He poured himself another glass and held it up. He had more to say.

  “I also want to say congratulations to Carrington and Jackson. They finally made it back together.” Jamie took a sip and shook his head, “It must be fucking good if you stuck it out for seven years to get another taste.”

  I stood up so fast, it made Carrington gasp, as I lunged over the table at Jamie. He pushed his chair back before I could get a hand on him, but James moved faster. He jumped in front of me and push me away. I tried to get around him, my heart racing and the only thing I could imagine would slow it down, punching this guy in his smug face.

  Carrington face flashed panic and I calmed down.

  “Ok, that’s it. Carrington. Let’s go.” James said as he grabbed her hand with his left while he pushed me toward the bar with his right.

  Kayla had tears running down her face as she watched us leave.

  “Kayla.” Carrington said, but Jamie placed a hand on her arm and she wouldn’t look Carrington in the eye.

  When we got outside, James let go of me and called for a car.

  Carrington stood by the door, hugging herself. She watched me as I calmed down. I approached her, knowing how my sudden loss of control my bring up some bad feeling for her.

  “Baby, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to go off. I couldn’t stand there and watch him talk about us like that.” I reached one arm out and she grabbed it and fell into my arms. I ran my hand up her spin. As she shivered in my arms, I held her tighter.

  “You ok?” I asked.

  She tiled her head up to look at me.

  “Is is wrong that that totally turned me on?”

  I laughed out loud, grabbed her face and placed a quick kiss before pulling her into me and wrapping my arms around her content to never let her go.

  “Sorry to interrupted, but is Kayla going to be ok?” James ask.

  As soon as he finished his sentence, Kayla walked out the door.

  We all stared at her and she smiled. “How’s the food at your hotel?”

  We jumped into the truck and headed back to find out.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Carrington Olivia Butler

  No one spoke on the ride back to the hotel all lost in our own thoughts. I had no clue it had gotten so bad between Kayla and Jamie. I felt bad for my friend. I gnawed on my lips. I felt bad for getting caught up in my own shit to see what was going on with her.

  In college, I didn’t even know she and Jamie has broken up the first time until she came over to babysit Jack hung over and walking funny.

  “Hey guys, listen, if you don’t mind, I’m going to order room services and look at some film,” James said.

  “No,” Kayla said. “Don’t go. It’s still my birthday.”

  He walked over to Kayla and gave her a hug. “You enjoy the rest of your birthday,” he said and kissed her on the cheek. Her cheek turned red and she looked at me and then lowered her head.

  “Ms. Carrington.” He hugged me and whispered,” Take care of your friend.”

  “Night man.” Jackson said and they hugged and we watched James head off to the elevator.

  I glimpsed at Kayla giving James’ back side a once over. She giggled and waved her hand in front of her face. “Hot,” she mouthed and laughed.

  We found a table in the back corner, ordered and sat watching the activity in the lobby. A few people recognized Jackson and pointed, but they didn’t approach the table. He garnered more attention in another city then he did at home.

  “Is it weird, being famous?” Kayla asked.

  “Really weird.”

  “It’s not like this in Phoenix,” I said.

  “Yeah it is, we just don’t go out in Phoenix.”

  I frowned and thought about it. He’s right, we didn’t really go out much.

  “Why don’t we go out much?” I smiled at Jackson, but my expression dropped when I looked at Kayla. Her eyes seemed sad and defeated. Not a good look for my friend.

  “Kayla, what’s going on?”

  “It’s nothing, really.”

  “Kayla,” Jackson and I said in unison.

  “Ok, well. I don’t really know how to explain it. He’s really really boring.”

  “Boring?” I asked.

  “Yes, so boring, like mind numbingly boring.”

  “What we saw tonight wasn’t boring,” Jackson said.

  “He was rude and belligerent, but not boring.” I added.

  “Oh yeah, maybe I should clarify. The real Jamie is boring. The man you guys saw tonight wasn’t the real Jamie. That was drunk Jamie. Alcoholic Jamie. So socially awkward he needs liquid courage Jamie.”

  “Has he always been like that?” I asked.

  “Yes and no. I mean, he was sober for a long time. You know when we broke up before, it was because he couldn’t be with me because I drank and partied. When we got back together, he started drinking again, but it wasn’t a problem or I didn’t notice a problem until the last year.”

  “You’ve been living with that for a year and you didn’t tell me.”

  “Carrington, I can’t tell you this kind of stuff.”

  “Why not?” I asked, raising my voice. Jackson put his hand on my arm. “Seriously, why can’t people talk to me about bad stuff. Why are you all trying to protect me? Did it never occur to you that maybe I could help. That maybe I am the perfect person to help you deal with a alcoholic, narcissistic, lying asshole.”

  I looked back and forth between both of them and it hit me. “Oh my God, you guys really don’t think I can handle it.”

  “Ok, not wanting to state the obvious, but this is about me.”

  “Yeah, right. I’m sorry, but can I say one more thing.”

  “Ok.”

  “I love you. If you’re not happy, I’m not happy. I want to be their for you the same way you were there for me and Jack. Please let me help.”

  “Ok, well you know when we were talking about having kids this afternoon.”

  “Yeah.” I said and looked at Jackson, but he looked at Kayla with his brow furrowed.

  “Well, I told him I didn’t want kids when we got married and he said he understood, but then within in the last year, he has been pressuring me to change my mind. He says that he wants to have a kid so he can feel like he has accomplished something in this world. Isn’t that fucked?”

  “What does he mean accomplish something? Isn’t he a researcher or something?” Jackson asked.

  “He’s an editor, but basically he’s a fact checker and he lives a comfortable life off of my money and at first it didn’t bother him, but now he resent me for it. It’s so frustrating.”

  “Rich people’s problems,” Jackson said and we all laughed.

  “Kayla if your not happy, why are you staying with him. He’s miserable and won’t be happy until he makes you as miserable as he is.”

  “I know, but that means divorce and lawyers and hearings and I feel like it’s a lot less trouble to avoid each other.”

  “What about love?” Jackson asked.

  “What about sex?” I asked and slapped my hand over my mouth.

  “Nice, babe.” Jackson said and laughed.

  “I take care of things,” Kayla said.

  “What about him?” I asked.

  “I’m sure he takes care of things, too.”

  “Kayla, you need to get out and start fresh. You’re an amazing woman and you deserved to be with someone who adores you,” I said.

  “Wow, what have you done to her?” Kayla asked Jackson.

  “What?” They both looked at me like I had tentacles sticking out of my years.

  “This new positive optimistic loved conquers all attitude.” Kayla said as she waved her hands in the air.

  “Well, maybe Jamie was right.” I look back at them. “It is that good.” I winked at Jackson.

  “Ok, maybe a new start is exactly what I need. Move somewhere and start new.”

  “Phoenix has been a good new start for me.” Jackson reached out and grabbed my hand and kissed it. I looked over at Kayla, but her eyes were focused across the lobby.

  “Yeah, Phoenix. They have some nice attractions.” Kayla flashed a smile as two of Jackson’s teammate walking towards the table.

  By the end of dinner, Kayla received not one, but two birthday kisses. The guys curfew came at the perfect time, no telling where this was heading. Kayla had a gleam in her eye made me think she wanted to relive her college indiscretions.

  “You sure you don’t want to stay the night.”

  “No, I need to get back home. I don’t have anything to wear for the game tomorrow.”

  “You ok?”

  “Yeah, I’ll be fine. I am quite mature when I want to be.”

  “You are.” I hugged her waist and she leaned into me like she hadn’t been hugged in a long time.

  “I love you.”

  “I love you, too. I am so happy to see you and Jackson found each other. It gives me hope.”

  “Hope in love.”

  “No, hope in snagging me a hot football player.” I pushed her away.

  “You are so freaking funny.” She climbed in the back of the SUV.

  “I’ll call you in the morning.”

  “Night.”

  I laid away thinking about Kayla and Jamie, Jackson and I. I received text messages from Jack all day.

  Jack: I saw a bird.

  Jack: I saw a fox.

  Jack: I saw a bear. Haha. Jk.

  I worried about him, too. My mind returned to my earlier conversation with Kayla about waiting for something bad to happen. I couldn’t push that feeling out of my head. I knew Kayla was to smart and had way too much pride to let her issues with Jamie ruin her life. Jackson and I grew closer every day, but something lingered on the edge of my consciousness. Something I had forgot or couldn’t predict and I almost wanted it to happen all ready. The waiting drove me insane.

  As I drifted off, my phone buzzed and a soft knock woke me up. I grabbed my phone to check the time, it was three am.

  Jackson: Wake your sexy ass up and let me in.

  I grinned as I jumped up to open the door.

  I peered through the crack in the door, checking out my man standing there with a fitted t-shirt, baggy sweat pants and slippers. I opened the door wide and pulled him in by the bottom of his shirt. He leaned in and grabbed face in his hands before landing a kiss followed by his tongue in my mouth. We found the bed in the dark and collapsed on it. Jackson’s body on top of mine. I pushed his shirt up and he pulled it over his head and I bit my lip, as my hand traveled down his beautiful chest and down his abs. He sat up on his knees and pushed the bottom of my shirt up.

  “Nice,”he said, discovering I had nothing else on as his hands roamed free. He slid his finger between my legs and grinned as he kissed me. “What have you been dreaming about?”

  He licked his fingers and grinned. I moaned as he kissed me and tasted myself on his lips.

  “Dreaming about my hot football player.”

  Jackson removed his shorts and laid back on top of me while enjoying the friction we were creating with our bodies, but I wanted more.

  “I want you inside of me.”

  “What’s the magic word?” Jackson said as his hips moved against mine. His eyes glazing over in bliss.

  “I love you.” I said and it must have been the perfect words because he slide in me and said them back to me over and over again.

  Jackson and I both came with a shutter and a primal grunt and I felt bad for the people in the room next to us. I hoped it wasn’t one of his teammates.

  “Damn Carrington.” Jackson rolled on his side and kissing my face and neck and any where else his lips could reach.

  “What?”

  “God, your amazing. And fucking sexy as hell. What got into you tonight?”

  “I don’t know. This whole weekend has been messing with my head. Being with you sweating and moaning and making each other feel good, quiets my mind.”

  “You’re worried about Kayla?”

  “Kayla, Jack, You and me. I’m worried about everything.” I sat up and Jack rolled onto his back. “Mainly I worry about our future.”

  “You talking our as in you and me or our like as in mankind?”

  I looked down at him, his chest rising in falling, still trying to catch his breath from our sexy activities a minute before.

  I crawled on him, straddling him and laid my hands on my chest. He kissed the top of my head and held me tight.

  “Never mind.” I said and squeezed him back.

  “Hey.” He tugged on my hair and I looked up “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing,” I laid my head back down. “Do you really think it’s wise to have sex the night before a game. Doesn’t it mess with your leg strength or something?”

  “It’s a night game. I have plenty of time to recover, besides that’s a myth.”

  “Really? Ok, if you go out there short arm it all day because you have no strength in your follow through, we are never doing it again.”

  He yanked on my hair and I placed my chin on his chest.

  “Don’t even joke about something like that.”

  I bit my lip and crawled the rest of the way up his chest, so that I could kiss him and feel every ounce of the confidence and certainty he felt in us being together.

  While I trusted him about his physical readiness for a game, his mental state worried me. If I told him what was going on in my head, he may not recover in time.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Carrington Olivia Butler

  Our trip to New York turned out better then expected. Kayla showed up minutes after Jackson snuck back to his room. Between Jack and his team rules, I wondered if we would every have the opportunity to sleep in together.

  We spent the day shopping and Mr. Griffin and Jack returned from the back woods in time to join us for the game.

  He told me all about his trip in between plays and it seemed I did the right thing by letting him go. His asthma stayed under control the whole time, he didn’t kill anything and to top the weekend off even better, Jackson played the best game of the season and the Cardinals won.

  The paper canceled the interview, so that turned out good. I have a feeling Mr. Griffin has something to do with it, but he denied it.

  We Griffin’ed them after all.

  I would like to say the sinking feel went away, but it only faded in the background. So when I got a call from Julia that following Tuesday, saying she took Jack to the hospital. I wasn’t surprised. I sent Jackson a text to meet us there.

  I entered the emergency room and Jack’s whimpered as the doctors spoke to him trying to calm him down. I followed the sound and found Jack pale and bug eyed with tears streaming down his face. He alternated between sad whimper and coughing. Cough that shook the whole bed. He keep trying to remove the mask. As soon as he saw me, he sat back and stopped fidgeting. Like seeing me, calmed him a little, but something else behind his eyes caught my attention. His shoulders slumped and his eyes flickered and closed and his whole body when limp and his lips turned blue.

  Call it paranoia or the power of suggestion, but I knew that look. Somehow, he found out about Josh and it devastated him.

  The machine regulating his breathing buzzed and an alarm sounded. Doctor’s and more nurses rushed in. Jack’s whole body shook. A nurse put her arms around my shoulder and pulled me to the far wall and kept rubbing my arm and telling me to calm down.

  I tried not to push her away, her words weren’t necessary, I remained calm. I stood there and watched them work on my son, willing him to breath.

  The doctor’s screamed commands at each other and one pushed medicine in his IV while another placed a tube down Jack’s throat. I clutched my neck, feeling the tube entering my throat. Even it it helped him, it felt intrusive and looked scary.

  A sob rang out from the corner and Julia stood by the window crying and praying in Spanish.

  As soon as they got the oxygen connected, color returned to his body and his chest raised and fell at a steady pace.

  I exhaled. I didn’t realize I had been holding my breath, like if my little guy couldn’t breath, I had no right to breath either.

  Jack’s doctor walked up to me, took my arm and pulled me into the hall. I looked back at Julia and she followed.

  “What happen?” I asked.

  “Jack came home from school crying and he couldn’t catch his breath.”

  “Did something happen at school?” the doctor asked.

  “I don’t know, he said he was fine, but I got scared and brought him in anyway.”

  “You did the right thing.” I grabbed Julia’s hand.

  “This was the worse one I’ve seen from him. His doctor in Florida had to intubate him once before, what triggered it that time?”

  “He was at the beach and got stung by a jelly fish.”

  “He was allergic?”

  “No, it just freaked him out that it induced an asthma attack. He stopped breathing as the ambulance arrived. Could stress do that? Like if he got really upset about something, it could trigger this kind of reaction?”

  “I would have to say something weakened his system first, but yeah, stress could exacerbate it to this level.”

  “Maybe something happened on the hunting trip.”

  “Even if he had an attacked that he controlled with his inhaler, he might not have recovered enough. Let’s let him sleep a while, and we’ll talk more about it when he wakes up.

  “Can you take the tube out of his throat before he wakes up?”

  The doctor reaches for my arm and squeezes it. “Let’s see how he does in the next couple of hours.”

  I headed back into the room. I sent Julia to the cafeteria to get us some coffee.

  Jack laid still. I watched his chest rise and fall and didn’t realize anyone else had walked into the room until Jackson gasped.

  “Jackson, he’s fine,” I said as I pushed him out into the hall.

  “What the fuck is going on? What happened? He was fine this morning.”

  “I know. He had an asthma attack and it was really bad, but they needed to help him breath because he wasn’t doing it on his own.”