you have and you need to start appreciating it.”

  Jack looked at Carrington and she lowered my eyes and took a sip of coffee. He turned back to me.

  “Yes, sir.” Jack lowered his eyes and finished his cereal.

  “Ok, baby, Ms. Ella will be ready in five minutes. Run up and get your bag.” I watched their morning ritual and admired the synchronized rhythm of it all. He came back down with his back pack on. He turned while Carrington placed a red sack she pulled out of the refrigerator a few seconds ago.

  “Have a good day, Jack.”